Dick Gumshoe: Ace Detective

There is a world. A world where a spiky-headed defense attorney just barely made it though law school. A world where a certain meek officer throws away the Blue Badger's face and begins cuffing criminals. And most important of all: a noodle-loving scruffy detective becomes a legendary kick-ass police detective in the homicide department. This is Dick Gumshoe's story.

The scruffy detective slurped away at his instant noodles as he watched old reruns of Doraemon. He knew it was a kids' show, but isn't everyone just a little kid on the inside?

The telephone rang on the other side of his apartment. Letting out a heavy sigh, the ace detective stood up and set his ramen on the table.

"Hello, pal?" he asked. He was tired because he had to arrest a suspect at the Fey and Co. Law offices the previous night. "What is it?"

"Detective Gumshoe?"

"My voice should be enough to convince you who I am!" he snapped under stress. "I can tell who you are, pal!"

"I'm sorry, sir!" the voice at the other end trembled. "It's just… Mr. Edgeworth requested to see you at his office!"

Gumshoe sighed once more. "Thanks, Meekins. Sorry for snapping."

"I understand, sir!" Gumshoe heard the ringing of a megaphone on the other end. "You have a lot on your plate, Mr. Gumshoe-sir!"

Gumshoe hung up to avoid further ear damage. He tossed on his old green trench-coat and started out the door. He paused, and looked at the ramen on the table. He looked at his watch, then the ramen again. He turned back and placed the ramen in the microwave so he could heat it back up upon getting back home. Even though he was an ace detective, his job still paid peanuts. Inedible peanuts, to be precise.


[September 6, 10:34 PM]


"I'm sorry to call on you so late, Detective," Edgeworth bowed.

"It's no problem, pal," replied the detective. He felt a sharp pain behind his bloodshot eyes, but he ignored it. After all, there was clearly work to be done.

"You're probably wondering what this is about."

"Let me guess," the detective covered his eyes in pain, but continued, "there's another murder. Another suspect. Another client for another defense attorney. And more importantly, another win for you if I do my job right. This is the case concerning the death of that lady; Mia Fey, right?"

"You're getting good at this," Edgeworth picked up a file from his desk. "I may just see to it that you're given another raise, my good detective."

"Don't give me a raise for a predictable outcome, sir," he sighed. "There's no merit in that."

"As good a work ethic as always," Miles acknowledged his friend in the trench-coat. "I'll keep my eyes open for reasons to give you one."

"As expected, sir."

"Anyway," the red-garbed prosecutor opened the file, "it's as you said. The victim is Mia Fey. The autopsy states that the cause of dead was by beating with a blunt object; much like that hollow statue we found."

"I don't envy those forensic scientists," Gumshoe scratched his head. "They have to dissect a corpse to find something to blatantly obvious."

"You can never be sure," Edgeworth wagged his finger, and Gumshoe sighed at the old mannerism. "We determined that no drugs or anesthetics were in the victim's system."

"Have the officers found anything at the scene?"

"Officer Meekins found the phone of the office in an odd state," Edgeworth explained, holding up a sheet of paper and lightly backhanding it. "It had been unscrewed, and a few wires were loose. Being such a hazard, the good officer unplugged it immediately."

"You think it was wiretapped?"

"What else?"

"So why exactly did you call me down here?"

"To give you a case-briefing for your testimony in court tomorrow," Egdeworth replied.

"Hold it!" the detective mimicked Miles' habit of pointing at the objectionable person. "Why haven't I been told of this!"

"You just have been," Edgeworth answered.



Knowing there was no way around the 'overruled' word, the detective sighed.

"So what is there to brief?"

"The caller, Ms. April May, claims to have seen the whole crime unfold. She claims to have seen the victim's sister, Maya Fey, bludgeon her to death."

"I kinda figured that out myself."

"The defense attorney, who will be defending the victim, is a rookie known as Phoenix Wright."

"He was in the room with the victim around the time of death," the detective argued. "If he had the chance to alter the evidence, he isn't eligible to defend the girl."

"This is a fanfiction of a video game, Detective," Edgeworth, once again, wagged his finger. "Logic in that detail doesn't exist here."

"I always forget."

"Since you seem to be aware of the facts, let's get your story straight."

"Edgeworth, sir," the detective said solemnly, "I want you to promise me something."


"Don't go tampering with the evidence, okay? If you get found out…"

"Remember, Detective," the man with the frilly suit countered, "I'm the one who has the most authority over your paycheck."

"…Yes, sir," the detective sat down on the couch below Edgeworth's framed uniform. It was the suit he wore to is first case, and it had extra frills on it.

"I'm so glad we're on the same page."

"If that's the case…" the detective looked up at his superior, "you should know I gave Mr. Wright the first copy of the autopsy."

"That'll be out first attack."

"At least this move won't be illegal."

"The verdict is guilty," Edgeworth gazed out his window with his arms behind his back. "That, I'm sure of."



Author's Note:

Hey, this is Napshot64 here! I hope the first chapter pulled you in enough to the point where you'll keep reading. I promise, as one fanfiction-lover to another, that it only goes uphill from here. Writing court-sequences is my recent specialty, and making Wright look like an idiot is going to be fun!

I was inspired to write this fanfiction when I heard Gumshoe's (orchestrated) theme on Youtube. If you find the right video, you'll see a comment that mentions an alternate universe where Gumshoe kicks ass, and Wright barely passed law school. The username is 'Mastervaati,' but I promise you that's me; an old name I used when I made an account.

One more thing is that I can't make any promises as to deadlines or the length of each chapter. I have to attend school, and I have law classes coming up in a few months, so I'll be busy. I spend most of my free time writing, however, so that doesn't necessarily mean that updates will stop occurring.

So please rate, comment, review, or whatever you do here. I'm new to the site, so I'm not sure how it all works. I hope to see you all in Chapter Two!