This is a tag to 1x12, wherein Derrick steals a very expensive skateboard from Jay (who is his aunt's friend and lives with them. He's family) and blames it on Danny(the son of the woman Jay is going out with). Some of the dialog is quoted from the episode. Please read and review- just no flames!


Derrick pulled the packages of wheels out of his backpack, and pushed them into Jay's hands.

"It wasn't Danny. I lied to you and I lied to Aunt Ava about everything. I took the skateboard." His words were forceful, as if he needed to enunciate every syllable of his confession for it to be accepted. He then stared at his shoes, not wanting to see the disappointment that was sure to be on Jay's face.

It took a moment before Jay was able to speak again. That moment felt like an eon in Derrick's mind, as he waited for the yelling to begin. Instead he was met with a calm cadence. "Why Derrick? That is all I want to know, why."

Derrick glanced up to see the man he saw a cross between a dad and an uncle, the man he looked up to, shaking his head in disbelief. Something inside of him snapped at that moment, and the anger he was feeling to Jay roared to the surface.

"I just wanted to make Danny like me! It's just a skateboard, and you gave that helmet to Danny for free! And you've been spending so much time with Danny, and it's just not fair!"

"Derrick, you know I gave that helmet to him as a gift! And it's not just a skateboard. It's a 300 dollar skateboard that you thought you could just leave with! You know that's stealing! Come with me!" With that, he closed the door and put up the lunch sign, then stormed into the back room. It was chalk full of merchandise, but also had a small table for lunches. Derrick followed at his heels, hands stuffed into his pockets, feet shuffling on the tile. He led him to that table, and positioned himself on the hard metal chair, taking Derricks shoulders and holding him out in front of him.

"Derrick, I want you to know that yeah- I like Danny, because he's a cool kid, but what I really need you to know is that I love you. I get it that I haven't been spending as much time with you as I used to, but you have to know that it isn't because I love you any less. I could never love you any less. You're like a son to me Derrick, and that's why I also need you to know that you cannot react to jealousy like you did. You should have come and talked to me, not taken a skateboard and pawned it off to Danny. And as soon as you did it, you should have come to me and confessed, not let Danny take the blame. You know that stealing is illegal, and I can't let that go Derrick, which is why I am going to spank you."

At the last words, Derricks eyes flew from their fixation on the ground to look at Jay wide eyed. He shook his head frantically stuttering "No way. No way."

Jay nodded in response, and said "Yes way Derrick. You need to learn that you can't do things like this. So yes, I am going to spank you, and this will go a lot easier if you don't fight me." With that, Jay folded Derrick over his lap, and once in position, lifted his hand in the air and brought it down hard. He began to lecture.

SWAT "You do not" SWAT "steal" SWAT "I get that" SWAT "you were jealous." SWAT "but that does not" SWAT "give you the right "SWAT "to take what" SWAT "doesn't belong to you." SWAT "You do not" SWAT "put the blame on" SWAT "other people." SWAT "you do not" SWAT "lie to me or your aunt" SWAT "ever."

The swats continued to rain down on his khaki clad bottom. Derrick had begun squirming early on, and on was already crying as Jay finished his lecture. At those last words, he fell slack over Jay's lap, and started sobbing, saying "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Jay." Jay took those words as a signal that his job was done, and with 2 last swats, finished up, pulling the teary Derrick into his arms in a hug. Eventually, his tears subsided, and he pulled back from his place buried in Jay's shoulder, again fixating on the floor.

Jay sighed, and lifted Derrick off of his lap. He pulled his face up to meet his, and spoke softly "In my book, you're good now, okay. But that doesn't mean you don't have to face whatever punishments your Aunt Ava gives out. Okay."

Derrick nodded, still looking a bit shame faced. Then his eyes widened, and he spoke hurriedly. "Does that mean you're going to tell Aunt Ava about this!"

Jay's mouth came up a bit against his will and he said "I'm not going to lie to your Aunt about this Derrick. She deserves to know. Besides, it might lighten your sentence a little."

Derrick sighed and nodded.

"Okay buddy, now you just have to fess up to your Aunt."

The groan that Derrick emitted could be heard throughout the continental US.