Meanwhile, in the deep dark lair of the League of Evil Exes…

Roxie Richter (Status: Bi) was currently scoffing at Matthew Patel's (Status: ARR!) choice of reading material.

"Pirates, seriously? Patel, I can't believe you. Ninjas are in this year."

Patel sighed, before turning to Roxie with an annoyed look.

"Yeah, right. Pirates really are in this year. At least my group is keeping up with the times."

Roxie snorted in amusement.

"If ninjas did keep up with the times, this world would fall into anarchy. The ninjas did you guys a favor."

Patel smirked as he summoned a demon hipster chick to take out a radio and push play.

"Yeah, at least my group isn't reduced to, oh I don't know, this!"

The radio began to play the first few bars of the Naruto theme song, before it was sliced in half by Roxie's sword. Roxie herself looked like she was going to lose all sense of composure.

"That doesn't exist. Besides, what about yours?"

With that, Roxie took out her own radio (Fun fact: who knows where they're getting this stuff?) and pressed play.

"YO! Ya-yo! Ya-yo! Dreamin'! Don't give it u-" BOOM! Matthew's eyebrow was now twitching as smoke rose from his outstretched finger.

"That s**t isn't even considered pirate!" Roxie growled and began to jab her sword at Matthew's chest.

"Just admit it! Ninjas are better. Pirates probably can't even do jack with guns! Face it, you guys are PUSSIES!" Matthew growled and began to jab his finger at Roxie's face.

"Really? That's pretty big talk coming from wimps who need to attack from the shadows. It probably means your precious ninjas are worth jack in a straight up fight."

Roxie looked like she had just been slapped before snarling and drawing her other sword.

"OH, THAT TEARS IT! I'll show you how good us ninja can be in a straight up fight! Prepare to die, you scurvy dog."

Matthew smirked as he pointed his hands, in the shape of guns, with tiny fireballs on the tips of the index fingers.

"After you, you…you…" Matthew had to think a while to think of a good name (Fun fact: What's Roxie doing?). "You shadow coward."

With that, the Indian Pirate Wannabe and the Blond Half-Kunoichi charged at each other.

One hour later…

Lucas Lee (Status: Sellout) was walking down the hallway, whistling happily as he made plans to watch his new movie (Status: Sucky) in the League of Evil Exes' DVD player. Reaching the living room, he was about to grab the knob when he heard voices. Curious, he leaned in close and began to listen.


"L-looks like-e it. Ugh! Matt, I need a little help here."

Lucas blinked in surprise before listening in again.

"Curses! And just when I had you wiggling in the face of reason." Roxie snorted.

"Yeah right, I'm pretty sure it was me who had you wiggling."

Lucas was now trying to look under the door to see what was happening.

"So…second opinion?"

"Hmm…how about I start off?"

Lucas finally got a good look and automatically leaped up. Quietly inching away, he made sure he was around the corner before making a break for it. The movie will have to wait…