A/N: This is what happens when two friends who are really hyper after watching Vampires Suck get together and start visualizing what happens when two worlds then three, then so on and so forth collide.

This is a MAJOR CROSSOVER FIC and is done purely for entertaining purposes. Myself and SerianatheNymph are collaborating on this fic so updates will be sporadic.

Warning: This is a humor fic but will have hints of romance and bella bashing as well as killing said annoyance. It will also feature as the main plot putting people where they don't belong so expect to see Taylor Lautner in the world of Ouran High School Host Club as a host. I'll let the fangirls drool over the image now.


Chapter 1:

The Get Together


Seriana: "I think it would be funny to bring in Twilight and Vampires Suck and have them meet."

Katarina: "I think we should do a fic where we join the worlds and kill bella and have becca fall in love with the real Edward."

Seriana: "Then what happens to EdWard?"

Katarina: "We could bring in ourselves and have us conveniently know where the cullens live and be like "Hey we just wanted to let you know that bella is dead." Then Edward could look at us and ask "How did she die" this fic would take place before Eclipse so Jacob has just phased. We reply that "I had a letter to give to bella from her father saying that her mother was in critical condition and the plane that bella got on hadn't been serviced so it went down then exploded." Then I lean over and whisper to you that "it wasn't serviced right?""

Seriana: "then I say "no it wasn't there was a bomb on board remember? Because we put it there?""

Katarina: turns on the computer "stupid computer!" hits computer it beeps and we get sucked into the Twilight world to the field where the cullens play baseball and they are standing there. "Uh hi?" looks at Seriana "what is going on!"

Seriana: "I don't know but I'm ADD and I have MAGIC MARKERS!" she yells holding up a stack of magic markers that she had in her pocket. The Duh duh duh duh from when link gets an item sounds out. The cullens stare at us. "Where did that noise come from?" she asks.

Katarina: Shrugs "Uh what do the markers do?" I take the green marker.

Seriana: "THIS!" Takes the black marker and draws a moustache on Rosalie.

Katarina: o0 "That. Was. AWESOME!" Walks over to an annoyed Rosalie and looks at Emmett "Hey he's a giant teddy bear!" Alice giggles, I take the marker and write Brother bear on Emmetts forehead. "Hey Seriana?"

Seriana: "Ya, what?" she stops drawing Doc Brown on Carlisle's forehead. So it's just DOC.

Katarina: "Can these markers open portals to other dimensions where there are spoof characters of you know who?"

Seriana: "You want to open a portal to a dimension that has a spoof character of Voldemort?" she asks confused.

Katarina: Face palms. "No of the characters that are standing in front of us wondering why we are speaking Japanese and WRITING ON THEIR FOREHEADS!"

Seriana: "Oh…Hey that reminds me!" Turns around and finishes writing BROWN on Carlisles forehead. A minute later he changes into Doc Brown. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" She runs over and hides behind me. "Creepy old guy." She says pointing to Carlisle/Doc Brown who is very confused.

Katarina: … "Seriana."

Seriana: "Yes?"

Katarina: "You do know that Carlisle is old…and he's a vampire?" I say returning to English.

Seriana: "your right that is creepy."

Carlisle: "Hey I'm not that old…"

Katarina: *_* "Your over 359 yrs old…that's old." Turns to Seriana "Hey you never told me how to open that portal?

Seriana: Runs over and erases Doc Brown off of Carlisles forehead. "You have to use two colors." She tosses the black marker to me.

Katarina: Catches the marker. "OH MAGIC MARKER! OPEN A PORTAL TO SPORKS!" I say holding up the markers.

Seriana: *_* "Uh Katarina?"

Katarina: "Ya?"

Seriana: "you don't have to say that…you just draw the portal and imagine sporks and EdWards pasty butt!" She and I laugh.

Katarina: Lowers markers. "Oh ok." Draws a portal mumbling how some people just don't know how to take a joke.

Seriana: "I heard that"

Katarina: "no you didn't"

Seriana: looks disappointed "your right"

Katarina: draws portal above her and the sullens, the sporks pack, and becca fall though and EdWard has his pants around his ankles.

Seriana: "hey I said imagine his pasty butt not bring it here for the cullens to look at! He's supposed to be dressed!" Draws a business suit on herself.

"This is a public service announcement: This fic is now rated T maybe M for EdWard's pasty butt.

Because we all like our sanity the way it is. Thank you and CONTINUE READING! OR I'LL HUNT YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU LIKE A PISH!

Thank you and have a nice day!" lights disappear.

Katarina:*_* "Seriana…who are you talking to?"

Seriana: "I. don't know. BUT! I'm ADD, I am in a business suit, I have MAGIC MARKERS!" Duh duh duh duh! "AND NOW…"Draws Starbucks. "I HAS CAFFENE! Want some?"

Katarina: "Uh…Edward this is EdWard, Iris, this is Alice, Rosalie this is Rosalyne, Eden this is Esme, Carlisle this is Carlin, Emmett meet Alex, Jerimiah meet Jasper, and everyone meet Becca." Pushes becca towards Edward. "Have fun. I have to go find JACOB!" Points in random direction that suddenly Jacob runs out from. Looks at finger. "I has magic? AWESOME! EdWard has pants!" points at EdWards pasty butt without looking. Pants appear, disco ball disappears. Jacob runs over. "Who are you?" he asks me. "Mwah? I is your soul mate!" says completely hyper. All of a sudden Jacob imprints on me. "Oops I shouldn't have been pointing at myself! Now I have two imprintees." Points to Jacob White.

Seriana: "Katarina! What did you dooooooooooooooooooooooo….." continues sounding like a police siren while drawing separate boxes to put the sporks pack in.

Katarina: "Seriana…why are you doing that? We are supposed to be bringing in the other manly men from all those places we talked about remember?"

Seriana: Looks at EdWard, then back at me. "I Choose you JARETH!" portal opens and Jareth lands on Hoggle.

Katarina:"…HEY LOOK ITS HEGWART no hogwart, no wait Hogwarts is a school…speaking of Hogwarts I SUMON DRACO!" Draco falls on Jareth who just got up.

Seriana: "Hey look it's a mound of blonde hair" Draws 'mound of blonde hair' in front of Jareth.

Katarina: "Speaking of mound. I summon Sharkboy because I want to see some reaction!" Sharkboy falls and lands on his feet on Draco's back.

The cullens look at Sharkboy. "Is that Jacob?" Edward asks confused.

Seriana: "Yes he was a shark in another life. An Actor in the life before that, and now he's a werewolf. Speaking of actor. I summon the final version of Jacob and therefore the final person for our four way mirror: Taylor Lautner!" an imaginary audience starts clapping.

Katarina: Looks for audience. "Uh okay." Sighs as I see Taylor about to fall on Sharkboy. "We really need to move that portal." I grab the portal and move it so that he can walk out. He walks out upside down and falls on his back, but because he is a masta at martial arts he avoids falling and lands in front of me on his feet. "Hey now we have all the Jacobs!" Splits from herself and creates Ali for Jacob 1 and 2, Naria for Draco, and Hecate for Taylor. "Man I'm lightheaded. Seriana? Are you going to split and, wait Secota is with Jareth right?"

Seriana: "Well I'm gonna split myself later and...CEDRIC!" Cedric falls out of the sky. "Hey I didn't call him…oh well." Glomps Cedric. "HES ALIVE! Hey cedric this is your…less attractive half as a vampire…LORD MOLDY BUTT!" she says pointing to EdWard. "And he's….well ya he's you as well." She points to Edward. Who looks confused.

Katarina: "Well now we must make them all go away until we can think of something to do with them…wait I didn't split for sharky. Anna!" a shadow appears next to me and takes form, forming a girl with long black hair and a suit much like a ninja's. "Okay now everyone back to your worlds…with our OC's until we can figure out what to do with them…Seriana split to kara and we can send them back."

Seriana: "K." splits from herself creating a girl with silver hair and blue eyes. "Kara. Keep an eye on Cedric and here's a gun. Go shoot Voldy put an end to this foolishness and show everyone that guns are AWESOME! And that wands are useless when it comes to killing."

Random narrator from James and the giant peach: and so all the portals appeared taking the characters who were still very confused away and leaving the two crazy authoresses in a blank completely white world. Unfortunately, what they do not yet know is that Taylor and Hecate got transported to the Ouran High School Host Club world where Hacate would have fun torturing Tamaki. Jareth and Secota get taken to the world of Howl's moving castle where Howl will bug Jareth for his hair secrets and much to his annoyance Draco and Naria are transported there as well. Sharkboy and Anna get transported to Taylor Launer's world onto the set of Eclipse where everyone is convinced that he has gone crazy which sends dear sharky into a shark frenzy. Cedric and Kara get transported to the LOTR world where Kara summons Katarina's oc named Enelya Elensar who is already in the world, and Kara is then pulled aside and Enelya tell her not to ruin anything with her knowledge. And Jacob (they have mashed the two Jacobs together) and Ali are sent to the world of NARUTO! Where everyone thinks they are demons. Sadly all the other characters who were mentioned in this chapter namely the twilight and Vampires suck cast, are put in a box until further notice.

Katarina: "Hey Seriana? Did you hear that voice? He's telling everyone our secrets! NO MORE SPOILERS! Please!"

Seriana: "I thought I got rid of that voice with the medicine! noooooooooooooo! " trails off with siren noise.

Katarina: "Wait. I didn't even think of that...Seriana did we send them to the right worlds!"


A/N: Yes we know we are crazy but we had lots of sugar and we needed an outlet. That and we were bored. If you are not ROTFLOL you do not have a sense of humor and you will not be allowed to read any further or I will sick Seriana and myself on your compooper…I was just kidding NO FLAMES! They will be used to kill bella and make smores! Bella is dead in this fic and bella fans were warned in the summary of this fic so don't complain. If you do we will we will sic Hitsugaya and Gaara and Seriana's cat on you! R&R