This is who we are (and who we aren't).
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
A little ditty I found on my hard-drive. I was going to delete this, but re-read it.
It's not even half so bad, I thought, so I fleshed it out a bit and posted now? I just wanted to write something for this couple. Just once. Because I probably won't ever again, seeing how Code Geass claimed my soul.
Anyhow, feedback is love?
Kyouya is a man of facts and figures. Yet, sometimes, he dreams.
In his dreams, it's always about Tamaki – the same bright Tamaki he sees in the daytime and yet not quite the same.
Because, in his dreams, Tamaki isn't smiling at his clients, but his smile is for Kyouya and Kyouya only. It's the sort of smile that makes you realise that you belong to that one person (his and his only – one heart, one soul bleeding into each other).
Oh no, Kyouya knows that, in some sense, he does belong to Tamaki already because, otherwise, he wouldn't be doing what he's doing (wouldn't play shadow king to the not so brilliant emperor).
And yet, he's not Tamaki's because you can't belong to someone who belongs to everyone else. And Tamaki, he -
(belongs to everyone - and no one.)
Because when he smiles, it's the same smile for everyone – just in slight variations.
For his clients: a warm, charming smile that is full of promises and, in fact, empty (because princes have long since died out and there's no such thing as a damsel in distress - the dragon is just an imaginary thing in your head).
For his friends: the slightly dorky smile that is foolish and naïve and empty still (because, deep down, Tamaki is hurting, though he probably never realises just how much).
For Kyouya: a happy, happy smile that lights up his soul and makes his knee goes weak, but empty still (because he doesn't know how much Kyouya really wants him).
In his dreams:
Tamaki will creep up to him, wrap his arms around Kyouya's neck and whisper – his voice, seductive and low – something in French, something so silly that Kyouya rolls his eyes and yet smiles a little because -
It's only for him. And because it's only for him, he'll turn around and kiss Tamaki, claim those lips as his own and – once that stupid idiot is too flushed and aroused to even fidget around properly – Kyouya will take him by his wrist, lead him to bed, push him down and then proceed to love him - claiming him, possessing him.
His body, his soul, and his heart.
Tamaki will wrap his arms around Kyouya's neck, screaming something about stupid twins into his ear and then proceed to shake him and beg him to do something about it.
Because that's what mothers should do.
And Kyouya (not because he's a mother, but because he loves Tamaki) will gently push Tamaki's hands away, stand up and – through some clever 'scare them into submission' tactic – make the twins do his bidding.
Tamaki will smile and hug him, calling Kyouya his 'bestest friend'.
But his soul, his heart and his body have not been claimed or possessed by Kyouya.
(- and is this what you call a tragedy - or is it just a farcical tragedy?)
Kyouya is a man of facts and figures. He knows that dreams are not reality. He knows that nothing will come out of pining or chasing after silly illusions.
And yet -
(he wishes that some dreams would come true).