Disclaimer: I don't own the characters and this time I don't even own the content of the chapter! That's Charlaine Harris and various fanfiction authors respectively. The only thing I own is the concept of this story :D
A/N: I updated earlier than I though I'd be able to! Yay!
Soo...last one! You ready? Oh...remember, THIS IS FOR FUN, if you think you will be offended, let me suggest something...navigate away and read something else!
I've not changed much of the wording of what you all gave me. If I have it is only because upon editing, I found something which flowed better. And obviously I've edited any grammar or spelling mistakes.
Ali989969 : grumble to the authors
I hate when Jason gets killed of pre-story. His pretty dimness and pseudo protective crap adds to stories.
Secretkpt: grumble to the authors
To the authors who write like 70 chapters then just quit, like cold turkey never to be heard from again. Yeah that's a huge huge issue! I feel stood up. I can't imagine how the characters must feel. Can you imagine being in the middle of a romance scene and not finishing it?
Opalsfire : Grumble to the characters on behalf of the authors
Dear characters, grow up you are kind of like little dollies in our play house. Sometimes we like to use you on our own ideas for your universe, so suck it up butter up! Now everyone play nice... Heh heh heh... Even you Eric. :)
Ashmoo2000 : Retort to Debbie Pelt
Shut up Debbie! Stop spreading your crazy! Yeah, I said it! YOU ARE CRAZY!
Number 1 sign that tells you that you are crazy 1) you try to kill someone who is already dead i.e.: Lafayette. Just saying. Thought you should know.
Stop hating on sookie, she don't want Alcide.
Vikt0ria : Grumble to Alan Ball!
After watching Episode 45 of TB Viktoria calls Mr. B…
"Mista Beez awffice." A woman's voice answered snapping her gum.
"I'd like to speak to Mr. B please." Viktoria asks.
"Mr. B" he answers on speaker.
"Mr. B, my name is Viktoria and I write FanFiction I got a bone to pick with you." she says.
"Francine, why the hell are you letting nut cases through? I'm a very busy man!" he yells while pressing buttons on the phone "How the hell do you hang up this phone!" he calls out.
"Now you listen to me Mister… do you have my computer bugged? 'Cause twice now I've written something and before I get to post it, something eerily similar happens on your show." Viktoria says through the beeping… the beeping stops.
"Yeah right, like you don't "borrow" from me… Yvetta… the dayroom… need I say more?" he said sarcastically.
"Oh Pfft! Whatever just stop beating me to the punch… and give me a break I don't make millions for my ** like you do for yours…" before Mr. B could answer "Come on V back me up here!" she hisses into the phone.
"Ah… yeah it's true I read her rough draft before the show aired." Vilannh says.
"FINE!" Mr. B snaps.
"FINE!" Viktoria quips. They both hang up at the same time. Vilannh sighs.
" Divas." She says rolling her eyes and hanging up.
Vicky199416: Grumble to the authors
Dear fanfic authors
why you no review? we like to get reviews for our work & we put time in. so why can you not click the button and say a couple of words BUT YOU CAN ALERT OR FAV!
Ashmoo2000 : general grumble to authors
...sometimes creative license should be revoked...
Peppermintyrose : grumble on behalf of gran
Fanfic turned Gran into a bit of an ogre - who just disapproves of Sookie, rather than loves her.
JelloDVDs : Grumble on behalf of Jason
When women get raped by one person it traumatizes them but when he get mass raped they don't give him any trauma. That always confused me.
Vikt0ria : Retorts to the characters:
"Eric… you are just delicious you keep being you, you big Viking." she says. Eric smiles and Sookie slaps him in the arm.
"Pammy… I would Sooooo go lesbo… and shoe shopping with you." she says seductively with a wink and Pam's fangs click down.
"Bill… how is it that you are just the bane of every ones existence… fictional or real? I bet if you got your mouth off of AB's sack people would stop figuring out ways to kill you." she says to Bill. Bill's lips tremble, then he ducks his head to hide his shame.
"Lorena… of course Bill is mentally unstable, you raised him." she says rolling her eyes and mumbles "Psycho."
"Jason… sweetie Dawn was right you are dumber than a box of hair." She says looking at Jason in mock pity.
"Hey" Jason replied outraged
"But since you are so damn hot you are forgiven." She says and he brightens.
"Jessica… the smartest thing that you did was to get rid of Hoyt for him." she says nodding at Jason. "You two are perfect for each other… maybe you can smarten each other up?" she says.
She looks at everyone else to see who she's missed.
"Ms. Harris I absolutely love you… I hope you don't mind the liberties we take with your characters…" she glares at AB "At least some of ours aren't as crazy as his." he jerks her head in AB's direction.
"Laffy honey… you… you… I love you I do… you go girl and all that jazz..." She says snapping her fingers and Laffy snaps along "but dress better, and use better colours for your make up." She finishes.
"Hmph. Bitch!" Laffy says turning his body in his chair while crossing his legs and fan himself stopping momentarily to shoot daggers at Viktoria.
Ali989969 : grumbles to the authors
Making Arlene and Sookie besties... The fake red head was a user from the start and Sookie would never start a business, etc with her.
Killing off Alcide after Sookie marries him... I get that she needs to be available for Eric, but Alc (was) a decent guy and doesn't deserve being killed off.
On the flip side of that, A/H pairing of Alc Tray, or Bill and Eric as besties. Seriously? They hate each other. Humanizing them wouldn't make clashing personalities suddenly mesh.
Jessica as ERIC' S daughter...really?
vicky199416 : Grumble to the authors
dear fanfic authors
please keep the characters in character. We all know Eric isn't this vampire bunny slipper wearing person who only loves Sookie and wouldn't hurt a fly, so don't write it.
A/N : It's so weird to put this on the 'completed' list...WOW! Thanks so much to everyone who read, reviewed and contributed!
Vitzy : Threat to the authors
Y'all better review or I'll never post the group grumbles...LOL!
Until next time...