Word Count: 2,123

Rating: PG-13

Character(s)/Pairing(s): Kato and Britt; Kato/Britt

Warnings: Swearing (I blame Britt), male on male kissing, the word penis (no sexings, sorry)

Summary: Britt is determined to give Kato a name… but he's distracted and oddly thoughtful.

Colored Animals

"C'mon, man, don't be so lame."

"Lame?" At the pointed look from the small – disarmingly so – Chinese man behind the wheel, the man just had to grin. He slid a finger around the rim of his old-fashioned Fedora in a way he'd seen done in tons of classic movies. He may not have been a man to read, but he was certainly one to watch a good film or two, even if some of them were in black and white and didn't have super awesome explosions. As far as Britt Reid was concerned, he could see plenty of super awesome explosions every night if he wanted. And his sense of adventure, previously locked into a life of non-stop partying, said want.

"Yeah. Lame."

"I am not."

"I hate it to admit it – alright, I don't hate it, but you are right now, my friend."

The man rolled his eyes a moment before their gorgeous car crashed into the side of a building. Without so much as a dent in it, too. The passenger patted the dash fondly. The Black Beauty definitely lived up to her name and, when thugs with guns appeared out of the cloud and debris, furious at the loss of their lab, he watched for a moment when the driver lived up to his – not that he technically had one. They were all down in seconds, even before the passenger could unlatch his goddamn stupid seatbelt that got stuck god damn it!

When the driver slipped back in, he waited patiently for the passenger to roll down the window and toss down a card adorning a green-tinted hornet and an e-mail address. A simple design, yes, but attractive – no attention-getting. It was just another of the driver's million talents.

Art, kicking ass, mechanics, kicking ass, coffee, kicking ass… There was almost nothing Kato couldn't do. So what the hell should he be called? Blue Wombat had been turned down, as had the rather inspired Red Hippopotamus. Who cared if hippos weren't red? Hornets weren't green.

"Great job, Orange Orangutan."

That earned a more pointed look than being called lame had, so the masked do-gooder leaned back, looking thoughtful. "Okay. Yellow Turkey."

"That is worse."

"Okay, so we like orange. Orange Turtle."

"Turtle? Now you are just being stupid."

"I am not being stupid, Kato. You just don't appreciate my brilliance. Orange Octopus."

"I am not an octopus."

"Oh, c'mon!" He looked serious a moment. "Mess with the Octopus and you'll get inked." Instantly, the broad grin was back. "Right? How was that? Awesome. Yeah."

"No. That was lame."

"You're 'rame,'" he muttered, taunting his partner's accent. "How about the Green Apple? No, wait, I'm green."

"And that is a fruit."

"Right, I know. It was a play on… Never mind. The Turquoise Gorilla."

The suggestions continued until they ended up at the large mansion that had once belonged to Britt's father. Now it was the hideout of the Green Hornet and his partner… driver… Whatever people wanted to call him. Though Britt had certainly turned his father's – no his paper – in the direction of calling Kato his unnamed, silent partner. Partner in crime, of course. As far as the city of Los Angeles was concerned, the Green Hornet was a bad guy. It didn't matter that crime had actually been receding in the past few months of operation. No one seemed to notice that, not even the freaking bad guys! It thrilled Britt. His impromptu plan to essentially become superheroes by posing as supervillains was going brilliantly. If Kato occasionally voiced the belief that it was going a little too well, he brushed it off. His street senses were just on overdrive and, since the night they'd killed the D.A. and Britt had gotten shot, and Lenore had learned of their true identities… Well, since then, everything had been going pretty smoothly.

It was proving a bit difficult to shut down the drug suppliers and hookers – jesus, hookers – and gangs that they were slowly winning control over, though. But Britt took that, like he did anything else, in stride. Everything would be just fine. They just had to keep taking Lenore's advice and they just had to keep kicking ass.

Well, Kato just had to keep kicking ass. Britt helped, certainly and after Kato had nearly been shot in the head… That had him pausing. The hat he'd been about to toss casually onto the table was instead held, his fingers running over the edge. He never thought about Kato nearly getting shot… That double-barreled gun being pointed to his helpless partner's face across the dark room… Something had snapped in him when he'd seen that and, at the same time, something had clicked. Time had slowed. And Britt had managed to come to his partner's aid…

Jesus, he couldn't imagine a world without Kato in it! The guy was everything to him. That thought brought on even more troubling one's – like the fact that he'd stopped admiring Lenore's legs and had started admiring her brain… And how he would get jealous if Lenore and Kato went somewhere. Not because Lenore was going with Kato… but because Kato was going with Lenore.

Britt frowned down at his hat. But that was crazy – it was stupid… It was… it was fucked up. There was no way. He just wanted to go out and have a good time was all. And if it was weird that when Kato wasn't in the house, the place seemed empty, that wasn't too weird. He'd just grown used to the guy.

"What's the matter? Did you run out of stupid suggestions?"

"What?" Britt turned to see Kato still dressed in his all-black suit. He removed the mask, revealing a curious gaze and, quite honestly, a handsome face. Yeah, he was a guy, but didn't chicks notice when other chicks looked good? He could notice when Kato looked good – damn, he was smooth as hell. The hat had been swept off and shot behind him without Kato looking, landing smoothly on the hat rack. His hair was rather messy looking, tousled like someone had run their hands through it. Britt watched Kato do just that and felt as though something big and hot and sticky had lodged itself in his throat.

He cleared it and Kato's curious gaze turned worried. "What's the matter?" he asked again, received a shrug in response while Britt turned away to begin removing the coat and mask that were almost like a second skin to him now.

"Brother, what is the matter?"

Brother. He'd once told Kato that he'd always wanted a brother… And it wasn't a joke; he really wanted one. But in Kato he had so much more than just a brother. He had a… A what? he asked himself. A partner, sure, but… what kind of partner?

Those type of thoughts unsettled him, so he threw a cocky look over his shoulder. "Nothin's the matter. I'm not a girl, Kato, Jesus. I'm thinking."

"Thinking makes you a girl."

"Shut up… Pink Hobgoblin."

"Now you really are just making things up." He went over to a machine hidden within the cupboard and out popped a machine that Britt loved even more than he did the Black Beauty. It freaking made coffee. Britt watched in silent fascination as Kato made two cups in that special way he did… The leaf. Britt smiled, but when his fingers brushed Kato's as he took the offered mug, he jolted and burned himself. It wasn't too bad seeing how his fingers had already been electrocuted when they'd touched Kato's.

"Shit! Fuck! Shit! Ow!" He hopped in place, waving his hand until Kato grabbed him and shoved his hand under warm water. "That's fucking hot! Jesus!"

"Oh, shut up." Kato's voice was a little rougher than it normally was. "You're always hurting yourself or getting into trouble."

"I am not."

Kato sent a searing glance Britt's way and, once their eyes locked, Britt felt… Well, he felt everything. Kato's fingers expertly cleansing his own. The burning sensation was long gone, now replaced by tingles that had nothing to do with hot coffee. Their hips were touching, thighs practically mashed together as they both pressed in front of the sink. Kato's eyes were dark, his hair just a little unkempt, and his mouth was twisted into a scowl.

When had a scowl been so damn… He made a strangled sound. "Black Mouse."

"I like black, but not mouse."

That had been the most agreeable response he'd ever heard and Kato's voice was quiet, their hands still locked under the water. Their fingers had somehow entangled, though, and they were now turned more towards one another than towards the sink. Their faces were close; Britt actually leaned down a bit. "What do you like?"

"Hornets," was the whispered response.

"But that's me."

"Yes, I know…"

Britt didn't know how it happened that his lips were suddenly on the other man's. He didn't know how it happened that suddenly his damp hands were in Kato's hair or that Kato was slipping slick hands beneath Britt's shirt. They were freezing against heated flesh, but Britt found himself pressing into the man rather than pulling back. He let out a ragged breath, dragging the surprisingly willing Kato against him to deepen the kiss.

Hungrily, their lips parted, tongues delved, tastes were consumed. Musky here, warm there – was that brandy? God. With a moan, Britt tore himself away. "Jesus, Kato! Jesus!"

Words were gushing from him at a pace no one could follow. Kato didn't even bother trying, just watching him rant and rave while he kept his hands in the Chinese man's hair, kept his body pressed close. "Why were we just kissing?"

Kato's lips curved. "Why did we stop?"

"Because… Because… It's like incest. We're brothers and stuff, right?" When Kato lifted a brow, Britt realized how close they still were and how much he realized he just wanted to… to… "Jesus, Kato!"

"Your penis is digging into my thigh."

"Jesus, Kato!" It was said a third time as a moan when Kato shifted his leg, rubbed himself over the other man. "What are you doing?"

"Cleverly hiding my surprise that you're hard for me."

"Jesus, I love the way you talk. That accent's fucking amazing." He blinked, tried to step back but his body wasn't listening. "I mean…"

"You mean what you said. Lenore was right about you."

"What?" Kato was still rubbing and, worse, his mouth had found a sensitive spot on his neck. "Kato… Wait, Lenore? What? Stop – don't stop, what the hell? What?" He felt drunk – not a new sensation – but somehow wonderful now when it was Kato's doing.

"She said that you were jealous of her."

"Jealous of… Jesus…" His eyes wanted to roll back into his head. God, Kato had such busy, clever hands… He was slowly becoming unable to breathe.

"You like me," he murmured, nipped.

"I… Yeah… You're a guy."


"I'm not a… I… Never did… God…"

Kato laughed and finally disentangled himself from Britt. His tie was askew, his shirt tugged haphazardly from the waistband of pants that were unzipped and hanging low on his hips… His eyes were heavy and suddenly surprised. "Wha…?"

"You're not gay."

"Well… I…" He ran a hand through his hair, gazing at Kato. "I don't know anymore… I don't know what you did, Kato, but I don't know anymore. I'm supposed to like chicks. I thought you liked chicks."

"No. Lenore told you that she and I never kissed, never did anything. We've always only been friends."

"Wait, you're gay? For real gay?" That brow winged up again, making Britt's heart speed up once again.

"Yes. And?"



Britt nodded, swallowed hard. "Okay. I didn't know that, but okay. You like me?"

"You are being stupid again."

"So you do… I should hit on you."

Kato's lips twitched. "Yes, you should."

"Cool. I'll start." There was silence a moment while Britt straightened himself up. The pants were zipped up, the tie was straightened. He left the shirt untucked, but straightened that as well. He then leaned against the counter and sent Kato a smooth grin. "Pink Panther."

They were back to that…? "Pink Panther is taken."

"Are you?"

Kato was silent a moment. "You are stupid," he decided and walked away.

"What? Kato?" He spun, watched Kato as he walked out and was distracted a moment by how Kato's ass looked in those tight, dark pants. "Ah… Wait! Kato, what the hell?"

"I'm playing hard to get." He stopped at the doorway, sent an amused look over his shoulder. "Do you like it?"

"Do I like…?" Britt's grin was slow, but wide. "Jesus, Kato."

This was fun to write XD

Let me know if you enjoyed it!