Wow! So this is the end! Or at least the end of this particular foray into their world, but I promise, they're not gone yet! Their family will return, bigger and better, there are plenty more of them to come!
But before that, I am wading into the uncharted territories of their beginnings. Be on the look-out for 'College Confidential', likely to begin sometime in the June timeframe.
I want to give a huge thank you to every single person who's read/enjoyed/taken this ride with me and I hope you'll all come back for the next instalment!
Special thanks to: WitchyLove14, fire'n'water, AliceLuvr53, Sky King Haruka Tenoh, Emerald Demona, Zen,Juggler, doggie52191, gecoma,Santander, CurlyAkemy, Toyunique, ryanalone, Boris Yeltsin, obscure999, willara27, B.B-T.W-FUFFY-Calzona, GoldenSun13, WhatHurtsMeMost, kathybopeep, MirellaArabesque, Willowisanawesomename, PhoenixFalls, faolan228, Willoa-.-Tara, StephenPG, CaitrinMills, Dirty Tube Socks, little old me, 1songglory, ThinkImKindaGay, AstronSoul, LastHonestLook, andWiltara 4ever for being so kind as to leave me feedback. It is very appreciated! :)
6 Weeks Later
Willow rolled the volume dial on the baby monitor to the highest setting and left it on top of the dresser in their bedroom. She smiled at the small video panel in front that was focused on her sleeping daughter in the nursery and spent a few moments watching her gentle movements before Tara's voice from the doorway startled her.
"He was exhausted, I didn't even finish the first three pages before he was out," she said, closing the door softly and reaching behind to give herself a neck rub before looking around the quiet room in confusion, "Where's Robyn?"
Willow swallowed nervously and gestured at the baby monitor.
"I-I put her down in her crib."
"For the night?" Tara questioned with a raised eyebrow, "I didn't know we were trying her in separate rooms yet. She's only had a couple of afternoon naps in there."
"Well, I, um, we don't have to leave her there the whole night," Willow replied, tucking a piece of hair behind her own ear, "I just…wanted us to have a couple of hours…alone. Before she wakes up for her first feed."
Tara's brow creased in confusion at the sudden change in routine before suddenly realising what Willow meant.
"Only if you wanted," Willow added quickly.
Tara nodded keenly and strode across the room to her wife.
"Yes, yes, I…I really want," she replied emphatically, taking a tentative hold of Willow's waist, "Is…are you…?"
"I had my doctor's appointment when you took Robyn for her check-up this morning. All healed and good and…safe," Willow replied, biting the side of her lip, "And I was going to try and slip into something a little more in-the-mood-y, light a candle or two but I anticipated a full chapter night."
"I sang to him a little before we started," Tara offered as an explanation.
"Right," Willow nodded, wringing her hands nervously in front of her, "Um, I can still put something on…"
Tara rubbed her thumbs over the small patch of Willow's skin that was revealed between her pants and t-shirt.
"You look beautiful."
Willow looked down at the old pair of grey sweats hanging from her hips and the worn t-shirt, darker patches in various areas down the front.
"Milk stains…" she commented, frowning as she flicked at a slightly-bumpy white stain on her shoulder, "And I think that's oatmeal from this morning…"
Tara pulled Willow's hips so they bumped against her own and leaned down to nuzzle their noses, lowering her voice.
"You look beautiful."
Willow blushed and smiled coyly.
"Let me light the candles at least."
Tara smiled and moved around to embrace Willow from behind, tenderly kissing her neck as the redhead lit three of the candles that she'd taken from where they kept some in their nightstands.
"You smell good," Tara whispered as her teeth gently nipped her wife's skin.
Willow was about to voice that she was pretty sure she smelled like spit-up and breast milk but decided that it was time to switch off baby-mode and switch on wifey-mode. She covered Tara's hands on her hips and squeezed.
"Your hands are soft."
Tara let out a low, humming moan and pressed her fingers into Willow's skin before gently turning her and kissing her warmly. Willow felt a shiver go up her spine as they started to walk towards the bed together and broke free to push herself up to the top of the mattress.
Tara looked like she was about to climb in with her wife, but instead hung back and gave a crooked smile as she dropped her hands to the base of her shirt and started to slowly unbutton upwards.
Willow felt her breath hitch, fully enjoying being able to watch her wife undress without thoughts of diapers or school-runs or midnight feeds, and raked her eyes over the smooth torso and toned legs as Tara stripped down to just her bra and panties.
She started to giggle as Tara turned and did a little booty shake for her but then felt her heart plunge as a wave of uncertainty over her own changed body washed over her. She tried to push it away and appreciate the fact that Tara's perfectly round bottom was just inches away from her but struggled until she found herself with a familiar body hovering over and grinning down at her.
"This is nice," she ventured, her hands circling above Tara's back but never quite connecting, "You haven't fit on top of me in a while."
"Mmhh," Tara moaned, careful not to put any weight on Willow, and dropped her head into her wife's neck.
Willow's jaw clenched as Tara eagerly sucked and kissed her skin and she closed her eyes tight before sighing and pushing Tara's shoulders up a little when she felt hands start to pull her t-shirt up.
Tara slowly lifted her head and smiled bashfully.
"Sorry, I'm going too fast," she said, reaching a hand up to brush some hair from Willow's face, "I'll try to control myself but I can't make any promises around you."
She stuck her tongue out between her teeth with a lascivious look but it quickly faltered when Willow didn't smile back and her features softened.
"Willow, we don't have to do anything just because you can. We can wait until you're ready, there's no rush."
"I-I want to," Willow replied quickly, her gaze darting around for a few moments before meeting Tara's eyes vulnerably, "You know I haven't lost all...any...of the baby weight yet, right?"
Tara's mouth opened but quickly closed again as she leant down to place a very tender kiss on Willow's lips.
Willow's lips parted to welcome Tara's against her and felt a rush of warmth pass through her. Her eyes fluttered open to see Tara's already staring back and she exhaled slowly before sitting up, taking her wife with her, and lifted her arms over her head in offering.
Tara ran a single finger along her wife's jaw before slowly and carefully lifting Willow's t-shirt over her head. She kept her gaze locked with Willow's until it was on the floor, before letting herself look down to admire her wife's form.
Willow blushed under the lusty gaze that if anything was just more intense from any time she'd received it before and suddenly found herself overwhelmed with desire. Her own hands started to eagerly push her sweats off but Tara quickly took over, whipping them off and dropping her head to kiss all over her wife's stomach.
Willow fell back onto the bed, her breathing growing heavier and heavier as she squirmed under Tara's touch. Hands, though she couldn't tell whose, ridded them both of the last vestiges of their clothing, flying every which direction as their mouths hungrily devoured each other; meeting each other with an eagerness and desperation that they had been holding back from for many weeks.
Willow let herself be rolled onto her back and felt herself tingling from head to toe as Tara touched and kissed her everywhere until she felt a hand pulling her hip up and start to inch its way between her legs. She stilled her hand on Tara's back and tapped some fingertips along her wife's spine to get her attention.
"Hey, um, before we…" she trailed off a moment, one last thought plaguing her mind, "I pushed a baby out of there, okay? Things are gonna feel…different."
Willow expected, and needed, just a quick reassurance of what she already knew; that Tara would love her and loveher no matter what, but instead did a double-take in surprise when what she was given was a snort of laughter.
Tara's hands covered her mouth as soon as it happened and Willow looked on the verge of tears as she rolled onto her side, back to her wife. Tara internally kicked herself and lay down behind Willow, putting a cautious hand on her shoulder.
"Willow, I'm so sorry."
"No, that's fine," Willow replied tersely, shrugging the hand off, "We laugh at each other when we share our insecurities now, I'm glad I know that."
Tara's eyes creased and she reached over to insistently take her wife's hand.
"Please let me apologise," she pleaded, and Willow looked over to her with a stony but apparently listening face, "I'm so sorry. I wasn't laughing at you. I was laughing at what my foggy brain jumped to. Sleepy haze and baby haze and getting to touch you again haze…it's no excuse, but my brain is just…"
Willow gave a small nod of understanding but still looked hurt.
"Why was it even funny to begin with?"
"Because you married a woman," Tara replied with a grimace at her own train of thought, "And I can be…size-adjustable as necessary. I just wanted you to know that I can still make you feel good, we'll just take it slow and figure out what works. But I messed up and I'm really, really sorry."
Willow closed her eyes and sighed - she understood what the exhaustion and emotion was capable of. She turned onto her back and leaned up for a quick smooch.
"I get it. I forgive you," she said before her face scrunched and she exhaled slowly, "But I'm not worried about you making me feel good. I know you're going to make me feel good."
"What are you worried about?" Tara asked gently, holding up three fingers in a 'scout's honour' motion when she got a cautious look back, "I won't…ever again."
Willow nodded and reached for Tara's hand, playing with her fingers.
"I'm worried…I won't feel good. For you," she explained, looking down, "There'll be…looseness…and stuff."
"Oh, Willow," Tara replied softly, careful to think about her words this time, "That doesn't…You feel good to me because you're you."
Willow didn't look up so Tara cuddled in closer to her side and trailed a hand down her wife's body.
"Let me show you how good you feel to me."
Willow lifted her gaze and felt her heart begin to pound in her chest at the deep heat glazing in Tara's eyes. She shifted underneath her wife so their bodies pressed into each other and leaned up to kiss her softly.
She felt the last of her worries melt away as they relaxed into each other and slowly built up to heated touches and passionate kissing. Willow felt Tara purposely bypassing her breasts but could tell she wanted to touch her there by the ardent squeezes she was receiving in and around the area.
"You can touch my boobs but be careful around my nipples," she whispered, bumping Tara's hand encouragingly towards her breast, "Don't wanna squirt everywhere."
She waited for Tara to resume kissing her, but her wife just grinned down at her instead and she realised what she had said. She blushed and lightly hit Tara's shoulder.
"You're just naughty, you know that?"
"You're the one who said it," Tara replied with a wry smile.
"I was talking about the milk that feeds and nourishes our daughter," Willow responded indignantly, "You're the one who turned it into…"
She trailed off and started to chuckle at her own phrasing before feeling Tara's fingertips dancing on her stomach and her breathing grew heavy as she looked down and watched them slide down near her red curls.
Tara mistook the look for hesitance and paused.
"Are you scared?" she asked softly, only for Willow to smile, "What?"
"I just remember…asking you that. The very first time," Willow explained, then popped a kiss on Tara's lips as she echoed what had been said to her so many years before, "I trust you."
Tara smiled softly and dropped her head to take Willow's lips again. Her hand moved back up to take some gentle squeezes of her wife's breasts, the soft feel igniting her desire and she moved down to let her lips circle the fleshy globes.
Willow's back arched into Tara's touch and she gasped sharply as she felt wet heat glide against her thigh.
"T-Tara…" she moaned shakily feeling a clenching between her legs and a hot pressure in her abdomen, "Oh baby, I need you."
Tara licked a straight path from between her wife's breasts and into her neck, nipping at her pulse point as her hand quested lower. She began playing with the downy hairs and sucking assertively on her wife's soft skin, then raised her head to look into Willow's eyes as she let her fingers sink into the waiting wetness.
Willow gasped, her cheeks flushing and she opened her thighs a little.
"Does this hurt?" Tara asked gently.
Willow shook her head and rolled her hips to encourage the movements. Her fist opened and closed against the sheet as Tara tenderly stroked her and lightly rubbed the bump in her flesh.
"Tara…" she groaned, her body quickly becoming overwhelmed by the intense pleasure.
Tara watched Willow squirm and writhe, feeling more and more arousal building around her fingers.
"Do you want just this?" she asked softly, peppering Willow's shoulder-blade with kisses.
Willow's eyes fluttered open and she blushed at the dark, glassy eyes looking back at her. She leant over and gave Tara's shoulder the same treatment she was receiving.
"I want everything," she whispered, starting to sit as her lips continued their path up to Tara's jaw, "Is it okay if I'm on top? Gives me some more control."
Tara eagerly fell onto her back.
Willow grinned at the keenness and threw her legs over Tara's waist so she was straddling her. She felt Tara's hands come to rest on her hips and suddenly tensed, thinking that this was not a good position for her to be in when she was so worried about loose skin and sagging.
She was about to say she'd changed her mind and didn't want to be on top anymore when she felt Tara's fingertips dig into her skin and looked down to see her wife lustily staring at her form.
She squirmed at the intensity of the gaze and grinned.
"See something you like?"
Tara slowly looked up to meet Willow's gaze and smiled crookedly.
Willow bit her lip seductively and bucked her hips, feeling as sexy as she ever did around Tara.
"Then take it."
She felt her breath quicken steadily as Tara slowly teased her hand back between her legs and moaned as she finally connected. Her thighs trembled as she felt soft fingers glide against her until they were at her entrance and paused.
She let out a few short breaths, unsure how this was going to feel the first time since giving birth, before locking eyes with Tara and very slowly lowering herself.
She smiled in surprise when there was no pain and experimented with some gentle up-and-down movements, getting used to the feeling again. She looked to Tara who was smiling back at her full of love and adoration and reached out towards her.
"Other hand, please," she requested, wanting to hold it, then gulped as Tara just pushed herself up into a sitting position, so close that their noses were just touching each other, making her voice come out in a throaty whisper, "This is good."
Tara turned her head and grazed Willow's lips with her own, just barely caressing them for several seconds before finally fully taking them as she moved her hand inside for the first time.
Willow jolted, her arms flying around Tara's neck, and a deep moan rose from her throat, vibrating against her lips and into her wife's mouth. Her hips set a fast pace and Tara kept her movements gentle but in time.
Tara's own body was flushing with heat each time their chests thrust together without anything in the way; a sensation she'd very much been enjoying in the brief snapshots of time that they actually managed to steal a few minutes together to cuddle, but heightened to whole new levels in the intensity of their embrace.
Willow opened her mouth to let Tara take control of the kiss and watched her facial muscles twitch from her optimum viewing position right in front of her, enjoying the fact her wife was unaware she was doing so.
One hand fell from Tara's neck to her shoulder and down her arm, slipping behind to cup one of her buttock cheeks firmly before dancing around and inwards between her thighs, then suddenly entering her.
Tara's eyes flew open in surprise and Willow broke the kiss to grin at her, loving being able to shock her in such a way. Tara's eyelids grew heavy and they both stilled completely for a moment before starting again, hands moving in sync and foreheads rested together.
"Mmhh, Tara," Willow whispered after several minutes of soft kisses around each other's faces, "I'm…I'm…"
"I've got you," Tara whispered back, her chest heaving each time their hips hit against each other, "I'm with you."
Willow sought Tara's spare hand and held on tight as she started to crash, watching the pleasure shine in with the emotion in her wife's eyes. She bumped her Tara's nose affectionately as the final rush assaulted her body and mouthed 'I love you'. This seemed to send Tara over the edge as she began to shake, and their balance was lost; falling back onto the mattress in a sweaty, heaving heap.
"Sorry," Willow said hazily, pushing herself up on one elbow, "Did I hurt you?"
It took Tara an entire minute to respond, for the question to float into the right part of her brain and she shook her head before slowly opening her eyes.
Willow smiled softly and shook her head too.
"Not at all," she replied, leaning down to pop a kiss on her wife's lips, "You were so gentle."
"You…felt wonderful," Tara whispered, reaching down to entwine their fingers, "Your hands, and your lips, and your…everything."
Willow blushed and settled back down alongside Tara, tangling their legs and brushing some hair from her wife's face.
"Thank you. For being my missus."
Tara left a soft kiss on Willow's lips.
"Thanks for being mine."
She dropped her head to Willow's shoulder and held her tight, both of them enjoying the quiet embrace for several minutes before Tara felt a small shiver go up her wife's spine and sat up to lean down and get the blanket.
Robyn decided in that moment she'd given her parents enough of a stretch of peace and a soft wail rang out from the monitor on the dresser.
Tara retrieved the blanket quickly, then slipped from the bed, tucking Willow in before kissing her between the eyes affectionately.
"Rest. I'll get her."
"Bassinet is ready…" Willow commented lazily, "If you need to bring her in."
Tara smiled and nodded, dropping another quick kiss on Willow's nose before making her way towards the door. She grabbed her robe from the back of it on the way and wrapped it around herself. She quickly skirted down the hallway to the nursery and flicked on the light, going over to her fussing daughter and lifting her into her arms.
"Come here, sweet girl," she cooed softly, rocking her, "It's okay, Mommy's got you."
She patted the baby's diaper under her sleeping suit and determined it was still dry, though Robyn didn't seem to be comfortable just from being held; her cry low but consistent.
Tara walked around the room with her for a few minutes but when Robyn still didn't quieten, she went over to sit on the couch, relaxing back and cradling the baby.
Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Momma's gonna buy you a mockingbird.
And if that mockingbird don't sing, Momma's gonna buy you a diamond ring.
And if that diamond ring turns brass, Momma's gonna buy you a looking glass.
And if that looking glass gets broke, Momma 's gonna buy you a billy goat.
And if that billy goat doesn't pull, Momma's gonna buy you a cart and bull.
And if that cart and bull turns over, Momma's gonna buy you a dog named Rover.
And if that dog named Rover won't bark, Momma's gonna buy you a horse and cart.
And if that horse and cart falls down, you'll still be the sweetest little baby in town.
Robyn seemed captivated as the song finished and Tara smiled.
"Guess I should talk to your Momma before signing her up for all these expenses, huh?"
From the doorway, Willow smiled and felt her heart melt as she watched her wife interact with their daughter, having followed Tara out when she recognised Robyn's persistent 'hungry' cry, which started again just a moment later, Tara's singing only having acted as a temporary Band-Aid.
"I know, baby girl, you're hungry," Tara piped up again, "I'll bring you into your Momma."
Willow was about to make her presence known so that Tara didn't have to get up but had barely taken a step when she heard her wife speaking to the baby again, her tone changed.
"Hey, you know who I am, don't you?"
Willow's brow creased in confusion and continued to listen and watch as Tara tenderly stroked Robyn's cheek.
"I can't feed you like your Momma can…but you know who I am, right, sweetpea? You know I'm your Mommy?"
Willow stepped forward then, utterly confused at what she was hearing.
"Of course she does."
Tara's head snapped up in surprise and she cleared her throat.
"Willow, hi," she said, trying to act nonchalant, "I think she's hungry, diaper's clean."
Willow noticed the aversion tactic but decided Robyn being fed took priority for the moment. She went over and slipped into the space beside her wife, pulling the top of her robe open enough to expose her breast and took the baby, positioning her at her nipple.
"Do you need any help?" Tara asked softly.
Willow shook her head.
"They're still hard from…" she trailed off with a blush before smiling down at the baby as she latched on straight away, "Good girl."
She watched Robyn feed for a moment before casting a sidelong glance at Tara who was watching the same thing. There was a quiet minute before Willow spoke softly.
"You can tell me," she said, her tone tender before she bumped Tara's shoulder playfully, "I won't laugh like certain people I could mention."
Tara looked down but with a smile, then raised her head again to rest her chin on her wife's shoulder.
"I guess I just feel sometimes…we had equal footing with JJ…and you've got this whole special bond with her that I just can't share," she explained, before quickly adding, "I don't resent it for a second. I love watching you feed her. Sometimes I just have…moments…where I think she might think you're her mother…and I'm just this lady that hangs around to get her mother when she's hungry."
Willow felt her heart break for a moment and dropped a lingering kiss onto the side of Tara's head.
"She knows exactly who you are," she said firmly but saw hesitance still on Tara's face, "She does. She even has her 'Mommy' cry."
Tara lifted her head, confused.
"Her Mommy cry," Willow stated as if it was obvious, "She has her hungry cry, and her wet cry and her tired cry and her very-particular, high-pitched squeal of a Mommy cry, where nothing but a Mommy cuddle will do."
Tara rolled her eyes, thinking Willow was placating her.
"She doesn't have a 'Mommy' cry."
"You bet your butt she does," Willow replied emphatically.
Tara's eyebrow raised in questioned.
"Why don't I notice it?"
"You do," Willow replied before smiling tenderly, "You don't even see it. The moment the Mommy cry comes out, you drop whatever you're doing and run."
Tara looked down at Robyn, wanting to believe what her wife was saying was true, then felt a hand pressing lightly against her belly.
"She came from you, Tara."
Tara looked down, then back up to Willow.
"Exactly," Willow smiled softly, "She came from both of us. She's our baby girl."
Tara managed a little smile, then suddenly found Willow herself into shuffling into her lap.
"C'mere," she said softly, "Do you want to hold her while she feeds?"
Tara gently wrapped her arms around Willow and the baby from behind, holding Robyn in place. She looked up at Willow, her eyes shining with deep love.
Willow leaned over and pressed a sweet kiss to Tara's lips, then they both watched Robyn feed again. After a few moments, footsteps were heard in the hallway and Willow covered her breast up and slipped from Tara's lap just as JJ came into the room, rubbing his eyes sleepily.
"I'm sorry honey, did we wake you?" Tara asked him as he walked over to them in his Spiderman pyjamas.
JJ climbed into Tara's lap and rested his head on her chest.
"I had to pee."
"Did you go?" Tara asked and he nodded.
JJ closed his eyes and snuggled into Tara's chest. Willow smiled at him, then over at Tara.
"She's almost done, we can settle them both back then."
Tara nodded in agreement and started to soothingly stroke JJ's hair until Robyn stopped feeding and just a few split seconds later, began to cry again. JJ sighed and started to make his way into Willow's lap.
"Hey, where are you going?" Tara asked, having enjoyed the cuddle time.
"She only cries like that when she wants you, Mommy," JJ replied, not opening his eyes as he settled as best he could around Willow.
Willow grinned triumphantly at Tara and leaned over to pass the baby off.
"I told you. She loves her Mommy."
"I love my Mommy," JJ piped up sleepily from around his thumb.
Willow grinned more and decided to add to the mix.
"I love their Mommy."
Tara beamed as Robyn stopped crying almost as soon as she got a good hold on her.
"And I love you all, my sweet, sweet family."
Willow joined the trend of closed eyes as she moved to rest her head on Tara's shoulder as Robyn was settled over the other to burp.
"Who needs a bed? Looks like I've got a ready-made snuggle emporium right here."
"Watch out," Tara warned playfully, "We'll start charging admission."
"I'll gladly pay," Willow replied, turning her head to smile up at her wife, "Name your price."
Tara pretended to think.
"Five hugs an hour, three squeezes and a kiss."
"Done," Willow responded without hesitation, leaning up to pop a kiss on Tara's cheek, "And that was for free."
Tara smiled and left an answering kiss on Willow's temple before hearing a quite sound come from the baby. She brought Robyn back to her chest and beamed quietly to herself when she saw her nod off almost straight away.
"She has a Mommy cry."
Willow shifted a little, careful not to disturb JJ who appeared to have followed his sister into dreamland, and fully immersed herself into Tara's side, claiming full cuddle potential.
"We couldn't cope without you, none of us."
"Well you'll never have to," Tara promised, carefully balancing the baby in one arm while wrapping the other around Willow.
JJ seemed to stir but didn't waken, instead just settling down across both women's laps, entwining them all together in an embrace. Willow let out a deeply satisfied murmur and closed her eyes again in contentment.
"So is there an entry card I get to this snuggle emporium? I wouldn't want to be denied entry."
Tara's lips quirked up to one side, deciding this was ranking high in the list of perfect moments in her life. A soft kiss was dropped on each forehead of the three people who filled her life with so much joy and Willow was gifted with the affectionate smile, being the only other one still awake to enjoy it.
"You get the lifetime pass."