Hey guys, Tis I, British Chocolate. Ha.

This is my first fanfiction . and it's in Arthur's point of view, 3rd person. At the start.

Heh, it's PruCan, God knows what I'm going to do with that ;) but I'll leave it T for now.

I'm English, so COLOUR=Color, blah, blah…

Warnings: Bad language.

Country names and Personal names are used, because the characters know each other.

I do not own Hetalia Axis Powers or Hetalia World Series *I don't like that name D:*, Hideka H does. I bet I failed his name.

UnBeta'd , so mistakes are my fault. Please tell me where they are. I have included an OC, Siobhan (Republic of Ireland). I'm not sure if she'll be paired with anyone, and even if she is, it won't be that serious at all. It'll mostly be her getting messed around, in that relationship.

I spell Canada's name Matthew. That is one real way of spelling it. It's because I'm failing at French.


Arthur has a secret: he runs a B&B in London. It won't stay secret for long, as, the obnoxious Alfred has decided to pay an uninvited visit to the eyebrow-inator's lair; word's gonna get out, and someone's gonna get screwed! Namely, Matthew by the awesome Gilbert.

There's no more room in the bloody inn!

Chapter 1: French stalkers, British wizards, and American drunks.

Arthur grinned to himself. The first day of business was always quiet. No desperate students barging in the door after being kicked out of their parents' house, no foreign backpackers which Arthur never could understand, and definitely no annoying National Personifications.

Just him, on his own, his old guitar at hand, a pot of tea, and some (bleh) scrumptious tea by his side! He would remain a healthy gentleman, while Yao would most likely work all day, while Francis would get rejected on a rape, while Gilbird would dump Gilbert (gasp), and Alfred would finally die of obesity.


With the money he had earned –cough- stolen –cough- as a pirate, and the dosh he had REALLY earned from his years of fame, he had started a B&B. In London. Near his real house. So he could always go and curse Alfred in his spare time. The trouble was evading Ivan, God that guy was creepy! And also avoiding being killed by Siobhan. She should get over the fact half her country is gone. Almost half. Almost quarter. Whatever, he still completely OWNED her. He shuddered at the rather American phrase.

Arthur strummed a chord on the guitar, by putting it down again, momentarily remembering the idiotic things he had done while being a rock star. Francis (rape?)…and getting drunk all the time. Which he still did.

But the tedious times were over….weren't they?

Like a G6 blasted through the American car's stereo and Matthew squealed as Alfred swerved in front of an old lady, yelling.

"LIKE A HERO, LIKE A LIKE A HERO!" Alfred sang badly, and Matthew squeaked again.

"S-slow down! I'm jetlagged an-d so are you! So don't drive so recklessly! The driving system here is completely different!" Matthew gasped, as an angry beep was aimed at the American car, which Alfred insisted on being imported so he could show how "TOTALLY KICK ASS MY CAR IS!"

It took Alfred about a minute to realise that Matthew had said anything at all.

"Oh, BRO! C'MON! This song is so fricking awesome! Like, AWESOMER than Prussia Gilbert thinks he is! So I gotta drive fast! Brrmmmmmmm!" Alfred zoomed down the motorway, and bashed into a lorry.

Thankfully, nothing happened.

"N-Why are we here, anyway?" demanded Matthew, as fiercely as he possibly could (As fierce as Sealand).

"Dude! Yo! I thought I told your bear thingy? Or I got Tony to tell you, whatever I did, like yay!" Alfred babbled on, not really talking sense. He probably had one too many pints of bourbon, and unfortunately, British police weren't exactly keen on drink driving. He let go of the steering wheel completely, pushing up his rectangular glasses. Matthew could've fainted.

"Are you going to tell me, eh?" Matthew asked again, and Alfred looked up at his almost identical brother. Matthew patted the curl on his own head impatiently.

"Oh, right, Iggy like totally said that I should visit at this second house he's got, right? It's totally a Bed and Breakfast, as he would say." Alfred lied through his teeth, the cocky grin dissipating. "Who's that IGGY in the spotlight ooh, cause she turns me on!" he sang, and Matthew's face literally went *smlooosh*

"Um, I bet Arthur n-never invited us, and when, er, we get there he's going to like kick us out, and you know how expensive the flights are!" Matthew said crossly.

"Artie would never, like do that! He loves us! Okay, he didn't invite us, but, I like…"

"You g-gave Francis, um, your spare keys to Arthur's house, er, if he told you where Arthur goes in the Summer Vacations! Y-you are both such stalkers, eh!" Matthew almost screamed in frustration.

"Fine…ya got me, Canadia."

"I'm CANADA!" yelled Matthew, finally yelling.

Alfred looked a bit taken aback, and 'The Club is Alive' by JLS finished.

The next song was 'What ever happened to the Heroes' by Joss Stone came on. How fitting.

Matthew shook his head. What ever happened to the hero? He got drunk and drove in Britain, that's what happened.

Like it? Love it? Hate it? No flames, but criticisms are welcome! Thanks! Is it funny? Tell me all about it, please! Prussia WILL arrive soon, promise! Food feeds the tramps, and reviews feed the authors.

BritishChocolate. You really should try it. THE FOOD, NOT ME! (France~?)