A/N: Hello... eh... This is a bit awkward... Sorry for actually keeping you waiting for a whole year... Tho if ye think about dat, it was actually a bit less than a year. But that's not the point; the point is that I'm sorry... But at least I'm not done yet with this!

During this year I learned a lot of things, but the most important one I've learned is dat I'm bad at making calculations: I miscalculated what was what I really loved about my percussions class and I miscalculated my attention span; it's shortest than... whatever you see as very short... So that was my lame excuse for taking this long, and I hope ye can forgive me and dat I can at least somehow make it worth yer wait.

Disclaimer #2: Cuz I feel like adding one.

I, Ribke D'Crazy, deny any claim to any character or element from Spider-Man, The Fantastic Four or from any other comic, series or franchise mentioned in this fic. They rightfully belong to Marvell, Stan Lee and all of their rightful owners. No monetary gain is being obtained from the publication of this fic. It was only created for recreational purposes.

...Or my name is not Roberta Ximena Hernández Gutiérrez... which is not.

P.S. I don't own the reference to "Courage the Cowardly Dog" either.

Chapter 5:

Congratulations Peter!

Aunt May was just arriving from her trip to the convenience store. She had bought all the ingredients for that wonderful recipe she had seen on that TV program for that home-made hair dye her friend Anne had told her about (hey, she just didn't think gray hair looked so sexy on her anymore). Some eggs, cucumber, hand cream and many other stuff I won't be naming cuz I really have no idea what the heck it is, or how the heck is it even supposed to serve as a hair dye (lazy writing, I know).

She was just about to enter when she heard a window shatter, she was about to go see what happened when she started hearing a lot of loud noises coming from the house. It was your typical CRASH, BANG, PAM and the random cat growling, which was weird considering they didn't have a cat. Right when she was about to open the door it banged open (fortunately she was away enough for the door to not be squashed by it, cuz we all know it's not funny to torture innocent old ladies in any kind of story) and Peter came out running at super-sonic speeds: "Hi aunt May! Bye aunt May!" was all he said in just half a second before he was halfway across the street and disappeared around a corner. May, dizzy from all the spins she had given due to the strong gust of wind caused by her nephew, stopped spinning and was having difficulty standing; only a minute later she noticed the cat that was clinging to her head with a traumatized cattish-look like its cattish-life depended on it.

Since when did they have a cat anyways?

Gwen was waiting in the cinema's entrance. She looked at her watch: 7:50. Only ten minutes for the appointed time that Peter was supposed to be there. If he broke his promise, as much as it would hurt her, she would have no choice but to dump him for good. If he couldn't take her seriously enough, perhaps it would be for the best they weren't together anymore. A hard choice, but necessary.

"Hey Gwen!" she heard someone call behind her. She turned around to see the friendly face of Harry Osborn. Since he was Peter's best friend, he also became her friend after she became Peter's girlfriend, even though they never paid any attention to each other before that. But she discovered that Harry was actually a very nice person to be with, and Harry discovered the reason why his best friend liked her so much.

"Oh, hey Harry!" she answered cheerfully. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, I invited Christine Flowers to watch a movie with me... but she hasn't arrived yet."

Gwen had a surprised look: "Christine Flowers?"

"Yeah, have you seen her?"

"Well... Uh... I think I just saw her a minute ago..."

"Oh really? Cool! Where is she?"

"Uhm..." how could she say it? "I saw here with that new exchange student..."

"WHAT? With who?"

"Yeah... In fact, I see her right there..." she pointed somewhere behind Harry.

Harry turned around to see Christine sitting in a small round table doing pretty eyes to a French dude sitting in front of her. His face turned to one of pure rage after seeing this "Raoul..." he growled menacingly. He was fuming now!

"Harry... are you okay?" Gwen asked worried.

"Yes... I just... need some time alone..." He said, not wanting her to see him like this and also wanting to at least keep some of his dignity. "Sorry Gwen, but I must go." To hell with this! He walked to the table, his intentions towards that French pretty boy not short from violent.

"Okay, as you wish..." said Gwen before walking away as far as possible. She just didn't feel like witnessing the scene Harry was most likely about to make.

Once she found a spot far enough she took another glance at her watch: 7:59. Only one minute left. She then began counting the seconds as well... Only ten seconds left... Five, four, three, two, oooooone...

"HEADS UP!" She heard someone shout. Then, before she could even turn around, she heard a lot of bangs, crashes, people (and even a cat) screaming and lots of things breaking and falling to the floor and finally a car's alarm. She finally turned around to see Peter walking away from what seconds before was just the cinema's cafeteria and now looked like a disaster zone. She then looked at her watch: exactly 8 o'clock!

"Told you I would make it!" said Peter with a grin on his face and offering her his arm, seeming somehow oblivious to the chaos he just created.

"I knew you would make it!" she answered (it was a lie, of course, but he didn't need to know), also with a smile on her face and taking his arm. They then happily entered the cinema, ignoring all the disaster and people crying for help.

Once Gwen and Peter finished deciding which movie to see (Gwen chose...) they sat in a seat in the cinema's café since there were still 30 minutes left for the movie to start (damn timing). After a few minutes of sitting there and chatting, they decided to buy some popcorn for the movie (Peter couldn't keep resisting the smell of popcorn and Gwen knew she would need something to keep him quiet during the movie). Since Peter had paid for the tickets, she decided she would buy the popcorn: "Wait for me here, ok?" Peter nodded. "No sneaking away while I'm gone, huh?" she joked. Peter only chuckled at that.

Once Gwen was out of sight, Peter decided to stretch and put his feet in one of the chairs (not the one Gwen was sitting on, of course; that would be rude). He smiled and relaxed, ignoring everything around him; even the shouts from the guard who was chasing Harry, and the disaster his friend was making in his escape: knocking people down and breaking stuff (it seems like his little fight with Raoul turned a bit too violent). But he just didn't care about that.

At last he got what he wanted! A night with Gwen; no day-saving to worry about. Only He, Gwen, a big popcorn and soda combo, maybe a little chocolate, and a nice (well if Gwen thought it was nice he would have to at least pretend he liked it as well) movie. No evildoers to bother him. Nope, no señor! This night was only his and Gwen's. Yep, nothing would take it away. N.O.T.H.I.N.G.

... Nah, just kidding kids! Now to break all of his hopes and dreams!

Peter casually glanced at a nearby window (or whatever could qualify as a window in a cinema), all seemed peaceful. He just rested his head in the chair again. But not a second after doing this he heard a big explosion from outside. He almost fell from his chair and looked at the window again. There was, a bit too conveniently, a bank right there. He could see a bunch of masked men running away from there, each carrying guns and at least two big sacks of, candy- I mean, money!

He stared at the window for a while before directing his look anywhere else: 'It's nothing the police can't take care of themselves. Plus what are a few thousands of dollars missing? It's not like this shit doesn't happen every day everywhere else, right?' he thought to calm himself. There's no way he would be leaving Gwen for something like this.

He was half-way to forgetting it when he heard another boom. He looked at the window again (bad choice) and couldn't believe his eyes. Some big, green mutant goo that seemed like it had come from the sewers was eating every product from the pharmacy that was also too conveniently placed besides the bank (there was nowhere else to put it). Peter shut his eyes and tried to look away 'Just some mutant monster; it's not like there aren't enough super heroes in the city to take care of it.'

He tried with all of his might to look away, but it became impossible, especially after hearing the third boom. He looked at the window and almost shouted a big, loud curse at what he saw: the Green Goblin was causing havoc again! Friggin Norman, it's like the tenth time he loses his memory and he had to choose exactly that night to get it back again? CURSE YOU, DEUX EX MACHINIMA; CURSE YOU TO HELL!

This time he didn't think about any excuse. He merely sank his face in his arms on the table. Could he really keep ignoring all of this? His answer came shortly after the fourth boom. He looked again at the window, calmly and very annoyed, but what he saw actually made him jump from his chair and race to the window and paste his face to it in total amazement: A FRIGGIN GIANT HAMSTER WAS DESTROYING THE TOWN! What. The. FAG? Probably another of those stupid experiments the military and all those other companies have been pulling for a while now. Really, why waste time, money and resources looking for stupid stuff like a cure for cancer, or ways to end with all the hunger on the world when you could use it in cooler stuff like giant hamsters that will destroy the whole city? DID YOU GET THE FRIGGIN SARCASM IN THAT SENTENCE? ... Oh, you did? Good.

We can only imagine Gwen's expression when she made it back and discovered her boyfriend wasn't there waiting for her like he had promised. She had never in her life reached such levels of sadness and disappointment.

She decided to go back home, not caring to watch the movie alone. She was so sad she didn't pay attention to anything but her feet as she walked. She didn't pay attention to the multiple explosions that could be heard from downtown; she didn't pay attention to the rumble of the earth caused by the giant hamster; she didn't even pay attention when Spider-Man crashed at full speed in the building right behind her. "NOW YOU MADE IT, MR. MUNCHKINS! YOU'RE GOING DOWN!" He shouted as he rushed back to combat with the giant rodent, but Gwen didn't pay attention to any of that. That's depression for you; she just kept walking home without ever looking back.

About a long while later, Peter had finally neutralized every menace, be it robbery or giant hamster, which had come that night (Do not ask how, all I can tell ye is that there were LOTS of property damage... And Norman lost his memory… AGAIN!). He searched for Gwen everywhere but couldn't find her; though it didn't surprise him at all. It had been his last chance and he had screwed up 'Congratulations Peter!' he thought 'You just friggin BLEW IT!'

A/N: Ok, sorry for the really long time. I was supposed to update yesterday but… let's just say I had a really bad day… a very bad day… Well, there were bright things that happened, but now I'm certain that I'm starting to HATE anonymous gifts (the emotion just turns into annoyance after the third one; I know it doesn't make sense that it makes me angry, it shouldn't! Sigh, but you just wouldn't understand; the cause is a bit deeper than that). Hey, I wasn't going to update 'till tomorrow, but fortunately my… writing club teacher (I have no idea how to call him) canceled tomorrow's session, so I still have a week to finish my little story.

… On more serious notes… I won't be updating anytime soon… Or at least I wouldn't expect to update anytime soon… It's just that the inspiration just comes and goes as it pleases, and apparently I have the attention span of a four year old in a sugar high (which means: very short)… Though there IS something dat could help me update faster. No, I'm not talking about reviews. I'm not one of those idiots who are like: "I'm not updating 'till I get *insert number no shorter than five here* reviews." (No offense to anyone who does this). Besides, how do reviews help update any faster? They help improve stories with constructive criticism and stuff, yes, but I see no way they can help writing faster. They are good motivations, but they just don't help to write faster. Besides, I know my stories are so friggin awesome; I leave people speechless, haha. Yeah, BEHOLD MY AWESOMENESS! No peeps, all I need you to do is PM me… That's right: PM me if you're interested in this proposition:

I need a co-author, someone who helps me write this. I need ideas, I know where I want to get, but I don't know how to get there. If someone were to lend me their talent, it would be much easier! Perhaps I wouldn't take a decade to finish this!

… Well, all I'm asking is for you to consider it. I'm accepting all help you can give me (I appreciate variety).

In more news: I'm not updating again until I finish every chapter of this story. That way either I finish this or you can just forget it and go on with your lives.

P.S. If I finish this before the decade, I'm sooo making Spidey sing "Singing in the Rain" in Spider-Man version with choreography and all at the end of this, haha!