In lieu of discussing our long-awaited, highly anticipated episode 6.12…*sigh* I offer up a little story set late in Season Five. #SaltAndBurnCW You're lucky the Winchesters have more important evil to hunt at the moment, but you're definitely on the list…

5.17 99 Problems tag with input from 5.18 Point of No Return

This is an episode that didn't hit me quite as hard when I first viewed it, those dang unreasonable expectations casting a shadow over what I saw while simultaneously managing to shock me with the ending. Frankly, I was unable to fathom Dean ever considering saying 'Yes'…but in retrospect, seeing how the season played out, it truly is a critical piece revealing where Dean's head was at and how he came to his fateful decision.

While each episode of Supernatural is enjoyable and worthy when viewed on its own, string them together in an arc and within the scope of an entire season and their value grows. I love the complexity of the Winchesters and the depth to their story. And I do love when they surprise me!

This is just a short introspective piece focusing on Dean's journey to becoming the servant of heaven. Of course, he's always been a servant of heaven, a protector of right, even when his faith was non-existent. I don't believe you have to attend church or be outwardly pious to be on the side of Good. Dean Winchester has proven that since day one.

Thanks for stopping by, B.J.


"And each man stands with his face in the light of his own drawn sword. Ready to do what a hero can." - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Long Run of Luck

"Dean, how did you do that?" Sam was suspiciously eyeing his brother. His heart thundering within his chest as the implication from what he'd just witnessed settled, his thoughts dark and foreboding.


"Kill her," he gasped out.

"Long run of luck held out, I guess." Dean avoided Sam's anxious stare, turning all focus to the task at hand, helping the injured preacher and angel into the back of the Impala. His eyes flickered in the general direction of his brother but just as quickly looked away before he could make contact, refusing to slow down long enough for Sam to properly interrogate him.

Only a true servant of heaven can kill the Whore of Babylon.

Cas' words echoed in both brothers' minds, drawing forth the same painful realization. Bringing out the terror in one, that his brother would give in to the angel's demands; confirming the truth for the other, that this was his destiny…any choice in the matter taken from him in the rush to battle. The inevitable finally coming to pass.

He hadn't planned it, hadn't made that conscious decision to give up or give in and yet it was obvious. He was the chosen one. He'd succeeded in killing the whore. Such a simple act, the heat of the moment sealing his fate.

If she hadn't died, if it hadn't worked, he could have gone on believing…in himself and in his brother, even if believing had gotten increasingly difficult. Even when he had already lost all hope.

The Apocalypse had started and war was upon them. But the carnage wasn't only coming from demons and the threat of angels. Now people were gunning down their friends, humanity turning on its own.

His life as a hunter trained him to never surrender, to fight 'til his dying breath. His beliefs as a man, in the sanctity of free will and self-determination, had made him more resolved than ever to rail against the angels' demands and keep searching for another way. While the Winchester creed constantly pushed him to continue on as they had throughout their lives, holding tight to each other in the hope that together they could once more beat insurmountable odds and stop the world from ending.

Reason trumped every belief held dear as his mind processed the facts and he knew.

At long last accepting reality as the proof was laid out before him.

Just like the false prophet, any hope that might remain was false hope.

The last of his hope dying along with the whore.

In desperation he'd grabbed that cypress branch and plunged it into her chest and she had died, the branch crackling like a bolt of lightning before flaming out and turning to ash.

If ever there was an omen; that was it.

Any chance of a different outcome ended just as she had.

There was no other way, no way around it.

They were out of options.

As his body and soul shuddered with defeat, his mind was forced to accept what his heart had already felt.

He was the sword…Michael's vessel. A true servant of heaven.

It was over…

The Apocalypse was nigh but not everyone had to die.

The fate of the world still rested on his shoulders…on his choice of whether or not he would accept his destiny.

He knew there was no point in talking to Sam or Cas about this. They wouldn't understand. Besides, this wasn't a decision to be settled by committee. They weren't the ones burning down the planet because he stubbornly refused to accept his role in this.

If the world burned, it was on him.

Watching another young man die bloody in his arms was more than he could bear, one final burden pulling him under. How could he allow billions to burn while he stood idly by locked within his principles?

Angel world, angel rules.

He didn't want this, never wanted this, but then he'd learned long ago that his wants didn't matter.

What did matter was duty, responsibility…honor and courage in the face of certain doom.

That was all he had left.

He was tired of fighting, tired of tilting at windmills.

Tired of losing and watching people die.

It was time to man up and accept his role in this.

A dead whore on the floor of the church was solid proof of that.

All that remained were a few goodbyes and some loose ends, the terms and conditions of his surrender hashed out before he turned over his body and shut down his mind.

He wished it was different, he truly did.

But then his wishes never counted for anything either.

If he had let Sam speak his mind, his brother would have surely told him to not sacrifice himself yet again. That was one lecture he could do without.

And sacrifice?

He knew how to do that.

This was just one more toll in a life filled with sacrifice.

But it was worth it if he could save half the planet. Half was a hell of a lot better than watching them all burn…

He had to believe that as he drove off down that last highway, towards a destiny not of his choosing but his just the same.

The End


January 2011

All standard disclaimers apply.

So, I guess Dean's long run of luck held…or maybe it was the strength of the Winchesters' character that gave them the means to defy heaven and hell and do things their way when it most mattered.

Thanks for reading and take care, B.J.