Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer.
Do you know that everyday is the first of the rest of your life? / You can tell me all your thoughts about the stars that fill polluted skies. And tell me where you run to when no one's left to take your side. But don't tell me where the road ends, 'cause I just don't want to know. No, I don't want to know. / "Angels on the Moon," by Thriving Ivory
Alpha & Omega
That's what I woke up to. Sounds of Bella. Smells of Bella and... just everything Bella...
My stomach made a scary, gurgling noise that nearly had me bolting out of bed until the stiffness in my body stopped me, and I dropped back down with a grunt. "Ungh... Fug..." I lifted my head and squinted at the pillow. Jeez. I'm drooling now, too?
Rise and shine.
You need food.
I need Bella.
That, too... but food first, Bella later.
I don't like that order.
Then it dawned on me that Bella was talking, but since I didn't hear anyone else's voice I concluded she was on the phone.
I'd not felt so freaking drained in – I didn't know how long. But the images that came flooding back gave me a sweet reminder. Not that I needed one... fucking great. I wondered what Bella would think about me crossing her living room, sporting morning wood.
Only one way you'll find out.
Where were my boxers? I crawled feebly to the edge of the bed to look down. Shit. All my clothes were missing. Now I was up – not in that way, well, I was – and I pushed off the bed, swaying slightly.
"Whoa... head-spin." Jesus, go away, I ordered, then took stock of my surroundings. Unless I was about to make an idiot of myself and use Bella's bathrobe – not fucking likely – I simply had to walk out there and she'd just have to accept it. She'd taken my clothes, so it's not like I had much choice in the matter.
Bella was on the phone in the kitchen when I crossed the living area. Her mouth popped open and she just stared. A smirk curled my lips when I heard the voice on the other side of the line ask if she was still there. I'm so not sorry.
I took the liberty of using her shower while I was in the bathroom, and just as I was finishing up there was a knock on the door.
"It's unlocked," I called out and put my face in the stream to wash the soap off before I poked my head out. Bella had my clothes and a towel, and put them down on the edge of the bathtub.
"Sorry about that. I was just folding them, and then the phone rang and-"
"Bells, it's okay," I interrupted.
She grinned. "Okay – hungry?" she asked, and I cocked an eyebrow making her cheeks flood with color as she stuttered, "F- for food, I mean, um... Okay, I'll be in the kitchen."
"Sorry, honey," I quickly said – not really – but she'd already closed the door. I laughed.
Jeez, can't a guy have some fun?
Plenty, but you'll pass out half way through.
Three things were foremost on my mind when I left the bathroom. One: I needed to bring some extra clothes to keep at Bella's place, especially boxers. Two: There was a God, because he made sure I only bought button-up jeans. And three: I'd totally missed one... or two?
Bella looked up from the frying pan with a grin. "I made you some breakfast," she said distractedly and glanced over her shoulder at the clock. "I don't have much time. I've got an appointment and, um, yeah – I can't miss it," she finished cryptically.
I raised a brow as I came up to stand behind her and slipped my hands around her waist. "Are you in trouble?" I teased and leaned down to rub my nose against her neck. She leaned into me with a soft sigh.
"Um, no. At least, not yet."
Lightly, I pressed my lips to her ear, her jaw and finally placed my cheek against hers as I glanced curiously at the contents of the frying pan. "Are you expecting to be?" I wondered and reached out to grab a piece of bacon. She swatted at my hand.
"Jake, it's hot!" she admonished, but I popped the piece into my mouth anyway. Sure enough, it was a bit hot but, as the wolf had pointed out, I was in severe need of food.
"I'll manage," I said while chewing.
She tilted her head to look at me and rolled her eyes. "God," was all she said, and I pecked her lips quickly before pulling back with a wide grin.
"Rose's lucky she's having a girl, you males are so impossible."
"Hey, you weren't complaining about the pro's of the male species last night-" I laughed, but allowed the pretty impressive smack she gave my shoulder. "-Besides, if I get burnt I'll heal fast enough, honey, so don't worry." Bella grabbed the plate next to the stove and scooped up some bacon and eggs then thrust it at me. "Oh, nice service," I complimented in an appreciative tone and winked. "Thanks."
"You're welcome." Her expression softened, then she looked almost nervous, which made me pause. "So, I've really got to get going, but... just make sure the door's locked if you have to leave, okay?"
I put the plate down, and pulled her to me with one hand in her hair, "Bells?" while the other circled her waist.
"Yeah?" she breathed.
"Um, nothing's up – why would something be up?"
I smirked at that, making her eyes widen momentarily, then she shoved at my chest, making me chuckle. "Okay, okay – sorry," I sincerely said, but I was smiling now at the color in her cheeks and her escalating heartbeat.
"Honestly, Jacob, I have to go. It's – this is an important meeting," she managed with some semblance of seriousness.
"Do I get a kiss?" I faked a pout, making her eyes narrow.
"A kiss, as in one?" she dubiously asked.
"Sure, sure. I can behave."
"Uh-huh." Not convinced, she still stretched up to meet my lips. I released her hair to feel down her back and reached beneath her blouse with both hands. She started to protest when I traced her bottom lip with my tongue. "Jake – you're not being fair."
I smiled. "Neither are you. You're wearing clothes."
Bella scoffed. "I guess I should walk around naked like you just did, huh?" The visual was enough to get me going, and I groaned.
"Don't make me answer that," I told her in a strained voice, again too damn grateful for my button-up jeans.
I chuckled, and then whispered, "Totally your fault."
She swallowed. "Okay – Jake? I've got to go."
Squeezing my eyes shut, I leaned my forehead against hers. "Okay, honey." Then stood there as she slipped out of my arms. I took a couple of calculated breaths . . .
"Oh," she said, and I opened my eyes when she came up to me again, her bag over her shoulder and a grin on her face. She took my hand and pressed something into it, then reached up to kiss my jaw. "I'll talk to you later."
"Yeah," I acknowledged, distracted by the tiny, cool object in my palm, and looked down – I stared. "Uh, Bells, what's with the-"
"Love you!" she called over her shoulder before she disappeared through the door.
Had she seriously just given me a key? Struck dumb, I just continued staring at it. At a moment like this, any other guy would drop the key and run for the hills – it would be up there with finding a pink toothbrush and tampons in his bathroom cabinet – but I wasn't just any guy. Also, I'd wanted and waited a damn century for this woman to reciprocate those wants so, instead – grateful for no witnesses – I did a fist-pump before slipping the key into my pocket and grabbing my breakfast.
You're embarrassing yourself.
Tell somebody who gives a shit.
I was standing in the front office of Wreck & Roll, going over a few numbers with Leah and getting ready to close for the day when Sam walked in. Leah shifted awkwardly, which made me cock a brow when she wouldn't look up. I turned my eyes on Sam. He seemed normal – as normal as Sam could be with that beard he wouldn't get rid of – so I just shrugged.
"Time for a shave?" I wondered, getting the cash out of the register.
"Don't knock the beard, it's one of my best friends," Sam said with a grin.
I shook my head. "You keep strange friends," I offered, chuckling.
"You're one to talk," Leah said, and I glanced at her in question.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
She turned a page over, smirking. "Have you forgotten about your furry little friends on the tundra?"
I laughed. "Oh, Pooky?"
"Pooky?" Sam wondered in confusion.
"Don't ask," Leah said. "It was disturbing."
"She's just jealous 'cause I preferred a squirrel's company to hers." I dodged Leah's hand before it could do damage to the back of my head.
"I had several 'conversations' with an owl back in the day," Sam revealed. Leah and I looked at him, surprised, and then she rolled her eyes.
"The Alpha thing must add to the crazy," she said under her breath.
My phone went off in my pocket, and I fished it up to answer. It was Bella.
Leah smirked again and continued leafing through the receipts.
I spoke to the phone. "Hey, what's up?"
"I'm almost there, and I really hope you're not busy," she said, all secretive-like.
"Not overly so, just got to finish clearing out the cash register, then we're closing for the day – why?"
"You'll find out soon enough – I have to make a turn now. I'll see you soon."
She hung up.
"That was fast," Leah said and I didn't even bother wiping the smile off my face. "Weren't you up there yesterday?" she continued.
"Yeah – so?"
Leah held her hands up in surrender, then grabbed the stack of receipts. "Since he's going to be all busy soon, can you help me with something, Sam?" she wondered.
"Yep, no problem," he agreed, and then to me, "I'll catch up with you later, I need some help back at the house."
"Sure, sure." I watched them as they walked outside.
I wasn't sure what was going on, and with our differing phasing schedules I hadn't gotten a look into Leah's mind lately. It was more a guessing game these days to figure her out. Sam wasn't much for talking about things, but could I really blame him? I'm sure his head had been quiet and calm once all the guys stopped phasing, but he'd still find the privacy to be invaluable.
I sure as hell enjoyed mine, and I hoped I'd never have anyone digging through my head again.
There's nothing there of interest, it's all Bella Bella Bella.
Thanks to you, smartass.
It was like that from the moment I got hooked up with you, so don't you mouth off at me.
What's with the attitude?
I'm just reflecting you.
Reflect this. I started humming bad 1990's one-hit-wonders in my head while finishing up with the cash register.
A flashy car pulled up just outside Seaview Cafe as I locked up the office and I saw Jamie get out. She studied at the University of Alaska, too, now, and shared a student apartment with someone Bella had helped her get in contact with. Now, being Friday, she was back, but I didn't recognize the car she'd arrived in.
Then a guy got out, and judging by Jamie's sheepish expression when she glanced my way, I had a pretty good idea it wasn't just a good Samaritan that had brought her home.
"Hey, Jake – come here for a minute," she called out to me. The guy turned his head in my direction and I smirked as he eyed me. Don't worry, buddy, I'm not going to hurt you.
"Hey," I said to him.
Jamie rounded the car. "Ryan, this is Jake. Jake, Ryan."
Ryan thrust his hand at me, and I shook it. Surprise flashed on his face, and Jamie giggled. "Hey," he said. "Jamie's been telling me about you."
"Don't get cocky," Jamie playfully said.
"Wouldn't dream of it." I winked at her and turned back to Ryan. "Watch out for this one if you're planning on keeping her company in the kitchen."
Jamie huffed. "Ass – way to drop him in the deep end."
He looked puzzled so I went on to clarify, "Don't worry, the end result is good. Just steer clear during the process."
"She does seem a bit uncoordinated," he allowed, and I had to laugh.
"Jake!" Jamie smacked me.
"Okay – a lot," Ryan amended and at Jamie when her eyes widened in disbelief.
"Great." She turned to me. "Payback time, is it?"
"You and Bella gang up on me, so it's only fair," I pointed out. They did. What had I ever done to them? I couldn't say I minded though. If anything I was pretty stoked they both got along as well as they did.
"Speaking of the devil," Jamie said with a grin. I didn't need to look, I'd heard the truck approach, but I felt her. The door made a whiny noise – I guess it was time to oil the hinges – before slamming shut, and I turned to see Bella coming toward us.
Warmth instantly flooded my chest and then her arms came around me, making me wonder if my heart was going to jump out my chest. I curled an arm around her, holding her closer. "Hey, Bells," I said into her hair.
"Hey," she replied, giving my chest a nuzzle before turning to Jamie and Ryan. "And hey, again – how did the lecture go?" she asked Jamie.
"Oh my gosh, it was interesting!" she gushed. "I seriously could sit through his lectures for hours."
"He might be Count Dracula and possibly he inspired a lot of modern day beliefs," Ryan said. "But just because he impaled thousands of people doesn't mean he's a vampire – you don't become one until after you die."
"That's a Strigoi," Jamie said. "Who says Romanian vampires are the real ones? There are a ton of vampire legends."
I stared at them – Bella tugged my shirt to make me tear my eyes away. "They're studying Vlad the Impaler," Bella explained, then she smirked. "The real Count Dracula."
"Uh-huh," I offered.
"Come on." Bella pulled on my hand. "Catch you later," she said to Jamie and Ryan. They gave us a distracted nod without interrupting their discussion.
"That was weird," I told her when we came up to the Chevy. "It's not every day you hear people talking about vampires," I jokingly added.
"Really?" Bella asked with an arched brow, but then her eyes lit up mischievously. "So... Remember that thing we talked about?"
Talking and explanations as to why she was here today could wait. I'd missed her and I'd be damned if I'd go another second without kissing her.
A gasp rushed from her lips before I smothered it with mine.
"Jake," she somehow managed, and pushed on my chest. "I have to tell you," she persisted. I gave up on her mouth as she was adamant to talk, instead brushing my lips across her cheek to her ear.
"It can wait," I whispered. She choked back on a giggle when my hands dove beneath her top – I frowned against her neck. "What's this?" I accused, tugging at the second layer of fabric tucked into her jeans.
"It's been a cold day," she defended, and I let her pull back. She was grinning.
"Right – it's got to come off," I said in a serious tone.
"Jake," she said, sighing. The flicker of emotion in her eyes told me she probably wouldn't mind if I picked her up and took her home right now, which is what I wanted to do. "Do you remember what we talked about?" she asked again, but more quietly. She had to know where my mind was.
"You're killing me, honey."
Bella feigned a pout. "Oh, well – I guess I'll just let my teachers know I won't be doing most my studies online after all, I mean, if you're not interested in me living with you, you're not." She shrugged indifferently.
That shut me up. I just stared at her, and then swallowed before I managed, "What...?"
She was trying really hard to hold the smile back, and it made her mouth twitch with the effort. Still faking disinterest, she continued. "I'll just leave the suitcase with all my clothes here in the truck – have you eaten yet? I can cook, unless you want to have something at the cafe." Bella sighed dramatically. "Oh well..." When she turned her back to start walking toward the cafe, I finally snapped out of it. She squeaked when I scooped her up.
"That's what you've been keeping from me?" I asked quietly as her hands fidgeted with my shirt. She didn't look at me, but she was smiling now, and then she nodded.
"Yeah – I'm sorry I didn't say anything, I wanted it to be a surprise." Slowly she met my eyes. "It's still what you want... Right?"
Was she seriously asking me that? "Honey," I said, but then I didn't know how to continue. Holy fucking shit... "You're... Are you..."
Oh, your way with words never ceases to amaze me.
Shut up, Mr. Take-her-and-claim-her.
Her small hand on my face brought things back into focus. "I want to be with you all the time," she told me with such sincerity my heart hurt. "But I'll settle for as much, and as often as I can – which is why I had that appointment to discuss my studies and how to get around-"
I crushed her to me. "I love you," I whispered into her shoulder. Her lips moved against my ear, sending a wave of heat through me.
"Love you, too, Jake. I missed you."
Too much. Just too fucking much. I tugged impatiently at the shirt – if I couldn't touch her skin soon I'd go crazy – until I managed to mold my hand against the warmth I needed. She slid down against me, and when her feet touched the ground I let my other hand slip beneath the layers to splay across her lower back.
"Missed you more," I said, feeling my insides relax as I stroked up and down her smooth skin. "You're honestly going to stay with me now?" As much as I just knew it was true, and felt the conviction behind her words, I had to hear it again.
"Yeah," she replied and tilted her head to look up at me. "I'll have to go to campus a couple of days a week still for the few classes that aren't offered online, and for labs and things, but I'll be here, and when I can't be, you've got a key to my apartment..."
I was such a girl, but I couldn't help it, and Bella's eyes widened as she saw the proof. "Shh, honey," I told her thickly before she could comment. "Don't talk." I pressed my lips into hers and she parted them to draw me in. Her warm tongue stroked against mine, deep and slow, as I clutched her tightly against me.
We broke apart when my hands wanted to touch more than I should in public, and Bella wriggled out of my arms to walk around the back of her truck while straightened her shirts.
"Want to help me carry?" she asked, her face slightly flushed, but grinned widely.
"Yeah, I can do that." I took a deep breath then let out a sputtering laugh when I saw not one, and not two, but three large suitcases on the truck bed. "You don't travel light, do you, Bells?"
She shrugged. "I'll be spending more time here than in Anchorage, so of course I had to bring all the essentials."
I grabbed all three, leaving her empty handed. Instead she shoved her hands in her pockets and walked with me down alongside Wreck & Roll and into my courtyard.
Once inside, I brought the suitcases down to my bedroom. "You'll have to dig around and rearrange things, honey, 'cause I don't know how you want stuff." I turned to her where she stood leaning against the doorframe.
"You really don't want to give me that permission," she said in a playful tone.
"And why's that?"
"You might not find your things once I'm done." She laughed when my brows pulled down in worry. "I'm kidding, I won't mess it up..." She came up to me and gave my shirt a light tug. "...too badly." She winked and leaned up to peck my chin. "Now – have you eaten?"
"Want me to cook something?" she asked and moved toward to door while unzipping her jacket. She paused. "You do have food here, right?"
I laughed. "We're hopeless, but, come on, we're male. We can't live without food."
Her eyes narrowed. "That all depends on what you classify as food."
Shaking my head, I moved past her, but grabbed her hand to pull her along. "If Jamie doesn't help, Nessie makes sure there's decent stuff here." I opened the freezer and stepped aside to show Bella. "Good enough?"
"Holy crap," was all she said.
"Knock yourself out."
Her eyes flitted to mine briefly, then back to the freezer. "Yeah, I think I might."
"I'll grab a shower while you give it a whirl," I said. "Unless you want my help?"
Bella was already digging through the shelves. "No, it's okay, I'll... figure it out," she assured me before I left the kitchen.
Showered and in a ratty old pair of sweats – when in my own home, I really couldn't give a shit what I put on – I came into the kitchen to find Bella balancing on her tiptoes on a chair, trying very hard to reach a can of crushed tomatoes from the top shelf in the pantry.
"Aw, honey," I said softly. "Need help?" I grinned when she threw me a look over her shoulder.
"No. By all means, stand there and laugh at me instead."
"Well..." I quirked a brow meaningfully toward her ass. "I don't mind the view."
"Ugh – a little help?"
Before she could turn, I put my hands on her thighs, sliding upward while letting my thumbs brush across her ass. I leaned down to kiss a strip off exposed skin just at her hip where her shirt had hiked up. "Mm, you look pretty good up here, Bells," I mumbled against the soft warmth.
"Jacob," she scolded as I looked up at her. "I'm in the middle of cooking."
I shrugged. "Don't let me interrupt," I said but returned to her hip, raising the fabric a bit more while trailing the indent of her waist with my lips.
"That's distracting, too, you know," she said a bit unevenly.
"Is it?" I moved my hands to the front of her thighs, letting my fingertips feel along the inner seam of her jeans, upward, making her breath stutter on each intake. "And this?"
"Not helping," she whispered.
I kissed my way to her stomach, closing my eyes when I caught her scent. "Yeah... you're not helping either, honey," I told her, my voice giving away her effect on me, and straightened. I let her shirt fall back into place and reached up to grab the can for her.
"Thank you," she mouthed, then leaned in to touch her lips to mine.
I was supposed to just stand back and let her cook, was I? No. Fuck that.
I stepped closer until our bodies were touching, wrapped my arms around her, and held her tightly as I demanded more from her mouth. A tiny protest escaped her when I picked her up and walked her over to the counter where she'd started cutting onions. I swiped it all to the side, put her down and stepped between her knees.
"Jake," she gasped when something clattered to the floor.
"Oops," I mumbled against her lips. Not that I really cared. Instead I grabbed her thighs and kissed her hard.
A whimper slipped out of her when she pressed herself against me. I was already so damn hard it wasn't funny, and I'd been going crazy for her since yesterday morning. Sam hadn't been kidding when he said I should count my blessings Bella and I hadn't had sex.
Too late now.
No fucking shit.
But you don't regret it.
Uh... hell no?
Bella's hands fluttered down my front, coming to rest at the waistband of my sweats. She tugged lightly. "Take them off," she whispered.
She moved her hands quickly to unbutton her jeans, and when she started wriggling to get them down I slipped my hands around her hips to help, lifting her by her ass. After a few huffs, she kicked the pants off.
"I hope you don't like these," I told her, running a finger along the edge of her panties.
"Huh?" Her eyes searched mine as I reached down... and ripped them off. I tossed them over my shoulder. Bella gaped at me, and then sucked in a sharp breath when I found her slick and ready with my fingers.
"Fuck, I need you." I buried my hand in her hair and crushed her mouth with mine, at the same time slipping a finger inside her. Jesus and fuck. A moan vibrated in the back of her throat when I added another finger, moving them in and out of her to the matching strokes of our tongues.
Bella quivered around me and I felt her tugging at my sweats. Our mouths separated, and she panted, "Please, Jake, I want you. Now."
I sure as shit wasn't arguing with that, and withdrew my fingers to shove my pants and boxers down, kicking them off. She grabbed me with one hand, and I groaned at how freaking soft and perfect she felt. Then she scooted forward and ran the tip of me against her wet folds.
"Bella..." I gripped her hips as she guided me into her. It was too easy now to give in and to the surprise of us both, I shoved inside her to the hilt, making us both moan.
I held still, with major effort, as I tried to gain some semblance of control. All I really wanted to do, though, was to take her. Hard. Dammit. Are we going to have this problem every single goddamn time?
You know what you want, so stop whining.
Slowly, ignoring the rush in my veins that demanded more, I pulled back a fraction before I pushed back inside. "I missed you," I whispered against her ear. Again I repeated the movement. She felt her way up my chest and outward across my shoulders before anchoring herself to my arms as I continued to move inside her.
"Mm, missed you, too – oh – you feel so good."
Jesus Christ. I can't... "Honey?" I kept moving. In. Out. And fuck it was so damn good. Her breath hitched when somehow I'd picked up the pace and thrust into her harder than I intended.
"Let go," she coaxed in a raspy whisper. "I'm yours, Jake. I'm not as breakable as you think I am." Her eyes held mine as I slowed down to an almost stop to search for a contradiction. She reached up and took my face between her hands. "I want you, all of you. Don't hold back, baby, it's okay."
A shudder ran along my spine, but I ignored the fire in my blood. "Fuck, honey, you can't say shit like that-" Goddammit. I slipped my hands to cup her ass and lifted her off the counter. "You want me?" She nodded and wrapped her legs around my waist. God. "And what if I don't want all that there is to me anymore?" This was fucked up. I was inside her, she wanted me and I wanted her but I had to do this now?
A wave of heat hit me.
"Anything you want, I want... I didn't mean-"
"Shh, I know. I just-" A groan. "Fuck it." Bella let out a surprised sound when her ass hit the table and I laid her back and hovered over her. "I'm giving it up, Bells, I never wanted it, but I always wanted you." I leaned one elbow next to her and grabbed her thigh to lift and open her up. "Is that okay with you, honey?"
Her eyes were wide, and she was going to say something but when I pushed into her again, and then again, only a wordless moan came out.
"I need to know that it's okay," I reiterated while our bodies came together with a series of stumbling breaths, wet noises and slick skin against skin. It wasn't possible to feel this fucking good, but, ultimately, she still could break me if she wanted.
"I- I need," she said as her breathing caught. "I need you to be happy, Jake, that's all. Whatever you need, I need." She focused her eyes on me. "No matter what, so-" I covered her mouth with mine and didn't hold back on the blazing heat that burst in my chest...
...and gave my girl what we both wanted on our kitchen table.
I'm still here, you dick.
Shut up. I'm busy.
For once the dude with the magnifying glass left me alone, and no one walked in while Bella and I put the kitchen to good use.
Wonders will never cease.
*~oiO\_ Important Author's Note_/Oio~*
I want to thank you all, from the bottom of my heart, for reading this story (both versions; those of you who knew the first one) and for sticking with me and with it. And a big thank you to Cretin who made Soulmatter 2.0 the great effort that it was. I couldn't have done it without her.
I might not return to it. (I might...)