Okay, this merits some explanation. I don't really like name-smooshing, so I entitle my ships with different things. Alek/Deryn is Whaleshipping, because...they're on a flying whale...

Just some random spoofs of Leviathan, which may or may not include other random characters.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of this; it all belongs to Scott Westerfeld, etc., etc., etc.

It was a cold and rainy day. Aleksandar von Hohenberg, Emperor of Austria-Hungary, sat on his throne, his bored fingers drumming the armrest. Lightning flashed in the sky, shortly followed by a crackle of thunder. So...bored, thought Alek. What I wouldn't give to be back on the Leviathan with


The doors crashed open, and lightning flashed in the sky, silhouetting the figure of a tall woman in the doorway. She strode in and stormed her way up to the throne, shrieking "Alek, you bum-rag!"

"What-who-who are you?" squeaked Alek, trembling in the fiery aura of the stranger.

"Don't remember? Maybe this'll help jog your memory!" She stomped up to the throne, leaned forward, and slapped him on the face. Hard. Then, she strode back to the door, again, the guards too shocked to do anything but watch.

Alek stared incredulously at the still swinging doors. "Deryn?"

. . .

As she stepped outside the palace, Deryn Sharp smothered a giggle. Finally, after five years seething in anger, planning her revenge, two weeks in a dingy inn, waiting for a thunderstorm, and ten minutes outside the palace doors, waiting for the perfect moment to enter, her hard work had paid off. And the look on Alek's face when she slapped him? Priceless.

(Tally meets Deryn)

"Your hair, is like, soooo unfashionable."


"And your clothes, are like soooo 1914"


"And you live, like inside a whale. Like, how bogus is that?"


(Harry and Hermione meet Deryn)


"Hermione? Hermione!" Harry experimentally waved a hand in front of Hermione's face, but she was completely ignoring him, bouncing up and down with excitement, pointing at a woman in the distance.


The woman spun around. " Er...who are you...and why are you hugging me?" For Hermione had just launched herself at the woman and latched herself onto her.

"I'm Hermione Granger, I'm like your biggest fan. I've read sooooo much about you, you're in sooooo many books! EEEEEEEEEE! I'm talking to Deryn Sharp!"


"Gasp!" Hermione unlatched herself from Deryn and turned to Harry, a shocked expression on her face. "How can you not have heard of Deryn Sharp! She's, like, soooo famous, even more famous than you! So, would you-"

"More famous than me?" Harry said indignantly.

"-like to join S.P.E.W.? If everyone knew you were supporting us, then we'd get soooooo many more people!"


Wooo, crossovers! Please Review, and thank you for reading! :D