Disclaimer: I don't own The Vampire Diaries. Unfortunately.
Summary: He always thought he'd be the one to screw it up. Now he sees her for the first time and it's a major disappointment. Future fic. Something that could happen down the line for these two. One-parter.
A/N: I'm back! This is completely different from anything I've ever written before and I'm not sure I pulled it off. First of all, it's written from Damon's POV, which is new for me, but I kind of like it. He's so complicated and in this story he goes through a rollercoaster of emotions and it was a challenge to capture all of that. I hope I succeeded somewhat. It's not a happy story, no witty banter. It's different. It's sad. But I think that Damon and Elena will never have their happily ever after and I think something like this could happen down the line for them. I hope not though. ;-)
Damon dragged himself down the stairs, frowning slightly as he buttoned up his shirt. Who had the audacity to disturb him at this hour? Granted, it was morning, but just barely and those who knew him knew better than to expect him to be up at this hour and that could only mean one thing: they were too brave for their own good. The brave soul that was on the other side of the door was damn impatient though, the doorbell having rung a grand total of eight times now. He'd tried to ignore it, tried to call out to his boring brother who simply hadn't responded and eventually had dragged himself out of bed, curious about this human being whose neck he quite possibly just had to snap. There was something to look forward to.
As he reached the bottom step, his brow furrowed even further as he picked up on the familiar scent and heartbeat. He approached the door and casually opened it. Without even looking up, he turned back around and finished the last few buttons as he headed towards the giant living room.
"You're ringing the doorbell now? At this hour? You're on dangerous grounds, lady." He murmured, his prior annoyance already fading away. "Lost your key?"
It took him a second to realize that the expected response didn't come and her cheery voice didn't fill up his ears. He turned around. His girl was still standing in the doorway, arms crossed, barely looking at him.
"You made me get out of bed and now you're not even coming inside?" He asked, taking in her hunched over posture and the red stripes covering the parts of her face that weren't hidden behind the loose strands of hair that had very conveniently fallen into place there. "Elena?"
She finally looked up and he had to admit that he was taken aback by the look in her eyes. It was easy to identify. They almost pleaded with him while the guilt almost yelled out at him. He swallowed, alarm bells going off in his head, but he decided to ignore them. He was good at that. Always had been.
"How was the party? Sort of expected you to crawl up against me at some point last night. Did you pull an all-nighter?" He asked, pretending everything was okay as he tried to smirk. "Totally hung-over now? High School parties aren't what they used to be. Of course my frame of reference is sort of outdated."
"Damon…" Her soft voice then sounded, already breaking.
He hesitated for just a second. Then he sighed. "Who died?"
She shook her head. "Nobody."
"Okay. So it can't be that bad. Get inside. Close the door." He rationalized. "I'll make you breakfast."
She just stared at him from her spot in the doorway. Their eyes were still locked as Damon desperately searched for something else in them other than desperation and guilt. There had to be something else and there had to be a sign that it wasn't directed at him. Whatever was about to happen, couldn't happen. There had to be a way around it. He just had to find it.
She finally took a step forward, closing the door behind her without turning around or her gaze ever leaving his. She carefully approached him, standing still in front of him.
"You okay?" His gentle voice then sounded.
Again, she shook her head, tears starting to flow now. "No."
Now it was his turn to cross his arms as he turned his head away for just one second, trying to find the courage to continue this situation.
"Just cut to the chase, Elena. I'm a big boy, I can handle it."
Her unsteady breathing revealed that she was trying to stop herself from bursting into tears and sobbing uncontrollably. It took her a few seconds to get this under control, then she focused on him again.
"I did something." She then spoke, instantly starting to cry again. "Something bad."
Her hands reached out to him and she placed them on his lower arms that were still crossed and resting against his abdomen. He instantly took her hands in his and pushed them back to her side.
"What did you do?" He asked, darkness showing in his voice.
"Please…" She started, looking up at him. "Damon…"
"What did you do, Elena?" His voice sounding more dangerous than he'd ever used on her before. The moment seemed to call for it.
It broke his heart to see her crying like that, to see her hurting like that, but he also knew that he wasn't going to like what was going to come out of her mouth next.
"I kissed Stefan." She blurted.
For the first time in a century and a half of being undead he now experienced how true it was that words could be like a slap in the face. He wasn't easily impressed or shocked, wasn't one to be surprised by what other people said or did. He always expected the worst from them, never believed in the good of people. Except with her. He trusted her. It had taken him a while, but she'd successfully won him over. And now she'd shattered it, all of it, with just three little words. Words he'd always expected to hear at some point when they first got together, but words that had drifted to the back of his mind lately, since they'd begun to sound too surreal, almost impossible. He'd started to believe. In them.
He was a fool.
"I don't know why…" Elena continued. "…It didn't…"
"Mean anything?" He added bitterly, stepping away from her.
She immediately closed the distance between them again, placing her hands on his chest, her head down as she was obviously still crying, sobbing even.
"Please!" She exclaimed, her fingers slowly grabbing his shirt, pulling him closer. "It was stupid. I was just… stupid."
Damon involuntarily allowed her to pull him towards her. Her head went up as his own lowered and their foreheads touched. He closed his eyes.
"Please…" She whispered, her hands moving from his chest to his neck, gently wrapping her fingers around them in a loving gesture, her thumbs softly moving across his skin.
He swallowed heavily, then roughly removed her hands as he stepped back once again.
"Please what, Elena? What do you want?"
"I want you." Her desperate voice echoed through the house. "You."
"Yeah, I bet that's what you were thinking while kissing my brother last night. How much you want me."
Their eyes were locked as she started to shake her head.
"I want to be honest, Damon. That's why I'm here. It was a party, I'd been drinking… Stefan and I are done. Have been done for so long, you know that."
"Sticking your tongue down his throat doesn't exactly fit my definition of 'done'."
"I'm sorry." Her soft voice sounded again. "But I'm here to tell you that it was a mistake and that I wish I could take it back. We can't just give up on what we have, Damon. We can't. You and I are…"
"Done." He interrupted her, pure conviction shining through his voice. "You and I are done."
Surprise filled her eyes, tears welling up in them once again.
"My brother, Elena. Of all people. After everything…"
"I know, but…"
Suddenly he found himself chuckling, much to the surprise of Elena. "It's funny. It is. I've always known this wouldn't last forever. I've known we wouldn't get our happily ever after, because you're you and I'm me. But lately I thought I'd be the one to screw it up. Like I do. Like I've always done. And it terrified me, Elena. Just the thought of letting you down. See where the funny part comes in? The part where I'm the biggest idiot on the planet?"
"You're not." She whispered, shaking her head. "Please, Damon."
"We're done." He finalized the decision, looking directly at her and giving her a final nod. Then he turned around, facing the fire place. He didn't recognize the burning pain in his chest, even though he'd always believed heartbreak wasn't new to him. He was wrong. But he didn't want it, didn't want to feel this. It didn't surprise him that it was relatively easy to push the pain away by replacing it with another emotion that he was familiar with. The one that had always suited him the best, made him comfortable. He wasn't even sure who it was directed at, if it was her or him or himself. After all, who does that? Who allows himself to be vulnerable again when over a hundred and fifty years of living had told him, screamed at him, that it was the worst idea and never ended well? He deserved this. He's the one who should've known better.
The anger that boiled up inside of him felt good in a way. Superior. They wouldn't get him down, even heartbreak wouldn't break him.
Her gentle touch on his shoulder brought him over the edge. He didn't even think as he had her up against the wall in less than a second, his forearm pressing against her throat. Shock and fear filled up her eyes, that last one bringing out the familiar grin as he looked down on her. She was afraid of him? Good.
"You. Need. To leave." He spat at her, gritting his teeth, his eyes wild and intimidating, the irony and poetry of those words not lost on him, but still unintentional. They'd come full circle.
"Leave, Elena. Or I swear to God…"
He hated himself for the hint of humanity that still showed. He wasn't entirely immune to her. Not yet.
"Or what?" She objected. "You'll hurt me?"
Her voice sounded courageous, apparently having decided not to give up without a fight.
"I'll kill you. I will. Slowly. Painfully. Irreversibly." He assured her, back in control of his emotions. Or perhaps completely out of control. It was hard to tell. He lingered on the final word just a little too long as his face hovered over hers, their lips dangerously close, just to get the full impact.
He then released her from his tight grip. She brought her hand to her neck and he realized he'd already hurt her. It didn't affect him. He didn't care. She finally dared to look up at him again.
"I love you."
"You should try that bit on my brother. Maybe he'll fall for it." Damon nodded, unaffected. "I'm over it. I see you, Elena. For the first time, I see you. It's a major disappointment."
"Don't do this…" Elena continued. "You can shut me out, cut me out of your life..."
"Done and done." He interrupted her. "You made that very easy."
"…but don't shut the world out." She pleaded with him. "You're better than this. I've seen it."
"Yeah. I'm bored with this conversation. Get out. Now."
He didn't even raise his voice, but he knew how it sounded. Dangerous, cruel, definite. She swallowed back the tears, then nodded.
"Okay. Bye, Damon."
He smiled in that fake way he mastered so well over the years.
"Bye, Katherine." He smirked. "Oh wait, that's not right. Or is it? I'm confused."
The sarcasm was hard to miss, but it made him feel good. His eyes locked with hers as he almost dared her to object, but he knew she wouldn't. Her eyes showed defeat. And pain. He'd hurt her with that. Just like he intended. His grin grew wider and with that more convincing. She looked away, then slowly headed towards the door.
"Seriously." He called after her as she kept walking. "I'm confused. Katherine? Elena?"
His maniacal chuckle filled the house as the door slammed shut behind her. He shook his head, while smirking. He felt good. Really good. He fixed his collar.
"I'm hungry." He muttered.
He was back. And the upcoming bloodshed was on her. He was Damon Salvatore, monster of Mystic Falls. He'd missed him.
A/N: Well...was it any good? I just don't know. Please let me know. Hopefully I'll be able to have a full story up again soon. Just need to get inspired. ;-)