Title: One Hundred
Author: Sapphire Smoke
Beta: tamswitter on LJ & Frass on BnF
Fandom: Buffy The Vampire Slayer
For: Lover100 on LJ
A/N: Yeah, I'm totally original with my titles, can't you tell? xDD I've always wanted to do one of these fic challenges. Dunno if I'll ever get around to finishing it, but since they're all going to be one shots it won't really matter either way. These aren't sequential in any way; they're meant to be read as separate stories :) I put M to be on the safe side, since I'm sure I'll include some sexytimez at some point, haha. I always seem to. The titles are the prompts, because I'm a lazy ass and feel no need to make up separate titles lol
Was it too much to ask for a little romance?
Buffy understood that Faith had an "image" to protect; the leather-wearing, boot-clad, "I-don't-give-a-crap-about-anything" girl didn't want to seem like she'd gone all mushy. But Faith was perfectly able to keep her image in tact while being a good girlfriend, behind the scenes, if she wanted. After all, it wasn't like there were people watching them outside the window, secretly being all stalker-like and judging her at Buffy's house.
At least Buffy hoped there wasn't.
Buffy eyes flickered over to the window for a second just to check. She knew she was being paranoid, but in Sunnydale you could never be too sure. After all, there could be a 'make everything the Slayer thinks become true' demon, and then suddenly she'd be stuck with crazy people watching her outside her house and an angry Faith, whose favorite boots would have probably burst into flames by now.
Faith always put them all over her bed, even when Buffy asked her explicitly not to at least ten times. So really, it's not her fault that she wanted to burn them. Isn't one of the basic, human rules "don't put your shoes on your girlfriend's furniture"? Wasn't that like, ingrained into everyone's head as a child? It's just plain rude, not to mention slightly barbaric.
Then again, the way Faith approached slaying, eating, and sex could also easily be filed under the "rude and slightly barbaric" category, so Buffy didn't know why she expected anything different in other areas of her life.
Faith didn't seem to care about being either of those things though as she lay back on Buffy's bed, her dirty shoes getting all over her nice, clean comforter. Again. Buffy's eyes narrowed as she crossed her arms over her chest. Not just because of that – even though that was a fantastic reason – but also because of what Faith said just moments before.
That was probably one of the most insulting things Faith had ever said to her. And trust her when she says there have been a lot.
"So?" Faith asked, looking at her expectantly. She held out her hands like, 'you coming or what?', but Buffy didn't move.
"You want me to have sex with you," Buffy reiterated, looking at her like she must be joking. Because right now, the very concept was laughable.
"Well, yeah, B. Kinda thought that was the whole point of this holiday, y'know?" She smirked, but her joke wasn't well received.
"Faith, it's Valentine's Day!" Buffy exclaimed, exasperated, and maybe a little more than upset. "And you think you can just waltz over to my house, say, 'Drop your pants, B. I'm on a schedule,'" she mocked Faith's earlier words with air quotes, "and actually think you're going to get laid? What; were you dropped on your head as a small child? I'm not your hooker, Faith! In no universe would that line ever get you laid, especially not by your girlfriend on Valentine's Day!"
Faith smirked, amused by her rant. "You done?"
"No!" Buffy exclaimed, on a roll now. "And just for the record, I don't appreciate you putting your dirty, smelly, He-Man boots all over my bed. Maybe you like laying in day old vampire dust and dirt, but I don't!"
Faith continued to smirk at her, but casually kicked her boots off onto the floor. "Happy?" she asked, more amused by this than should be legal. Buffy still failed to see what was so funny about all this.
"No," Buffy replied defiantly. She still wanted candy and flowers, damnit! What's the point of actually having a significant other on Valentine's Day if they don't spoil you?
Then again, she was dating Faith. Maybe expecting to be a spoiled was setting the bar a little too high.
"And why do you keep smirking at me? This isn't funny; you're not getting laid! You're not getting sex tonight, or tomorrow night, or the night after that. Actually you know what? Why don't you just expect to not get touched for a week, because I can't believe that you would actually say something like that to—"
"B!" Faith interrupted, needing to slow down her 'tear Faith a new asshole' train. "I said I was on a schedule cause I was gonna take you out tonight. So can you chill with the screamin' for like, two fuckin' seconds? You're makin' my brain bleed."
"You—" Buffy started, then stopped abruptly as she realized what Faith just said. "Really?" she asked, half in suspicion, half in excitement. Faith had never actually taken her out on a real date before. Then she raised her eyebrow and asked suspiciously, "Where?" Because knowing Faith, she could take her to some kind of biker bar and expect that it fell in the category of 'romantic.'
Faith shrugged, "I dunno, some fuckin' restaurant? The… shit, whatever it's called; Olive Oil or somethin' or other."
"The Olive Garden?" Buffy guessed. She smiled, despite herself.
"Yeah, that. Xan-Man said you liked it. And they're having this V-Day thing going on; like, buy one get your girl's meal free or whatever it was, so I figured why not. Ain't gonna complain about food, especially when half of it's free."
Well, that was almost romantic. Almost.
Buffy did like The Olive Garden and the fact that Faith would want to take her there just because she enjoyed it made her smile. Faith's frugalness left something to be desired, but Buffy also knew Faith wasn't exactly rolling in cash.
"Oh yeah, and I got something for you," Faith mentioned, like an afterthought as she grabbed her bag off the floor and started rifling though it. Buffy raised her eyebrow, intrigued, as Faith pulled out a gift wrapped box. She threw it to her and Buffy caught it easily. "Xander told me I had to buy you somethin' otherwise you'd cut off my balls. I don't get what it is with women and this fuckin' holiday; it ain't that big of a deal. Shit was invented by Hallmark to sell cards to suckers."
"You're a woman, Faith. You don't have balls," Buffy reminded her as she hurriedly unwrapped her present. "And it is a big deal, because everyone wants to be reminded that there's someone who loves them." She had a grin on her face now; this Valentine's Day wasn't turning out as bad as she expected it to. Faith was starting to earn herself some major girlfriend points back.
"I was speakin' metaphorically, B," Faith responded with this kind of 'duh' attitude. "And givin' ya a present doesn't mean I love you or anything. Just… y'know, that I dig you and whatever. I could do worse." Buffy rolled her eyes. Yeah, yeah. Tough Faith who didn't want to admit she had any real feelings. It didn't bother her; she knew what she was getting into when she started dating Faith. Actually getting her to admit that she loved her would be like pulling teeth.
It's a task Buffy had yet to find the energy for.
Buffy had finally got all the wrapping off the present and was grinning excitedly as she opened the box. Would it be chocolates? Jewelry? But her face dropped when she realized what was inside. "A vibrator?" she asked, disbelievingly. But no matter her disappointment, she couldn't help giggling a little; of course Faith would get her that.
"Yeah, a vibrator. Now ya gonna get your ass on this bed and try it out with me? Cause we got dinner reservations at six," Faith replied with a smirk. Buffy looked up at her and couldn't help but smile when she saw her girlfriend's big, suggestive grin.
"You're kind of predictable, do you know that?" Buffy said as she walked over to Faith, coming to stand at the edge of the bed. Faith sat up and grabbed her shirt, pulling her closer to her so her lips were a mere fraction away from her own.
"Yeah, but that's why ya like me," Faith told her before she kissed her, pulling her onto the bed and guiding her to lie down so she could get on top.
Yeah, that was true. Because if Faith was anyone else but Faith, Buffy was sure she wouldn't love her half as much.
- FIN -