Hope everyone will like this, if not don't be to harsh please :P
Disclaimer. Mrs. Meyer owns it all!
Make-up redone for the third time. Check
Worst day of my life. Check
I stifled a sob. I was really going to have to try not to think about this if I really wanted to stop crying. After all it was my wedding day, and the freaking mascara kept running down my face every time a tear was spilled and I was done trying to fix it.
Some women actually looked forward to this since they were practically born, a wedding, a house, more money than anyone should be allowed to have in one lifetime, the whole package. That's what life was about for some people, so much so that it was the only thing driving them forward. I even was one of them a long time ago. But that was over by now. It was over since I met him, since he walked right into my life and destroyed it all. I called that day the beginning of the hell, the beginning of my hell. I think in real life it was called something else and had another meaning. Whatever, I really don't know by now and actually don't care, but for me that's what it was.
That became my new mantra, a poor choice I know, but still. I didn't care for much this days. The ache in my chest was enough to keep me distracted. I was trying not to morn about my sad pathetic life, but now standing here looking like a bride to be, it was hard not to cry.
The reflection in the mirror looked back at me with pity, with self loath and I think a little bit of hate. This wasn't me, not anymore anyway, my brown eyes were lifeless, I definitely looked a lot paler and al least ten pounds lighter. And she hated me for it. I had let this happen without some sort of a fight, without that spark my mother always thought I had. I had let that man consume everything I was until there was nothing left, he was still doing it and I was still letting it happen. Not that there was anything to do realistically, he wasn't exactly forcing me. I was doing this willingly. My father's life and future were at stake here, and even when the only thing on my mind was to run away and never come back, I knew that wasn't possible. I was being forced to live with the decisions I had made, and I didn't want to face them, like the coward that I was, I didn't want to marry a man that not only I didn't love but I despised with all my being, and there was nothing I could do about it.
I took a step back and flopped down on the soft white leather couch. Breath in – breath out, I told myself. If I could just stay calm enough and not break down on the cold tile floor, I could get through this. After all I had made my choice, as much of a choice as this could be considered anyway. I would no let my father die for his own mistakes, because that is what he said would happen. Breath in – breath out. I just wanted to cry, curl up and hide myself.
Tears were running down my cheeks and I barely had a grip on the sobs, and those memories were the only thing I could think about. Just like those dying people, and how they say that right before the end, right before it's all over, they see their entire life flash before their eyes, I guess it was like that for me, I could relate to that, except for the fact that I wasn't dying…physically anyway.
I ran up the stairs and opened the front door, I was running late and I had to start diner soon before dad came home. I dropped my bag on the hallway and as soon as I heard voices I stopped dead on my tracks. I didn't see the cruiser outside, did I miss it? No, I would have seen it. What was my dad doing home at this hour? And who was with him? I tried to listen carefully, but only got glimpses of it.
"But what do you expect me to do?" My dad hissed. "to turn myself in, to die in there?"
"To let me know!". My dad was shouting now. "you know very well that's not the case, you know you could stop this, just say the word and all of this would be over".
"But Mr. Swan, why would I do that?" he said in a boring tone. "what could I possibly gain out of that".
"Please" my dad was begging the man "please, I have a daughter, tell them to stop this, I would do anything you ask of me, please".
"Sorry, Mr. Swan, you are not good to me, nor you ever will be. Goodbye".
I heard the footsteps walking towards me before I had a chance to move, and then I saw him. He looked startled for a minute, but he composed and hid whatever emotion was crossing through his face.
I didn't understand. Did I hear right? It couldn't be. Who was this man? Why was he talking to my father about his death?. My breathing picked up. I didn't whether to be confused, overwhelmed or terrified.
And he just stayed there looking at me. And then he spoke. "You must be Ms. Swan, I've heard so much about you", the way he said that made me tremble "My name is Edward Cullen, I'm your father's…."
I jumped as I heard the knock on the door. Apparently my time was over and I was doomed to walk down the aisle to misery. My breathing was getting near panting, my body felt hot, way to hot.
"It's time Ms. Swan", I heard from the other side of the door. I wiped my face for the last time, got up from the leather couch and took a deep breath. There was nothing left to do but face the inevitable and do it with the little pride I had left and my head held high. I just didn't know if I was strong enough to do that.