John Druitt was ready to murder someone.

He sat rigid on the worn couch, holding baby Ashley, and being forced to watch the most disgusting piece of filth ever.


Everything was sunshine and rainbows on this children's 'educational' program. The protagonist in the show (if he could be called that) was a bald four-year-old, who faced very simple problems he overcame slowly and with much difficulty, in a colorful simplistic world with little worries or trouble. How far this was from the truth! Why disillusion the youth into believing the real world was like this, that everyone you met were honest folk who would help you with anything, that the most important skills to be learned were rudimentary manners and simple science facts! This world made him sick, for he had experienced so thoroughly the darkest parts of the real world that was such an opposite of the colorful land he was being forced to watch. And that nagging point- why was a four year old bald? Had he suffered from cancer? It couldn't be genetic, Caillou's father had a full head of unnatural auburn hair.

But, he was being forced to watch by the simple fact that Ashley, who was currently bouncing merrily on his lap was enjoying it. He didn't know if he should be disappointed that his daughter was enjoying this, but then again she was two. He supposed she was the targeted age range for their program...but still.

You can do this, he told himself. You've been through much worse. Ashley was happy at least, she was gaping wide-eyed at the dancing figures on the screen, blissfully unaware of the utter torment her father was going through.

Then they started singing.

It was the theme song, a new episode must have started.

I'm just a kid who's four, each day I learn some more, I'll share it with you I'm CAILLOU

His dark hatred of this pathetic excuse for entertainment was quickly escalating to plotted murder of the 'writers' of the show, when he was distracted.

His beautiful Helen came into the room, and plopped down ungracefully right next to him. She watched a few seconds of the show, before wrinkling her nose in disgust and grabbing the channel changer, cutting off the last few bars of the theme song. It flipped to the news.

"I love you Ashley, but you are not watching that garbage. Watching the paint dry is more educational." Helen said to the pouting Ashley. Helen then turned to a relieved John. "How much of that did you endure?"

"It all was blurry after the second episode. Ashley enjoyed it though."

Helen looked immensely grateful, and leaned in for a kiss. "Thank you." She said.

As he returned the kiss with a soft You're Welcome, the world for a brief moment seemed like a more sunshine and rainbow place.

Though still not to the extent depicted in Caillou.

A/N It is midnight. I apologize for this story. I didn't want to publish it, but my friend *cough Surreal Squirrel *cough* made me.

SS: Foooooofull.

Me: *begins to rhyme foofull*

So. Yeah. This is a bad entry for the Delen forum challenge. I promise the other entries put in by other peeeeeeeople are better than mine, check it ouuuut!