Somewhere within her, a wall came crumbling down, and she returned the kiss wholeheartedly. Feeling his breath hitch in his throat as their tongues worked in complimentary motions this time, she pulled him down on top of her, massaging the corded muscle of his back, dipping her fingers just beneath the waistline of his pants.
Pulling her upwards, he rid her of her shirt, the playful spring breeze blowing their hair about, twisting and tangling it together as they returned to each other's mouths.
Forcing him back onto his knees, Lightning worked at the rest of his clothing quickly, wanting to see all of him exposed to her. Deft fingers pulled at the buckle of his belt, spying the substantial bulge under his pants. She couldn't keep from palming him over top of the fabric, delighting in how his stomach tightened as she cupped and rubbed his confined length.
It felt good to touch a man again, especially one that wanted her so badly. She was no blushing virgin, and as such, she found that she longed to feel the heat of a man inside her. Too busy trying to hide her emotions, or kill them at best, and the joy of being a woman was lost to her. All the things she learned from him, all the empowerment and feelings of womanly self-confidence he helped her develop had been willed away in an attempt to keep those memories of Brigadier General Cid Raines sealed.
When she locked out the love, only the pain and resentment remained.
But it was better than being weak.
Pressing experimental kisses against the sculpted muscle of the blond's stomach while she felt him twitch strongly against her hand, his own breathy sounds caught in the breeze from the window. Manipulating the buttons on his pants open, her heart hammered in her chest as she moistened her lips.
She had to see him, wanted to know him like few others did.
Snow wasn't as suave as Cid had been. He didn't whisper honey-laden words or know just the touch to make her beg for more. Physically they were also quite dissimilar. Although similar in height, Cid was dark-haired, his skin strikingly pale, deceptively fragile looking with long, lean muscles; Snow had wild blond hair and was tanned, bulky and thick; healthy and virile.
As her lips brushed against his heated skin, she thought that perhaps it wasn't fair of her to want to expose him, while she remained covered. In fact, it was cowardly of her to force that upon him. She always called the shots; was always in charge of every aspect of her life... And in the end, she wanted him to look at her; apart from all the cruel words and disapproving tone.
So many times he offered himself... maybe not in this way... but she felt it was time for her to return the favour.
Shuffling backward, she unclasped her bra, and pulled it off. Goosebumps rose on her skin, her nipples stiffening as the breeze blew across her torso. Snow's eyes widened slightly, his gaze sweeping over her, eagerly appreciating the bold tactic she displayed.
"I've... never needed anyone before..." she admitted, not entirely knowing what she meant by the statement when she uttered it. Perhaps it was, in its duality, a display of both dominance and submission, both telling and asking.
Wiggling out of her pants and underwear, she tossed them aside, a soft pink triangle of curls concealing the swollen mound between her legs. Kneeling before him, she let him get a good look at her, clasping her hands behind her back to keep them from covering herself, wondering where all that feminine power Raines had instilled in her went when she needed it most.
It was the sound of his husky voice that begged her to look at him.
"I have..." Snow whispered, cupping her face, kissing her gently again like he did back in the hallway. His continued words barely skimmed her lips. "...and ...I do."
It was a long moment before she was able to understand the sounds he strung together, slowly building the words in her head; the honesty in his kisses having rendered her higher brain functions useless.
"Snow..." she started weakly, her own words stolen when she saw him undressing himself.
First the pants went, then the shorts; his once cramped manhood standing almost painfully erect, but straight and proud. Unlike her, he didn't shy away or almost succumb to modesty...
Throat dry, she couldn't take her eyes off him... off it. He was most definitely the most well-endowed man she'd ever seen, not that her list was long... but Raines had been more than enough for her.
Snow was going to be a... stretch.
Before she could give that anymore thought, he was assaulting her sweetly with his hands, fondling and appreciating her waist, her hips, her rounded backside... leaving excited, raised flesh in their wake.
His tongue and lips laved affection on the gentle curve of her neck and shoulders. Her fingers curled in his hair, keeping his head flush against her skin urging that hot mouth of his to her aching breasts. He wasted no time in giving her exactly what she wanted and when her nipple slipped past his lips, his tongue flicked back and forth firmly, drawing a long shiver from her. That eager mouth of his descended on her other breast, her hands knotted tightly in his hair. His deep, engaged moan reverberated through her flesh where he was attached to her, thrumming the tightness that had been building inside her ever since he first kissed her. Nipping the hardened bud with his teeth, she hissed in pleasure.
Lightning pushed down his head, needing him somewhere more urgent, but he didn't give in. Instead, her breast was halfway engulfed in the heat of his mouth before her arms turned to jelly, forgetting their fight, and he won.
Working his way up her chest, he was noisy, the wet, salacious sounds delicious in her ear.
She couldn't see, her eyelids too heavy to keep open, but she felt him against her; his thick, hard member rubbing against her thigh. She hadn't exactly forgotten it was there, but he was pretty good with his hands, so she hadn't missed it until now. Righting her head from it's lolled back position, her lusty eyes opened just in time for a hand to squeeze her hip, urging it forward until he drove his hardened length easily between her dripping thighs. She gasped in surprise, and he captured her mouth with his, rubbing himself against plumped lips. Her body undulated of its own accord, enjoying his engorged column sliding against her, slicking him up.
Feeling his body moving against hers, seeking pleasure and comfort, she could do little else but acquiesce, clenching her thighs together in some sort of desperate rhythm. At some point the kiss had broke, and she found herself panting brokenly against his chest. Slim hands sunk themselves into coarse blond hair again and Lightning pulled his mouth down to hers, moaning in tandem while they worked against one another, finding vacant mouths to swallow one another's sounds.
If there was anything Lightning would remember for the rest of her life, it was his warmth. Not just in how he touched her, but the way he was physically warm, like a great big blanket as he positioned himself above her.
Walking the length of his jaw, he smiled down at her, kissing that fingertip as it passed over his lips and down his chest, her hands finally tracing the line of his chest and stomach, all tight, hot, hard muscle.
His masculinity was intoxicating.
Raines had always been cool. His body always controlled, performing in a calculated manner, he never snapped, never was anything but composed in front of everyone, including her. Even during their most passionate lovemaking, his hands... they stayed cool. No matter how much she melted beneath those hands... he remained a separate entity.
He was a pretty item she had fleeting possession of – never warming as she held him; like he never belonged to her; like he wasn't meant to.
Snow felt different. Their bodies melded together. You could almost see the heat rising from their skin.
Raines had always appealed to her femininity, bringing out the strong woman in her, telling her that she should always rely on herself; believe in herself; be independent, but in that moment, she wanted the comfort Snow offered very plainly between his own legs.
She wanted it... she needed it... needed to feel something alive and passionate swell in her again.
Tilting her hips forward, she allowed her legs to fall open, and he began to settle into her parted thighs, stroking himself thoughtfully – perhaps a bit hesitantly – before she felt him nudge against her. Smooth, slick skin rubbed teasingly against her lips, prodding her entrance, then running the full length of her sex and back. He explored her folds sensually, pillowed by each side as he drug his blunt, scorching tip through her slick salve, an uncontrolled gasp escaping him.
It surprised her to hear his husky voice; to see his lips part... eyes shut tightly in concentration, but more than that, it caused something inside her to clench involuntarily. He was incredibly sexy above her fighting against the inevitable... holding onto something...
In that moment, it wasn't just all about her, and her pleasure...
She wanted it to be about him too. He wasn't there for her... they were there for each other.
She knew how he felt when Serah left him, but she gave him no comfort, no compassion. And he had no idea what had happened to her to turn her so cold... and yet, even though he was clueless, all he had wanted to do was help.
Sneaking her hand down her belly, she wrapped her fingers around his slippery head, stroking it gently before placing it at her aching passage.
Their eyes met.
Without breaking eye contact, he placed her small hand on top of his, somewhere midway down his thick shaft and pushed himself into her.
Lightning felt herself spread; couldn't help her eyes when they widened, feeling the thickest part of his head push into her and be accepted with a thrilling clench. The last thing she saw was his eyes almost scrutinizing her face before they shut and he filled her only so far... His guiding fist controlled his depth, as he began to move, their fingers encircling him rubbing maddeningly against her swollen entrance.
Making a mental note not to go such a long time without doing this again, she still felt the dull stretch of his manhood inside her, even though she was so thoroughly aroused. After shallow thrusts, still tempered by his hand, he pulled out of her, leaving her feeling gaping and empty.
But that feeling was thankfully short-lived.
With his hands supporting himself on either side of her, his reentry was blissful, thrusts still shallow and controlled, though he was biting his lip, his eyebrows furrowed in intense concentration.
She wasn't sure if it was her own throbbing she felt or if it was his inside of her, but his caution was driving them both insane with need; of that she was sure. It wasn't that it was unpleasant; far from it. It just wasn't enough.
Wrapping her legs around his backside, she savagely bucked her hips, taking him to the hilt as they both gasped. Snow's face screwed up atop her, and she kissed him, needing a distraction from the thorough filling of her heat. He remained unnaturally stiff, not even returning her kiss and she felt his body quake, his elbows close to buckling.
Snow began to pant raggedly, a curse dropping from his lips and against hers.
Raines never cursed... and never, ever, lost complete control.
A wicked little smile curled across her lips, and she pushed her tongue into Snow's mouth.
With a hungry growl, he pulled her into his lap, his own legs folded beneath him. Without giving her a chance to settle, his hands closed around her waist, snapping his hips to thrust into her heat as she grappled onto him. Letting herself be bounced in his lap, she was thrilled when he sought out her mouth with his own.
She was so full. That's all she could think as she took him in over and over again. It had been borderline painful at first, but seeing that look of surprise and desperate need on his face had been enough of a distraction, and a turn on, that now all she felt was the pressure and pleasure.
Securely latched onto him, his hands flew all over her body, never over the same place twice in an attempt to feel all that he could of her. Clinging to him, their chests slid over one another's, a thin sheen of sweat beginning to cover their bodies. The breeze took some of their heat with it as it swirled around them, only to be gulped in greedily as they refused to let their mouths fully part.
Drunk on the power of being his undoing, wild movements, and frenzied motions, she could feel bliss creeping up on her. But keened when he stopped moving completely.
"I..." he panted "I... can't keep that up... You've got me so... close already..."
Ok, so maybe they had to work on his stamina a little... Though, this gave her the opportunity to take over the encounter and that thought made her seize around him. He sucked in a tight breath, sounding as though he might have been in some physical pain. The soldier decided it was time for a change of pace.
Hands on his chest, she shifted her weight pushing him backwards onto the bed. He yelped when he bounced slightly on the mattress and they knocked foreheads.
"Ow..." He chuckled, the tension that marred his face a second ago gone.
Lightning scowled, rubbing her fingertips over her brow. "Thick headed bastard..."
Her comment made him laugh even more and the more he laughed, the harder it got for her to maintain her frown. Giving in, she chortled quietly. For a moment they laughed together at the silly little mishap; the first real laugh Lightning had experienced in a long while.
But she didn't notice when he stopped suddenly, still chuckling despite herself. Eventually she realized he wasn't laughing anymore, and embarrassment dusted her cheeks.
He was giving her that look again.
"Why... does it always feel as though you can see through me...?"
His eyes squinted in thought for a moment before he answered.
Brushing the backs of his knuckles over her damp cheek, he threaded his hand into her hair, his fingers running down the wavy length that fell over her unblemished shoulder.
"I think that..." he fixed his gaze on that shoulder as he continued "...you've lost something. Like I have." his voice dropped when he looked back to her. "I can see it."
She didn't know what he'd say to that question. A serious answer is what she wanted most, but what she least expected.
Snow, of all people, was absolutely right.
Tears sprung to her eyes for the third time that night.
"Hey, hey..." he cooed.
Grasping her head gently between his hands, he brought it down to press featherlight kisses all over her face even though her tears dripped onto his cheeks.
"I didn't mean to make you cry again..."
For the moment, she just let herself go... let herself be honest with him. She obviously didn't need to say anything, she'd never given him enough credit – or any for that matter – when it came to anything important. She felt guilty as hell on all sorts of levels now.
But a couple compassionate caresses of his lips on hers brought her around again to realize he was still nestled inside of her.
Possibly the only person in the world that understood her was beneath her honest, weeping, pathetically needy body. Parting their mouths, she pressed a set of kisses down his jawline, and across his collarbone. Straddling his wide hips, she wiggled her backside ever-so-slightly, hearing him suck in a hasty breath.
For now she wanted to forget. There would be time later to apologize for all the awful things she said and did; all those things he didn't deserve from her.
Exploring his smooth, tanned skin with her tongue, he lay vulnerable; totally open to her. During her unhurried exploration, she set a steady pace with her hips, grinding against him, her own breaths short. Finding the perfect angle all on her own, she panted against his chest, his hands trailing along the nape of her neck, stroking lovingly.
The back of her neck tingled pleasantly, that feeling trickling down into her groin, her head already swirling as she neared her release. Clenching her jaw, she sat up on him to take him deeper, his hands immediately cupping her breasts, working on ruthlessly on circling her nipples.
Lightning's body flushed with a final heat, and suddenly everything; the breeze, his hands, his thickness inside her, her heartbeat almost bursting through her chest all bled into one perfect feeling of euphoria as she cried out, quivering deliciously as her orgasm took her.
Once her clenching around him slowed, she sunk into his chest once again, spent, tonguing and sucking on one of his nipples half-heartedly. Regaining her senses rather quickly, she began to move her hips again, impaling herself easily on him after the gush of passion between her legs, tightening her passageway.
Peeking at his face, he had his bottom lip trapped cutely between his teeth, his eyes clamped shut while she worked. She couldn't help but stifle a smile.
He speared her firmly a couple more times before manhandling her thighs and slipping out of her, his member pulsating between the firm cheeks of her buttocks while he shuddered and groaned deeply in his throat.
Without making a presentation of it, he slipped back inside her, his softening length still stiff enough to make her hum in appreciation. His lazy hands trailing up and down her back turned her spine to pudding, her body completely boneless after such a pent up release...
Unsure of how she was able to still think, Lightning found that those thoughts floated back to Raines. Before Snow, she'd only ever had one man. And that man was a hell of a man to measure up to, but she realized that they didn't have to measure up to each other.
Cid was the leading man in another life, but it was clear to her, only now, that Snow could be her leading man...
... If he would have her.
Somehow being with Snow felt impossibly right.
Perhaps it was true that she'd never forget about her first love and maybe it would always sting when she thought about him. Some people were lucky enough to be able to be with their first love forever... but, like her, most of the time people just had to move on.
Lightning Farron never believed she would love again, and it would take the love of a good man to help her. Time would heal all wounds; although this time, she wouldn't be afraid to let him help her.
Snow hummed in acknowledgement, twisting a piece of rose coloured hair between his fingertips.
"Can I tell you a secret...?"