Hey there! Well, here's another SxH fic- and probably a really strange one, at that. Very 'special' like me. xD
Alrighty, before you plunge headfirst into my confusing fanfic (currently my favorite SxH one :D), there's a few things you need to know:

- Haji is dead. Yeah, I think that sucks too. Please don't tell me: "But hes aliev! Liek, OMG, what iz wrong wit u?" I know that, this
is just a slightly AU fic. ^W^

- Nathan has bred an army of chiroptereans, and this fanfic takes place in the very middle of the uprising battle.

- Saya has been awake for 2 years. Sorry if there's any plotholes in here, I really tried to keep them all out (please point them out if you
spot them :) )

- This is all set after Saya wakes (well, two years afterward, psh) from her 30-year sleep for the the first time after episode 50.

Well, all I can say now is that I hope you enjoy it! Please review, its so appreciated! ^W^


Saya saw the crimson blood fly before her eyes before she felt the hole in her chest.


She whispered, and Nathan's grotesque face took the form of a monster's smile as he twisted his spearlike arm arm in a twitched movement. She didn't know if it was her that screamed, or just another girl being horribly murdered, but a bloodcurdling scream tore through the air as the pain hit her like an oncoming bus.

Where was everyone? Were they dead? She couldn't tell, she couldn't see; her vision was blurred at the edges and she could no longer see much of anything. The world was beginning to tint red, and all she could see now was a chiropterean Nathan, revelling in her agony as shadows seemed to burst like fireworks at the edge of her sight. A tear ran down her cheek, and melded with the blood strewn across her face as things grew less and less real to her mind, the world seeming to have a dreamlike consistency.

Gradually, the agonizing pain dulled to an ache, and the rest of her senses lost all distinction. She may as well have been at home in bed daydreaming, for all her surroundings were to her now. She could no longer tell the difference between this hell and the safety of home. Saya blinked another tear out of her glassy brown eyes, staring defeatedly at Nathan before she finally lost what was left of her conciousness and her head fell limply against her pierced chest. But Saya was no longer there.

Nathan brought his face closer to examine her state: she was barely breathing, half-alive. He smiled wider, displaying viciously curved canines, and let out a roar of victory, answered by his mules throughout the battlefield- he could tell they were enjoying the bloodfest, their lust to kill being satisfied beyond any dreams their miniscule minds had ever been capable of imagining. Nathan was never satisfied, just... pacified, if you will. Never quite done the job; always wanting to stop one more heart. He never wanted to stop killing, he just liked to wait a little longer and see if he could cause the victim any more pain, just a bit more. That made his temporary refrain from murdering a little sweeter.

Seeing the ghost of the pain he'd inflicted echo in their lifeless eyes as they fell to the ground was what he lived for. And, as usual, Nathan decided to wait, to see whether she would live or not. He wrenched his arm from her chest, and she fell to the ground like a crimson rag doll. She was now drenched in not only the bood of chiroptereans she'd killed, but also in her own, still flowing freely out of the open wounds. Nathan blinked, and sat down to wait for her to catch up.

Slumped on the ground at the bottom of a wall of jagged rock, Saya Otanashi was in limbo between life and death and at the mercy of an ancient chiropterean. Nathan smiled again, and shifted his postion to better observe the red queen as she laid at his feet, utterly helpless.

White... everything was so bleached white. It was blinding, and Saya found she had to close her eyes again and retreat to the cool blackness beneath her eyelids. The floor was hard, smoothe as glass, and there seemed to be no temperature to the atmosphere. She tried to remember what had just happened, frowning slightly as she tested her limbs, stretching a little. Such a quiet, peaceful place had suddenly wiped away her most recent thoughts, but in the back of her mind, a part of her still remembered the battle. Something that also screamed at her not to try and bring it to mind, to shove it away.

But it tempted her natural curiosity, and after a few moments of thinking that seemed to take more effort than usual, she got her wish, and Nathan's face seemed to flash before her closed eyes. She nearly screamed but gasped instead, her eyes opening wide as she clapped a closed fist to her chest and curled up to protect herself like a wounded animal. The white hit her eyes in full force again, and she blinked multiple times, trying to recapture her normally clear vision.

However, even after her eyes felt normal again, the area that surrounded her remained nothing more than a vast, endless white space. She did and did not want to cry out; Yes, she wanted help. She wanted comfort and safety. But what could be out here, in this nonsensical, seemingly endless void of snowy white? She blinked, and her breath caught in her throat due to shock. Apparently, her eyes had only felt normal, because she could see a figure drawing closer. She could define it only as a blur of colors.

Saya began to crawl away, untrusting of this unfarmiliar place. The thoughts of what it might be were nothing short of terrifying, and the options were endless. Torture.

"Stay away from me!"

She cried brokenly, crawling away from the vague shadow in a sideways position and kicking out her legs to gain more distance. Her voice was on the verge of cracking up, her eyes watering and blurring her vision even more. The shape grew even closer, perhaps near enough even to reach out and touch her leg. As it drew nearer, she came closer to tears, fearful of this place: what if she was in a lab somewhere, under the influence of medication that was affecting her vision?

A test subject, locked away from the rest of the world. Kept like a caged animal, to be abused and tested relentlessly- and to eventually die without the knowlege of those she loved, to be thrown in a pile of carcasses with no tombstone to mark where she lied. No supposed 'peace'. However, she'd be going to hell anyway: for killing so many innocents, wouldn't she?

But as the shadowy black figure bent swiftly to her side, she could make the distinction it was human, it's face now level with her own. A figure dressed in... black? Where was the white lab coat, the goggles and the mask? The heavy breathing and the syringe?

"You're safe here, Saya. No one will hurt you." She knew that voice. She knew who it was without even having to think twice. Her vision cleared slightly due to the tears she let fall, and a beloved face she knew so well was beside her for the first time in a very, very long time. 32 years, to be precise. "Haji!" She sobbed, throwing herself at him and pressing her face into the hallow between his neck his shoulder. "Oh, Haji..." Saya whispered, her words hard to speak owing to the large lump in her throat.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, her whole body shaking. She felt his arms wrap around her as well, one of his hands reaching up to stroke her hair. It was as if he might have been alive. How could this be happening? She didn't want to think about it. It didn't matter if it was a horrendous, cruel dream; she just wanted to think about the fact that she could feel his presence, nothing else. This was bliss, no matter how fleeting.

"I've missed you, Saya." He whispered, hugging her just a bit tighter. She sniffed, leaning back to meet his eyes. The tears continued running down her face, and she smiled slightly, her happiness at seeing him again beyond words. She loved him, and she knew it. They both knew it. "I've missed you, too." She said, slowly bringing her face closer to his as the air seemed to grow warm. He brought his hand from the back of her head to her cheek, and it truly was just the two of them in the middle of nowhere (where was nowhere? If it existed... this truly was the perfect example). They closed their eyes slowly, only blinking at first, and their embrace tightened as it had the second time their lips met in that fateful schooolroom, his hair falling in her face.

When she pulled away, it wasn't far. Their noses were still brushing, and they explored each other's eyes. Another tear ran down Saya's cheek, although she no longer felt alone or broken. How could she, when something like this seemed to be happening? Haji's eyes smiled at her, but something was wrong. There was an element of sadness there, like he had to try to be happy. This wasn't as perfect as it seemed.

She loosened her arms around his neck and leaned back fully, still loosely gripping the back of his neck with both hands, weaving her fingers through his hair. She examined Haji's face and expression, her eyes skeptical.

"Something's wrong, Haji... tell me." She implored him, cocking her head to the side and temporarily forgetting the battle, along with the rest of her worries. It was all him right now- she only just had him back, after all. He, and he alone, had her attention right now. As long as he was unhappy, she could never truly be happy either.

"Nothing is wrong, Saya. We just... don't have very much time."

He said, most of the smile fading from his eyes and leaving only the ghost of his previous emotion. Confusion replaced skepticism on Saya's face, and she removed a hand from around his neck, gently placing a hand on his. "Time? Where are we, Haji?" He looked down at their hands, and wove his fingers through hers.

It was then that she realized the hand she held should have been that of a monsters, that of a chiroptereans. But it was human: identical to his other hand, still on her arm. The same slim fingers and pale skin tone... what was this place? Would it change her, too? Haji looked up and took his hand from her arm, taking her face firmly in his hand and turning her view from his other hand, still intertwined with hers. The one that should have been monsterlike.

"Saya, I'm deceased. I died 32 years ago, when a wall collapsed in on me. You saw it with your own eyes, and you're not where you should be. You're in limbo, Saya, and I'm here to help you make your decision." The confusion intensified on her features, and she spoke again.

"My decision?"

What could he possibly mean? Clearly Haji must have survived somehow, or she she wouldn't be talking to him, touching his hand. His eyes locked on hers, freezing them in place.

"Whether you choose to live or not."

He said solemnly, and the smaller hand tightened on the larger one in that endless white void. "You mean... I have to choose between staying with you, or going back to Kai and my nieces?" She said, varying tones of hysterical apprehension ringing in her voice. "You have to choose whether you will live or die, Saya. And in doing so, you must either leave your neices to fight Nathan and his allies alone, or help them... and if you do that, I'm afraid you won't see me again for a very long time." So this wonderful event did have a catch, something that would tear away at seeing him again. Why did everything have to be so complicated, so hard to figure out and decide?.. There was only one question left to ask.

"How much time do I have?" She said, her voice sounding braver than she felt. Haji leaned closer, wrapping her in a one-armed hug and leaving their entertwined hands on the floor. He put his mouth next to her ear before he whispered his answer.

"30 minutes."

And he squeezed her hand back.