The Consequences of Pranking Sesshoumaru
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Inuyasha. I am only admitting this under duress. Now that I have, I am going back into my hentai closet to sulk.
It had been some time since he'd seen a female that was even worthy of being in his sight - there just weren't very many attractive ones out there anymore. Youkai females were becoming rare, and ningens were, well, ningens. Most looked old before their time, and smelled bad to boot. He idly wondered why they seemed so afraid of bathing.
That brought to mind one female that was perfectly acceptable to ogle – the little miko that traveled with his brother. She was attractive, and very clean – she was almost obsessive about bathing, which was a quality he definitely could admire. He had watched her bathe many times before, and every time it was a pleasure. He even enjoyed it after she stepped from her bath – her scent was always so warm and fresh then - for an inu, scent was even more important than sight, and she delighted that sense.
Of course, the visual didn't hurt, either.
Maybe it was time to go travel with his brother's group for a little while - beyond the need to stare at some acceptable female flesh, there was Rin to consider. She always loved meeting up with his brother's pack, it gave her another child to play with, and also adequate female companionship for a time.
Yes... I will meet up with Inuyasha and his companions. The benefits at this time outweigh the disadvantage - namely being in Inuyasha's presence. Ah, well, he sighed, nothing is ever perfect.
Lifting his head, he stuck his nose into the wind and scented it, looking for the miko's attractive scent. As soon as he caught it, he turned and led his little group in that direction.
He would enjoy driving his brother nuts. He always made sure to let his brother know that he was watching the miko - getting him all riled up over it just added another point to the advantages.
After all, it was a well-known fact that he enjoyed anything that pissed his brother off.
In the end, Sesshoumaru stayed with the group for five days, and by the time he deigned to leave, Inuyasha was ready to kill something – or a lot of somethings. Even though he didn't feel that way for Kagome, that didn't mean he wanted other males ogling the girl – she was his shard-detector. No one else could have her until she'd found all the shards, simple as that.
As they walked sedately away from Inuyasha's group, Rin skipped up to walk beside her Lord, and smiling brightly up at him, asked, "Lord Sesshoumaru? What is a h-hentai?"
He looked down at the girl, wide-eyed for a moment, before forcibly plastering his usual stoic expression back on.
"Where did you hear that word, Rin?"
"Shippo told me. He said that you are a hentai, but when I asked him what he meant, he said to ask you." She frowned thoughtfully. "He did say it had to do with bathing, and Kagome-sama, my Lord." She looked up again her face all innocent and sweet. "So... what is a hentai?"
Sesshoumaru swallowed hard and considered the many ways to kill a kitsune.
Shippo was extremely nervous.
At the time he'd told Rin that her Lord was a hentai, he'd laughed his little rear off at the idea of Sesshoumaru, king of icicles, explaining something like that to the little human girl.
However, now, several weeks later, he was re-thinking his amusement – they were heading into the western lands, and it was a sure bet they'd be crossing the Lord of them at some point in time while there.
He just knew he was going to die on this particular trip.
Sure enough, one evening as he, Inuyasha, and Miroku were sitting in their night's camp waiting for the girls to come back from their bath, Shippo's doom strolled right into the little clearing. "Inuyasha. Why are you in my lands?"
"Just passing through, that's all, bastard," he snorted. "Got a problem with it?"
Sesshoumaru's golden gaze reddened for a second as it landed on a frozen kitsune. "Half-breed, if you give me five minutes alone with the kit, you may move here for all I care," he said, glee lighting up his face at the panicked scent coming from the cowering kit.
Looking back and forth suspiciously between the terrified kitsune and his brother, he asked, "What the hell'd he do to you?"
Sesshoumaru stared hard at the brat being held firmly by Inuyasha. "He told my innocent young ward to ask me what a hentai was."
Inuyasha shook his head. "That was stupid, Shippo." He glanced at his brother. "Promise not to kill him, or hurt him too badly, and you can have him."
"You have my word."
Inuyasha grinned and tossed Shippo to him. "There ya go," he said, cheerfully, as he watched his brother disappear into the trees with a squirming Shippo.
Sesshoumaru leered down at the kit, who stared back at him with huge eyes as though mesmerized.
"Hello, little kitling," he cooed, eyes turning red. "Did you think that I wouldn't get ahold of you sooner or later?"
Shippo promptly fainted.
True to his word, Sesshoumaru walked back into their camp three minutes later with a still unconscious kit, and Kagome, who had just gotten back from her bath, instantly freaked.
"What did you do to him?" She ran up to the youkai lord and grabbed Shippo from him, cradling him in her arms.
"I merely frightened the living daylights out of him, miko. He will think twice before trying to prank this Sesshoumaru again. He is not harmed, as I promised the half-breed he would not be." Smirking, he turned and moved off, satisfied with his revenge.
Kagome, on the other hand, had turned to Inuyasha, and was giving him the death glare...
It looked like more revenge was on the menu for the night.
A/N: This little short was originally part of my Hentai series over on the Inu/Kags side of the fandom. But I just couldn't resist modifying it and posting this version – I crack up everytime I think of the stoic Sesshoumaru being asked something like that by little Rin.
And of course, I have fun imagining the punishment he dishes out to Shippo...