How To Get Rid Of A Pedophile For Dummies.

Hello there ! I'm Allen Walker. Pleased to make your acquaintance. And you are ?

I'm here to give you a lesson in how to get rid of a pedophile. Don't mind the title part that says ' for dummies .' It's just for show.

Anyway, my lesson is actually based on a true event. Me, being stalked by that horrible Tyki Mikk. I'm starting to feel sick now...

I'll continue for the sake of you lovely readers. So.

Step One.

You need to know if you actually have a pedo after you.

Don't aim it at young little children. Aim it at older people. So if you think a old little lady is constantly following you everywhere and you think she might be thinking of doing very unsavory things to you, run away. FAST. And make sure for your safety to yell as loud as you can," Pedo on the loose ! Call 999 ! "

Remember, at the TOP of your lungs !

I didn't scream for my life and uhhhhh...

Alright, to recap. If you suspect you have a pedo after you, run for your life and scream as loud as you capacious lungs will allow.

Sighing off,

Allen Walker.