Author's Note: Two things to say really; one, I hope my friend gets around to drawing this and many other ideas he and I have come up with soon, and two, because no one else has thought to do this yet, and that's just terrible. This'll be updated infrequently; mainly whenever the mood takes me. I think I'll go with mild hentai physics for the love scenes, although I typically prefer not to since so much of it so unreasonable.

Ragna's Apartment: Day 1

Ragna coughed and tasted blood in his mouth. His stomach was on fire and the strength was fading from his limbs. Tightly wrapped around his midsection were the arms of Nu, a look of pure delight on her face. "Now we can be together forever Ragna," she said joyously. She looked up at him and pressed her mouth against his.

Ragna broke free of her kiss and screamed, "Shit! Shit! SHIT!" He twisted his head around and saw the fires of the Cauldron growing ever closer. Instinctively he closed his eyes; he felt Nu's head nuzzle against his chest and let out a contented sigh. "God damn it!"

With a jolt he sat, bolt upright, in his bed, panting heavily. He looked around the room; clutter and clothing littered the room. Next to this bed rested his sword, leaning against the nightstand. He clutched at his chest, still breathing heavily. "That fucking dream again," he breathed, "Each time it gets more vivid. I don't like what that might imply." He slumped back onto his pillow and rubbed the heel of his hands into his eyes. "Ugh. I better go back to bed," he muttered. He looked blearily at the clock next to his bed. It was nine forty-two. "Ugh. Maybe not," he said angrily, "Can't believe it's already morning." He rolled over and defiantly closed his eyes. Then, he tore them open so quickly he felt his eyes might pop out of his head. Asleep, next to him, looking peaceful and content, was Nu. Ragna screamed in a way a man probably shouldn't. Nu slowly opened her eyes and looked, unfocused at Ragna. She sat up and rubbed her eye sleepily.

With a content smile, she flopped over onto Ragna and gave him a hug. "Morning Ragna," she said cheerily.

"N-Nu! What the hell are you doing here?" he asked, confusion and fright battling for dominance in his mind.

Nu sat up again and looked at Ragna, a look of slight confusion on her face. "I live here," she said simply, "I moved in yesterday. Remember?" She pointed to a smaller pile of clothing sitting next to Ragna's, to her Nox Nyctores, leaning idly against the wall, visible cracks forming around the point where it leaned before holding up a small plushie of Ragna.

Ragna fell out of bed. He stood up and stared wildly at Nu, "You're fucking kidding me. Why in the name of all that is fucked up and wrong would I let you do that!"

Nu frowned a bit. "But, you let Nu move in Ragna," she said, her cheeriness evaporating slowly.

Ragna gulped. 'Please don't try to kill me. Please don't try to kill me. Please don't try to kill me,' he thought rapidly. Instead Nu looked down at the plushie she held sadly.

"Nu's been really lonely Ragna," she said sadly. Ragna felt a bizarre mix of pity and paralyzing fear. Nu clutched the plushie close to her chest.

Ragna sighed; the fear was leaving him now, replaced by the feeling he would imagine someone who pushes an old woman down a flight of stairs on accident would feel. "Alright, alright," he said, giving in, "You can stay. I must be crazy, and I have no idea what I was on last night to let you live here, but you can stay. Just don't…try to kill me or stab me or something like that okay?" Nu smiled at Ragna and nodded. He sat tentatively down on the edge of the bed again and asked, "Why are you living here anyway?"

Nu blinked. "Nu was lonely," she said simply. Ragna rubbed his face with his hand.

"Thanks, that really…sets things straight," he said awkwardly. Nu smiled. Ragna turned to face his closet and rubbed his eyes again. 'Today,' he thought, 'Is going to be fucking wei- What the hell?"

Nu had crawled over and hugged Ragna from behind. She rubbed her cheek against him and let out a contented sigh. "Can Ragna and Nu finish today?" she asked.

Ragna had no idea what she was talking about. "Nu," he asked still staring at his closet, "What are you talking about?" He paused. "Uh…we weren't fighting yesterday were we?"

Nu laughed. "Don't be silly Ragna," she said happily. Ragna felt another wave of relief wash over him.

"That's good because I thought…" he began, but was interrupted by being pulled back down onto the bed. Nu pressed her lips hungrily against his and slid her tongue into his mouth. Ragna felt his eyes go wide. He broke away and scrambled to feet. He wheeled around and stared, eyes full of confusion at Nu. "Wh-what the hell were we doing last night?" Nu smiled at Ragna; it was the kind of smile that made shivers run down his spine. "O-oh God," he stuttered, "N-no way."

Nu got up off the bed. She was wearing one of Ragna's shirts; it was overlarge and fit her much in the same way Noel's outfit fit her. She pulled off the shirt, confirming to Ragna, that she was indeed totally naked underneath. Her pale body shone somewhat in the relative darkness of Ragna's room.

Ragna stared at Nu, his mouth agape, making noises he imagined a fish out of water would make. There was a short, awkward silence, and then, in an instant, Nu was upon him. He felt himself crash onto the floor. He tried to push Nu off of him; that failed. He tried again; he failed again. At last, he contented himself with just flailing his arms in the air. Nu seemed to neither notice nor care. Eventually, Ragna just let his arms fall uselessly next to him, splayed out across the floor. Nu's hair had twisted and fanned itself out across the two of them, and he was becoming increasingly aware of her breasts pressing against his chest. Suddenly, Nu broke away from his lips for a moment and whispered, "What's wrong Ragna? You were much more interested in this last night."

Ragna stared at Nu. "I can't even remember last night," he said quietly.

Nu's eye went wide. "You don't?" she gasped, "Nu will make you remember." She slid down and tugged off Ragna's boxers.

"WHOA, WHOA!" yelled Ragna, grabbing Nu's head. She looked innocently up at him. "What the hell are you doing?" he asked.

Nu continued to stare innocently at Ragna. "Ragna isn't ready yet," she said softly, "Nu will help." She looked down again and gently licked Ragna's flaccid member. Ragna felt another shiver run down his spine. He stared, feeling quite helpless at Nu as she continued to lick and suck him to full height. Nothing in his body seemed to want to work. Slowly, he felt himself becoming bizarrely aroused by what was happening, a feeling that only grew as Nu stopped licking the tip of his member and her dropped mouth down around it. She bobbed her head up and down with increasing speed. She paused for a moment, running her tongue around the head before resuming. With her left hand, she grabbed his shaft and moved it in rhythm with her mouth; using her right hand, she slid a finger into her own moist womanhood and slid it in and out. Ragna felt himself compelled to reach out, and so he did, placing his hand on the back of Nu's head and moving it up and down in time to her sucking. She came to a stop after a few minutes and sat up on her knees. She idly contemplated her fingers before sucking on them softly. Ragna felt his feeling of arousal deepen and strengthen. "Ragna is ready now," said Nu, her voice almost inaudible. She gave a small sigh of contentment and perched herself atop him before sliding her opening down over him, enveloping him on every side. She let out a long moan of pleasure and began to slide up and down on him.

Ragna looked up at the ceiling and closed his eyes. His arms seemed to work again and they chose to raise themselves to his hands could clamp to Nu's hips. Every time Nu slid down, he gave a small grunt. Slowly, her bouncing increased in frequency, and soon, the two were going full pelt. Nu's moans continued to punctuate the air, and she soon bent over Ragna, her arms on his shoulders, moaning softly into his ear. Ragna placed a hand above her tailbone and began pushing down with increasing force; in his ears, Nu's moans began to rise in pitch and frequency. He felt something welling in his groin and with his free hand instinctively pressed Nu's head to his neck; she took this opportunity to gently suck on his neck, her moans now muffled. "Nu," he panted, "Nu, I'm gonna…" He felt himself climax inside her, his hand pressing her abdomen hard down upon him; all around his member, he felt her walls tightening and tugging upward slightly. He groaned loudly; in his ear Nu gave a loud, lustful moan. She collapsed, her light frame lying limp on Ragna's body, her breathing fast, soft panting tickling his ear.

Nu moved her head from Ragna's neck, a bright ring now visible on his neck and pressed her lips against him. Ragna did not struggle this time. The pair kissed passionately for a while before Nu slowly slid herself off of Ragna's now limp member; a mixture of semen and fluid dripped out slowly. Perhaps it was the sex high, but Ragna didn't mind quite as much as he would have had his mind been more clear. He got to his feet with Nu and scratched the back of his head. "So that's what happened last night," he said sheepishly.

Nu shook her head. "No Ragna," she said, her eyes widening innocently, "Nu wanted Ragna to do that, but you fell asleep." She hugged him with a squeal of happiness. "Nu and Ragna became one this time though," she said blissfully. Ragna felt somewhat embarrassed. Privately, he preferred this method of 'merging' much more to be impaled and dropped into the fires of hell, though he felt that expressing this would lead to rather…tiring consequences.

"If you don't mind, I'm going to go shower Nu," said Ragna, his head clearing and becoming increasingly bothered by the general mess his groin was in. Nu jumped on his back and crossed her legs around his midsection.

"Nu will join you then," she said happily.

Ragna sighed. "Fine," he said, opening the door to his room. He walked out into the living room and made straight for the door to the bathroom when an emotionless voice drifted from the couch in front of the television.

"Analyzing…Good morning Ragna. Good morning Nu," said the voice. Ragna almost tripped. He stared at the couch, and soon the head and shoulders of Lambda rose up; apart from having no eyepatch and different skin tone and hair color, she looked identical to Nu. Ragna twisted his head to look at Nu who still had a cheery expression on her face.

"Why exactly did we stop last night Nu?" he asked, almost scared to know the answer.

"Well, Lambda said that Ragna should rest. Nu didn't agree," she said matter-of-factly, "Ragna has much more energy than anyone else does."

Ragna stared over at Lambda. "But…you're…different…you're…" he spluttered. He clutched the sides of his head. "NOTHING MAKES SENSE ANYMORE!" A knock came from the front door.

"You should get that Ragna," said Lambda, her voice the same monotone, "And you owe me; I heard you and Nu quite clearly." Ragna almost tripped as he made for the door.

He swung the door open and shouted, "What! What do you want? I'm in the middle of the weirdest fucking dilemma eve…" He stopped midsentence. It was Noel, holding a few bags of what appeared to be groceries.

"Uh, sorry Ragna," she said timidly, "I didn't know you were having a bad morning."

Ragna stared at Noel; he felt his knees might give. "You live here too don't you?" he said morosely.

Noel blushed. "Um, yes, I do. I moved in with Nu and Lambda yesterday."

"WHYYYYYYYYYY?" shouted Ragna, throwing his arms into the air.

It was going to be a long, long day.