Disclaimer: This story is for fun, and not for profit. That's what my day job is for. So, I'll just have to keep doing this, even though I don't own the characters. Universal Studios and Mark VII productions do.
Chapter 1: My Three Families
I have three Families. I am a very lucky Dog. Most Dogs only have one Family. And when they leave after the sun is up, they leave for a long time. At least that is what I remember from when I had just one family.
My three Families are here sometimes, but when the Noises happen they put on Big Fur and Hats and they leave. Sometimes they leave for a long time. Sometimes they leave and come right back. Sometimes the whole family leaves, and both Trucks are gone. Sometimes just two Men leave, and just Small Truck is gone. Sometimes four Men leave, and Big Truck is gone. I do not like the Noises.
I do not know what the Men do when they leave in Big Truck and Small Truck. Sometimes when the Men leave in Big Truck, they have a strange Smell when they come back. It is a Smell like Fire, but there is not a Fire on their Fur. Their Big Fur is sometimes wet with Water. Then the Men take turns in the Rain Box and then they do not Smell like anything.
Sometimes when the Men leave in Small Truck, they smell like Fear or even Blood when they come back. I do not like this. I try to push the Men to the Rain Box when they smell like this. Sometimes they are very sad when they smell like Fear or Blood. What I really do not understand is that sometimes when they smell like Fear or Blood they seem very happy. That is confusing to a Dog like Me.
When the sun comes up, one of my Families leaves, but another one is there before they leave. The Family that is leaving puts on the Fur they had when they came in the day before. The Family that is arriving puts on their Blue Fur. I do not understand this.
At my house there are six Beds and a Couch. The Couch is mine. Some of the Men let me sleep on a Bed with them. Some do not. Then I have to sleep on the Couch. That is okay.
The Men make Food two times when they are Home. Sometimes they make Food that they like, and I do not get much People Food. Sometimes they make food they do not like, and then a lot of People Food falls on the floor under the table. The rule is that if People Food is on the floor, it is Mine. Some of the Men make Food that has Fire in it. I do not like this Food. I do not like Fire that I cannot see or Smell. It hurts my mouth.
Sometimes the Men make Food, but then the Noises happen and the Men leave in Big Truck or Small Truck. They do not carry their Food in their mouths when they leave. They leave the Food on the table or in the Hot Box in the wall. I know it is not Mine if it is on the table. I always have Water in a Bowl. But I usually like to drink the Water in the Noisy Water Chair.
I am a lucky Dog because I have three Families in my Home. I will tell you about my favorite Family. There are six Men in all my Families. The six Men in my favorite Family are Alpha, Quiet One, My Favorite, Brown With Lip Fur, Puppy, and Puppy's Friend. I will tell you about these Men.
A/N: As promised, something Completely Different! Please R&R! Thanks!