Side Effects

Chapter 23

A/N: So wow, I haven't written in awhile.

After picking Brittany up at her house at 6:45 sharp, Santana heads down the road to Breadstix, Brittany's fingers laced with hers over the gear shift. She had of course picked the place, arguing that if she had to sit through this date she better at least get some stix out of it. Brittany hadn't even put up a fight, because I mean who doesn't love Breadstix? Also she was just thankful Santana was going with her. She knew her girlfriend was upset about her mother even if she tried to act as if she weren't. Brittany was hoping that going out on this date would take her mind off of it, because even though Santana acted like it was the end of the world, Brittany knew she'd end up having a good time.

They pull up to the restaurant in minutes, and after putting the car into park, Santana turns to Brittany, "You know what sounds awesome right now?" She asks with a smirk.

The blonde tilts her head to the side and gives Santana a curious gaze, "What?" She asks with amusement.

"Getting some Stix to go, going back to your place, and gettin' our cuddle on." Santana answers with a shrug, her smirk growing. She gives Brittany a look that was a mix of puppy dog eyes, and bedroom eyes, fluttering her eyelashes innocently.

A giggle escapes Brittany's lips, but she gives the brunette a stern look. "Santana, we're going on this date. We already said yes, and we're already here." She explains, making Santana let out a sigh. "Look San," Brittany says softly. "If you really don't want to do this then we don't have to. I think you'll have fun, but I don't want to make you do anything you really don't want to do." She adds, clasping Santana's hand with both of hers.

Another sigh tumbles out of Santana's lips, and she lets out a small groan. "No." She says, closing her eyes and breathing in deeply. "It's fine." She adds, opening her eyes back up to look at Brittany. "I'm just being a bitch." She admits, "If you want to do this, then I want to. I just want you to be happy." She tells her before bringing their hands up to her lips, and places a soft kiss to the back of Brittany's. "Come on." Santana tells her, and turns off the ignition, before stepping out.

Santana moves around the other side of her car, and opens Brittany's door for her. She grabs the blonde's hand and helps her out which earns a giggle from Brittany. Santana smiles back and turns to walk into the restaurant but Brittany pulls her back, colliding their chests together.

The brunette lets out a gasp that gets cut off as Brittany's lips press firmly into hers. Santana moans into the kiss as Brittany's tongue slides into her mouth. Her hands tangle in blonde hair as she feels Brittany's arms tighten around her waist, pulling her even closer.

"I love you." Brittany whispers, pulling away from the Latina, a bright smile on her face.

Santana smiles and places a peck on Brittany's lips, "I love you too." She replies sincerely, before once again attaching their lips. Her arms tighten around Brittany's neck and she feels the blonde's hands sliding dangerously low on her backside.

"Get a room!" Rachel's voice rings out from across the parking lot, before the two girls could get any more heated. Which was probably a good thing, considering they were in the parking lot of Breadstix. They didn't need to give anyone a show, not that Santana minded. They were hot, and she didn't blame people for wanting to look.

Brittany pulls away, much to Santana's dismay, and they both turn their attention towards Rachel and Quinn, who were approaching them with their arms linked together; Rachel clinging to the blonde's arm, like it was her lifeline.

Santana flips them both off and turns her attention back to her girlfriend, fully intending to finish their make-out session, but Brittany giggles and pulls away from her fully. Santana groans, rolling her eyes as she watches Brittany turn her body fully in the direction of the other two girls who stopped in front of them.

The Latina's arms wrap around Brittany's waist and she rests her cheek against the side of Brittany's shoulder. "Hey guys!" Brittany greets, cheerfully.

The other two girls greet Brittany with bright smiles, before turning to Santana and doing the same, but Santana simply brushes them off. She lifts her head from Brittany's arm and places a light kiss against her shoulder. "Can we just go inside? I wants my sticks."

They get seated in a booth, Brittany and Santana on one side and Rachel and Quinn on the other.

Within minutes a blonde waitress approaches them, to take their drink orders. She was a couple inches shorter than Brittany, and had bright green eyes, and freckles, dabbled across her nose, and high cheek bones. Her hair was pulled into a pony tail, because of dress code, with her bangs brushed behind her ear. The girl was probably in her early 20's and absolutely stunning to say the least.

Chewing her bubble gum, obnoxiously, she goes around the table taking drink orders, stopping, to look Santana up and down when she gets to her. Her eyes linger a little longer than they should on the Latina, and she has to snap herself out of a trance, before turning to Brittany with a flushed smile, jotting down the blonde's drink order distractedly.

"I'll have those right out." She says, her eyes moving back over to Santana, as a shy grin spreads across her face.

Santana's eyebrows raise as the woman walks away, and she clears her throat awkwardly. She catches the three pair of eyes on her, and she wriggles in her seat, "What?" She asks uncomfortably.

"That woman was totally checking you out." Rachel just about gasps out, leaning over the table with wide eyes. Quinn simply nods at the statement, one brow raised.

"Whatever." Santana says, brushing it off. She glances over at Brittany, and raises her right arm, to wrap it around Brittany's shoulders. She turns her head and places a soft kiss on the blonde's temple, pulling her even closer to her.

Santana can't help but laugh, from her spot next to Brittany, as she watches Quinn sit back down at the table across from her and Brittany. Quinn places a new plate of pasta in front of Rachel who squeals in delight. The blonde had gone to talk to the manager about getting Rachel another plate of pasta, because the one she'd been given had a stray piece of chicken in it. Santana was pretty sure it had fallen off of one of their plates and onto Rachel's while being carried, but the small Diva refused to eat her food, even after it had been removed.

"What's so funny?" Brittany asks curiously, looking over at her girlfriend.

The brunette stops laughing and bites down on her lip, trying to hold back more laughter she felt trying to escape her throat. She shakes her head vigorously, letting a smirk grace her lips. "Nothing." She replies, waving it off. But Brittany raises a brow at her, and she knows she has to spill, "It's just funny," She says, nodding over towards Quinn, "How whipped she is." Santana explains with another snort. "I mean I was with her for months, and she never did a damn thing I told her." Santana adds with a shrug, and a teasing smile.

A deep scowl forms on Quinn's face, and Rachel places a comforting hand on her girlfriend's knee. "Santana, Quinn is not whipped." Rachel says with a frown. She opens her mouth to further explain, but Quinn cuts her off.

"Fuck you." Quinn growls, throwing a glare in Santana's direction.

Santana simply smiles smugly, "You already did. Multiple times." She says, folding her arms over her chest, giving the blonde a challenging look. Santana feels three pair of eyes on her, and she glances over at Rachel who was glaring at her, before turning her head to Brittany who was glaring harder than anyone, making her shrink back in her seat.

She swallows hard and looks down at the table, but can still feel Brittany's harsh gaze on her. She knew the blonde wouldn't relent until she apologized, so she sighs heavily, her shoulders dropping. "I'm sorry," She mumbles, not lifting her eyes up from the table. She feels a hand on her leg and glances up at Brittany who smiles at her, and nods her head, satisfied.

Fighting off an eyeroll, Santana looks across the table, catching Quinn's eyes. The blonde had a brow raised, and a smirk gracing her pink lips, her head cocked to the side. Santana narrows her eyes at the girl, daring her to voice, what she knew Quinn was wanting to say.

"Not a word Fabray." Santana grits through her teeth, her arms tightening even more around her own chest.

"And you say that I'm whipped?" Quinn asks with a chuckle, clearly not afraid of Santana, and the lasers shooting out of her eyes.

Santana's jaw clenches, and she sits up a little straighter in her seat. "I am not whipped." She says, through gritted teeth. "I just like seeing Brittany happy." She says, trying to justify it.

Brittany smiles brightly, and leans over to Santana. She places her hand under the brunette's chin, turning her face towards her and places a soft kiss on Santana's lips.

Quinn starts gagging from across the table, and Santana simply leans in placing a longer kiss to Brittany's lips, just to annoy the other blonde. "Seriously guys, stop." Quinn says, clearly annoyed, from the other side of the table. Santana pulls back with a smile, giggling at Brittany who was blushing, before looking over at Quinn, who looked pissed. "You guys have been all over each other ever since we got here." She tells them, folding her arms across her chest.

Santana frowns, and reaches for Brittany's hand under the table, "Chill out Quinn. You'd think you would be less of a prude, now that you're gettin' it on a regular basis. I mean the past few weeks, you have been awful." Santana says with a smirk, before taking a bite of her pasta.

The blonde across the table, throws her napkin on top of her plate and stands up abruptly, storming across the room, and into the bathroom. Rachel looks startled and starts to get up to go after her, but Santana stops her. "I'll go." She says, standing up, and gently nudging Rachel back down in her seat.

The brunette gives her a hesitant look, but nods, and lets Santana go after her girlfriend.

Santana walks into the bathroom and sees Quinn leaning up against the sink, her palms pressed down against the porcelain, and her head hanging down. "What the hell is wrong with you?" She asks, letting the door shut behind her, as she walks fully into the room.

Quinn doesn't move, but Santana can see her grip tighten on the sink, "Go away Santana." Quinn mumbles lowly.

Of course, Santana doesn't listen, and only walks closer, "You aren't still like hung up on me are you?" The Latina asks, making Quinn's head yank up.

The blonde lets out a bitter laugh, and shakes her head, "That would mean, I would have actually had to like you. You were just a way to get off." Quinn explains, her eyes moving back down to look inside the white sink.

Santana's eyes widen slightly, but her face grows hard once again, "Wow Quinn. This sex toy, does have feeling y'know." Santana replies, slightly offended by the blonde's harsh words. Sure Santana was never in love with Quinn, but she had liked her, and she thought, Quinn liked her also. And though Santana would never in a million years admit this, she was slightly sensitive.

Quinn let's out a heavy sigh, and turns around, leaning up against the sink with her butt, "I'm sorry." She says seriously. "I didn't mean that." She apologizes, shaking her head. She looks up, meeting Santana's eyes, "I'm just mad, and I'm taking it out on you." She explains.

"What are you mad about?" Santana asks curiously. Sure she liked messing with Quinn, and annoying her, but that was just their relationship. She did care about the blonde and wanted to help her with whatever was bothering her.

Quinn's hands slide up her body, and cover her face. "I don't even know…" She says, with a bitter laugh. "Rachel, I guess." She admits, letting her hands fall from her face.

"Don't you like her?" Santana asks, her brows creasing in confusion.

"Yes." Quinn replies, confusing Santana even more. "That's the problem." She explains. "We broke up the first time, because I was too afraid to be out with her, and didn't really have a reason. She thought I was ashamed of her." Quinn explains, and Santana nods, because, yes, she's heard this information. "I thought, that I could do it this time, but I'm still afraid. She says she doesn't care anymore, but I know she's still disappointed." Quinn adds sadly, shaking her head. "I'm disappointed in myself."

Santana bites down on her lip, and tries thinking of something to say. She'd never really been good at comforting people. She was always the one telling them to just suck it up and deal with it. It also didn't help that she didn't really know what Quinn was going through. Santana had never really been one to hide who she was. She was head bitch at the school and everyone knew she was a lesbian, and also knew better than to say anything about it. She was proud of who she was, and she didn't understand why Quinn was so afraid.

"I'm sorry, I've been a bitch tonight." Quinn apologizes. "I just see you and Brittany together, so open about your love, and it just….I'm jealous." She says with a shrug. "I want that with Rachel, I just…I can't. I'll reach over to hold her hand, but something inside me stops myself, no matter how much I want it." She explains. "I mean, I love her, everything about her, but Santana, you know how everyone else feels about her at school. I'll be a freak. I just can't pull off the slushy look."

"Well, have you talked to Rachel about it?" Santana asks. "I mean, like really talked to her, and explained how you feel."

Quinn nods her head, "Yeah," She says quietly. "She is being patient and says we should just take things slow." She explains, "We're taking things….very, very, very slow." She draws out, nodding her head to emphasize each word, with an eye roll.

"What does that mean?" Santana asks with narrowed eyes. Quinn looks up and gives her a look, and Santana suddenly gets it. "Oh!" She says, before letting out a laugh. "Wait, wait." She says, clutching her stomach with one hand, and holding another out in between her and Quinn, as she tries containing her laughter, "You mean, you haven't gotten into Berry's pants yet?" She asks unbelievingly.

The blonde glares hard at Santana, but shakes her head no. "She thinks we should take it slow this time around. I know it's my fault, and that should make me want to come out even more, but it's still hard. Not even that will push my fears away." Quinn says with a sigh. She looks over at Santana who was still trying to hold back laughter, and a scowl forms on her face, "It's not funny!" She shouts, standing up straight, and turning to face the Latina, who was hunched over, laughing. "It's not all about sex." Quinn tries to say, speaking loudly, to be heard over the laughter, "It's about…about the way we feel towards each other…" She says with a frown. Her tone started out harsh, but soon grew quieter as she knew, everything she was saying, was only fueling Santana's entertainment.

"Let me guess, Berry told you that." Santana says with a snort, calming her laughter ever so slightly to get the words out. She wipes away a few tears with the back of her hand, and stands up straight taking in a few deep breaths calming herself. "Man, you really are whipped." Santana says, shaking her head, an amused smile on her lips.

Quinn lets out a huff, and brushes past the Latina, headed for the door. She'd had enough of Santana. She should have known, the Latina wouldn't help her.

"Quinn, wait." Santana says, grabbing the blonde's wrist. "I'm sorry." Santana says, all traces of laughter gone from her voice.

The blonde turns around hesitantly, meeting Santana's gaze. The brunette was looking at her with sincerity, and it made Quinn's anger deflate. "What do I do?" She asks desperately.

Santana sighs, and bites down on her lip. "I honestly don't know Quinn." Santana says, making Quinn look down in defeat. "I mean, just come out. I'm out, and I'm the most popular girl in school. People don't care if you're gay. You're hot, and powerful, they won't touch you, no matter what you do, or who you date." Santana tells her honestly. "Besides, if they aren't scared you of, they definitely know to be afraid of me." She says with a proud smirk. "I got your back Fabray." She says with a small smile, bumping her hip against Quinn's.

A small smile forms on Quinn's lips, and she shakes her head, letting out a small giggle, "Thank you." She says sincerely.

"My pasta has mushrooms in it." Brittany says with a frown, picking around her food with her fork. She had specifically asked to have the mushrooms taken out of her meal, but there they were, staring up at her, laughing in her face, tainting the rest of the pasta with their flavor.

Rachel takes a bite of her new plate of pasta, and looks over at Brittany, "The waitress kind of sucks." She replies with a slight shrug. Quinn hums in response, glancing over at her empty water glass. The one that had been sitting on the end of the table for 15 minutes now, waiting to be filled up.

"Hey, be nice, I'm sure she's trying." Santana chastises, making them look over at her confused. "I'm just saying…" She says, a little more quiet. She averts her eyes down to her place, and stapes a few pieces of pasta, bringing them to her lips.

Brittany reaches over and squeezes her girlfriend's leg, giving her a warm smile. "I'm going to run to the restroom, before we leave." She informs her girlfriend. She leans over placing a kiss to the girls cheek, before climbing out of the booth.

"I'll go with you." Rachel says, swatting at Quinn to climb out, so she could go with Brittany.

Quinn sits back down and looks across the table at Santana, who was playing with her pasta, "You alright?" She asks, hesitantly.

"Fine." Santana replies, inhaling sharply. She looks up and gives Quinn a smile, "Just having some drama with my mom. It's no big." She says, waving it off.

Truth was, it was a big deal. She couldn't get her mother's words out of her head. She knew that she shouldn't listen to anything the woman says, but she couldn't help but let it get to her.

Quinn nods her head, acknowledging it, "What's new?" She says knowingly. She knew how awful Santana's mother could be sometimes. She'd known Santana for awhile now, and has heard plenty of stories, although the Latina rarely went into detail. Quinn just knew they fought often.

"Did you guys enjoy everything?" The waitress asks, with a smile. Her eyes are glued to Santana, as if she were the only one in the booth.

Quinn opens her mouth to honestly tell the waitress how their meal was, but Santana starts talking first, "Everything was perfect." She answers with a smile. The woman smiles back at her, and hands Santana her check, before handing one to Quinn, and placing one down in Brittany's spot. "I hope you have a great evening, and please come back." She says, before tossing Santana a wink, and walking off to check on another table.

Quinn eyes Santana warily, "Didn't you tell her to put your checks together?" Quinn asks, glancing down at the paper in front of Brittany's plate.

Santana merely shrugs her shoulders, "I guess she forgot. It's not a big deal, I'm still paying for Brittany." She says, grabbing her girlfriend's ticket. She pulls out some cash and places both tickets on one tray with the cash, and tip, before setting it down on the end of the table.

She picks up her copy of the ticket and starts to put it in her purse, when she notices writing on it. Her eyes narrow and she realizes the waitress had written her number down on the ticket.

Santana's eyes widen slightly, and before she can react, she feels Brittany sitting back down in the booth. She quickly stuffs the ticket into her purse and zips it back up, before smiling over at her girlfriend. "You ready to go?" Brittany asks, placing a quick peck on the Latina's lips.

"Let's go." She replies with a nod.

Santana walks into the kitchen and grabs a bottle of orange juice out of the fridge. She had just dropped Brittany off at home. The blonde had wanted Santana to come inside for a little, but Santana had insisted on coming back home. She didn't know what was wrong, but all of a sudden she was feeling off. She loved Brittany, and she didn't understand what was going on. Ever since that damn waitress had hit on her, she'd been feeling weird. She didn't like the waitress, she didn't want her. She didn't even remember the woman's name. So why was she feeling so confused?

Maybe her mother was right. She was like her father. When things were going well in her relationship, she had to fuck it up. Maybe she wasn't meant for long term relationships. She was just meant to have hook ups for the rest of her life. That could be fun right?


She gets pulled from her thoughts when she hears the front door open. Confused, she leans back in her chair, to look out into the living room where she sees her mother walking inside. "Santana?" The woman yells, throwing her purse onto the couch.

"Kitchen." Santana replies, looking down at her bottle of juice, she was twisting around in her hand. The older woman walks into the kitchen, "You're home from work early." Santana notes, not looking up from the bottle.

"I wasn't at work." The woman replies, as she glides across the kitchen floor, making her way over to the fridge.

Santana looks over at her curiously, watching as the woman pulls out a carton of milk, frowning when she finds it empty. "Where were you?" Santana asks, before she could even stop herself. She knew better than to get in to her mother's business, but her curiosity had beat out her thinking skills.

"Santana, why would you put an empty carton of milk back in the fridge?" Her mother asks frustrated. She makes her way over to the trash can, and throws it in with a loud clank, and a huff.

Santana rolls her eyes, as she starts picking at the label on her bottle, "I don't even drink milk." She says lowly. "What kind of appointment did you have?" She asks, turning towards her mother, to look her in the eyes. She didn't know where this braveness was coming from, but she wanted to know where her mother had been all day, and what was so much more important then talking to her.

Maria lets out a sigh, and leans back against the kitchen counter. "I went to a therapy session." She admits, before quickly turning around to face the sink. She grabs a towel from the drawer, turns the water on, and begins washing a bowl that had been sitting in the sink from this morning.

"You what?" Santana asks unbelievingly. Her eyes just about bug out of her head at the information, and she stares at the back of her mother's head, willing her with her mind to further explain.

Her mother doesn't respond, but keeps hurriedly washing her dishes, trying to distract herself from the conversation. She was much like Santana, where as she didn't like talking about feelings, or touchy subjects. "You heard me." She finally says calmly.

A silence falls over the two, and Santana debates whether or not she should pry, and question her mother further. God knows she wanted to but she also didn't want to get into another fight.

"I'm going to my room." Santana finally says quietly. She stands up from her chair and heads out of the kitchen.

"Santana, wait." Her mother yells out to her, stopping her in her tracks. She hears her mother let out a sigh, but she resists the urge to turn around. "I started going to therapy, because I…I realized that when I….When I hit you…I hit rock bottom." Her mother admits, and Santana can hear the quiver in her voice.

The admission almost knocks the breath out of Santana, and she feels her legs just about give out beneath her. She sucks her bottom lip between her teeth, and folds her arms tightly across her chest, still refusing to turn around.

"I don't think, you are like your father Santana." Maria says weakly. "You look exactly like him, and you do have some of his traits, but only the good ones." She admits quietly. "I'm just so angry at him, and every time I look at you I see him. I take my anger out on you, and it isn't right."

Santana chokes back a sob, her body visibly shaking at her mother's words. She slowly turns around, meeting her mother's tears filled eyes, and the damn bursts. Tears cascade down her cheeks and she just about falls as her knees feel weak. "I'm so happy, you're getting help mom." Santana says, through her tears. She wants to throw herself at her mother and hug her tight, but she couldn't. She was so used to this woman being cold to her, that it was just instinct to keep her distance. And it wasn't like her mother was coming any closer either.

Maria scoffs, and turns her attention down to the counter top next to her. "Don't look at me like that." She says. Her voice was still quivering, but it had a hint of harshness that Santana was so used to, which confused the younger Latina. "Don't look at me like I am broken." She spits out, moving her eyes back over to Santana.

"I-I wasn't." Santana stutters out. "I don't think you're broken." She says quietly. Her eyes move down to the table, unable to look at her mother who was looking at her with an intense gaze. "You're my mother, and I love you. I just want you to love me back." Santana admits, as more tears fall from her eyes.

The older woman bites her lip, and sighs. Santana slowly looks up and meets her mother's eyes. The woman's eyes are soft for once, and Santana thinks, hopes, she is going to respond, and tell her she does in fact love her. "I need a drink." the older woman says, before brushing past Santana, and walking out the door.

Santana lets out a heavy sigh, and buries her head in her hands. She couldn't help but let a smile form on her face even through it all.

Her mother was trying.

That had to mean she did love her right? She wasn't stupid enough to think that her mother would change after one session, but she was trying.

Santana hears her phone vibrating from inside her purse, and she quickly pulls the device out. Seeing Brittany's name flash across the screen, a smile forms on her face. "Hey babe." She greets, with a sniffle. She wipes her nose with the back of her hand, and breaths in deeply, trying to keep her emotions in check.

"What's wrong? You've been crying again." Brittany says, not even bothering to greet her girlfriend.

Santana smiles, and lets out a breath. Brittany knew her too well. "My mom, she started going to therapy." Santana tells the blonde with a smile. "She's actually getting help Britt."

"Baby, that's great!" Brittany replies, genuinely excited for her girlfriend. She had been so worried about Santana living with her mom. Especially after she'd slapped her a few nights ago. She was more than relieved to know the woman was actually getting help. But she couldn't deny that she was surprised. It hadn't seemed like the woman was anywhere close to admitting she had a problem, much less one she needed to get help for. "Did it go well? Did you guys talk?" Brittany asks curiously.

"We talked." Santana confirms. "She opened up, and she sort of apologized to me. I mean she didn't say sorry, but she did say she was wrong, and she did take back some of the things she said." Santana explains. "It was short lived though. She kind of snapped at me, then left to go have a drink." The brunette adds, sadly.

Brittany sighs into the phone, knowing Santana was upset, "Honey, it'll take time." Brittany tells her, and Santana nods, because she knows. "But at least she is trying. That's so great."

A smile appears on Santana's face, and she nods once again, even though she knew the blonde couldn't see her, "I know Britt." She says happily. She knew it'd take time, and she was willing to wait. She was just happy the woman was trying, and that she had at least taken back some of the things she'd said. It didn't make up for the years of torment, but it was definitely a start. "Did you have fun today?" Santana asks, changing the subject.

Brittany lets out a giggle, "I did!" She squeals, excitedly. "It was so much fun. Quinn and Rachel are so cute, right?" She asks the brunette cheerfully.

Santana simply hums in response, completely uninterested in the subject of Quinn and Berry, and how cute they were together. "Sure, Britts." She finally responds, knowing it'll make the blonde happy.

"We should go back soon!" Brittany informs Santana. "But I hope we don't get that same lady. She totally messed up my pasta, and I couldn't even eat it. It was like the mushrooms were mocking me every time I looked at my food. I swear they kept multiplying when I tried picking them all out." Brittany explains, and Santana can tell Brittany is doing that adorable scrunching thing with her nose, which makes her smile. "I also didn't like the way she was looking at you." Brittany adds quietly.

Santana inhales deeply, and glances over at her purse. She slides her fingers inside, and pulls out the receipt from earlier, and looks down at the numbers scribbled across the bottom. "You don't have to worry about her Britt Britt." Santana says with a smile. She stands up from her chair and rips the paper up, before tossing it into the the trash can. "You're my one and only."

Okay guys, it's been awesome! Thank you guys so much for reading and sticking with me even though it took so long for me to update at times! If you guys would please leave me one last review and let me know overall what you guys thought, or if you have any last questions about the story, please let me know! :) Thanks again!