Author's Note: An overview of a relationship between Michael and an [OC] club kid, a young girl who comes into the club scene never having done drugs or anything particularly wild before. It switches from first person (James) to third person. I can't say whether it follows the book or the movie more, but James's point of view is written his writing style, as well as I could copy it. Even though I can see this isn't a very active category, feedback is very much appreciated :)
Diclaimer: I don't own Party Monster, Disco Bloodfeast, the Club Kids, James, Michael, blah blah blah... I do however own Tinka, since I made her up.
No amount of drugs could ever make me forget the day she had first walked into Limelight, her glittery eyes wide and full of mingled curiosity and fear. I had watched her make her way through the club, and I immediately knew two things: that I had never seen her before, and that she most definitely did not belong in there. At least, I didn't think I had ever seen her before - the K always made everyone look the same. Although I could pretty much assume I had never seen her before. Her dumbfounded and completely lost demeanor told me that much. She looked just like a little blonde Dorothy: "I don't think I'm in Kansas anymore!"
And she most certainly was not!
But who was I to be the Wicked Witch of the West when she bounded up right to me, her green eyes practically popping out of her head when she realized exactly who she was looking at. After all, I had not had my face painted green that night. Instead I wore - oh, what was I wearing? I don't remember exactly what it was, but of course it was something fabulous. My perfectly styled wig had stayed safe from Angel's obnoxious wings that night, I clearly remember that. But anyway, she practically skipped her way through the club, her blonde curls bouncing along behind her.
"You're James St. James!" she said loudly, stopping dead in her tracks right beside me.
"Well I'm glad to see your vision is working perfectly," I said, unable to avoid the sarcasm. Oh but it just absolutely broke my heart to see the crestfallen look on her face after I said it! And it was right then that I knew she was something special. I never felt sorry for anyone! "And what is your name, darling?"
"Is that your real name?" I asked out of pure curiosity. After all, I had definitely never heard that name before - just when I thought I'd heard it all!
Tinka nodded, and I raised an eyebrow. Well, for such a strange name, she was cute - pretty young, from what I could tell. Later I had learned she was just seventeen. So young, so innocent! What on earth was she doing in Limelight? Another thing that made her stick out was the fact that she was completely sober! How weird was THAT? Not a single bump in the poor child's body. Actually, I was pretty sure this girl had never even seen a bump of K or coke in her entire life.
And speaking of a bump, I needed one.
And then, as if magically summoned by the desire of drugs, I was graced by the vision of Angel's annoyingly large, white wings. It was as if God himself was looking after me, making sure I was very well taken care of when it came to my drug needs.
"Angel, darling!" I yelled over the music, making Tinka jump in surprise at my sudden outburst. "I need a quick fix, do you mind?"
Well of course he didn't mind! Practically the entire club already owed him thousands of dollars in drugs. What was one more free bump?
"I can't keep giving this out for free," Angel said to my already outstretched hand. "I'm losing money. You already owe me a shitload of money for all the K I give you."
Ugh, I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. Here he went again with this silly little money thing. See, this is why I absolutely could not stand Angel. He was the absolute worst kind of drug dealer, always actually asking - no, demanding! - for the money everyone owed him, as if he actually expected us to PAY for his drugs!
"Well, what about for our newest member?" I demanded, stomping my platform heel on the floor and looking down at Tinka, who looked utterly lost once again. "She hasn't had anything all night! Won't you be a doll and help her out? She hasn't ever tried your drugs."
With a roll of his eyes, Angel withdrew a small bag of perfectly white powder from his pocket and practically threw it at me! How rude. And then as if to make everything even more awkward and rude, he turned on his heel, causing me to quickly dive downward and avoid his stupid wings from destroying my beautiful wig!
Tinka, however, was not so fortunate. Although she backed away as soon as she saw it coming, his wing still smacked her right across the face.
"Don't mind him," I said to her, rising back up from my low crouch, rather proud of myself for avoiding the usual fate of my wig being ruined by Angel's wings. "He's just such a terrible drug dealer. I keep trying to tell Michael to get rid of him! Oh but of course he won't listen to silly old me! Care for a bump?"
"Oh, uhm... I don't do drugs," Tinka said immediately but hesitantly.
Ha! If only I had a bump of K for every time I'd heard that load of shit.
I smiled tightly and winked at her. "Of course you don't, darling," I said. "Neither do I!"
Quickly, I fixed myself a nicely-sized bump on the corner of my fisted hand and sniffed it up. That would even the K feeling enough for a while. As I put the tiny bag into my prized lunch box, I noticed Tinka's eyes had been widened back into shock. Oh, dear, perhaps I had been right to say this girl had literally never seen a single scrap of drugs in her life.
The poor child!
"Well I didn't mean to shock you," I said, slightly apologetic, "but darling you're going to have to get used to these sort of things if you want to get into this scene."
What I know now and didn't know then was that this young girl had sealed her fate the moment she'd stepped into Limelight. Sure, she was just another wannabe Club Kid who had absolutely no idea what she was getting herself into. However, soon, it was all going change for her in just a matter of seconds. And of course, just like the occasional lucky chosen ones, Michael Alig was the one to thank for this girl's future destruction. If only I had known back then, maybe I could have saved her; perhaps at least made it easier for her. But then again, had I known most of what I know now, hundreds of people could have been saved!
And it was then that Michael Alig's skinny little heroin-addicted ass jumped right between me and Tinka.
"Don't think I didn't see you take that bump, Skrod-la-da!" he said, swiping at me with his bony hand. "You jerk, always taking Angel's supplies and then absolutely refusing to share with me. He's my drug dealer, after all."
"Well you certainly don't have a very good drug dealer, Michael," I snapped back. "He actually had the nerve to bring up the money I owed him! And he actually said he couldn't keep giving drugs out for free!"
"Oh, James, you know to just ignore him," Michael said, rolling his eyes and batting his lashes. And then his eyes fell on Tinka, who was once again at a complete loss of words, but instead now she was looking up at Michael as if he were God himself.
Here we go, that was how they ALL looked up to him - at least, in the beginning, until they realized how absolutely horrible he was. But by then it was always too late for them.
"What's your name?" Michael asked her, looking her up and down - sizing her up, I knew very well.
"Tinka," she squeaked, biting her red-stained lips.
"Tinka..." Michael mimicked, his thin lips curving into a smirk. "I like that a lot. James, why do you always try to keep the good ones away from me?"
"I only just met her!" I huffed. "My God, Michael, she just walked into the club twenty minutes ago - can't you control yourself?"
"Hardly," he said, finally tearing his eyes away from Tinka for a split second to give me a knowing look. "Don't be jealous, James, just because everyone likes me more than you."
"Oh, please, nobody would like you if it wasn't for me!"
"Tinka," Michael said, ignoring me, as usual, "would you like to come with me and meet some people?"
I don't even have to tell you her answer, do I? She practically peed in her pink tights! And of course she didn't notice the sly wink Michael gave me before leading her off into the crowd. It was then I kissed poor little Tinka goodbye, although I had some high hopes for her. It wasn't very often anyone declined drugs shoved right in front of their faces, but she had done it. So maybe - JUST maybe - she could be saved from Michael's terrible web of drug-ridden, awful lies.
Doubted it, though.
The next time I saw Tinka after that night was at Michael's apartment only just a few weeks later, where everyone had migrated soon after leaving Limelight. I hadn't seen her there, but I definitely saw her sitting on Michael's lap doing cocaine off his hand! She was like a fabulous lap dog, her hair curled into perfection and her eyes glittering in the dim light. She was wearing a tie and pearls around her neck, and her slightly skinnier legs were covered in florescent pink thigh-highs, leaving just enough room for the imagination when her legs disappeared into her little plaid skirt.
I couldn't help it. I was impressed. Just a few days ago (or was it weeks?) she was a shell-shocked Bambi. Now she was sitting on the King of the Club Kids' lap as if she were queen, snorting cocaine and actually making purple glitter eyeliner look good!
"James!" Michael said, spotting me in the small crowd gathering in his living room - which was way too small for any type of gathering, might I point out. He slid Tinka off his lap and jumped off the couch to hug me.
"Michael," I said politely, patting his back and giving him a tight smile, "you look lovely, darling, as does your new little pet."
"Oh, Skrink." Michael laughed. "Isn't she wonderful? I absolutely love her to death! To hell with Keoki."
So that's what this was about? Keoki had finally kicked Michael to the curb. Well that certainly explained a lot for me! It also made me feel even more sorry for this poor new girl. Michael was only just using her - of course, just like he used everyone else around him.
I really didn't like this whole concept of a conscious that I had. Feeling sorry for people was such a bore. And it made it practically impossible to enjoy my K!
"She is just so innocent," Michael went on, leading me into the kitchen and peeking into the oven, where no doubt he was preparing some more K. "Can you believe she'd never done cocaine before? Or K, or heroin - or anything, really!"
"Michael, that's how you were," I pointed out.
"Oh yes," Michael observed, his eyebrows furrowing as if he was remembering a simpler time. "Well, I quickly fixed that for her. Now she knows how to have fun!"
"Well that's lovely, darling," I said absent-mindedly, my his rambling beginning to become boring, as they always did. My attention was drawn more to the wonderful treat cooking inside the oven, and I instinctively reached out to check it myself.
Michael slapped my hand away.
"No dipping into the cooking sherry, Skrod-la-doo!" he sang, laughing. "Oh, James, you're such a drug addict!"
"Not as much as you, Skrinkle."
We both turned at the sound of Tinka's wail as she stomped into the kitchen, nothing on her feet but those sheer thigh-highs. Her eyes were so red that you could see it even through all that purple eyeliner!
"Yes, darling?" Michael answered immediately, and I almost gagged.
"Freeze was making fun of me because I've never done ecstasy before," she complained, sticking out her glossy bottom lip.
"Oh, for God's sake," I started, rolling my eyes dramatically. "Freeze probably won't even remember a word he said by tomorrow morning! Don't pay him any attention, darling, he's a hat-maker!"
She giggled, and I smiled proudly. There. I had done my good deed for the day. Now maybe I wouldn't feel so sorry for her anymore!
"I'll take care of it," Michael said suddenly, grabbing a bottle of Coke from the refrigerator and popping it open before setting it down on the counter.
I watched in absolute horror as he poured some of the Coke into the sink, and of course I already knew what he was planning on doing. Michael's horrid obsession with this sort of revenge was probably one of his worst. And it made me learn to never take a drink from him ever again in my entire life!
"Oh, Michael, I hardly - oh Michael!" I said huffily, exasperated, as he peeked into the living room before unzipping his shorts and pulling out his penis.
Tinka let out a tiny squeak and quickly looked away, covering her mouth in shock as Michael promptly peed into the Coke, filling it back up to the top as it had been before. I could only roll my eyes once more, knowing there was absolutely nothing I could do at this point. Leave it to Michael to top my one good deed! Although I wad glad for one thing: I did not feel sorry for what was about to happen to Freeze. I didn't approve of him either, though he did carry good heroin.
Michael screwed the top back on the Coke, smiling all the while, and stepped back outside the kitchen, right towards Freeze. Tinka and I quickly hid behind the wall that separated the kitchen from the living room, trying to peek in through the crowd and find Freeze.
And there he was! Perched on top of one of Michael's barstools he'd stolen from Area after it lost its glamour. And Michael bounded up to him, Coke bottle in hand, friendly as ever. Of course Freeze was too fucked up to even think of what he could possibly be doing, and so (their words lost to our ears) within seconds, Freeze had the bottle in his hand and was taking a giant swig.
Then he started coughing, spitting it all back out. Tinka burst into giggles, and, I have to admit, so did I. It was just so funny! More so to Tinka, since she'd never seen this before. But I indeed had seen this many times. Michael often turned to pee to solve his issues. I once had been one of his victims - hence why I never take a drink from him anymore. I had also seen plenty of people fall prey to this horrible revenge act of his - and it wasn't just for revenge. It was his idea of fun, putting stuff in people's drink and laughing, clapping as he watched their expressions of horror.
Oh, Michael, he was just such charming that nobody ever really got angry!
After that night, Michael and Tinka became practically inseparable. It was absolutely sickening - they were like the Terror Twins! Everywhere you saw Michael, Tinka was right at his heels, her cute little curls bouncing around her in perfect tune with her perky little boobs! I wanted to choke on my drink every time I saw them walk into the club, hand-in-hand, sharing their little bags of coke, K, and heroin.
And if anyone dared to mess with Tinka, they would get a mouthful of Michael's pee or some baking soda in their cocaine. I couldn't even tell you how many times I'd seen Freeze or Mavis go into a fit of rage because of Michael's stupid payback. One time, he switched someone's coke with K, and then sat back and laughed uncontrollably when they began to freak out, never having done K before.
It was sweet - in a disgustingly disturbing way. He looked out for her, and in return she gave him what he craved the most and just could never get enough of: attention. Tinka adored Michael - absolutely adored him! He was her Gregory Peck, and she was his Audrey Hepburn; throw a little drugs in and you had yourself a club scene version of Roman Holiday!
She even went along with his stupid polka-dot fashion idea one night during one of Michael's subway parties. They were both head-to-toe in polka-dots, his purple and hers pink. Her frilly little dress matching ever so perfectly (how I hated it!) with his tutu. I always told Michael it was a stupid fashion statement, and that nobody would ever pick it up - but to this very day, I'm sure, he still believes someone catch on to it!
I soon began to pick up and learn things about Tinka the more she became a part of our little clique. Things I did not particularly care about nor need to know, although quite interesting at times. I heard that she was a runaway, meant to be packed away at a tight-knit boarding school somewhere in the Upper East Side of New York. Her parents were extremely strict - and rich, of course - and apparently they had caught her smoking cigarettes and watching our special on television. They had feared she was doing drugs and all sort of illegal things and immediately took action!
No little spoiled daughter of theirs was going to be smoking cigarettes and taking ecstasy! No siree!
But when they presented her with the notion of boarding school, Tinka had snapped, absolutely refusing to go. Personally, I didn't see the big deal at all. Rich boarding school kids were always the best clubbers, and they could afford the very best drugs! Why, she probably would've been better off. God knows it would've done her good to never have met Michael - or any of us, for that matter. Nevertheless, she had packed up her things just a week before she was due to start at her new school and disappeared in the middle of the night. She hadn't talked to her parents ever since.
Gone were the days of fresh cavier, the very best couture clothes, Chanel makeup, and a secure trust fund!
Of course, none of it ever came straight from Tinka's mouth to my ears. They were all mixed stories from Freeze, Angel, Jennytalia, and sometimes Michael who threw in a few random facts. Freeze had sworn her parents had caught her with acid, not cigarettes. But I knew very well that couldn't have been true. A cigarette was probably the worst she had ever seen in real life until coming into our world. We had all but ruined her. And still, there was more ruining to be done!
It was after one of Michael's Bloodfeast parties that he'd taken her virginity.
Oh, did I not mention that? Yes, it's true, our dear Tinka really and truly was that innocent - let me make an emphasis on that past tense: was. I was absolutely appalled when I heard it. I hated Michael for it - now I had to feel even worse for her! After all, losing it to Michael? What a tragedy! I had made sure to send her a big box of chocolate after I found out. Goodness knows the poor kid needed it more than ever!
It was just a normal Bloodfeast party: fake blood everywhere, people closed up in transparent coffins and boxes looking as gruesome as ever, severed legs, arms, and penises hanging up in every direction, and moi - adorned in the most perfectly executed outfit that was sure to land in Michael Musto's latest writings. At least, it better have been - I worked extremely hard to make the fake brain matter spilling out of my wig look authentic!
Tinka was in a K hole, and even through her glazed expression and the fake bruises and scratches on her face, she still looked gorgeous. At the time, I had been completely clueless as to why she looked so goddamn adorable all the time. But now it's perfectly clear - she had been a virgin! How could I have not noticed that familiar doe-eyed innocence this whole time? How Michael can live with himself is completely unknown to me. Of course, it wasn't the worst he'd done.
As I usually did, I examined her outfit before speaking to her: She wore a a loose-fitted dress torn in all the right places and splattered with blood; she had an unusually large amount of blood-covered cleavage peeking at the top of her dress, and her legs were bare save for some fake blood. Her blonde locks were tied into two pigtails that bounced naturally with her strides.
"James!" she ran up to me, practically falling on top of me as she threw her arms around me.
"Well, hello to you, too," I said, pulling away from her slowly and making sure she hadn't smeared or moved anything important. "Kudos on the outfit, darling. Have anything fun left to share?"
"Michael's giving me a present tonight," she told him as she withdrew a plastic bag from between her cleavage.
I was careful to pick it up with just the very tips of my fingers. "Oh?" I said without interest, pulling the bag open and admiring its contents before taking out a tiny line. "And what's that?"
"An ecstasy pill," Tinka said proudly.
"My God, darling, you still haven't had one after all this time?" I asked after taking my line and wiping off my nose.
Tinka shook her head, biting her lip.
"Well, good luck with that," I said, handing back her now nearly empty bag and preparing to walk away, already bored with the conversation. So it was her first time trying ecstasy. That was the most harmless drug she could do after everything she had done by now. "I'm sure you and Michael will have a wonderful night."
With a wink, I left her with questioning eyes. Poor thing had no idea what was going to happen! Again, if only I had known what I know now...
I didn't find out until much later that night about Tinka's... condition. What with being a virgin and all. But how was I supposed to know? She was seventeen! And who on earth was still a virgin at seventeen? Perhaps if I had known, I would've warned her - damn that guilty conscious again! - but I didn't know. I don't even know if Michael knew. Wait, of course he knew. He was evil enough to actually be excited about such an idea! Robbing a girl of her innocence.
Of course, I always over-think things like this. Such a silly thing like virginity meant nothing. It was her own fault, if anything. She should've taken care of that nasty little problem before coming to New York. Especially when it was so easy to do it!
As a mater of fact, I saw her the very next morning of her deflowering. And how I so desperately wish I hadn't!
I had stayed at Michael's apartment after the party, too fucked up to even remember where I lived. She usually always woke up before anyone else and fixed a pot of coffee along with a bit of coke to remedy our ever-lasting hangovers - she was such a doll. This morning, however, I found her curled at the end of the couch, looking an absolute mess. She was wearing just a flimsy long-sleeved shirt, her pigtails in a complete disarray and her eyeliner smeared around her eyes. She looked exhausted, and I wondered if she'd been up all night. Probably so. Her eyes were as red as her panties! I hadn't even bothered to ask. Instead, I simply got up and skipped right into the kitchen to fix myself a bump of coke to start off the morning.
Don't get me wrong - I felt terrible for her. But I knew what happened without having to ask. After all, I was there - in my own little K Land, but still there.
Tinka took the ecstasy while still at Limelight, but soon after came back to Michael's apartment along with me, Freeze, Angel, and some other tag-along that I couldn't remember very well. At some point during the night (or actually, I should say the early hours of the morning), Michael had led Tinka into his bedroom. Nothing strange to the outside eye. Tinka had been staying with Michael for a good bit of time now. But tonight had been different, and instead of just giggling sleepily and talking of drugged-out nonsense until they both passed out, they had gotten naked and changed everything.
Pop open the bottles of champagne! (no pun intended) Tinka was a woman now!
A few days after, I found myself alone with Michael one morning cooking up a nice portion of K for us to share. Tinka was still asleep - if you thought they were attached at the hip before, their togetherness was absolutely unimaginable now. Except that this time around it was more her who was attached than him, which of course I had only expected to happen. But Michael hadn't even mentioned a single thing about anything! It was rather odd, to be honest. Michael usually gloated about these type of things.
"I've been meaning to ask you something," I said, walking back into the living room carrying the tray of freshly cooked Ketamine.
"What?" Michael asked absent-mindedly, his eyes on the hot tray.
"You had sex with Tinka."
"I thought you were going to ask me something." He looked up at me and chuckled. "If you already know, why would you ask?"
"Well... did you know she was a virgin?" I blurted out, taking the small razor he had ready to break down their drugs.
"Oh? Was she?" he said passively.
I blinked and stopped what I was doing.
"You didn't know?" I demanded. "You had to have known! Angel, Freeze - everyone knew."
He was lying, I could tell. He did not once meet my eyes during this conversation. That was one of the many things Michael couldn't stand about me; I could always tell when he was lying. He did it so often I had simply just gotten used to ignoring it and pretending to believe him. I just didn't understand the point in lying about something so small and unimportant. At least, it was small and unimportant to us. So why did he even bother lying about it? I never found out, nor did I really care. Michael was just Michael, and his strange reasons for everything probably seemed to make sense in his brain. Besides, I really didn't care about the whole thing - I was only curious, just like everyone else.
"I guess I never really thought about it," Michael said finally. "Does it really matter? Oh, I'll do that - you take way too long."
"Well Michael, I knew you had no soul," I said, laughing lightly. "I don't think you've ever ruined anyone as much as you have her."
To that he said absolutely nothing; just shrugged and snorted up his line of K and then passed me the razor. I hadn't expected anything more from him, but once again I had that dreadful guilty feeling in the pit of my stomach. How I HATED that feeling, and it just wouldn't go away!
After those few days, I avoided Tinka like the plague. I just simply could not handle the overwhelming guilt and the sorry feeling I had for her. If only it wasn't so hard to not run into her everywhere I went!
I had been annoyed by how often Tinka and Michael were together before, but now it was just an absolute nuisance. I couldn't even talk to Michael anymore! Every time I tried, there she was at his side, their fingers laced together between them. The first time it had happened was the worst, because I most definitely noticed the absence of that familiar innocence in her eyes I had grown to know. It had been annoying before, but I began to miss it. Instead now her eyes were usually glazed over and red with all of the drugs she had consumed, and they had began to have a tired look around them. She often looked like a child who had just been told Santa Clause was indeed not real. And every time she looked at Michael, it was practically dripping with adoration and admiration. It made me nauseated every time I saw it.
She crawled on top of him and twirled her fingers in his hair. They had just split a line of the little bit of K Michael had talked Angel into giving him, despite the incredible amount of money he already owed him. But Michael didn't care about that. Peter would soon take care of it. And in about ten minutes, he would be in dream land and would certainly not care. His eyes already felt slightly heavy, and he could feel himself slipping into K land already.
And so he only mumbled a "Hmm?" in response to Tinka's big expectant eyes looking down at him from where she sat perched on his stomach.
"Do you love me?" she asked.
Her voice sounded so far away to him. He smiled and nodded slowly, reaching out to tug on one of her curls playfully.
"Of course I do, darling," he said finally.
Her glossy pink lips curved into a small smile, and she slid off of him and fell back into the bed, giggling.
"Well, good," she said, turning onto her side and looking at him sideways, her eyes twinkling in that sense of adoration James could not stand, "because I love you, too."
Michael smiled at her, now almost fully feeling the K overcome his body and taking him into dream land. He put a finger to her nose and winked before jumping up from the bed, stumbling slightly as he got down on the ground. He laughed as he tried to get his balance back and skipped over to the box of records Keoki had left at the apartment. He pulled out the first one he saw and put it on to play, then opened up his makeup box as an old 50's song began to play.
"Let me do your makeup?" he asked, looking up at her through his long lashes.
"Why of course." Tinka smiled widely and jumped off the bed.
It was moments like these, whether he was there to witness them or not, that made James feel absolutely sick. Tinka was absolutely enamored, and all Michael wanted was someone who would love him unconditionally - not necessarily for any good reasons either, but simply just because he needed the constant attention to drive his annoying ego. And also because Keoki had left him after becoming a successul DJ - which pissed James off, because if it hadn't been for him, his DJ skills would have stayed as terrible and pointless as ever! Keoki should've given some credit to him, after all, since he was the one who taught him everything.
Just like he had taught Michael everything.
Tinka and Michael's little fling lasted quite a long while, to James's and everyone else's surprise. It usually wasn't very long until Michael found someone else to worship his every step. And perhaps James was indeed right in thinking that Tinka was something special. However, not special enough to keep a hold onto Michael for that long.
It was whenever Keoki had finally shown his face again that Michael's attachment to Tinka began to loosen, just as I had expected the second I noticed the cute Latin It Boy walk into Limelight. And well of course Tinka noticed. Whether it was the fact that Michael's hand let go of hers as soon as Keoki had passed him; or that he had not shared his bumps of K or cocaine with her; or not bringing her down onto his lap when we all returned to his apartment; or more likely, all of the above - she had noticed alright. As did I.
Of course, I always knew these things.
I had even made a small bet between Freeze and Angel on how long it took for Tinka to leave in a fit of tears. The bet? Ten bags of heroin. Which of course I won, since I had already seen all of this coming way before anyone had even thought of it. I had even joked about it with Michael Musto ahead of time, knowing the whole ordeal would most likely be printed in Village Voice sooner or later after it happened. After all, everyone loved a good bit of drama, no matter how small it was in Club Land.
Why I could just see it now: Cute Little Upper East Side Rich Princess Gets Dumped for The It Boy! Or Superstar DJ Keoki. Of course, Tinka had never really been one of Michael's "superstars." She had just simply been... a thing. One of his little toys he got to play with when he was bored, soon to be tossed away into the recycle been and sent to the orphans, ragged and torn from all of the use it had been through.
But I still felt sorry for her!
Especially when I had the misfortune of being there when she had packed all of her things - her frilly little dresses I had adored, her endless supply of tights, leggings, thigh-highs, so on and so forth. I still have no idea how she managed to pack it all. The platforms, the makeup, the jewelry. I had noticed a tiny tear slide down her cheek as she folded up the ripped up, still bloodied up dress she'd worn the night of the Bloodfeast party - the poor dear!
Michael had not come home in time to see her leave. It was just Freeze, Angel, and I - but of course I had been the only one to notice: Freeze had been passed out on top of the coffee table, and I had taken the liberty of using his ass to set my tray of just-cooked K on. He had absolutely no right to take up the coffee table! He knew damn well that we needed it. As for Angel - well, actually, I had no idea where he was, but I knew he had to be somewhere. I hadn't seen him leave.
I heard her tiny sniffles coming from Michael's bedroom and felt that goddamn sickening feeling of guilt and sympathy - oh what a disgusting feeling! Regretfully, I turned around and saw her lugging her stuff. I thought of asking where on earth she planned on going and how, but I figured I did not want to know.
"You poor darling," I had said gently.
"I'm fine," she said, wiping at her eyes.
I looked at her skeptically, then looked down at my K and smiled.
"I know just what will cheer you up," I said, glancing up and her and then back at the tray on Freeze's ass. "Won't you do just one last bit of K with me before you go? It'll make it so much easier for you, I promise."
At first she looked doubtful, but eventually she sighed and gave in, putting down her bags and sitting next to me defeatedly. However I noticed she giggled slightly as soon as she realized where I had placed my tray. She patiently waited as I scraped up her bit of K.
I never saw Tinka again after that day - or heard of her, except a small piece in Musto's writings mentioning her disappearance. Perhaps she had gone back to her rich parents' house and worked it out, gone to boarding school and gotten sober. How I hoped for it. But then again, she might have ended up on the street begging for bumps of coke or K. Who knows? Some of them turned out alright, others did not. But for her sake, I very much hoped for the first idea of what could have happened. I liked her, strangely enough - and I never liked any of Michael's little flings. I still hope to hear from or about her one day, just to know what happened.
And that damned sympathetic feeling just never went away!
Author's Note: Do I need to say it? Feedback, please!