Sam's Journal

Entry 1 (Saturday)

Dear... Whatever you put here,

Today my mom bought me a diary! Woo! She says it's gonna help me "Express my feelings" What do i need to express! Diaries are for girls. I like to call my personal book for writing about my boring life! You might call a journal... Well today was pretty boring. I was gonna go over da SHAYS... but they weren't home. Apparently that had to go see a dying cousin third removed in Idaho. Idaho is a stupid state. Why won't that stupid shirtless potato Gibby move to Idaho he would fit perfectly there? Let's send Freddie to the amazon and give him tropical diseases... Oh wait i can't do that his mom has probably given him every shot known to man! Ok hold on i want to eat!

(Few mins later)

Sorry about the grease stains right here - -

Mama loves her meatballs!

Well i hope tomorrows a better day. I'm gonna try a new prank on Freddie. Im gonna put a shock thing on his door so when he opens it. It SHOCKS HM!

Well night c-you tomorrow night diary.

Entry 2: (Sunday)

Dear Journal i don't like writing in,

Well the prank worked. Just not on Freddie. It shocked his mom. I blamed it on Freddie and told Ms. Benson he was trying to protect himself. She then gave him a little more freedom. NOW HE ONLY GETS 1 tick bath a month! He better thank me for doing that! I called Freddie a new name i called him Fredloser. He didn't make a comeback i was wondering why he didn't! He always makes a lame comeback then i beat him up. I still wish i could of beat him up today. Carly told me i shouldn't because Freddie not doing soo well. It's been over 6 months since Freddie dumped Carly after i told he was bacon. Mmm... Bacon brb..!

(1hour later)

Oh sorry i was having my midnight snack! I had like 50 pieces of bacon. Oh i have to remind my mom tomorrow MORE BACON AND HAM AND FAT CAKES AND MEAT!

Well I'm gonna go to bed. I can't be late again... or im gonna get suspended... AGAIN!


PS: Im gonna torture Freddie tomorrow!