Harry was still in the hospital, the angelic nurse comes every morning to change his bandage, to feed him, help him to get to the toilet, he is more of something he has never wanted to be than what he used to be.

If he could he would laugh about how stupid he was, he would say something like "yeah kids, drugs are bad" but he has decided that talking was a waste of time, actually there was nothing to say. more like everything important has been already said.

he was killing time by thinking about his last phone. last person he talked to was Marion and then everything was blurry, he got into jail and ended up in the hospital. everything else isn't important just her, strange they have said you will know how much you love something when you loose it. "true words, bro. true words" he mumbled while looking from the window from the Sacramento hospital. it was raining there and still he couldn't accept that his proud brooklyn ass is in Sacramento, on the west. they used to make fun of a guy called Hank, he was from California, moved to New York when he was 10 and he and his classmates made fun of him because he looked like the Hollywood ken. no surprises, of course they gave him a hard time. those little memories kept Harry alive every day. life has become more of a living in the past than in the present. what was present? they told him to stay 3 months in the hospital, another 3 were waiting for him in the prison, who knows what is worse. maybe they will set him free after 3 months, maybe his hand it's enough of a punishment for them, who cares, anyway? what is worse? jail? his thought were back to memories, to Ty this time. he has been thinking about him for a long time, he left him there all alone. what is he doing now? they surely give him a piece of shit hard time.

Harry looks at his arm, maybe he could use a phone, maybe he can call someone, ma or Marion. hardly he can call Ty but there was no one else to call, no one else who would care.

he asked the nurse if he could use the phone and she agreed with her usual smile. her smile has become too pathetic, she was like that all the time, looking at him with the sadness in her eyes, it was obvious he looks like shit, why does she have to show him it like this? not cool of her, not cool he thought for himself.

he puts the receiver on his shoulder and tries to remember her phone number. 438? or 458? he decided to try the 458 and feels like this is surely the right now, no one picks it up, he thinks about the time zones, maybe she is sleeping. bullshit it's a lunchtime. on the other hand she has always been a deep sleeper... oh wait! someone has picked up the phone.


he wasn't able to say anything, he knows that everything what she has done was because of him, she has sucked lots of dicks, fucked lots of pricks and just because of him, just for him, the feeling that he is a looser was back.

he puts down the receiver and walks back to his room