It's Star Wars goodness on a Saturday afternoon on ITV, and this emerged =D

"If we were in Star Wars, who would we be?"

"Well, I'd be Han, obviously," James said obnoxiously. "Harrison Ford and I are both incredibly good looking. Tell them, Pad."

It was a dull day outside, and the Marauders, all aged between nineteen and twenty, were sat in James's cushy living room watching the flickering Muggle cassette Lily had insisted on buying for their house ("It'll be good for the baby to have a bit of Muggle culture."), watching Harrison Ford, Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher prance around the set to Empire Strikes Back. They had watched it umpteen times or more, but the boys still insisted it was the best piece of Muggle film they had seen in the past year, thus buying the video tape.

"Harrison Ford is indeed incredibly good looking," agreed Sirius in answer to his friend's question, causing James to nod, satisfied. "However, Prongs," Sirius continued with a smile, "Unlike Harrison Ford, unfortunately you do not make me question my sexuality."

"But Sirius is most definitely Leia," Remus said with a smirk.

Sirius glared at him.

"What?" Remus said innocently. "You have the most hair."

"Well if we're going on that, then you can be Chewie," Sirius said with a malevolent smile.

"How am I Chewie?" Remus spluttered incredulously.

"He has a point, actually, Moony," James grinned. "You look pretty similar at full moon."

"And the rest of the time?" snapped Remus. "I don't look like him all month long."

"The rest of the time you look old," commented Sirius. "You can be Obi Wan."

Peter and James chuckled as Remus hit Sirius with a pillow.

"And who am I?" asked Peter, as Sirius began to fix his hair again.

"Is Jabba the Hutt blond?" Sirius asked openly. Peter squealed in offence as James roared with laughter. Remus rolled his eyes.

"You could be that teddy bear thing," James said cheerfully. "Ewoks or whatever."

"He's not cute enough," shrugged Sirius, who was currently twirling his hair into loops on his ears. "What do you think, honey-pie?" he asked James, who snorted.

"Go back to the rejected punk look," he grinned, pulling on one of the buns to return it to its original looseness.

"I am not a punk," snapped Sirius, standing up to check himself over in the mirror. "Anyway. I'm misunderstood. I'm more like Luke than Leia." He mimed holding a Light Saber.

"Bah, you're not handsome enough, Padfoot."

"Mark Hamill isn't handsome!" protested Sirius. "And me, I'm bloody gorgeous."

"And ever so modest," said Remus, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"You're just pissed off you didn't get to be Luke or Han," Sirius sneered. "I think we should change Remus."

"To who?"


"No way!" Remus growled as Sirius laughed at his expression. "I am nothing like 3PO."

"Dumbledore would be Yoda," grinned James, causing Sirius to snort.

"Who is Lily then?" asked Peter having recovered from his spluttering after being reassured that he didn't look like Jabba the Hutt.

"The Ewok chief," James said dotingly. "She's cute but she's feisty. And she's my little teddy bear, but I could never call her that."

"I'm going to throw up."

"I think I just did a little."

"I thought I was an Ewok!"

"Well, who's fat in Star Wars other than Jabba?" Sirius asked thoughtfully, still examining his black hair closely. "Lils can be them..." He trailed off when he caught the reflection of Lily, great with child, glowering at him in the reflection of the mirror. "Oh, err, hey, Lils. How's the pregnancy going?"

Lily smiled sweetly back at him. "Would you miss your balls if I castrated you?" she asked him jovially. His face was a picture, and Remus snorted at him.

"There's spaghetti in the fridge," she said in a motherly fashion to James. "It's frozen, so you'll have to cook it." She looked up and her eyes flickered over Sirius with doubt. "On second thought, I'd rather have a functioning oven when I return. Maybe you should get take-out."

"Okay, babe," James replied with no indication that anything she had just said had sunk in. "See, I am so like Harrison Ford. He flicks his hair like me."

"Aw, if Leia and he had babies," Sirius said wistfully. Then he seemed to have an idea. "Ha, you should call the baby Harrison! Harrison Potter!"

"And if it's a girl?"

"...Leia Potter? After me?" Sirius suggested hopefully.

"Hell no," James said. "Sirius is a girly-enough name. I'll call her Sirius."

"That's child abuse," Remus supplied from the floor.

"He lived with it," shrugged James, indicating his best friend.

Sirius glared. "You wait, James. Harrison Sirius Potter will be born one day, and then you'll be sorry."

Well, Harry Potter was born at least.