MOTHER OF SORROWS

By D. M Evans

Rating – R for dark violent content

SPOILERS – Takes place sometime season three

Summary – Dru decides to pay back Angel for all the things he did to her while mortal, starting with his son.

Distribution – fanfiction.net

Disclaimer – Don't own them, never will, don't even WANT to own Connor.

A.N. – I heard of a "Die Connor Die" challenge third hand and knew I had to work up something for it even though I don't belong to the list that started it. By NO means do I condone hurting children and wish no violence on any child. However this little awful plot contrivance that is Connor really must go and this is just one way to do it. If you like the baby or if dark stuff depresses you find another story. I won't mind.

A.N 2 – My apologies to the Mother of Sorrows Catholic Church for including them in this. It was merely the perfect name for this piece.

AN 3 – Yes Dru is written more lucid than she normally is. Since the story is from her pov I thought having her totally raving would just be confusing and I figure she is capable of mass destruction on her own so she must have some lucid moments

Dedication – S. J. Smith for bringing the challenge to my attention in the first place.



Drusilla sat across the street from the Hyperion. She was half surprised none of Daddy's little helpers noticed her in the shadows. How many were there? What had grand-mummy said? Three, she thought. The young black man had left the building first. Dru almost followed him. The way he moved, he promised to be prey worthy of the hunt but that wasn't why she was here. The next two left together, the dark-haired man and the lovely girl who used to own the boy Dru loved for a night. They got into a sporty car and were gone. That suited Dru. She needed them to be elsewhere if she were to do this easily. If they came back then she would enjoy killing them.

Finally the one she wanted most came out and faded off into the night. There seemed to be something very off with how Angel moved. He had lost his predator's edge. Dru didn't doubt she could sneak right up on Daddy and hurt him worse than he had ever hurt her. And she would do just that. She knew how. Darla had told her all she needed to know. She knew of the parasite that had been growing inside of grand-mummy. That's how Darla had always described the developing child. Darla had left Dru to try and rid herself of the baby. Dru's visions had shown her Darla hadn't been successful. A plan sprang full born from those visions.

Dru hurt. She was all alone and she didn't like it. She felt dark and forlorn. Dru hated being lonely. Granted she had been the one who left Spike and when she was ready to forgive him he was too hurt by misplaced love, his teeth pulled by science and he didn't want her any more. Grand- mummy hadn't been good company but at least she had kept the loneliness away. But what Angel had done to Darla made her leave. He took yet another person from Dru. He was the one who forced her into this long lonesome. It was time to pay him back for that. Dru didn't know how far into the hotel she could get. It was a business. She knew that much from Darla but people lived there and she didn't have an invite.

It pleased her to get past the front door. She looked around the lobby just drinking in the warm spicy scent that she associated with Angel. But it was soured by several unpleasant underlying odors; old milk, diapers, spit-up and things Dru didn't want to think about.

"Can I help you?"

Dru turned slowly, cocking her head at the stick-thin woman, her lips peeling back in a beatific smile. Cradled in Twiggy's arms was the object of Dru's quest. Dru ran her hands over her silky hair. "I'm a friend of Angel's, an old dear friend."

"I'm afraid you just missed him. What's your name so I can tell him you were here? I'm Fred by the way."

"My name is written in the stars." Drusilla's eyes rolled up toward the ceiling as she swayed. "If you listen they whisper, Drusilla."

Fred simply stared at her. "I don't think I've ever heard him talk about you."

Dru pouted. "How naughty of him. Is this his little star?" Dru ran a finger over the baby's downy head.

Fred's eyes lit up. "Oh, you know about Connor. Wonder why Angel's never mentioned you. Than again I've only been here a short time. I don't know all his friends. Still, Angel's not the very friendly type, not that that means he's a bad person. And you'd think a close friend like you say you are would have been here sooner. Where have you been? Angel really could use help with Connor. Not that Cordy and I-"

"Fred, do you ever shut up," Dru broke in bluntly, a cross look passing over her thin heart-shaped face.

Fred stepped back as if slapped. Dru pressed forward, sliding an arm around the baby, tearing him from Fred's grasp.

"Hey! You'll hurt the baby." Fred cried, trying to take back the crying infant.

"Oh, I will but not until Angel can see." Dru waltzed the baby over to Cordy's desk and put him on top.

"You have to go. I'm not going to let you hurt Connor," Fred said, grabbing for Connor.

Dru turned to Fred, her game face on. "How will you stop me?"

Fred whirled, trying to make a run for the weapon's closet. She didn't make two steps before Dru caught her. But when the vampire tried to bite Fred, an invisible force repulsed her. Dru stared at Fred puzzled. Remembering the Sirens' wardings on the place, Fred knew even if she got a weapon she wouldn't be able to use it either. She raced past Dru, grabbed Connor and ran. Dru went after her. Too late did Fred realize that she was being herded outside, not until she stumbled into the courtyard of the hotel.

Dru lunged for Fred again as the cool night breeze kissed her cheek for luck. She grabbed Fred now that there wasn't a spell to stop her. Fred shrieked as Dru played with her like a cat with a mouse, forcing her to drop Connor. The baby screamed as Dru snagged him by the ankles before he hit ground. She eased him onto the grass, never letting go of Fred who weaved on her feet, under Dru's mesmerization. Dru drained her, holding back just enough blood to inscribe something on the lobby floor. She watched the light flicker out of Fred's wide eyes as she dripped her own blood between the girl's slack lips. She arranged her properly, scooped up Connor and carried him off into the gloom.

* * *

Angel stared at Fred's lifeless body, laid out precisely on the grass of Hyperion's courtyard. Flowers from Cordy's desk were displayed at her head and feet.

"Someone has Connor," Cordy whispered. She and Wes had been the first to return home and called Angel on his mobile. Angel said nothing. He just stood there, clenching and unclenching his fists.

"They left a clue," Wes ventured hesitantly as if afraid the vampire's building rage would vent on him. "'Mother of Sorrows' written in blood has to mean something."

"It's where I have to go," Angel said, his voice flat and awful.

"You know what it means?" Wes looked surprised.

Angel gave an abrupt nod of his head then turned on heel, stalking back inside, moving for the first time in months like the predator he was. Wes and Cordelia followed him.

"I don't understand," Cordy said.

Angel ignored her, plucking several stakes and a sword out of the weapons' closet. "You don't have to." He tossed a stake to Wes who stared at it uncomprehendingly. "Use it on Fred."

"Angel! She is…was our friend," Cordy protested, her dark eyes wide.

"She's dead," he snarled, stabbing a finger toward the courtyard. "That's a classic rebirth pose Fred's laid out in. Flowers, the night sky…"

"She's been turned," Wesley said, half question, half statement. "Drusilla did something like this for Darla, didn't she?" His mouth opened in a perfect O then snapped shut. "You think Drusilla took Connor."

"I know she did." Angel flipped the phone book on Cordy's desk open and frantically scanned the church listings. "Mother of Sorrows was the name of the convent where I caught and turned Dru."

"What do you want us to do?" Wesley asked.

"Take care of Fred."

"Oh no! We're coming with you," Cordy said, taking Angel's arm.

He jerked away. "This is my fight!"

"This goes beyond that. We're talking about your son," Cordy protested, taking hold of him again.

Angel's face morphed as he shoved her so hard she ended up on her back side. "Do you think I need to be reminded? Dru's not your run of the mill vampire. She can mesmerize people. She's killed a Slayer. You two will only get in the way," Angel growled and was out the door before they could argue more. He flattened Cordy's tires just to be sure they didn't follow before speeding off in his GTX.

* * *

Mother of Sorrows loomed before him. Angel hated going into churches, too much that could hurt him on hand; holy water, crosses, wooden pews that could be broken into weapons but he knew he had the right place the moment he crossed the threshold. Hundreds of candles, flames dancing in the still air, lit the church. The holy mother's visage stared blissfully down at him in the soft light. Smells of beeswax warred with the stench of a ripe diaper. Connor, wailing like a banshee, lay on the altar in a heap of blankets.

Angel slowly inched up the aisle looking for Dru but his son's cries overrode his innate sense of caution. He ran to the altar, snatching his son off of it. He held Connor to him, cooing at him as he turned to flee. He never saw the altar cloth lift up and a cattle prod thrust out. It hit him in the small of his back. Angel bellowed as the electricity coursed through him. Connor shrieked as his father's convulsing limbs battered him. Angel dropped, his body cushioning the baby's fall.

Dru crawled out from her hiding spot under the altar, grinning at the cattle prod. "My Spike was right. These are beautiful tools. She tossed it aside, put the screaming baby back on the altar then set to work on Angel.

When Angel woke up agony reminded him how foolish he had been. Connor had been making him more and more careless and now both he and his son were going to pay for it. Angel glanced down at the fiery pain on his belly and saw he had been stripped to the waist and a cross placed on him. From above liquid fire rained down on him, holy water that had been put into Connor's sippy cup dangling above him from where he was chained to the side altar. Angel managed to twist enough to dislodge the cross but couldn't get away from the slow drip of the holy water.

Dru sat cross-legged on the altar with Connor in her arms, singing softly to him. She smiled sweetly when she realized Angel was awake and watching her. "My Mummy used to sing me that song, do you remember, Angel? Before you bit out her throat."

Angel swallowed hard. Dru was always unpredictable. He didn't know how to play a game when the rules always changed. This was more his fault than he could bear to think about. "Yes, Dru. I remember. Dru, sweetie, let me go and we can talk about it. Put Connor down."

Dru let her head drop back as she stared up at the holy mother of sorrows. Her dark hair cascaded down her back. "No, Daddy, I like you right where you are. Holy Mary, mother of God, where were you when the dark angel came to visit me? I hope you're in the same place tonight."

"Dru, please. Don't hurt Connor. He's just a baby, an innocent," Angel pleaded, recognizing the hunter's look in Dru's eyes. He struggled against his bond.

She giggled. "I was innocent once. It didn't stop you. My beautiful sisters were innocent until you killed them. You killed everyone I ever loved."

"I'm so sorry, Dru. Hurt me. Pay me back for that but don't hurt Connor," Angel said, understanding what this was about.

Dru hopped off the altar. "You didn't even want me to have someone to love me, always trying to drive away my sweet Spike. Always fighting. Always hurting him." She danced Connor back and forth like a teddy bear, ignoring his frantic cries. "Why was that, Daddy? Why must I always be alone with no one to love?"

"Dru, there is nothing I can do to repay you for the things I did but Connor shouldn't have to suffer for them." Angel had heard somewhere that repeating someone's name personalized him to a potential killer, making it harder to kill. It had never stopped him but Dru might be made of softer stuff. There was still something feminine and gentle in her with the way she treated Miss Edith. Then again she punished her doll for imagined infractions all the time.

Dru lightly kissed Connor's head. "Shall I forgive Daddy?" She proffered the baby to Angel.

His broad-planed face radiated hope as a sigh of relief escaped his lips. He reached out to Connor. "Thank you, Dru."

Just as his fingertips touched the baby, she snatched him away. "I don't think so. Everyone I ever loved, Angel. Everyone! Do you know what it feels like to lose everyone, Daddy? You can't know how you made me suffer. My family…my heart. You made me think I was from hell because of the things I saw then you sent me there. I'll show you the mercy you showed me."

"Dru, no! Please, no," Angel sobbed. "You don't want to do this."

She scowled. "Always telling me what I think. Poor mad Dru, all cobwebby upstairs, doesn't know what to think, what to feel. I'll tell you, Daddy. I hurt. I've hurt for too long. Too late for me now. Too late for you." Dru shifted Connor onto her hip, holding him with one hand. She levered herself back up on the altar and lifted a gold chalice. She waved it through the light of the candles. "Look at it sparkle. It talks to me."

"What….what does it say, Dru?" he said forcing himself to be calm. Dru's moods were mercurial. If he could keep her talking, he might just be able to talk her out of it. He kept fighting with his bonds but Dru had anchored him firmly. He had taught her too well.

"That it's time to teach you the pain you taught me." Dru waved at him with her manicured nails, metallic blue chrome with icy tips. With one smooth motion those nails went through Connor's delicate neck. As Angel's anguished howl filled the church, his son's blood filled the chalice. Dru drank from the cup, blood dribbling off her chin.

She sprang off the altar, beaming at the sound of the animal cry coming out of Angel's throat. She grabbed his hair and dumped the chalice over his opened mouth. Angel sputtered on his son's lifeblood then was silent except for the panting moans that made a short staccato rhythm before fading away.

Dru set the chalice back on the altar, lifted Connor gently, pressing her lips to his head. She laid the lifeless body on his father's stomach. She squatted next to Angel who was limp, almost lifeless, himself.

"Maybe I should have had a nice young stud to make love to me like you and Darla did while I lay suffering. Everyone I ever loved, Angel, for everyone you ever loved. I'll be back for the rest of them some day." She swooped in to kiss his forehead.

Angel made no move to stop her. He was still in the same state of catatonic shock when Wesley and Cordy finally made it to the church and freed him. He remained so throughout the time it took for Wesley to arrange for Connor's burial.

* * *

"He frightens me," Cordy whispered to Gunn and Wesley, peering down the stairs Angel had disappeared down leaving a trail of blue blood behind him. "All he does is fight and brood." Whatever romantic silliness she had thought about in regards to Angel died along with Connor. The predatory creature that haunted the hotel reminded her too much of Sunnydale and things she had desperately wanted to leave behind.

"He's a vampire. He's supposed to," Gunn retorted.

Cordy eyed him silently. "You know what I mean."

"Of course we do but Gunn has a point. Angel is a killer, Cordelia," Wesley said. "He is supposed to be taking care of things even darker than he for the Powers that Be. For too long, he set that burden aside."

"He had more important things on his mind," Cordy argued. "He's never going to recover from this."

"Maybe he wasn't meant to. Maybe he became too complacent, too lax. Last time that happened, he became Angelus. This time it cost him his son. He's doing what he has to because now he sees what the cost is for ignoring his destiny," Wesley said.

"I can't believe you're so cold about it," Cordy snapped.

"Give English a break. This is rough on all of us. But Angel is doing what he needs to do. Maybe it'll make him feel better some day. If not, the world's still a better place for his work," Gunn said. "No one knows what became of this Dru chick do they?"

Wesley shook his head. "No, but she'll turn up. She always does."

"I hope she does." Gunn's eyes slotted as his fists balled. "I have to settle up with her for Fred."

"We all feel that way. I was there when Dru came to kill Kendra the Slayer. She's very scary," Cordy said with a shiver.

"I'm scarier," Gunn growled.

Angel listened to their voices standing just out of sight on the stairs then he continued his way down to his den. All traces of Connor had been erased from the hotel, all photos put away until he could bear to see them again. He couldn't even hate Dru for what she had done. He had done worse to her. Still, he would kill her for this some day. Until then, he would kill any demon that showed its face in L. A. Maybe Gunn was right. The world would be a better place for it and he owed Connor that much.