Nervously, he glanced at Nowaki. He didn't really feel up to doing this, but neither did he want his lover to go out and murder the culprits. Not because they didn't deserve it, but because Nowaki could be persecuted for doing so as two wrongs never made a right. Not since feudal times anyway where it was an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.
He felt slightly comforted, by the gentle squeeze on his shoulder from Nowaki's hand as he was called in to see the doctor who'd seen him after that horrific incident.
"Kamijou-kun, I'm glad to see you." She looked up at Nowaki, "And who might you be?"
Nowaki, without hesitation, wrapped his arms around Hiroki, "I'm Hiro-san's lover."
Embarrassed, Hiroki hissed out between his teeth, "Nowaki!"
The doctor giggled, smiling softly at the pair of them. "Don't worry, I wont tell anyone."
Glancing at her clipboard, she asked, "No, Kamijou-kun, what is the reason for your visit?"
Uncomfortably, he shifted one foot and the other about, gazing at the floor. This wasn't something he liked to talk about, even if these two knew all about what had happened to him.
"I'd... like a copy of the files from before."
"You've finally decided to press charges, Kamijou-kun?"
He nodded, "Yes."
"Good for you! There are not many men who have the courage to stand up for themselves when it comes to cases like this. So many aren't reported, but if they were I would hope it would help the real numbers to go down. It's the same for women. Not everyone reports being raped and even fewer prosecute."
Hiroki felt flush and leaned back against Nowaki, trembling in his embrace.
This was more difficult than he'd thought it'd be, but what Nowaki had mentioned before, kept him determined to see this through. He'd hate to think, that because of him and his damn pride, that someone else might be targeted by the scumbags who'd violated him.
'If not for Nowaki, I don't think I would ever have believed that I too, wasn't somehow at fault.
Is it possible, to love him more than I already do, to love him so much that I cannot any longer possibly contemplate a life without him in it?'
The year Nowaki had been away from him, had been a disaster, but now that they were together again, he could not bare to be parted from him.
The doctor turned to leave the room. "I'll return soon with the files you need. If there's anything beyond that, that I can do for you, please let me know."
Once the doctor had left and closed the door, Nowaki turned him around and leaned down to brush a kiss over his brow.
"After this, we'll go to a law office."
"I don't think I'll really be able to afford a lawyer."
"Didn't your childhood friend, Usami-sensei attend Teito University for Law?"
Hiroki blinked, "He did, but, he never became a lawyer."
"So, he never passed the bar?"
"Well... he did, but he's not a practicing lawyer. He's an author instead."
"Still, we could ask him, couldn't we?"
Hiroki's brows furrowed as he scowled, "No! He doesn't have to know about this."
However, when Nowaki pointed out, "But Hiro-san, a case like this, even if we try to keep it from the media, it has a way of leaking out."
Gentle hands caressed his cheeks, forcing him to look up into the worried, but loving ocean blue eyes that always cut him to the quick.
"This is not the time to allow pride to get in the way Hiro-san. Until they have been put behind bars, I don't think you'll be able to be your usual self. Neither of us will be at ease, not until charges have been pressed against them. Not until the world realizes, that a man can suffer so and be able to do something about it, without ridicule."
Hiroki felt his eyes beginning to water, "It's just... so difficult Nowaki."
The tender touch of firm loving lips pressing against his own, somehow managed to give him strength to continue with their plans.
"I know, Hiro-san, but you are a man filled with pride. So, if you pride yourself on anything, pride yourself on being one of the few who wont back down and allow them to hurt you. Think of this as a challenge for yourself and the good of society. Let them know that there are monsters lurking, not only in the dark or in the shadows, but also in plane sight."
He realized Nowaki was trying to encourage him, to lend strength to him. He just didn't know how far it would take him. Yet as long as his lover were there to stand beside him, he had strength aplenty to carry on.
Weakly, he rest his forehead against Nowaki's shoulder. "You know me far too well."
"Is that not because I love you so much Hiro-san, that above all things in this world, you are what is important to me. More important than even myself?"
Hiroki continued to hide his face from Nowaki's view, against the taller mans shoulder. He hadn't thought it was possible to love Nowaki anymore than he already did. But every day, every moment like the one they were sharing had him loving him even more than before.
'At this rate, I'll never be able to live without him. And I don't want to. Without Nowaki... it wouldn't work, because it has to be him. No one else will do, because I'll never love like this again.'
Just when he was tilting his head back to speak, the doctor walked in and giggled.
"I'm sorry, was I interrupting something?"
Quickly, Hiroki turned, his face as red as a beet, "No, you weren't interrupting anything."
Nowaki, behind him, just smiled, watching him with adoring eyes.
The doctor clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth, "Well, that's too bad then. I love seeing two people so madly in love with each other, that they don't mind showing it even in a doctors examination room."
What Nowaki said next had Hiroki wanting to find something to pick up and throw at him!
"As a doctor in training, if I weren't going for pediatrics, I'd have liked to be able to be a doctor that could give Hiro-san a full physical."
The doctor's eyes widened and she smiled, "As long as you're both consenting adults, I see no harm in you playing that out back home. You don't need to be a real doctor to play doctor and patient, or doctor and nurse."
Nowaki's eyes seemed to sparkle, or maybe it was only his imagination.
The only thought which crossed his mind, was that this woman was a pervert and that Nowaki was an idiot!
He blinked when a folder was presented to him, held out by the doctor.
"This is the documentation of your assault. I wrote down everything you told me. This includes your emotions at the time as well as the pictures I had to take to place them on file in case they were ever needed for evidence."
With trembling fingers, Hiroki took the offered folder and bowed to the doctor. "Thank you."
Nowaki too, bowed and thanked the woman.
Nowaki held out his hand to Hiroki, "Hiro-san, why don't you let me hold onto that for you, so you don't drop them."
He'd been about to snap, 'No,' but refrained as he noticed himself how shaken up he was. Were the folder to fall, the contents might spill out for anyone to see. So, reluctantly, he handed the folder to Nowaki.
As they got into their rental car, which Nowaki had insisted on, he felt numbness creeping in on him. The events of that horrific day running again and again through his head.
His heart, felt as though he'd been running a marathon after a bout of anemia.
His breathing became labored, his fingers digging into his knees.
Tears blurred his vision just as they arrived at Akihiko's apartment.
Nowaki turned to look at Hiroki and noticing he was entering into a panic attack, he had no choice but to slap him.
Hiroki blinked, gasping as he lifted a hand to his cheek and glared at Nowaki.
"What the hell was that for you asshole!?"
Nowaki exhaled slowly and explained, "You were becoming hysterical Hiro-san. That state of mind is dangerous. I did not wish to hurt you, because that is the last thing I would ever want to do. I'm sorry that I had to hit you, but I cannot be sorry that I did, least you should have hurt yourself. People have been known to go into cardiac arrest, because of these kinds of attacks as they raise their blood pressure. I hope you'll forgive me, Hiro-san."
Hiroki glowered as he lowered his gaze to the large hand which now rested on his thigh.
"No, I'm sorry. You're only trying to protect me. I was just startled. You've never hit me before, but you wouldn't do so unless it was important." Beside's, Nowaki often took his abuse. That was something he had to stop, because he didn't want to ever lose him. He was amazed that Nowaki had put up with it for so long and still did.
Nowaki smiled softly at him and undid his seat belt before getting out to help him out of the car.
"I'll be sure to make it up to you later, Hiro-san."
It was not Akihiko who answered the door, but one familiar green eyed youth.
Hiroki blinked, wondering what one of his students was doing there.
Superstitiously, he glanced at the address, but there was no mistaking the place, it was Akihiko's dwelling.
Misaki seeing him, gasped and was about to slam the door in their faces, when a shirtless silver haired man came up behind him.
Hiroki watched as Akihiko placed an arm around Misaki's waist.
"Who is it Misaki?"
Hiroki frowned, but when Akihiko looked up from staring down at the young man, Akihiko stared at him.