Just the guys and me seeing TITANIC... and making a little sensibility test

I don't own TMNT nor TITANIC!


"Tell me again why did I accept to watch this movie?" Raph asked grumpily.

"I wanna prove a theory" I said.

"And what kind of crazy theory is that?" Raph asked again.

"Everyone I know says that this movie makes you cry even if you're stone-cold hearted. Well, I'd watched it like a zillion times and nothing happens to me! Nothing!"

"And you wanna see if this movie can break us?" Don asked.

"Exactly… or at least make you feel a little sad"

"Ok, so… let's watch it" Leo said.

"Since when you started watching romantic movies, fearless?" Raph asked mockingly.

"Why don't you ask that to who?" Mikey asked with a playful voice.

"Shut up, Mikey!" Leo said angrily.

"Shut up everyone! The movie has started already!"

Old Rose: It was a dreadful, heavy thing. I only wore it this once.

Lizzy Calvert: [looking at rose's drawing] you actually believe this is you, nana?

Old Rose: It is me, dear. Wasn't I a dish?

"Hmm… lemme think… ouch! Hey! I was just answering the lady's question" Raph said.

"Raph, shut up and watch the movie in silence!" I said angrily.

Old Rose: It's been 84 years...

Brock Lovett: It's okay. Just try to remember anything. Anything at all.

Old Rose: Do you want to hear this or not, Mr. Lovett? It's been 84 years, and I can still smell the fresh paint. The china had never been used. The sheets had never been slept in. Titanic was called the ship of dreams, and it was. It really was.

Rose Dewitt Bukater: I don't see what all the fuss is about. It doesn't look any bigger than the Mauretania.

Ruth Dewitt Bukater: so this is the ship they say is unsinkable.

Caledon Hockley: It is unsinkable. God himself could not sink this ship.

"And the lesson here is… never try your luck… never against God" I said.

"Yeah, because he'll flood your ship, hehehehe… ouch! What!" Mikey teased but was cut off by a nicely smack in the head, courtesy of… your beloved author.

Old Rose: It was the ship of dreams to everyone else. To me, it was a slave ship taking me back to America in chains. Outwardly, I was everything a well-brought up girl should be. Inside, I was screaming.

The steamer's whistle echoes across Southampton. Pull back, revealing that we were looking through a window, and back further to show the smoky inside of a pub. It is crowded with dockworkers and ship's crew.

Just inside the window, a poker game is in progress. Four men, in working class clothes, play a very serious hand.

Olaf (subtitled) You stupid fishhead. I can't believe you bet our tickets.

Sven (subtitled) You lost our money. I'm just trying to get it back. Now shutup and take a card.

Jack (jaunty) hit me again, Sven.

Jack takes the card and slips it into his hand. The Titanic's whistle blows again. Final warning. Fabrizio puts his cards down. So do the Swedes. Jack holds his close.

Jack: Let's see... Fabrizio's got niente. Olaf, you've got squat. Sven, uh oh... Two pair... Mmm. (turns to his friend) Sorry fabrizio.

Fabrizio: What sorry? What you got? You lose my money? Ma va fa'n culo testa di cazzo…!

Jack: Sorry, you're not gonna see your mama again for a long time... (grinning) 'cause you're goin' to America! Full house boys!

Fabrizio: Porca Madonna! Yeeaaaaa!

The table explodes into shouting in several languages. Jack rakes in the money and the tickets.

Jack (to the Swedes): Sorry boys. Three of a kind and a pair. I'm high and you're dry and... (to fabrizio) ... We're going to-

Fabrizio/Jack: L'America!

Jack kisses the tickets, then jumps on Fabrizio's back and rides him around the pub. It's like they won the lottery.

"Now that's having luck!" Don said.

"Until the end of the movie comes" Mikey said.

"Mikey, don't ruin the experiment ok?" I said.

The movie kept going…

Jack, hearing something, turns as Rose runs up the stairs from the well deck. They are the only two on the stern deck, except for QUARTERMASTER Rowe, twenty feet above them on the docking bridge catwalk. She doesn't see Jack in the shadows, and runs right past him. Rose slams against the base of the stern flagpole and clings there, panting. She stares out at the black water.

Then starts to climb over the railing. She has to hitch her long dress way up, and climbing is clumsy. Moving methodically she turns her body and gets her heels on the white-painted gunwale, her back to the railing, facing out toward blackness. 60 feet below her, the massive propellers are churning the atlantin into white foam, and a ghostly wake trails off toward the horizon.

Jack: Don't do it.

Rose: Stay back! Don't come any closer!

Jack: Come on, just give me your hand. I'll pull you back over.

Rose: No, stay where you are! I mean it! I'll let go!

Jack: [He approaches slowly, gesturing to his cigarette to show that he is approaching merely to throw it over the side into the ocean] No, you won't.

Rose: What do you mean, "No, I won't"? Don't presume to tell me what I will and will not do, you don't know me!

Jack: Well, you woulda done it already.

Rose: You're distracting me! Go away!

Jack: I can't. I'm involved now. You let go, and I'm, I'm 'onna have to jump in there after you.

Rose: Don't be absurd. You'd be killed!

Jack: I'm a good swimmer.

Rose: The fall alone would kill you.

Jack: It would hurt. I'm not saying it wouldn't. Tell you the truth, I'm a lot more concerned about that water being so cold.
[pause. She looks down at the water. Jack is slowly removing his boots]

Rose: How cold?

Jack: Freezing. Maybe a couple degrees over. You ever, uh, you ever been to Wisconsin?

Rose: What?

Jack: Well, they have some of the coldest winters around. I grew up there, near Chippewa Falls. I remember when I was a kid, me and my father, we went ice fishing out on Lake Wissota. Ice fishing is, you know, where you...

Rose: I know what ice fishing is!

Jack: Sorry. You just seem like, you know, kind of an indoor girl. Anyway, I, uh, I fell through some thin ice; and I'm telling you, water that cold, like right down there...
[He gestures with his chin down toward the Atlantic Ocean]

Jack: ... it hits you like a thousand knives stabbing you all over your body. You can't breathe. You can't think. At least, not about anything but the pain. Which is why I'm not looking forward to jumping in there after you.
[They exchange glances]

Jack: Like I said, I don't have a choice. I guess I'm kinda hoping you'll come back over the railing, an' get me off the hook here.

Rose: You're crazy.

Jack: That's what everybody says but, with all due respect, Miss, I'm not the one hanging off the back of a ship here. Come on. C'mon, give me your hand. You don't want to do this.
[She reaches her hand back, he reaches his forward, and he helps her back onto the deck]

The movie kept going on… and on… and on… and on…

Rose DeWitt Bukater: Look, I know what you must be thinking. "Poor little rich girl, what does she know about misery?"

Jack Dawson: No! No, that's not what I was thinking. What I was thinking was, "What could've happened to this girl to make her think she had no way out?"

Rose DeWitt Bukater: It was everything. It was my whole world and all the people in it, and the inertia of my life. Plunging ahead and me powerless to stop it. [shows Jack her engagement ring]

Jack Dawson: God, look at that thing! You would've gone straight to the bottom.

"I don't think so. Maybe the diamond is big but…" Don said.

"Don, it's my experiment not yours so… SHUT UP!" I cut him off.

JACK: Alright, we're going.

We'll drink cheap beer and go on the roller coaster until we throw up and we'll ride horses on the beach...

right in the surf... but you have to ride like a cowboy, none of that side-saddle stuff.

ROSE: You mean one leg on each side? Scandalous! Can you show me?

JACK: Sure. If you like.

ROSE (smiling at him): I think I would.(she looks at the horizon)

And teach me to spit too. Like a man. Why should only men be able to spit. It's unfair.

JACK: They didn't teach you that in finishing school? Here, it's easy. Watch closely. He spits. It arcs out over the water.

JACK: Your turn.

Rose screws up her mouth and spits. A pathetic little bit of foamy spittle which mostly runs down her chin before falling off into the water.

JACK: Nope, that was pitiful. Here, like this... you hawk it down...

HHHNNNK!... then roll it on your tongue,

up to the front, like this, then a big breath and PLOOOW! You see the range on that thing?

She goes through the steps.

Hawks it down, etc. He coaches her through it (ad lib) while doing the steps himself.

She lets fly. So does he. Two comets of gob fly out over the water.

JACK: That was great!

Rose turns to him, her face alight. Suddenly she blanches. He sees her

expression and turns. Ruth, the Countess of Rothes, and

Molly Brown have been watching them hawking lugees. Rose becomes instantly composed.

ROSE: Mother, may I introduce Jack Dawson.

RUTH: Charmed, I'm sure.

"More than charmed I would say… totally grossed out" Don commented. Everyone laughed.