This is a little ditty based around the upcoming episode and the promo we lucky people have received :) Anything in the promo is fair game and the rest is just wishful thinking ;)
A HUGE thank you to my lovely eitoph who beta'd this with care and gave me the confidence boost I needed to post :) You're a legend :)
Disclaimer: I don't own Bones, I don't own Red Bull and I don't own Road Runner, yet they all appear in this story...amazing how fanfic works, hey? Lol
Missing Moments and Catching Fire
He's half sitting half lying down on the couch. A beer bottle swings in his hand from left to right and then to his lips where he takes a long pull, relishing in the hot fizz of the icy bubbles prickling down his throat. The TV blares in silence in front of him, not even attempting to distract him from his thoughts which are beating around in his brain like Road Runner on Red Bull.
He can't even remember why he let things get so out of hand. He didn't think a fling in Afghanistan would turn into the most committed relationship he'd had since meeting Doctor Temperance Brennan. He didn't think that said Doctor would ever be open enough to admit to her feelings. And most of all, he never thought it was possible to be in love with two separate people...at one very turbulent time.
He takes another swig from his near empty bottle and sighs a heavy sigh.
His eyes dart to the clock, midnight.
She steps a bare foot through the open door and he's proud to see that she's holding one of her 3-inch stiletto's in her hand, ready to use as a weapon in the unlikely case a mass murderer is just sitting on the couch, "What are you still doing up?"
He sits up a little straighter out of respect. He's going to be a tall man, a brave man when he breaks her heart, "Just thinking."
She sets down her work gear, takes off her other shoe with a slight tilt to her head and steps closer, "Good conversations never start like this."
He doesn't reassure her.
"Bones, she has feelings for me."
Hannah is confused for a moment, "Oh..."
"The kind of feelings I once had for her."
Her tone deepens in understanding, and she sits down on the couch, a safe distance away from her boyfriend, "Oh."
The TV offers a distraction now as they stare ahead at it...neither one really taking in what they're seeing. Booth distantly wonders what conversation the two actors are having when he decides to speak again, "I love you."
She blinks and tries to read between the lines of his 3 word sentence, she finds no lie hidden in there, "I know you do."
And perhaps it's because he's not lying when he tells her this that it makes it harder to say what he needs to say next, "I love her too."
Hannah's head turns from the TV to face him finally, stare him in the eyes. She hears no lie in this statement either.
And that confuses her.
"You can't love two people at once."
He reaches out to stroke her face and feels the beginnings of tears pooling in his eyes.
This is goodbye.
"I'll, uh, I'll take the couch tonight; you can have the bed."
She nods, not letting him see the tears in her own eyes, and stands up. Gathering her things, she doesn't make eye contact with him, and as she moves towards the bedroom, she doesn't look back. It's only when she's behind the safety of his heavy wood door that she starts to cry, pulling out the paperwork that would renew her contract here in DC she feels confused by the turn of events. She thought she was ready to settle down, but as she looks at her three bags which were never really unpacked, she realises she was always ready to move on.
With resolve, she tears apart the contract. She has a week left in the nation's capital and her main objective is avoiding Temperance Brennan.
"I insist on knowing why you're avoiding me."
Brennan and Hannah walk the Mall together at a quick pace. It is the first time in days that either woman has had any contact with the other, despite Brennan calling the blonde half a dozen times in an attempt to meet.
It had taken three very long and painful days after her admission to Booth before she began to feel normal again. She had begun to accept his answer and although she was sure what she was feeling was a mix between rage and jealousy towards her partner's girlfriend, she had started to put it behind her and realise that if Hannah was becoming a permanent fixture in their lives, she would just have to chew the bullet (she was sure that was the right way to say it) and get to know her a little better.
Hannah clearly had other ideas though.
"Temperance, I'm not avoiding you."
She's almost jogging to keep up with Hannah's quick strides, she reaches out to touch her shoulder, effectively pulling her around as she finally catches up and faces her, "Please, don't lie. You have ignored my calls for the last week, the last of which I personally saw you hang up on. What have I done?"
She has never had to beg in her life. Things don't ever get to that point as she usually logics her way in and out of any situation, but this...this has gotten to her. She's unsure in her own mind about why she needs to talk with Hannah so much, perhaps it's jealousy, perhaps it's keeping her enemies closer than her friends, perhaps it's the pure selfish pleasure knowing that she's still involved in Booth's life, even if it is through his girlfriend, but whatever it is, she knows she has to be Hannah's friend. If only the blonde would let her.
Hannah looks into Brennan's eyes and sees only hurt and confusion. She knows that it was never this woman's intention to hurt her, but she can't help but feel angry at her. With a small sigh and a shrug she explains her motives for her ignorance, "I found out about you and Seeley. The first case you worked, last year, what you said to him the other week..."
She couldn't hear any more, "He told you?"
She nods, "Yeah, the other night as I was packing up my things."
Brennan may not be the most intuitive person, but she knows what Hannah means when she says that she was packing, "Oh, I am so sorry, Hannah. If I had known, I never would have..."
She holds up a hand, a small smile on her face, "I could see it the second I stepped foot here. I could see it from the beginning and I chose to ignore it because..." she searches for the right way to describe it, "Because it's like Jacob Allen all over again."
"My first love. He was the guy I thought I could save, he ended up in jail on our 2 year anniversary for a whole raft of things I never even knew he'd been doing. Seeley's different though, he can be saved, if that's what you want to call it, but he already has his saviour, he never needed another one."
It's a quiet moment between the two women, a lot is processed and in the end they just hug each other and continue walking in their separate directions knowing that this time they may never see each other again.
He groans in frustration as he drops another beer bottle to the floor with a thud and a sloshing sound of warm liquid rolling around and splashing just out of the hold of the glass. He groans because up until that morning there had been a table to drop his empty bottle onto, but in a confused fit of rage that was only tainted with a little clumsiness he had knocked it over and broken one of the legs. He groans because he feels like all he can do is leave a trail of broken things (hearts, tables) in his wake. And most of all he groans because sitting on the couch with a beer watching TV with the mute function on seems to be becoming one of his lonely traditions.
He rolls his way off the couch and mops up his mess with a tea towel. He flicks off the TV and starts to walk towards his bedroom. He finally changed the sheets this morning and he feels like it might be normal to sleep in his own room again.
Halfway down the hallway he pauses, listening carefully.
The soft knock continues on his door.
He knows she'd call it illogical, but he can tell just by the calmness of the beat exactly who it is. Hannah was full of a loud energy which reverberated in her knocks which, before she moved in, often shook him from his violent nightmares with a pounding heart and his hand reaching for his gun. Her knocks though, Bones' knocks were filled with the same quiet energy she fed out to the world; the kind of energy which brings a smile to your face without ever knowing where the feeling came from. That's what Bones' knocks were filled with.
He opens the door and is greeted however, with a not so smiley Brennan.
"You know what? I have tormented over this all night, Booth! All night!" She backs him up against the wall with an emotional force, closing the door behind her. It's crazy, but even in her anger he can see the good energy flowing off her in waves. "I don't know what to believe from you anymore. It's like you have a whole set of rules for me and a completely different set for you!"
Taking a moment away from being completely wound up in the fact that she is in his apartment again, just like old times, he realises he was honestly confused by her words, "What are you talking about, Bones?"
"What goes on between us should just be ours, Booth!" Finally stepping back, she looks him in the eye as her voice cracks, "You told her everything."
And he knows.
"I'm so sorry, Bones." And he truly is, "I only told her a few things. She deserved some answers after everything."
She nods, still mad but calming down; she knows in her heart that that's not the real reason for her anguish.
"I'm sorry for what happened, Booth. Neither one of you deserves the pain."
He nods in acceptance and they stand there for a while. The darkness hides all but their shadows from each other, but he can tell by her movements that she is trying very hard not to cry. He steps towards her, unsure of what constitutes personal space between them anymore. When she doesn't shudder when he's within an arm's reach he reaches out to pull her towards him and into his chest.
"I don't want us to miss another moment."
He holds her tighter, "We won't."
She wraps her arms around him, "How can you know?"
"Because," he reaches under her chin and directs her mouth to his, parting her lips just slightly with his soft breath, "This is it."