Disclaimer: I do not own our favorite agents, the show would definitely have to broadcast from HBO or CinaMax if I did….possibly after 1am *snicker*
And Partner Persuasions.
Olivia woke slowly.
Her head pounded in time with each heartbeat, and her tongue felt thick and dry. Her throat ached like she'd been screaming at a concert or football game and every joint in her body felt liquid and loose—stretched and disjointed—like she'd been pulled apart at the seams and laced back together again with too much thread.
Struggling to raise her eyelids, Olivia winced at the overly bright room, she didn't remember falling asleep with the lights on….Olivia was having trouble remembering exactly how she'd gone to sleep at all.
Blinking to try and find some definition to the white blur she found herself in something in Olivia's brain finally snapped to attention.
Bolting up from the mattress Olivia took in the white room in panic….White floors…white walls…white door…white sheets.
OhGodNo. The blood rushed in her ears. The edges of her vision hazed with red and black the clarity of the room's furniture and features swimming before her eyes.
When Olivia felt arms wrap around her body she flailed and screamed.
Peter woke with a start.
There was a wild animal in his room. Peter bolted upright intent on finding out where it was, and how to get it out of the house before Walter found it and tried to catch it himself…or God forbid attempted to contain it so he could keep it as a pet.
Peter ascertained quite quickly after sitting up several disturbing things.
One being that He was naked…Peter never slept naked…Walter slept naked…Walter made breakfast naked…and did jumping jacks naked…a truly frightful sight in the wee hours.
Two that Peter was not in his room….he was in a white room he did not immediately recognize.
Peter's brain feeling particularly thick and sluggish at the moment refused to offer up an explanation for his current location…his mouth and throat felt like he'd been chugging hard liquor though Peter couldn't remember drinking anything.
And Third, and most importantly, Peter discovered the keening screech that had awoken him so suddenly was not as it turned out an animal at all….it was Olivia.
Rocking back and forth beside him on the bed, her hands fisted in her hair, Huge tears running down her face. As Peter brought his focus to bear on her he realized that she was actually formulating words, though she was so distraught it was difficult to catch them all.
"No more tests, please, let me go, ohgodplease, let me out of here! I don't belong here I have to go home!"
Peter unable to stand the sight of Olivia in such pain did the only thing he could think of in his bewildered state. He wrapped his arms around her and held on tight when she started thrashing against him, intent it seemed to fight him off as if he were going to hurt her.
Slowly Olivia became aware that the person holding her was not trying to drag her out the door…and had yet to stick her with needles or strap her down to anything. Instead the person was murmuring soothing words to her and rocking her gently back and forth. As the haze in her brain slowly receded Olivia was able to concentrate on what was being said and realized it was Peter.
Peter; she was hallucinating Peter again.
Was she still trapped then on the other side?
Had she never actually escaped?
Olivia struggled to turn in his arms, after a few moments he loosened his hold allowing her to twist and face him. Olivia brought her hands up to his face.
"Are you real? Please tell me I'm not dreaming this."
He shook his head. "I was going to ask you the same thing."
Olivia's breath left her in a rush. Never once had her hallucination Peter insisted that he was real; he had only told her over and over that she didn't belong where she was.
Olivia let her body relax against Peter's chest, melting into him the fingers on one hand curled around his arm as the other came up to rest by her chin, unable to stop her eyes from darting around the room once more.
Taking it all in.
It was like a nightmare come back to torture her in her waking hours.
Too many nights since Olivia's return she'd woken screaming, sheets soaked with sweat certain that when she opened her eyes she'd be still locked in that room. Certain that guards would be storming through her bedroom door ready to drag her out and stick her with needles and tubes and wires; that they would cut her and inhumanely write their notes while she cried and screamed. Begging and pleading for mercy to deaf ears.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Peter's arms were around her again, holding her close to his chest, his chin rested on her hair. Olivia could feel his heartbeat under her ear, she closed her eyes and listened to its steady thrum.
She could smell this close to his skin the definite scent of Peter, and some kind of soap…not the usual Peter soap…something different.
Government issue soap Olivia remembered suddenly.
Olivia felt herself relax further.
Peter was here with her, she was not trapped on the other side still, no one was coming to hurt her and experiment on her…no one was going to cut out her organs or her brain.
Olivia's heart stuttered as she remembered what else had happened since they had arrived at the CDC.
"Olivia?" Peter's voice was gentle. "What happened on the other side? My father…did he hurt you?"
Olivia felt her head nod against his chest unable to form the words.
"Please tell me Olivia, if you can…I need to know…"
Olivia squeezed her eyes shut blocking out the white wall and nightstand. This may not be the room on the other side, but the glaring white everywhere she looked was making her heart race.
"They locked me up."
Peter's fingers smoothed down her back trying to soothe her, trying to reassure her with his presence. He held her close hoping to communicate through his touch his unwavering support-she could tell him anything; he was real, he was here with her and he was not going anywhere without her.
"They left me in this white room forever…it felt like months or years…no one spoke to me, or brought me food…there was no clock or window, no way to tell day from night or hours from minutes…I just laid there thinking about how I had to get away, how I had to escape, how someone would come for me…realize I was missing...but no one came."
Peter tightened his hold on her. Pressing a kiss to the top of her head it was all he could do to comfort her in the aftermath.
He hadn't come for her. He hadn't realized she was missing.
He was a fool.
"Then they started showing up at random, dragging me down the hallway to these different rooms. They'd strap me down, inject me with drugs or chemicals. It made me feel awful, I kept asking them to let me go, asking what they were trying to do. But no one would speak to me or look at me…It was like I didn't exist, I wasn't human…I was a lab rat…"
"They were experimenting on you?" Peter felt the anger rolling off him in waves. He hoped he wasn't shaking; he needed to comfort her right now; help her to process the trauma she'd lived through.
He could Punch holes in the walls and screaming obscenities at his absent father later.
"Eventually one of them told me what they were doing…They were injecting me somehow with her memories…the…" She stumbled over the name "the…other Olivia Dunham's persona…they were trying to turn me into her…use me on their side to find out what I could do…to learn how we crossed over to get you back."
Peter felt his breath leave him in a rush, hearing this; what they had done to her while he was unaware—when he had unknowingly abandoned her on the other side was like a punch to the gut. It was the same stomach-sick feeling he'd first encountered when he'd realized the truth.
"It wasn't working though and the injections were getting worse and worse. They kept mentioning that each time they might kill me. I had to get away. I managed to escape…I made it out of the building…I had to swim from Elis Island to the shore…I was so tired..so weak…I thought I was going to drown…but I had to get free, I knew they were going to kill me it was only a matter of time and anything would be better then what they were doing to me…I made it finally and I tried to find someone who could help me. Someone who might believe me…But while I was running away from them…things started to get confusing…and somehow the injections they were giving me…they started to take effect…I couldn't remember what was real and what wasn't…I started to believe it. They had my own mother tell me that I was her…my mother is dead…but there she was…hugging me and telling me that I was confused."
Peter felt her tears hit his chest. "I thought I was her. I thought my whole life, my real life had been a hallucination…a result of some traumatic event they wouldn't tell me about…I forgot about Rachel and Ella and Walter and Astrid and You….God I forgot about you." Her fingers tightened around his bicep like she was afraid he would disappear again. That if she let go he would slip away into some figment of her imagination.
"But then I saw you…God I saw you everywhere…I didn't tell them…I thought I was losing my mind, I didn't want them to know…I was afraid that they would do something to me...though I didn't know what. I knew you….but I didn't…everything was all wrong. I had conversations with you in my head…I thought I was going insane I tried to ignore you but you wouldn't go away…you kept telling me things…facts that I couldn't know…that I shouldn't know if I were truly their Olivia. And it all became Chaos again…I didn't know what was real or who to believe…And then your Father came to me at Fringe."
Peter stiffened. What the hell else could that bastard have done to her? Wasn't it bad enough already?
"He wanted to try some experiments, with my permission he said…but I knew, I knew he didn't really mean that…I had to play along…and when they started trying to get me to cross over to the other side I thought maybe I could cross over and not come back…I could get away, come back to you…but it wasn't working…I couldn't stay I kept getting pulled back to the other side no matter how hard I tried to hold onto it."
"When they realized that I knew who I was again." She paused taking a deep breath. "They put me back in that white room, and they came to get me…Your father's scientist on the other side…he was going to cut me into pieces…he wanted to study my organs and my brain…I was laying there awake…strapped down and they were going to cut me open and pull me apart and that's when Broyles stopped them…" She was sobbing again.
"He helped you escape." The next time Peter saw the man…even if it was his double he was going to kiss him.
Olivia nodded. "He helped me escape, got me back to Walter's original lab on the other side…he helped me come back across…and they killed him for it. It's my fault he's dead…he had a wife…and a son…and they're alone because of me." Olivia dissolved into tears, her breath coming in tightly hitched sobs eyes squeezed tight against the memories the images as vivid as if they had happened yesterday.
Peter held her while she cried wrapping his arms as tightly around her body as he could, holding her to him, trying to hold together the fragile beautiful woman he loved while she battled her grief and pain.
Peter could never have imagined even in his worst nightmares the extent of suffering and torture she had lived through. That she had survived and was able to function on any level let alone to the extent that she was able to return to work, and try to patch up the friendship they had shared was a miracle.
That she could look at Walter who looked so much like the man that had ordered her murder without breaking down into hysterical fits was amazing.
He marveled at how she had been holding all of this inside. The pain she had endured while on the other side, added to the stress and emotional turmoil that had consumed them both with the nightmare he'd unwittingly created for both of them upon her return; but none of it had destroyed her.
She'd taken it all in; she'd adapted and grown stronger; she was stronger than anyone Peter had ever known.
She had survived it all…but it was taking its toll on her slowly, it was taking its toll on them. Now that he knew the truth he wouldn't let her bear it alone, he wouldn't leave her again.
Peter held her tight, until the crying stopped, and her breathing slowed to a normal rhythm.
Until her body relaxed against his frame and her fingers loosened their death grip on his arm, Olivia had drifted off to sleep again and so did Peter for a while.
More to come, Promise! And that chapter will be much smuttier! :)