What Happens in the Broom Shed Stays in the Broom Shed

A HariPo oneshot

by mew-tsubaki

Note: The Harry Potter characters belong to J.K. Rowling, not to me. This pairing is a Mew and Mor's Weird Pairing, which you may find in the M&MWP forum (see my profile for details). Check out and join the forum FUN! Read, review, and enjoy! Originally written for Morghen.

- ^-^3

It was just one of those days when the whole gang wanted to hang out and maybe play a game of Exploding Snap or Gobstones or something. Scorpius, Lorcan, Freddie, Roxanne, and Lysander… They were all at Freddie and Roxanne's place today, since the only house liable to survive their destruction probably belonged to George and Angelina Weasley.

"AGH! How could I have lost again?!" Lorcan yelled in frustration as he slapped his forehead.

His girlfriend snickered. "What can I say, Lorcan?" Roxanne teased. "You just bite at rock-paper-scissors."

Freddie sighed. "Can we please play something else? Or go grab a bite to eat or something? Or go have a firewhiskey!"

Scorpius gave his boyfriend a reproving stare. "Freddie, only Lorc, Sander, and I are of age to grab some firewhiskey. You and Roxanne still have a year left of school. You're still kids."

"Then what? Does that make you a cradle-robber?"


Lysander rolled his eyes at their banter. "How about we go for a fly? A small-scale game of Quidditch?"

His twin, Lorcan, scoffed. "Hardly. We'd need one extra person, San."

Lysander frowned. "Well, I don't hear any bright ideas from you."

"All right, all right… Maybe an exhilarating game of catch will suffice," Lorcan retorted with certainly feigned enthusiasm.

The five of them got up and started to leave the living room. "So a half-ish Quidditch game, then?" Roxanne asked as the lot of them headed for the back door.

"Since we're one person short, I'll referee," Lysander stated. "And, to set handicaps, Scor and Lorc aren't allowed on the same side."

"Sounds good," Freddie stated. "Couples, then?"

Scorpius shook his head. "Nah, not today. I'll take Roxie, and you go with Lorcan."

"Aw, someone pouting?"

"If by 'someone' you mean a 'cradle-robber,' then yes."

"Oh, come off it, Malfoy…"

Lorcan motioned to his brother. "Mind getting the brooms?"

"No problem." Lysander was happy to head to the opposite side of the house. If Scorpius' remarks were any gauge, a nasty argument between him and Freddie was about to erupt. It was annoying enough when they got along; sometimes it was unbearable to be around his friends when their bickering escalated. And it didn't help that Lorcan and Roxanne felt it best to leave Scorpius and Freddie to it and not to intervene.

As Lysander rounded the corner, he heard a call behind him. Knowing the others were probably just getting outside, the Scamander son glanced over his shoulder—and his heart sped up a bit. Walking up to him with a bright, lovely smile was Teddy Lupin…Lysander's kinda-sorta-definitely love.

"H-Hey," Lysander stuttered, slightly confused.

"Hullo," Teddy said. He bent down and pecked the blond's lips. "You look…ravishing today," he stated with a mischievous wink.

"What are you doing here?"

"Me? Ah, nothing much… Just thought that a certain Wheeze that found its way into Hermione's purse ought to be returned to its original owner." He gestured to the house. "George out?"

"Yeah, with Angelina. I told you a few days ago I was planning on hanging out with my mates today."

Teddy pouted. "Yeah, yeah, I know… But things are slow at the Auror Office right now. And I'm sure you were getting lonely, stuck here with your brother and his girlfriend, and your best mate and his boyfriend."

"The twins are my friends, too," Lysander corrected as he continued his path outside to the broom shed. He threw the wooden door open a little harder than he'd intended.

"Hey…" Teddy frowned. "I didn't mean to upset you. I know they're all your friends. I was just thinking it might've been getting a little stuffy with…y'know, that certain atmosphere." He caught Lysander's arm right as the younger wizard's hand closed around a broom handle. "Hey, I mean it: I don't want you upset."

Lysander twisted his lips around. "…okay. I believe you."


"Help me with these brooms, then?"

"Sure. You all playing?"

"Nah. We've got an odd number of people." Lysander passed Teddy the twins' brooms and had him lean them against the open door. He ventured further inside to find extra brooms for Lorcan and Scorpius. "It seems they aren't playing couples today, since Freddie shot his mouth off and now Scorpius is sulking."

Teddy winced. "Ouch… Poor Freddie."

"Are you kidding?" Lysander asked. "Freddie was asking for it."

"Does this mean I'm not really forgiven?"

"Keep asking, and I'll revoke my mercy."

Teddy pouted again. "Sandy…"

"Don't call me that, Teddy."

"But, Sandy…" He quietly pulled the shed's door shut when Lysander had his back turned. He came up right behind Lysander and barely grazed the younger wizard's upper arm with his fingertips. His lips curled up at the ends as Lysander jumped and goosebumps arose on his skin. "Sander…"

Lysander bit his bottom lip. What was the point of being a little annoyed when Teddy was right there, wanting to fix any and all little mistakes? His fingers touched another broomstick, but his hand fell back to his side as Teddy drew that arm back towards him.

"Don't you like to forgive me…?" Teddy breathed as Lysander leaned back into him. Oh, Merlin, was it bad that he could already feel something pressing against him? And Teddy was not the only guilty one; Lysander could feel himself…erm, swelling, too. "Lysander, pleeease forgive me…"

"Oh, to hell with it," Lysander mumbled as he turned around and grabbed Teddy roughly by the neck and snogged him, shoving his tongue into the older wizard's mouth reflexively. Even if it hadn't been for the warm weather, their shirts would've come off just as quickly, since they were both already starting to perspire. Teddy's tanned skin from being out in the field one-too-many times glinted with a bit of sweat, but Lysander's light sheen almost gave a glowing impression.

Teddy kissed his skin everywhere available with a ravenous fervor. The words "sensational" and "temptation" came to Lysander's mind as Teddy threw down his heavy outer cloak and guided Lysander down onto it, but then all the words ran together in a puddle of mush as Lysander stopped thinking altogether. Wildly, before he'd lost too much of his mind, he groped around for his wand—released Teddy—and cast a quick Silencing Charm on the shed. Good thing, too, as their moaning would've definitely drawn the attentions of the others.

So being gone down on was nice enough…but Teddy had heart enough to actually make love with his boyfriend. Lysander knew he would; it was one of the reasons why he loved Teddy so much, that he could be instinctual and yet still utterly emotional. Lysander caught Teddy's mouth again, and they didn't break apart, even when Teddy thrust and Lysander consequently arched his back. It might have been a short taste of afternoon love, but it more than sufficed.

After a few minutes of heavy breathing, Teddy rolled off Lysander and pulled him into his arms. "Well, I think I've just made up for at least ten future slip-ups," he breathed with a chuckle.

"Damn straight," Lysander said, to which Teddy snorted. Lysander Scamander didn't use vulgar language…much.

The two males dressed, grabbed the extra brooms, and carefully tiptoed out of the shed, locking it behind them. Lysander started to fret when the area seemed oddly quiet. Then he heard abrupt laughter.

"And that's how you make up," Roxanne chirped as she and the other three watched Lysander and Teddy come into view.

"What do you mean?" Scorpius asked, his cheeks flushed.

"Easy," Lorcan stated. "Sander's walking a little bow-legged. You must be big, Mr. Lupin," he quipped as Teddy blushed and held his head.

Lysander flushed scarlet. "How long have you guys known?!"

"Since last year!" Freddie and Roxanne chorused.

Lysander cursed under his breath. "That was private, darn it…"

"Well…," Teddy said, "as long as I'm here…and we've now got the people… Quidditch anyone?"

- ^-^3

XDDD Smexy fluff is what I'm calling this, so ;P. Godric, sooo many innuendoes… XDDD I do love Teddy…and slash. And slash with Teddy. So this was just a piece of forbidden candy… *YUM!* And it wasn't all that graphic… ;3 At least they made up. *LOL*

Thanks for reading, and please review!

-mew-tsubaki :3

2017 note: *lol* A quick romp in the broom shed. Wow. That's it. I've written everything. XDDDD *jk, jk*