the day they brought
your body

I didn't hear the sky being torn apart
I didn't hear them whisper some worthless spells
I didn't hear my mind breaking
I didn't hear the silence rip my heart out

I didn't see your naked throat sliced from ear to ear
I didn't see my name written on your cheeks with the
cheapest biro I've ever seen
I didn't see your eyelids purple from the blows
I didn't see your broken legs and just a shred of a dirty rug covering
what laid between them

I didn't feel the smell of gunpowder on their uniforms
the last tingling remains of your perfumes
on my scarf
gasoline someone burned your hair to the skin with
flowers I'd bought you the previous evening

I didn't feel the taste of droplets of tea I had been sipping
since you had gone out
I didn't taste fear and disbelief crawling underneath my skin
I couldn't taste dust slowly falling onto my opened lips
I didn't taste the air heavy with blood oozing from every

I just screamed screamed screamed
until the whole
world darkened enough for me to see your eyes

those lovely little things I had kissed myself that night