A/N: Alrighty folks! I'm back in the groove of things. I've got most of this story finished now so updates are coming hopefully every day? There isn't much left of the story and I thank all of those who have stuck around to review, favorite, and follow this! Please enjoy!
Over a week went by and I was progressing pretty well on my training. I had overcome the anger sensations really well and now had full control over my fire and electricity balls.
"Hey Embry," I said as Chris and I came walking back from practicing magic. "Piper and the girls are calling for me, I'll be back in a bit," Chris said kissing me quickly. Saying goodbye, I watched him orb off before sitting next to my imprinter on the steps.
"So what's up?" I wondered.
"Just thinking," he commented.
"Anything you want to share?" I asked, bumping shoulders with him.
"It's already end of July," he commented, "school will start soon."
"Yea," I breathed somewhat amazed. Time flew by.
"I wish you could stick around here," he said softly.
"It's not like we won't work things out," I spoke, "We'll see each other."
"When?" he scoffed.
"Embry come on," I said with a small whine, "its not like I will always be busy. I can orb, and call things to me. We'll have some time to spend with each other- the imprint will be fine."
"I'm not-…is that what you think this is?" he wondered.
"What?" I asked confused.
"Bella, its not just the imprint that makes me want you to stay. I like you for you, no magic in between. I just thought…we had a friendship," he grumbled softly.
"Yea, I know we do," I said still slightly bewildered, "and what I'm saying still applies. We will see each other."
"You made it clear you're never coming back to La Push though," he sighed. I braced myself knowing where this was going now. The conversation was more about Sam and I than anyone else.
"Embry don't okay? I don't want to go there. You know how I feel about him," I spoke.
"Bella come on though," he whined, "how much are you going to hassle the guy? Hasn't he had enough?"
"Not nearly," I returned with a tone of disgust, "I can't face him. I can barely look at him. Embry, I don't have enough in me to forgive him." Calming myself, I glanced at him, "I'm sorry, I just don't."
"Can't you try?" he wondered with little hope.
"Honestly, I don't want to," I spoke. "I'm tired of trying. I'm tired of the one always coming to him- no one would know me here if I didn't come to La Push. Do you see that?"
"But he is trying to get forgiveness," Embry said.
"How?" I asked. "By opening his house to me? Yea, well it was our parent's so it's partially mine. So is he doing it by following my every decision? No. He puts himself, the alpha, before anything. I don't have to remind you of the vampire situation last week. So what does he do Embry? Besides pleading with me for forgiveness he doesn't try to do anything to show he earns it."
"It doesn't mean he doesn't deserve forgiveness though," he said weakly.
"I know, and sometimes I wish I could forgive him. But then I remember the lies and everything he's put me through. There's only so much one person can take."
"Even though he lied for your own sake?" Embry asked.
"He could have told me when I came back here," I said, "he knew I was old enough to take it."
"Please stop putting yourself in the middle of Sam and I. I don't want us to-…I just don't want that."
"I'm just trying to help."
"You're help would be to be a bystander like everyone else. I get that he is your alpha and you have to listen to him- I don't have a problem with that, but in the role where he's my brother I need you to step back and be neutral."
"But it's upsetting you too," he quipped.
"It always will," I admitted, "as much as I dislike him and want to hate the guy, he's still my brother. And I love him, I think that's what kills me and fuels my anger even more. After all he's put me through, I still love him."
"Which is why it would be easier to forgive him," Embry spoke slowly.
"That's taking the easy way out. It shows that I gave in because I was weak. I'm not doing that. I'm not going back on my words just for me- it's not fair to the either of us."
Staring out in the sky, I patted his leg and got up. "Come on, I'm sure Emily is inside cooking dinner."
"Hey Em!" I called walking in the house. Moving to the kitchen, I found a large mess, which could be interpreted as a struggle and no one around to disprove my thought.
"Em?" I called again. Starting to panic, I looked to Embry. Fuck.
"Bella?" a sweet voice called. Snapping to look at the stairs, I found her coming down, looking like a mess. She had an ice pack over her arm, her shirt was full of red sauce and she carried a few towels.
"What the heck happened to you?" I wondered.
"I accidentally had a catastrophe in the kitchen," she sighed.
"Yea, I guess so," I said watching her walk the rest of the way down.
"Embry, will you go clean that up?" she asked giving him towels. He nodded and kissed her cheek.
"So how'd you do it?" I asked. "You had me in a panic."
"Sorry," she said giving me a hug. "I went to go pull the large pot of tomato sauce off the stove when I realized my bread was burning and with two things at once I accidentally dropped the pot on reflex and ended up burning myself."
"Ouch," I stated. "Let me see." Moving the ice pack from her forearm, I saw it all red and blistering.
"Eww," I stated and then moved my hand over the injury to heal it.
"You're a lifesaver," she sighed feeling much better.
"Actually, I'm more like you're on call healer," I smirked. The two of us laughed and walked into the kitchen to help Embry.
"What happened here?" Piper said orbing into the house with Chris.
"Hey Piper," I smiled turning back around from cleaning up the floor.
"Did you guys just have a food fight?" Paige asked orbing in the hall with Phoebe.
"No, just a spill," I said laughing as Emily was blushing slightly.
"Emily?" Sam asked calling in the house. All went silent except for the loving wife who responded to his call.
"What happened?" he asked immediately.
"I just had a cooking spill," she answered again. "Don't worry I'm fine," she said reading his face, "Bella fixed me up."
"You did?" Phoebe asked.
"What happened to no more magic here," Phoebe asked trying to impersonate me.
"Real smooth," I said at the terrible impersonation.
"And that's all gone. There is a war coming here and it's not my fault so might as well use what I can," I grumbled.
"Thank you," Sam said looking to me while having Emily wrapped in his arms.
"Don't mention it," I mumbled.
"Bella," he sighed.
"Really," I pushed, staring at him for once, "don't mention it."
Sam sighed again, along with a little noise from Embry.
"So what brings my family here?" I asked changing the subject.
"We came to check out your training," Piper answered, "Chris said you've been doing well."
"You came all the way here for that?"
"And this," Paige said holding up the book of shadows. "There are some more spells we should try here."
"Okay," I sighed. Throwing the dishtowel near the sink, I moved towards them.
"Bella, what about dinner?" Sam asked. I made a face but Piper gave me a look to answer him.
"I'll grab some scraps when I get back."
He went to protest but Emily thankfully shut him up for me. Dinner wasn't ready anymore anyways.
"You know, I would be happy to help you," Piper added towards Emily.
"Piper," I groaned out.
"What?" she asked defensively. "I've cooked for a ton of people before."
"That's not why im 'Piper-ing' you," I gritted out. She gave me a scolding look and turned back to Emily.
"That would be wonderful," Emily smiled with her own thank you.
"Awesome!" I said throwing my hands up in sarcasm.
"Bella," Piper scolded.
"Fine," I said, "I'm going out. You know where to find me," I murmured.
"Bella," Chris said walking after me.
"No," I groaned out to the air. "I know what's really trying to happen here and I don't want any part with it. I don't want these worlds to mix, do you understand? Having them come here and play family get together is the worst thing possible."
"They're bonding," he stated.
"I know!" I said throwing my hands up, "and it's disgusting. I don't need that here. I get to leave in a little over a month."
"Bella," he scolded, "there is a war coming."
"And?" I asked impatiently as we fought out in the front yard.
"We should be bonding. We are trusting each other with our lives. It's something we need to do. It's not just about you and what you want."
I felt like I had just been invisibly slapped. Chris has never said anything like that to me.
"Oh," I said taken back.
"What I mean is that bonding is okay and everyone understands you are leaving. That's not the only reason why this is happening."
"Right," I said disconnecting myself from him. Moving backwards, I began to walk off again.
"Don't even try following Chris," I said not even looking back at him. I heard him give a large sigh and I shook my head. Life seriously sucked.
I wandered around La Push for a while. Everything was aggravating to me. I was super sensitive and on edge because of all this shit between Sam and I, and the war coming up made it worse. What happened to just being here because of college? Shouldn't my last summer before adulthood be fun and free?
Sitting on the large rocks, I gave a groan and put my head on my knees. Stupid family issues and this damn world.
"Bella right?" a voice called to me. Turning back I found that girl Sasha I had once caught in my hands looking alive and healthy. Well, for as much as a dead, inhuman person could look anyway.
"Yea, Sasha?" I acknowledged. She nodded and drifted over to me.
"I see you have officially stuck to the diet," I commented, as her eyes were a nice shiny golden.
"Yea," she chuckled sitting by me now.
"What are you doing here?" I sighed.
"Came to clear my thoughts," she said looking to the water and then me. "You?"
"Same," I said.
"How's it working?" she asked.
"Not well at all," I muttered with a small chuckle. "You?"
"Pictured it to be better," she smiled.
"What's your problem?"
"Controlling family," Sasha said looking to her lap, "and boyfriend," she added tilting her head.
"Who are you dating?" I asked.
"That copperhead, Edward," she said. I nodded, vaguely remembering him.
"What about you?" she sighed.
"Family drama," I stated, "I was adopted so now both families are coming together and getting all warm and cozy."
"That's weird," she said.
"Tell me about it," I muttered.
"So a dominating boyfriend?" I asked changing topics. "Shouldn't you get yourself out of that relationship?"
She chuckled, "he's my mate."
"So?" I asked lost.
She laughed again, "Vampires mate for life."
"But you guys…like…never die," I stated. She gave me a pearly white smile and nodded.
"Wow, yours sucks more," I said. Dealing with the same guy in a relationship for eternity? You couldn't just walk out or break up because you have to spend the rest of your life with the man…or woman.
"He just doesn't like being here," she sighed.
"Because of the wolves?"
She looked surprised to me and nodded. "I'm still new at this whole family diet thing and he's worried about what could happen."
"Don't worry, I have your back," I said.
"No I mean," I said cutting her off, "the Alpha of the tribe is my brother."
"Samuel Uley is your brother?" She asked incredulous.
"Unfortunately so," I grumbled. "You seem like a good person…or vampire I guess. As long as you don't go on some rampage and abide by the treaty, I'm sure I can convince the guys not to be so uptight."
"Thank you," she smiled. I nodded, "The guys' aren't too bad when you get to know them."
"They don't seem like it," she said with encouragement, "I mean, they seem nice but very protective of their kind."
"Aren't we both?" I asked. She lifted a shoulder thoughtfully and nodded.
"So then family troubles with the wolves?" she wondered.
"My brother is a dick," I stated.
"But…" she said confused to what I just said.
"The wolves of his pack aren't but I'm declaring my brother one," I said. She laughed and said okay.
"He hid things from me, about our past. And I'm mad at him for it."
"Well, it's the past," she said like it was simple, "it shouldn't ruin the present."
"It was about our parents," I said. She 'oh'ed and went quiet. "They were killed by vampires and Sam knew that. But he lied to me and said it was a car crash."
"How did you find out?" she wondered.
"Long story short," I said with a small chuckle to my inside joke, "I put it together after learning about the worlds. I pushed it on Sam practically yelling in his face and he gave up and told me the whole story."
"Wow," she said. "I'm sorry, that must be rough."
"More than you know," I sighed.
"Well you can't be mad at him forever right?" she asked me.
"I can try," I muttered.
She gave a sigh and looked at me. "Bella, something about living forever and seeing the people around you die, it puts life into perspective." Her lips uplifted a bit and she patted my leg.
"He's you're brother, and even though he did something bad and totally messed up, you have to forgive him at one point, because when it all comes down to it, he's your family- your blood."
This time, it was me who sighed. She had a point but I was so mad I wanted to hold onto it. It was something that fueled me and kept me focused. Did I really want to lose that?
"You seem like a great girl," she pitched, "but there's a time you need to let go all of that anger you have bottled up inside and chalk it up to just another day in this crazy life. People don't live forever, and nobody likes to have a dark cloud always hanging over them."
"Well what about you?" I asked. "You're upset with Edward and the rest of the Cullens. Maybe you should take some of your own advice."
"Very true," she said going back to stare out into the water.
"Can I say something?" I asked. She nodded.
"I think that…even though the Cullens might be a little on edge and overprotective, you have to see that they are worried for you. When I caught you in my hand, before I could really even say anything, they were pleading for me not to hurt you. You may be a one of the few creatures that live for eternity and have seen a lot of death, but so have they. Even that family who loves you sees that it's easy to lose someone because of what you guys are."
"I think that us talking with each other has been more therapeutic than I have ever experienced- especially when sitting out here for hours staring at the waters," she chuckled.
I cracked a smile and nodded my own head, "yea, I think I can agree with you there."
"Alright," Sasha sighed, getting up from the edge. "Time to deal with our problems."
"Mine's already here," I sighed, looking over to the growling animal.
"Oh," she said backing up.
"Its okay," I said getting up.
"Sam, meet Sasha. Sasha, my big brother Sam."
Sam let out another vicious growl, coming closer to her.
"You really don't want to even think about hurting her," I threatened to him. He gave me a look and I narrowed my eyes at him. Backing down with a huff, he stared at her the whole time.
"Thanks Bella," she said giving me a smile.
"Go fix things with Edward? The Cullens too," I added.
"Will do," she said hugging me. Not expecting it, Sam immediately perked up, growling again, while I cracked another smile and hugged her back.
"See you around Bella," Sasha smiled walking off, avoiding Sam as much as she could.
"Bye," I waved and then turned my attention back to the black wolf.
"So," I sighed as he stared at me. "You were here because…"
His big wolf face stared at me and I rolled my eyes. "As much as I love to talk with myself," I said sarcastically, "will you phase back?"
His eyes stared at me a while longer before retreating to the trees. Taking that time to gather some air in my lungs, I sat back down at the edge of the cliff and stared out into the water. Sasha was definitely right. No matter how long I would stare out at these waters, her and I talking was a lot more therapeutic.
"What are you doing following me out here?" I asked when he sat down next to me. It was my turn to cut to the chase and skip all the 'I love you's and I'm sorry'.
"You're my sister," he said nonchalantly.
"When did family ties start mattering?" I asked with a scoff.
"When haven't they?" he questioned to me. I sighed again. Okay, so he had a point there.
"What do you want then?" I asked.
"I'm not expecting anything," he said still watching me, "I just had to make sure you were okay."
"I'm far from it," I muttered.
"I know," he spoke. "And I'm sorry."
"Wow, no lecture on the vampire talking with me?" I asked with a snap of sarcasm.
"Thought I'd lay off on that one," he sighed, "I'd like to keep movement of my limbs."
I gave a short chuckle and stopped myself quickly. I was supposed to be mad or unhappy with Sam. He wasn't supposed to make me laugh. The both of us went silent again and I wasn't sure how to continue. I thought back to what Sasha said and wanted to forgive him, but I didn't know if my heart could really mean it.
Laying my head on his shoulder, I exhaled a large breath and watched as the waters sparkles. A small smile spread across my face whether I liked it or not when Sam's warm arm wrapped around me. As much as I wanted to hate him and think I didn't need him in my life, I really did miss him. And I missed being his little sister.
"I wish things were different," I spoke breaking the silence.
"Me too," he said hugging me closer.
"Sam," I sighed leaning forward to gather more comfort from him. "I'm really scared."
He took in a breath and looked down to me. "We'll be okay."
"Will we?" I asked more to myself than others. "Between you and I, there's just something…I-… never mind," I said pulling away.
"Hey, no. What?" he asked reeling me back in. "what were you going to say?" he asked holding me against my will.
"Sam," I said trying to shift away from his arms.
"Bella, come on, tell me," he commanded lightly. Giving him a hard stare, I found he wasn't going to be backing own. His own reply was just pure curiosity, worry and love for me. Letting out a groan, I gave up fighting and mellowed against him again.
"There's just this bad feeling I have."
"Bad as in…"
"I'm not sure," I spoke sadly, "I can't tell if its really me feeling whatever I feel or its some evil thing inside me taking over. I feel darkness and that's all I know."
He swallowed with difficulty and then kissed the top of my head.
"We'll get through it Bella. We can do this."
"I don't want to lose anybody because of what we are," I said, my walls now cracking. With a tear rolling down my cheek I had some difficulty letting out my feelings, "I can't even think about the possibility of losing you."
"You won't," he said kissing my head again. "I promise you, you wont," he murmured.
Taking in a shaky breath, I closed my eyes and wished life was easier. If I was to ever lose Sam, I think that would be the last straw for me. And Sasha was right about that. He was my family- my big brother. Even though there were a lot of bad memories, those being the easiest to remember, we had a lot of good ones. He was my idol when I was little and we had some really good times.
"I love you," I confessed, looking out to the sky, "and I forgive you."
He gave me a small squeeze. "I love you too and…thank you," he said. I could feel his jaw tighten and I knew he was holding back the overwhelming emotional tears of his own.
A/N: How's the return from a long hiatus chapter so far? Worth the long wait? (haha, probs not but I'd love to hear from you anyways!)