Well hello again! I am terribly sorry for the months and months that I haven't updated. Let's just say..life got crazy and my writing had to take a back seat for a while. No worries! I am back. And I do plan to finish this story. For those of you still sticking with me...THANK YOU. Your support means the world to me and this is why I am continuing to write. I'm not sure when updates will be...it should be a month or less. And feel free to message me and yell at me to get a move on it...it is appreciated.
This is for you! I hope you enjoy. :)
TLOT: Chapter 9 Part I- The Time We Had to Make a Plan
I was in a constant state of turmoil since that weekend. He was all I could think about. Everything was blurred around me because I was lost in my thoughts about him. What was he doing? Was he thinking about me like I was thinking about him? Did he want me like I wanted him?
No. Grow some balls, Jasper. It's like you turned into a chick overnight.
My fingers reached for my phone before I even realized what I was doing.
Hey, what's up? I texted him. I waited.
Finishing up homework. C&R out to eat. He texted me ten minutes later.
My mind turned those words over and over until I realized the one thing that I wanted to do. It had been an entire week since I had seen him. Charlie and Renee were gone…
Hmm, I smirked to myself. It was Friday night, mom wouldn't even expect me to be home anyway.
My feet were off the bed before I could lose my nerve and sit back down. Screw the fucking butterflies and whatever else was rolling around in my stomach. I wasn't a damn pansy either just because I wanted to see him.
Nope. Not at all.
I grabbed my phone and shoved it in my jeans. I was out the door in less than a minute.
It was only when I began walking that the doubts began. What would he think about me coming to see him? I didn't want him to think I was clingy. But damn..I fucking wanted him.
Guess that means you have to get over it, huh?
I shook my head and continued to walk at a faster pace. There was no way in hell that I was going to chicken out now. I had my mind set and there wasn't anything that was going to change it.
I was so focused on my own thoughts that I didn't even realize I was at his house already till I was walking to the front door. That's when it finally hit me.
My palms started sweating and I swear I had trouble breathing. There was only one thing running through my head.
What. The. Hell.
What the hell was I doing here? What the hell was wrong with me? What the hell is happening? What the hell am I supposed to do now?
Too late. My feet carried me up the few porch steps to the door. My hand raised and knocked three times. The rocks rolled around in my stomach and I had to swallow hard against the lump in my throat.
Surprise was written all over his face when he saw me standing there.
"Jasper?" was the only word he managed to get out. I don't know if he would've said more. I didn't care about what he was going to say either.
I pushed him back inside the house and kicked the door shut before pinning him against it and attacking his mouth with mine. His lips instantly responded to mine.
I couldn't help it. I bit and sucked at his lips. My tongue tangled with his and my fingers reached up to grip his short hair. I couldn't breathe; but I couldn't stop either.
My hands slipped from his hair and down his neck. My fingers skimmed his shoulders and down his arms. I pulled him closer to me by the belt loops in his jeans.
I could feel him—how hard he was for me. I made him feel that way. Me—and only me.
I pulled away from him with a gasp—both from lack of oxygen and shock that that thought would even cross my mind.
"What are you doing here?" Edward asked as he tried to control his breathing. What was I supposed to say? I couldn't exactly tell him that I was at home panting at the thought of seeing him and I ended up here…
"I wanted to see you," I said and my eyes slid away from those bright green orbs. I couldn't take him looking at me for some reason. I should've been used to having his eyes on me.
"Jasper," his voice was husky and my hands clenched into fists at my sides. It was too tempting to tilt my head up and look at him. It was even more tempting to kiss him again. "Jasper, look at me." Something in his voice made me do it. I didn't want to. Hell, I was so fucking scared of the reasons I was there in the first place. I didn't know whether to flee or to stay. He made that decision for me.
His fingers reached under my jaw and pulled my face up so I was forced to look at him. My throat closed up as I met his green eyes. All the words left me and I was just left there standing in front of him.
"I wanted to see you too," he said without looking away. It was like he was trying to tell me something without saying anything out loud. Maybe I wasn't crazy. Maybe he wanted this as much as I did.
I waited. I wanted him to kiss me.
I watched those green eyes dart to my mouth and back to my eyes. I willed him to just fucking do it already. It was torture to stay still, to let him come to me. But if he didn't kiss me in the next twenty seconds there was no telling what I was going to do.
Something twisted inside me when I saw him lean towards me. I didn't care though; I was too focused on Edward. My eyes closed instantly and I waited. It felt like the seconds were dragging until I felt his lips touch mine.
It was soft, tentative. The kiss wasn't fueled by the ever-present anger and confusion between us. Sure, it was intense but we weren't shoving each other's tongue down each other's throats. We took our time. It was…different.
Inner chick again, Jasper. Are you going to start referencing him as your knight in shining armor next?
Maybe. I couldn't help but notice more things—like the way his fingers were softly brushing against my neck. His lips were soft but not too insistent.
This should have been our first kiss, I realized.
But it wouldn't have meant this much and you know it.
We pulled away slowly and I was still a little hesitant to meet his eyes. I wasn't used to feeling like this. I wasn't used to being the vulnerable one, not knowing what was going to happen.
You can't always have control.
I guess it was time you learned that.
Luckily, the awkwardness didn't last for long. Edward broke into a smirk and I felt my face heat up. I just couldn't decide whether it was more from embarrassment or from the fact that seeing him smirk wanted to make me do so many naughty things to him.
"You hungry?" he asked and turned, leaving me standing there in the hallway. I guess the only choice I had was to follow him. Edward and food. What's not to like?
"We gotta figure something out," Edward said as he settled on his bed facing me.
"I know," I groaned.
"Two weeks is too damn long," he said with a slight growl in his voice. He had no fucking clue what the growling was doing to me. It was hard to keep myself in check, especially when he was teasing me.
I couldn't look at him. I don't why I insisted on continuing to fight these feelings. It was obvious that I wanted him…so why fight it? Maybe part of me was still scared….scared of screwing this up like I always did.
"Jasper?" he asked quietly. I still didn't open my eyes…still lost in denial. I felt the bed move as he shuffled over to me. I hated the way my heart sped up. I hated the way my hands wanted so badly to yank him even closer to me. I hated how I wanted him so much that I had walked all the way across town to see him.
My arms broke out in goosebumps as soon as his fingers touched me. His hand lightly rested against my neck as he nuzzled his face into my jaw. And I loved how my skin tingled from his touch. I loved how he was the only one who made me feel like this.
Fucked up, right? I loved and hated what he did to me.
Stop fighting it Jasper. For once I agreed.
I grabbed him by the collar and tugged him to me. My fingers reached under his jaw to pull his face to mine. My lips attacked his feverishly. There was no stopping this chaotic feeling that was running through my veins. I reached out for him pulling him even closer. I couldn't get enough. It was never enough. I licked his bottom lip with my tongue, begging for entrance. I fucking needing this and there was no stopping it anymore.
My fingers threaded themselves into his short hair before sliding down to his neck. My lips continued to press into his as our tongues tangled. I would never get tired of this; I would never forget the way he tasted, the way he felt against me.
"Fuck, Jasper," he groaned as he pulled his mouth away from mine. I didn't want this to end so I pressed my lips against his jaw and traveled down his neck. I concentrated on his heavy panting in my ear and the smell of him that was so prominent whenever I was around him. "Jasper," he said again and I immediately moved away to look at him. I needed to know what he was thinking and to see those brilliant green eyes of his.
As soon as I looked at him I wanted to kiss him again. His hair was sticking up in all different directions. His lips were pouty and red from my kisses. But those weren't even comparable to the look in his eyes. No, the look in his eyes had my cock straining against the fabric of my jeans. That look could drive me insane.
Those green eyes were bright with lust. He wanted me. I lost every ounce of control that was keeping me from doing what I wanted the most. I took one look at those lips of his and I was done. He moaned as my mouth returned to his.
I was on fire. I needed him to touch me; I needed to touch him everywhere. My hands found their way underneath his shirt and my fingertips roamed his smooth skin.
"Touch me, Jasper," he moaned breathlessly.
You don't have to tell me twice.
His shirt was off in an instant and my mouth was back on his neck. His moaning was torturous. I wanted to reach down and adjust myself but I didn't want to stop doing what I was doing. I could wait until later. This couldn't. My hands traveled down his chest as I kissed my way up to his ear. Once my fingers touched the top of his jeans I whispered in his ear.
"Do you want me to touch you here?" I asked him as my fingers teased beneath the top of his jeans.
"Please," he groaned. That sound went straight to my dick and I had thought that it was impossible to get even harder. The things this boy did to me….
My fingers teased the skin beneath his jeans before reaching for the button. That's when I heard the front door rattle.
I was off the bed in less than two seconds. I was to the window in less than three. I glanced back at Edward still stunned and staring at me from his bed. I couldn't help noticing how disheveled and turned on he looked. It made me want to think twice.
Don't. Just go.
"Text me," I whispered. I threw one leg out of the window and was ready to jump before I heard him speak.
"Wait," it was barely a murmur but I could still hear. I paused and turned to look at him. He got off the bed and walked towards me all the while never breaking eye contact.
I wasn't aware that he was even kissing me until he pulled away. I was beyond surprised.
"Edward! I'm home!" Renee called. Fuck.
"Go," Edward said pushing me back out the window. I smirked at him before dropping off the edge. I glanced back one more time before sprinting around the corner. Even when I closed my eyes, I could still his.
I was thinking about him when I ran into her. I wouldn't have even noticed her had I she not said anything.
"Jasper?" she asked even though she knew damn well that it was me.
"What's up?" I asked her. I know we weren't always on the best of terms.
"You were over at Edward's weren't you?" she demanded.
"Umm, yeah," I answered her as nonchalantly as possible.
"Why does it matter to you?" I countered.
"It matters to me because Edward is important to me," she stepped closer to me. Those brown eyes of hers were shining with anger.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Yes you do. I see the way you look at him," she said with a hint of a smirk. I didn't say anything. How could I? "I've also seen the way he looks at you- the way he talks about you."
I stood there for a moment. I didn't want to say anything but my curiosity got the best of me.
"What do you mean?"
"Like you haven't noticed," she laughed. "The way he stares at you longingly- the way he would do practically anything you asked him too. It's obvious," her voice began to get angry. "It's also obvious the way you keep stringing him along. All you are ever going to do is hurt him and I can't just stand by and watch."
"I'm not going to hurt him," I growled. I couldn't believe that she was saying this to me. I can't believe that I was still standing there. I should have just walked away.
"You already did," she glared at me. "He deserves so much better than you."
"You're only saying this because he doesn't want you," I countered. If looks could kill I would have been dead.
"Once he gets tired of your bullshit he will leave. Once you hurt him so badly he is going to walk away and he is never going to come back. Just you wait and see," she smiled and began to walk away.
I was left there standing with clenched fists and anger rippling off of me.
Even though you're mad, you might just want to take her advice.
What advice? I wasn't ever going to hurt Edward. Not again anyway. I cared about him too much.
I started my walk back home again with her words repeating themselves in my head. There was only so much time left. I was graduating high school in a week. Then there were only three months left. Three months until my dad was gone and he took Edward with him.
He still doesn't know.
I still didn't know what to do.
I was super excited to go to my dad's house that night. It was all I could think about for days. My last day of school had been three days before and I had done nothing but pace and think. I was restless, and I also really wanted to see Edward.
"He will be here soon, sweetie," my mom smiled from her place where she was curled up on the couch reading. She probably thought I was excited to see my dad, not the boy that lived there. I desperately wanted to tell someone about all this but I didn't know how.
And I was just a little bit scared of being judged. I had always been used to being liked. Having people judge me based on who I was attracted to wasn't anything I was used to. I didn't know what to do.
"I know," I breathed and sat down for a minute. I hated feeling restless and I also hated the butterflies that were constantly in my stomach these days.
They weren't good butterflies either. I mean this was it. Graduation was merely a few days away. Sure, I had three months but I didn't know what was going to happen. Life was going to get serious, too fast and too soon.
You need to tell him.
I couldn't. He was going to hate me for it. Besides I wasn't the one that was supposed to tell him. What was I supposed to do? Was there anything I could do?
He would hate me if he found out.
About which part?
Not only did he not know that he was going to be moving in three months, but he also didn't know that my mom was the one to kill his dad. And I didn't tell him any of that.
Great. I'll guess I would just have to deal with things as I had always done. Forget about them and see what happens.
A horn sounded and broke me out of my musings. The butterflies were back full force and this time they were of the good kind. He was out there.
"Bye mom," I couldn't help but smile.
"Have fun," she called as I ran out of the door.
I was still smiling as I got in the car. He was there, green eyes as shocking as always and sexy as hell. He smirked as he looked me over and I could see those his eyes darken.
Maybe I was turning into a masochist. Either way, I was beginning to love the torture.
It was just like old times. The four of us were going out to eat. I guess I had come a long way since I used to hate this. Then again, I was practically a different person. Funny how things change, huh? I smirked to myself as I slid into a booth with Edward following behind me.
I could hardly eat or pay attention to anything around me. I was too focused on how close he was next to me. I loved it but it was fucking torture. The hairs on my arm were practically standing on end from his closeness. And somehow every time he moved he managed to brush against me in some way. I was already straining against my jeans and three seconds away from begging him to touch me there at the damn table.
I was pretty sure he knew it too. I felt him jostle around next to me putting his phone into his pocket. I shifted my eyes to him. I was ready to either jump him at the table or kick him for being such a tease. He smirked and I looked away quickly.
I tried to pay attention to what Charlie and Renee were saying. The words just went in one ear and out the other. It was like a foreign language to me. I was still trying to focus when he touched me.
It was out of nowhere and I jumped in my seat at the contact. His fingers were brushing against the bulge in my pants beneath the table. It felt so good I had to clench my teeth from moaning.
What the fuck was this boy doing to me? Here I was on the edge of cumming and he was barely touching me. It was unbelievable and too damn good.
"So when is your graduation?" Edward asked with a smirk. This was truly evil and I was most definitely going to get him back later.
"Umm…Wednesday," I said. Renee and Charlie were now paying attention to me thanks to Edward. It was hard to force the words out with Edward's hands moving against me. I wanted to thrust my hips up into his hand and put myself out of my misery.
No such luck for that.
"Are you excited?" Renee smiled at me from across the table.
"Yeah," I managed to get out. I wanted to reach down and move Edward's hand away but it would look too obvious.
And you're enjoying it just a little bit.
"You're finally grown up," my dad smiled proudly. I didn't like the mention of me being a kid, but hey, at least he was trying.
"Yeah, bet you're happy about that," I teased. He actually laughed. I couldn't help smiling despite the ongoing torture.
"I'm so happy for the both of you boys," Renee gushed. She was on the verge of tears. I guess it was a mom thing that I wouldn't ever understand. "I have some news though," she looked at Charlie with a small smile. Luckily Edward had stopped his teasing and I was able to catch the look on my dad's face. He looked…scared.
That could only mean one thing.
I panicked. I tried not to look at any of the three of them. I didn't want this to happen. Not now, not when things were finally coming together. I could NOT have another thing fall apart in my life so soon.
But I guess no one really has control of when things happen do they? Fuck.
"What news?" Edward asked. I closed my eyes for a moment, praying that what I thought was about to happen wasn't really happening. Too late for that.
"Charlie and I have already discussed this…and well, we think that it would be good for us to have a change in scenery," she said.
"What do you mean?" Edward asked. I could feel him tense up.
"We're moving at the end of the summer. We already found the perfect house in Phoenix," she smiled brightly like it was the greatest thing in the world that they were leaving.
Edward didn't say a word and I couldn't help but glance over at him. I watched as he got up and walked away without even a glance at my dad or Renee. He just left. And sadly, I knew how it felt to walk away. Hell, I had been there just months before.
"Should I go after him?" Renee asked. Without even looking at her I could tell that she had tears in her eyes. I guess he didn't take the "great" news so well did he?
"No. It's best to let him be," my dad said as he looked at me while he rubbed her shoulder comfortingly. I wanted to go after him but I knew he needed his space.
After Renee settled down a bit we left the restaurant awkwardly. Not a word was spoken on the way home. The tension was almost touchable. I wanted nothing more than to get out of the car as soon as possible. No, what I really wanted was to help Edward, to show that I was here for him- just like he was there for me through all of my shit.
Luckily the drive was short and I was relieved to get out of the car. Renee wasn't saying anything although my dad was trying to reassure her. I knew Edward wasn't going to be there as soon as I walked into the house. Would he come back tonight? Where was he?
I threw my stuff onto the bed in Edward's room. I could hear Renee and Charlie beginning to argue in the other room.
"Are you sure that this is the best thing?" my dad was asking her.
"How dare you ask me that!" I could just imagine the furious look on her face. "After all we have been through we deserve a change. He deserves to be happy."
"What makes you think that he isn't happy here?" my dad countered. His voice was getting rough and I knew that he was beginning to get angry too.
"Happy? You think he's happy?" she screeched.
I hurriedly made my way out of Edward's room and onto the front porch. I didn't want to hear this. It hurt to even hear, let alone see. It was easy to picture how my mom and dad split. Just thinking about it made my stomach clench.
I sighed and tried not to think about. Things would be alright.
Keep telling yourself that.
I didn't know how long I sat there. I just kept hearing the same things over and over again- Renee and my dad's fight, Alice's warning. My head was swimming and I wanted to just block everything out. It was one of those times when I just wanted to say fuck the world and do whatever I wanted.
No such luck.
So I sat there, avoiding everything. It was the least I could do. Too bad everything couldn't avoid me. My dad came out and sat on the steps with me.
"What's up, kid?" my dad asked with a sigh. I just shrugged my shoulders. "So, you didn't tell him?" he asked. I went from annoyed to pissed in less than a second.
"You told me not to. It's not my place." He sighed again.
"I didn't think you would listen to me," he admitted.
"And why's that?" I asked. I was angry and I knew that it would only take one little thing to set me off.
"You care about him. I didn't think that you could just not say anything…" he trailed off. There was that spark.
"I do fucking care about him! Why do you think I didn't say anything to him? I don't want to hurt him like you and Renee. But guess what? It's too late for not hurting him because I already did that. I just get to sit by and watch while I can do nothing about it," I vented.
"Jasper, I'm sorry," he said softly.
"Whatever," I mumbled. I was hurt, and shocked that I had even said anything in the first place. I wasn't the one who spewed my feelings like a chick having an emotional breakdown. Plus, I just openly admitted to caring about him although it should have been obvious anyway.
I sat there without saying another word to him. He could sit there all fucking night and I wasn't going to say another damn word to him. It wasn't worth it, not when he never understood.
We were still sitting there in an angry silence when he walked up. It was almost dark and I would not even have noticed it was him had I not been looking for him.
"Hey," he mumbled as he reached us. His face was mostly expressionless, except for those eyes of his. In his eyes you could see everything.
"You doing alright kid?" my dad asked. I could see the concern etched on his face. Edward just shrugged his shoulders and walked into the house with a sigh. A moment later we could hear them talking. A minute later and it turned into yelling.
"Why do you have to make all the choices for me?" I heard Edward yell.
"I should go in there," my dad muttered.
"I just want you to be happy," Renee said fiercely.
"I am happy," Edward practically growled.
"You haven't been happy since your dad died," Renee countered.
"Sweetie, maybe we should just think about all of this," I heard my dad say. If he knew what was good for him he would just say out of it.
"So your solution is to just leave then?" Edward said to her as if my dad hadn't even said a word.
"It would be good for all of us," Renee sighed.
"No it wouldn't. It would be good for you. I don't want to leave because leaving means leaving him behind! You're forcing me to leave the only place I have ever known. How the fuck is that supposed to make me happy?"
Dead silence. I had never heard him say anything like that before, to anyone. And what made it worse was it took a lot for Edward to fall apart, to explode and not hold anything back.
"Don't talk to me like that," Renee's voice broke.
"Don't make me leave," he replied.
There was a moment of silence and then there was the recognizable sound of a door slamming. I didn't move; there was nothing I could do to help anyway so I might as well just stay out of it.
"C'mon, I think you need to calm down for a bit, sweetie," my dad was saying as they walked out of the door.
"Okay," I heard her sniffle. I watched as my dad helped her into the car. I could tell that he really cared for her and that this whole thing was eating him up as well.
"Jasper," he called.
"We'll be back later, alright? I'll give you a call if anything comes up." I nodded. He jumped into the car and soon they were gone.
Well fuck. What was I supposed to do now? I would have to go in eventually. But what about Edward?
I had to help him some way, or at least try. I sighed and walked into the house. I took my time closing and locking the door behind me. I knew why I was stalling, I just didn't want to admit it to myself.
When are you going to admit you're scared of being pushed away? It's what you always did wasn't it? What goes around comes around.
I made my way quietly to Edward's room. I didn't know what to expect and I had nerves tumbling around in my stomach. I knocked once. No answer.
Twice. No answer.
"Edward?" I asked hesitantly. It was now or never. I opened the door.
He was sitting there on the floor. He took one glance at me and it was enough to see that he had tears in his eyes.
"Edward?" I asked again. I moved over to where he was sitting and took a seat right next him. "Please say something, anything." He didn't move and I began to worry. "Did you want me to leave?" I asked softly. When he still didn't say anything I began to get up.
"Please, stay," his voice was so quiet that I barely even heard him.
"Okay," I sighed and settled myself back next to him. I watched him wipe his face out of the corner of my eye. I knew that he didn't want me to see him cry. Hell, no one ever wanted that.
I sat there and waited. I knew that he would only talk when he was ready to. This wasn't something that you could just force out of a person. I would know.
"I don't want to leave," he said quietly. I waited to see if he would say anymore. "My dad lived here his entire life. This is where I grew up. I can't leave the only city that I have ever known. And this the only part of my dad that I can keep…" he trailed off.
He laughed humorlessly. "And my mom is right, you know." Wait, what? Did this mean that he was just going to go along with it and leave? I looked down so that way he couldn't tell what I was thinking.
"Right about what?" I had to ask-had to torture myself even more.
"That I haven't really been happy since my dad died. I'm constantly surrounded by the places and things that make me miss him the most.
"I'm sorry—" he cut me off.
"I'm not done," he said with this intense look in his eye. "She was right for a while, but not anymore. Don't you see, Jasper? You make so happy; you make me forget. I don't want to stay just because of my dad. I want to stay because of you- because I need you," his voice broke.
I couldn't fucking take it anymore. I wasn't going to sit there while he said all those things and not doing anything. It was impossible.
I moved so that way I was kneeling in front of him. He had his face turned away and I knew damn well that he had tears in his eyes.
"Edward," I said his name. Something rolled around in my stomach and I didn't know if it was butterflies or something else entirely. I reached out and held his jaw in my hand. "Please look at me." I could feel how reluctant he was but he did it anyway. I was right too; there were those unshed tears in those pretty green eyes of his. "I need you, too," I told him. It was the truth anyway. He'd gotten me through more shit than anyone in the last few months. "I'm not going to leave you, ever. Even if your mom takes you away I will always be here. I'm not going anywhere, Edward."
A tear rolled down his cheek and he closed his eyes. I moved my thumb to brush it away and he opened his eyes again. I couldn't read him; I didn't know what the hell he was thinking. Then he grabbed me by my collar and pulled me over him. I didn't even have a second to think before his lips were on mine and he was kissing me.
At first the kiss was urgent and I could feel how needy he was. Then, somehow the kiss turned into something more gentle…and full of longing. I kissed him softly as I pressed my lips against his. I would never get tired of how he tasted or it felt when he touched me. I would never want to stop my fingers from running through his hair.
"I'm never gonna let you go," I breathed as I pulled away. I felt his hands tighten on the holds he had on my shirt. I kissed the underside of his jaw and up to his ear. "I'm not going to let you leave," as I pulled away.
"How?" he asked. He kissed me softly before pulling away.
"I don't fucking know," I groaned. "We need to make her change her mind. We need to make her want to stay." Edward began getting up next to me and I stared at him. What was he doing? What did I say? I watched as he walked over to the door and locked it. The next thing I know he was standing over me with his hand held out.
"C'mon, Jasper. Grab my hand," he said. There was a smirk on his face and damn he looked so fucking sexy. I reached up my hand and he yanked me to him. "We have time to worry about it later, right?" I nodded and my breathing hitched as he nipped at my Adam's apple. "Good, because there is a more pressing issue right now," he said as he pressed his hips against mine.
"Oh fuck," I groaned as I could feel how hard he was in his pants.
"This is what you do to me, Jasper." As soon as the words were out of his mouth my self-restraint snapped. My mouth was pressed against his in an instant. I licked his lips practically begging for entrance. He opened his mouth to me and I swirled my tongue against his. His taste was overwhelming and I couldn't get enough.
He started pressing against me and he walked backwards. Soon, the bed was against the back of my legs and he was on top of me. Another moan escaped out of me. I crawled backwards to the center of the bed all the while continuing to kiss him.
I was so fucking hard and the way he was moving on top of me was driving me crazy. My hands traveled down his back and fisted the end of his t-shirt tugging him closer to me. He pulled away from my mouth, breathing heavily.
"Can I touch you again, Jasper? Please?" he stared at me with those lustful eyes. How in the hell was I supposed to say no.
"Yes," I growled. My hands slid under his t-shirt feeling his smooth skin. I felt Edward's fingers skim mine as he pulled his shirt up. "I've wanted you so bad." The comment just flew out of my mouth. The more he touched me the more the filter in my head disappeared. Hell, he could ask me anything and I would probably tell him anything.
That's what he did to me. And I didn't hate it. No, I fucking loved it.
My fingers trailed their way up his chest. My mouth found its own path up his neck. I paused along to way to nip at the sweet skin of his. His hips bucked into me and he groaned.
Hmm. Guess he liked that.
I couldn't help smirking. It was hard to keep a straight face knowing that I was doing this to him.
He's driving you nuts, too. So, don't get too cocky motherfucker.
I wrapped my arms around him to bring him down, to bring him closer to me. But he pulled back.
"What? What's wrong?" I asked breathlessly.
"This," he said. "this, is what's wrong." He grabbed a fistful of my shirt and yanked it up. "I want it off." Those green eyes were blazing. I tore off my shirt in a rush and pulled him down on top of me. My hips bucked into his relentlessly. A constant stream of moans were pouring out of my mouth. It was so good- so fucking good.
My fingers found his belt and I was just about to undo it. The sound of jingling could be heard but I wasn't opening his jeans. He was paused above me.
I looked at him as we both stayed there, frozen. I tried to listen over the sound of our heavy breathing.
Jingling again and then the sound of a door closing.
Edward jumped off me so fast that he stumbled off the bed and rolled. I was horny as hell but that shit was still hilarious. I was laughing so hard I could barely get my shirt back on. I glanced over at Edward. His face was beet red and he had a pretty mark on the side of his neck because of me. I laughed harder. He glanced over at me and made an attempt to scowl.
"C'mon, it's funny," I said once I stopped laughing enough so I could talk. I watched as he smiled. He was still wearing that blush which did absolutely nothing to help the situation in my pants.
I watched as he walked over to the door and unlocked it. I moved off of Edward's bed and tried to fix my hair which I knew must have looked like a mess. I sat down on the futon on the other side of the room.
I tried not watch Edward as he busied himself around his room. Complete fail on my part. How was I supposed to look away when he looked so fucking good? He was still hard and I wanted to nothing more than unzip his jeans and touch him.
My dad and Renee were such cockblockers.
I groaned and closed my eyes against the bed. I was so focused on calming myself down that I didn't hear him walk over to me.
"I know what you're thinking," he whispered in my ear. I jumped a bit but didn't open my eyes. "Later," he said and kissed my neck before I heard him walk away. Ugh. He knew what he was doing to me, that little tease.
Payback's a bitch, huh?
I listened as the door opened and closed. He was probably going to apologize to his mom and hopefully get things sorted out.
You know it won't be that easy.
Well, I could always hope. But he had to learn these things, too. I guess I really had come a long way in a few months. It was kind of scary but I knew that it had to happen sometime. We all had to grow up.
No, fuck that. I was still going to have fun. I just had to do it more…rationally. If that was possible.
I put down the futon and put on some gym shorts. I didn't know how long it was going to be so I might as well make myself more comfortable. Although, it's pretty hard to get comfortable when you have a monster in your pants.
And it's even more uncomfortable when your dad comes into the room while you're lying a bed with a monster in your pants.
"Hey," he said as he sat on the foot of the bed. I sat up, trying to cover my groin the best I could without looking obvious.
"What's up?" I asked.
"Can I ask you something?" he hesitated.
"Yeah…" What was this about? Did he guess about the things that were happening between me and Edward?
"If I were to ask you to come with us at the end of the summer what would you say?" I didn't know what came over me. I went from relieved to angry to confused in less than three seconds. If that didn't give you a headache I don't know what would.
"I can't leave mom," I said truthfully. "But I really want you guys to stay."
"I know," he sighed.
"Can't you talk to Renee about it? Convince her?"
"I don't know." That brief shot of hope was ruined.
"Edward doesn't want to leave, you don't want to leave…what's her deal?" I asked.
"She's scared," he admitted. "of people finding out. She thinks it looks bad considering everyone in the situation. She doesn't want anyone to find out…least of all Edward. She wants what's best for him and so do I."
"What's best for him isn't leaving," I spat out between clenched teeth.
"Maybe. But there might not be any room to change her mind. She wants to start over…a new page." I sighed. "I'll try, Jasper. I promise." He looked at me. I never realized how tired he looked.
"Okay," I muttered. It wasn't like I could ask him for more. He patted my knee before getting up and leaving.
Well…maybe there's a little hope left.
I was asleep, or maybe deep in thought, when I felt Edward shake my shoulder.
"You still awake?" he whispered.
"Yeah," my voice was gravelly.
"Oh, okay," I heard him shuffle over to his bed on the other side of the room. I wanted him to come back over. I mean, I didn't really want to fool around although I wouldn't put up much of a fight if he wanted to. What I really wanted was to just hold him like I did in the tent a few weeks back.
And maybe you'll grow some balls and actually put your arms around him?
Maybe. But now he was getting into his own bed. Why the fuck didn't I say anything when he was standing right there? Why couldn't I just get this right for once?
You know what to do.
\ I did. It was just the matter of doing it.
Are you going to wait for him to fall asleep and miss your chance? Now.
I threw off the blanket that was thrown over me. I sat up and ran a hand through my hair. Before I walked over to Edward's bed I went to the door and locked it.
My heart was pounding a mile a minute as I walked to his bed. Questions kept turning in my mind. Like…What the hell am I doing? Should I just go back to my own bed? Since when was I starting to act like a chick?
This didn't used to be me. I guess it was me now.
I couldn't stop that pull that lured me over to him. I hated it but I fucking loved it, too. I guess it isn't worth it if it doesn't screw with your head.
Stop analyzing the state of your gayness and get your ass over there.
I reached his bed and waited for a moment.
"Edward?" I asked hesitantly. Part of me prayed that he was asleep.
"Yeah?" he asked. I reached down and felt for where he was lying.
"Can I…" I stopped for a moment, nervous. "Can I come in?" I asked. It was silent for a moment and I began to panic.
"Sure," I couldn't tell what he was thinking by the sound of his voice. I heard him slide over and lift the blanket for me.
I slid into the warm bed. For a few seconds it was extremely awkward. Then Edward turned around and I could feel his hand reaching for me. His fingers found my face and pulled me to him for a kiss.
"We don't have to fool around. I just wanted to…" I trailed off as I felt my face get hot. I really was turning into a chick.
"Cuddle?" Edward chuckled a bit. "And to think I was the only one who liked cuddling?" he teased. I laughed.
I felt Edward move closer until I could feel him pressed up against me and his head on my chest. I couldn't tell you how I felt at that moment. I could only picture those cliché Disney movies with those cheesy love songs playing in the background. Either way, it was fucking awesome.
"So how did everything go?" I asked.
"Ugh. I'll explain in the morning," he sighed.
"Okay," I told him. It was best to just leave it for one night anyway. I turned and he did the same. His back was pressed up against my front again. Only this time I was going to do it right.
I slid my arm underneath his and pulled him closer to me. He threaded his fingers and sighed before resting against me.
The rocks moved in my stomach again…and this time, well, I fucking loved that, too.
Waking up with Edward...was indescribable. Legs were tangled and arms were thrown about. Somehow he ended up spooning me and his head was nestled into the back of my neck. He was the one who woke up before me seeing as he was the one kissing me and running his hands down my back.
So fucking good. I was harder than a rock but luckily I wasn't tenting the blanket.
"You awake yet?" he murmured in my ear before kissing behind it.
"Fuck yes," I groaned and flipped so that way I was facing him. I leaned in for a kiss but he turned his head. "Why not?" I asked. I needed to kiss him so badly.
"Morning breath," he smirked from behind his hand.
"I don't care," I countered. I pulled his hand away from his mouth and replaced it with my lips. I gave him a few chaste kisses before pulling away. "Good morning," I smiled.
"Morning," he smirked back. "and to you too," he said glancing down at the bulge in my pants. I had no time for being embarrassed. "Want me to take care of that for you?" he said looking back at me.
Fuck. Was he serious? Please tell me he's serious.
"Umm…" I didn't know what to say.
"I'll take that as a yes. I barely had time to process that before he was pulling down my shorts and I was in his hand. I hissed at the feeling of finally being touched. All that torture and no release had practically killed me that day before. At least now it was paying off. Maybe payback wasn't such a bitch after all.
"Oh god, Edward," I moaned as he stroked me. He moved so that way he was kneeling above me. I tilted my face to kiss him and my tongue found his greedily.
"Does that feel good?" he asked with a smirk. All I could do was moan. Any word that came out of my mouth wouldn't be intelligible. I reached for him and rubbed him through his pajama pants. He was hard and straining to get out. Another moan came out as his hips bucked into my hand.
"Don't stop," I panted. I was close. So close. I didn't care that I was cumming so fast…I just needed to come.
"Cum for me, Jasper," Edward said as he stroked me faster. "I wanna make you feel so good." I bit my fingers to keep from moaning even louder. I couldn't take it anymore.
"Edward," I groaned. My hips continued to thrust into his hand as I came.
"Oh fuck yes," I heard Edward murmur. Hearing him cuss almost made me hard again. I was breathing heavy as I closed my eyes and leaned back against the pillows. "Damn, that was fast," he smirked.
"Shut up you cocky fucker," I laughed.
"Make me," he smirked even harder. Hmm. No problem there.
I reached down and slid my hand into his pajama pants. My fingers wrapped around his cock and tugged. "Ohh," he moaned.
"I guess that shut you up," I smirked. Those green eyes stared at me hungrily before he kissed me again. His hips thrust against me and his head was thrown back as he panted. I felt my cock stir just watching him.
"Feels so good," he moaned.
"Breakfast time kiddos," my dad called. Edward's thrusts began getting weaker and weaker.
"Sorry," I couldn't help smirking a little.
"No, you're not," he grumbled but kissed me anyway.
"You know I am," I said as he got off me and I slid out of his bed. "C'mere." I reached out and pulled him into a hug. "I'll take care of you later," I rubbed him again.
"Nope. I'll take care of it in the shower," he smirked. "Only thinking of you baby," he said as he swaggered out of the bedroom and around the corner.
Things were still tense. Nobody would really say anything or even look at one another. It was weird that for once it wasn't because of me, or something I did or said. No, this time it was much more serious. Which made it even worse.
I finished my breakfast as soon as possible. I avoided any eye contact with anyone so as not to start anything. The last thing we needed was another repeat of the day before. Maybe if we all just let it go for now things would be alright. Not.
What we needed was a plan.
Edward and I ended back up in his bedroom after our silent breakfast.
"Okay, so what happened last night?" I asked.
He sighed before answering. "Nothing. We apologized but she still won't budge about moving."
"We need to do something."
"Like what? Tie her to a bedpost and knock some sense into her?" he laughed humorlessly.
"No. We need to convince her that you're happy. That staying here is the best choice." I paced the floor thinking. "What would make her stay?" I wondered out loud.
"Well, if Charlie wanted to stay that would help too."
"He does want to stay."
"He hasn't said anything to her…" What the hell is wrong with him? He said he would try his best to convince her! Didn't that mean putting in his two cents? Ugh.
"Okay…so we need something to tie her here. Something that would make her unbelievably happy…"Edward thought out loud.
"This fucking sucks," I muttered. I sat down on the bed and ran my hands through my hair. What was I going to do? Was there really anything to do?
"I have an idea!" Edward burst out. The look on his face..was so hopeful that it was almost hard to look at.
"Really?" I asked. He was next to me in two seconds. He kissed me again and again until I was dizzy. I could barely even remember my own name. "Wait," I breathed. "What is your idea?"
"I know this will work," he beamed.
"And it is….." I trailed off.
I know, I know...I dont write for more than 8 months and then I leave it at a cliffhanger...I'M SORRY! It was a good ending point...and I figured that I should get this out as soon as possible for you all. I hope you enjoyed it... Please let me know what you think!