Title: Magic

Characters: Bertie, Jeeves

Pairings: Bertie/Jeeves in the last one

Summary: What if Jeeves was a wizard from Harry Potter -verse and Bertie found out. 5 drabbles.

A/N: I was cleaning my old computer's memory when I found this and as I think they are pretty good, I might as well publish them again.



"Yes, sir?"

"I think I have been wrong."

"Indeed, sir?"

"You don't sound surprised, Jeeves, now do you?"

"My apologizes, sir. You were saying?"

"That I have been mistaken. You are not a marvel"


"No. You are a wizard."

"Indeed, sir."

"Now, now, don't try to deny it."

"I wasn't, sir, I was merely confirming the fact."

"So it is true? Because that explains a lot. Take the shimmering for example."

"Only partly, sir. That is mainly due to candies called 'Fizzing Whizbees'"

"I didn't know you like candies, Jeeves."

"I do, sir. Would you like one?"

"Thank you, Jeeves."


"Oh. I say!"

"Precisely, sir."


"I wonder, Jeeves…"


"Do you use magic when you do your duties?"

"Yes, sir, but only when no one witnesses it."

"Why is that?"

"There are wizarding laws which forbid the use of magic when any non-magical person is present."

"But now that I know does it make a difference?"

"Yes, sir."



"Can you show me?"


"Some magic. You know, spin the wand and whatnot."

"Very good, sir."


"Does that satisfy you, sir?"



"That was my favourite tie!"

"I am sorry, sir."

"Very well, Jeeves. I won't ask again."

"Thank you, sir."


"I say, Jeeves, that was close!"

"Indeed, sir."

"If you hadn't been there it would be a very dead Wooster here."

"Perhaps not, sir."

"Well, I am grateful that you were nearby."

"I endeavour to give satisfaction."

"Yes, quite, but…"


"How did you know where I was? And how did you know I was in danger?"

"I have this, sir."

"Your pocket-watch?"


"I say! Dashed odd. How does it know when I am at home or Drones or elsewhere?"

"I believe it is called magic, sir."

"Right-o. Explains everything, what? But why there reads 'engaged' when there is already 'at mortal peril'?"

"I really couldn't say, sir."


"Good morning, sir."

"There is nothing good in this morning, Jeeves."

"I am sorry to hear that."

"I say, would you bring me one of your smashing remedies, Jeeves?"

"Here, sir."

"That was fast. I rather think that of all the magical stuff you can do, this one is the best."

"Thank you, sir"

"It is impressive that all you do is take some ordinary stuff and mix them together with a flick of wand, right?"

"Not quite, sir."

"What do you mean?"

"As the main part of the drink is dragon blood, strengthened with eyes of rats, they…"

"Jeeves! Are you saying that this… That I have…"

"Yes, sir."

"I shall never get drunk again."

"Just as you say, sir."


"I say; Jeeves, what have you here?"

"It is a love potion called..."

"Love, Jeeves!"


"Do you realise the danger in that, Jeeves? I have already three fillies doing their very best to drag me down to altar and here you are, cooking up a love potion."

"My apologizes, sir."

"Apology accepted, Jeeves. But I say, it really smells wonderful."


"I think I can smell my morning tea and my favourite brandy and… Jeeves?"


"Have you emptied your after-shave bottle here?"

"No, sir."

"Well, the scent of it is rather strong don't you know."



"I love you too, sir."