Disclaimer: I own nothing. Note: The lyrics were from Anna Nalick - Breathe (2am) which I don't own either.
'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe.
Kyouya rolled to the side, lying on his icy, wooden floor.
He just didn't have the energy get up.
He felt like he was swirling and suffocating. The piercing coldness was the only thing keeping him holding onto reality.
He cradled his head in his hands, feeling the rivers of pent up emotion streaming through his fingertips.
He wished he could just rewrite everything.
Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,
But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,
Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.
Tamaki looked up at his ceiling. He kicked his blankets back, and just lay there, dishevelled.
He knew something was bothering Kyouya, but he didn't know what. He wanted to gather him into his arms and tell him everything that's been on his mind, but he knew that Kyouya had a lot on his mind, so he settled to just venting it to his ceiling, imagining Kyouya staring back at him,"I've noticed you haven't got that shine in your eyes, and you've been looking kinda down. I know it doesn't mean much from me, but I hate to see you like this, because you look so beautiful when you smile. I don't mean the smile you give on the outside, but the smile you give on the inside. When you smile on the inside, you may not be showing a smile, but you glow happiness and you make me feel so calm and at peace. I love when you stay after school, I pretend to concentrate on the piano, but really I'm waiting on you giving that cute little sigh, that no one else hears, and taking of your glasses, your guard, and showing me emotions that no one else gets the privilege of seeing. I love when you take off your glasses, and it's a smile in your eyes. I love seeing the shine there, but lately it hasn't been there. When we stayed late, when you sighed, it sounded defeated, and you took of your glasses and I could see the pain. I don't want you to bottle up your feelings Kyouya. I want to be someone you can share them with. I want to be the only one you can share them with. I want to be the one to make you feel happy, even when everything's telling you to be sad. I want you to be my happy Kyouya again. You may have been to controlling over your emotions, but I always knew you were happy. Just like I know you're not now. Be happy Again. Please."
There's a light at each end of this tunnel,
You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out
And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again
If you only try turning around.
Kyouya poked at the ground, running his perfectly manicured nails up the joint between the two wooden panels. Everything seemed to be too much for him, he bottled everything up, because Ootori's weren't supposed to show emotion. Emotions were weakness, and Kyouya was very weak on the inside, and his armour was starting to wear thin. He knew if he tried hard enough he could succeed, but how much of him would be left in the end? It was as if, where he was now, was who is was, he'd lose more and more of himself, the more he moved on, the more he tried, the harder it got. In the end, he didn't know what he wanted any more. Did he want to succeed over his brothers? He wasn't sure any more and as an Ootori, he should have been. He felt ashamed of his confusion, even though it was perfectly normal to change your mind, he should have known better. He was ashamed of what was making him change his mind, the very thing that helped him decide.
2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to
It was hosting hours, Kyouya was in his usual seat, with the usual black notebook in his hand, and there was the usual scratching noise of his pen, as he wrote the mystery content of his notebook. That's what it looked like to everyone else, but in fact, Kyouya was indeed sitting in his usual seat, with the usual book, but he wasn't writing the usual content. He was just doodling, writing words that popped into his mind, maybe sometimes adding some figures together. He looked at the page and nearly cried out loud as he glanced over all the hearts and the name 'Tamaki' coming up, suspiciously often.
He looked away from his book and realised that he'd sat doodling until the only people left in the room were, Himself, Hikaru and Kaoru, and Tamaki.
"Bye!" Hikaru called from the door.
"CIYA!" Kaoru chorused with his twin.
When the twins had left, Kyouya let out a sigh and set down his notebook. He stood up and realised Tamaki was standing at the other side of the table, standing to his full height, with his arms crossed and a determined look on his face.
He was making Kyouya feel small and weak. Kyouya hated how much the blond affected him. He looked up and was about to ask Tamaki what he wanted, but the words caught in his throat. He nearly cried at the look of concern in Tamaki's eyes.
Tamaki moved around the table, so Kyouya had to incline his head slightly, as Tamaki was quite a bit taller than him.
"Something's wrong." Tamaki stated, his voice sounding determined and gentle at the same time. He relaxed his frame and Kyouya felt less on edge.
Kyouya's silence egged him on to continue, "Kyouya, I know you're upset, but I don't know why. I want to help you. I want you to feel safe with me. Enough to let me see your vulnerable side."
Tamaki wound his arms around Kyouya, encasing him in his protecting hug. "I need you to open up to me. I hate seeing you like this Kyouya."
Kyouya clutched onto Tamaki's shirt and rested his head onto Tamaki's shoulder, "I love you."
Neither one knew who had said it, but it didn't matter, it hit both hard. It was a statement that sent shivers up both their spines.
Tamaki looked down, tilting Kyouya's head upward, he leaned in and ghosted his lips over Kyouya's. It was enough to make Kyouya's knees go weak.
Tamaki was practically holding him up as the embraced in a dazed fantasy. It seemed so unreal. Everything they wanted, everything that was bothering them, seemed to melt away as Tamaki gently took Kyouya's glasses off, and pressed a soft kiss on his quivering lips. Tamaki whispered sweet, calming words.
"You don't need to be scared, just breathe. I'm here. "
I know, they're both really OOC. I tried. I really did.
But Kyouya's meant to be a little OOC.
Anyway, if you liked, review.
I might write another few chapters if this gets reviews. :)but until then it's staying as complete.
So if you want another chapter tell me in a review, or message me. :)