Characters: Established Kurt/Blaine, Puck, Finn, other mentions.
Spoilers (if any): None.
Warnings (if any): Mentions of past sexual experiences, a bit of a dub-con kiss, language, bullying.
Word Count: 3445
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.
Summary: Blaine transfers, and he soon discovers Kurt's aversion to PDA when in the halls of McKinley. When he tries to loosen Kurt up and help him overcome his fears, everything explodes in his face.
A/N: This was supposed to be a drabble, but I'm incapable of writing drabbles. So this happened.
When they're at school, the only time Kurt will even touch Blaine is in the choir room.
With the doors closed and the rest of New Directions around them, Kurt doesn't hesitate to grab his hand and dance across the floor like the other couples do. He doesn't hold back when they perform their assignment for the rest of their teammates; a sweet duet that ends with a quick peck and a hand squeeze. No one judges them for who they are, and Blaine figures it's because they're all just glad to see Kurt happy for a change. Rachel beaming at them every chance she gets and the little smiles Finn is always exchanging with Kurt when Blaine is around tell him that much.
But things aren't the same outside of the choir room. Blaine doesn't get it – Kurt was perfectly fine breaking Dalton's PDA rules (which were strictly enforced by hall monitors), but he can't even hold Blaine's hand at McKinley. And their PDA rules are pretty much nonexistent, Blaine imagines. He's pretty sure students have sex in the bathrooms.
Blaine does understand that Kurt is afraid of being harassed, though. And Blaine so desperately wants to assure him that they're less likely to be bullied as a couple. He doesn't necessarily know if that's true, but it sounds probable. The chances of anyone shoving Kurt while someone is at his side, holding his hand, are pretty slim. Right? He's not a target anymore – he has someone.
But Blaine is never really sure, and ends up just deciding that what they're doing is probably for the best. It's not that he's big on PDA or anything, but sometimes he just wants to wrap an arm around Kurt's waist or give him a kiss on the cheek before class. He doesn't want to make out with him or anything like that. But since Kurt doesn't allow even the slightest display of love or fondness show during school hours, they make up for it after classes when Kurt is pressed between Blaine and his mattress. When he's all his and begging and whimpering and moving so beautifully.
Blaine has finally had enough after Kurt gives a rather sexually charged performance of "For Your Entertainment" during glee club later on in the week. Blaine's interest must have been clear on his face, because Santana is wiggling her eyebrows at him suggestively, Quinn is giving him a disgusted look and Artie lets out a low whistle, glancing over his shoulder at Blaine. Yeah, it is a little hard to keep the details of their love life a secret when Finn has walked in on them half naked at least twice.
Kurt laughs breathlessly, face flushed as he unwinds. He's heading for his chair next to Blaine (who has already pulled it a little closer) when the bell rings and everyone shuffles to their feet.
And Blaine is pissed. Because usually they have some extra time to hold hands and steal kisses during another member's performance. Why did Kurt have to go last today?
"That was amazing," Blaine exclaims as he springs out of his chair, holding the strap of Kurt's backpack out to him. Kurt shoulders his bag and smiles as Blaine leans in and presses a kiss against his lips. "Amazing."
"Thanks," Kurt responds, blushing and kissing him back chastely. They walk out of the choir room together, shoulders brushing before Kurt puts some more distance between them.
"So are you still trying to decide on your solo for tomorrow?" Kurt asks as they approach his geometry classroom.
"Yes," Blaine answers, stopping in front of Kurt and smiling. "Want to come over after classes and help me pick?" It's a stupid question, because they're always together after school. But Kurt just shrugs apathetically.
"Sure," he agrees. "I'll meet you by the car like usual, okay? I – …what are you doing?"
Blaine is clasping Kurt's hand in his, running his thumb over the knuckles. Kurt jerks away and scans his surroundings.
"Blaine. Not here."
"I can't help it," Blaine purrs, leaning in closer. "You did such an incredible job today. So hot."
Kurt flushes and tries to duck away, pushing at Blaine's chest. "Stop it. I'm serious."
"Why can't you just kiss me?" Blaine finally snaps, causing Kurt to do a double take and pull even further away from him. "I'm your boyfriend. You can't just give me a kiss in the hallway?"
He points at Tina and Mike. They're standing about a dozen lockers down, sharing brief kisses and bumping noses. "Why can't we do that?"
Kurt looks completely appalled and Blaine's on the verge of feeling incredibly guilty for even bringing it up. He feels even worse for raising his voice. But he can't exactly stop now.
"I don't care what people think of us," Blaine tries to reason desperately when Kurt doesn't speak.
At this point, they're gaining a lot of attention from passing students. Kurt moves in closer, voice low.
"Blaine. Karofsky and everyone in glee club … they're the only people in this school who know you're gay. Puck, Finn and Coach Sylvester are the only reasons I'm not getting thrown against lockers now. You should be happy that no one can tell." His voice cracks. "Trust me. You're lucky."
Blaine is just frustrated now. He knows where Kurt is coming from. He really does. But he also doesn't care if McKinley knows he's gay. Besides, no one really harasses Kurt anymore. On his first day back, a boy in a letterman jacket had bumped into him with a "welcome back, fag." Blaine had planned an entire five minute speech for this moment. He was beyond pissed, but at the same time he was thrilled to have the chance to stand up for his boyfriend. But before he could even get a word out, Puck had the boy on the floor with a knee pressed into his back. He sent him away with a black eye and a bloodied lip as "a warning." Blaine had never seen anything so amazing in his life. Puck's friendly shoulder punches had Blaine nearly doubling over, so he didn't want to imagine what a real hit felt like.
There are other factors aside from Puck's fists. Karofsky isn't leading the charge anymore. Whatever his reasons are, Blaine doesn't care. At least Kurt's safe.
And since Kurt is safe, Blaine automatically feels safe too. There's no need for them to hide their relationship like this. And he hates that Kurt thinks they should. More than anything, he wants Kurt to be happy and confident and sure.
"Baby, please," Blaine whispers, placing both hands on either side of Kurt's face. Now other students are actually slowing down to watch.
"Can we talk about this later?" Kurt begs, eyes pleading and hands shaking as he presses his palms flat against Blaine's chest.
It's not an unreasonable request. And Blaine is actually considering it. But his heart acts before his brain and his lips are on Kurt's.
He hears a few murmurs and surprised gasps before Kurt shoves him away with a "get off!" The look he gives Blaine before turning sharply on his heel and storming down the hall is a mix of anger, disbelief and pain.
After that, it takes about five seconds for Blaine's guilt to settle in. And another twenty seconds before the fear hits. Because all eyes are on him now, and the whispering has already started.
Kurt. I'm waiting by the car. -Blaine
I'm so sorry. -Blaine
Kurt, please? -Blaine
The texts are sent within minutes of each other. Blaine is leaning against his Jeep, clutching his phone in one hand and scanning the parking lot for his boyfriend. Kurt hasn't emerged from the school yet, and Blaine is way too afraid to call him.
His phone vibrates.
I'm riding home with Finn.
Blaine's stomach clenches. The first thing he notices is that Kurt doesn't sign the text with an "x," symbolizing a kiss. It's something silly he only does with their texts, so its absence is jarring.
He types out about five different replies before just deciding on a quick "Okay."
The drive home is quiet. Usually, Kurt's in the passenger seat and they're singing along with his iPod. Right now, they'd be making silly faces at each other before bursting into a fit of laughter. He remembers one time, about a month ago, Kurt was giving him an overdramatic rendition of a Mika song. It had been a riot – because Kurt's facial expressions were always hilarious – but it had also been incredibly hot. Because, wow. Those were really high notes.
Blaine couldn't even wait to get home. He had pulled his car into a deserted parking lot, put it in park, and pounced.
"Can you make those sounds for me now?" He had growled, unbuckling Kurt's seatbelt and grabbing the lever on the side of the seat so he could push it back. Until then all of their sexual encounters had been slow and intimate, in the privacy of one of their rooms, and in a warm bed. What had possessed him to give Kurt a blowjob in his car in broad daylight … he still wasn't sure. He didn't think he could completely blame the Mika song. But ever since then, keeping his hands to himself during school had been a trying task.
When he gets home, completing his homework is impossible. He logs onto Facebook every ten minutes and checks Kurt's profile. They're not Facebook junkies and they're only friends with people who matter, so Blaine figures that's why Kurt has never expressed concern over McKinley students seeing their relationship status. He's relieved to find that nothing has changed. His profile picture is still the two of them sitting in a Breadstix booth across from the photographer. Kurt is looking at the camera and smiling and Blaine is looking at Kurt and laughing. Blaine obsessively refreshes the page a few times. Nothing changes.
He realizes he's being stupid and slams his laptop shut. Kurt wouldn't break up with him without talking it over – they've been through too much already. They lost their virginity together, for Christ's sake. That had been an emotional roller coaster for both of them. Kurt's not going to just let him go.
He manages to finish his French homework, but when he gets around to his history textbook he just ends up reading the first paragraph of the chapter over and over again. This is getting ridiculous. He wants Kurt here to climb into his lap, kiss away his worry, unbutton his cardigan. He wants their study sessions to turn into make out sessions. He wants that petrifying moment when they have to pull away from each other like two opposing magnets the second he hears his mother open the front door.
Wow. He's pathetic. One evening without Kurt, and he's this wounded and upset. He tries to convince himself it would be different if they weren't currently in a fight, but he's not sure. This desperate need for Kurt is terrifying.
He falls onto his bed, grabbing his phone off the bedside table and pounding out a text.
I miss you. -Blaine
He sets his phone down again and goes downstairs to grab a snack. When he returns to his room, he snatches his phone up again and stares at the screen. He has no new messages. He stubbornly types out a new one, his heart pounding.
Please don't break up with me. -Blaine
The reply is almost immediate.
Blaine no longer feels like he's about to throw up everything he just ate, but his stomach is still churning nervously. He wants to drive to Kurt's house or give him a call or get on Skype or something. But his texts are frigid and brief, and he doesn't know if he can handle his actual voice.
When both his parents come home, they go out for a late dinner. His mother asks for the millionth time if he wants to transfer back to Dalton and his father, still expertly ignoring the fact his only child is gay, wonders if he's met any nice girls at McKinley. It's a long night – a night he would usually spend texting Kurt to keep his mind off things. But he suffers through it alone.
When he gets back home and crawls in bed, resting his cheek against the cool pillow, he sends out one last text.
I had the worst night ever. I know you're mad, but I just wanted to say I love you and I'm sorry. -Blaine
He sets his alarm and puts his phone under his pillow, not expecting Kurt to send anything back. He's in that blissful stage between awake and asleep when his phone vibrates. He sits up instantly and slips it out from beneath the pillow.
Love you, too. –K x
Blaine is more hurt than he is livid, but right now it's hard to tell the difference.
He had arrived at Kurt's house that morning, knocking on his front door and cheerily greeting Mr. Hummel when he answered.
"Hey, Blaine," Mr. Hummel had yawned, frowning at him slightly as he pushed the screen door open. He was clad in a flannel robe. It must have been his day off from the shop. "You need something?"
Blaine blinked and frowned back. "I'm here to pick up Kurt. Is he ready?"
Mr. Hummel – Blaine had to constantly remind himself he just preferred Burt – had raised his eyebrows. "Oh. He went to school with Finn this morning."
Blaine had fallen silent and Burt's eyes darkened.
"Is something going on with you guys?" he had questioned, eyeing Blaine suspiciously. "Because I was a little concerned when you two weren't together yesterday. Kurt just holed himself up in his room."
Blaine had made up some lame excuse that he knew Burt didn't believe before leaving and driving off to school alone.
As he heads towards Kurt's locker, he's trying to compose himself. And it's working, because he's tired of being upset and he just wants to make up. He's so focused on finding Kurt that he doesn't even register two hands grabbing his shoulders until he's slammed into a locker.
It knocks the breath out of him and he slides down onto the floor, gasping and squeezing his eyes shut. The deep laughter of several boys surrounds him.
"Where's Hummel?" someone sneers. He opens his eyes to find four boys in varsity hockey jackets standing in front of him, each holding a blue slushie.
"Didn't know you were a faggot, Anderson," a blonde one comments.
"Get away from me," Blaine whispers, trying to look past them. But the hall is nearly empty and the few students around them are doing a great job of ignoring what's going on.
"You hid it well until you decided to make out with him in front of the whole school," someone else says – a stockier guy with dark hair. "Does Hummel bend over and take it from you, then? Bet he's tight."
Blaine lets his head fall back against the locker. This isn't happening. He's usually good at handling these situations, but his back hurts and he's still trying to catch his breath and there are four of them.
"Do your nasty gay shit at home," the blonde one speaks up again, kicking the locker right next to Blaine and making him flinch. "No one wants to see it."
"And make sure you fuck him with your fingers first," someone else says, wriggling his own for emphasis. "Heard it hurts. Or is he all loosened up by now? Probably from getting it on with his brother, too."
Blaine can feel tears forming, but he refuses to let them spill over. Fighting back is just going to give them an excuse to actually beat him up.
When he doesn't respond, they get bored. The slushies are dumped over his head and the empty cups are thrown on the ground.
For a few minutes, he sits there shaking from the cold, the mortification and the anger. More students are beginning to filter in and take notice, so he finally jumps up and nearly slips in the process. But he manages to stay on his feet and make a run for it.
"…Blaine?" Finn's voice is unmistakable, but Blaine doesn't even remember passing him. He does, however, remember a large hand reaching out to try and stop him. But he brushes him away and pushes open the door to the bathroom.
Five minutes later he has most of his head in the sink, hands running feverishly through his curls as he tries to rinse out the sticky syrup. He hears the door hinges squeak and he looks up quickly to find Kurt standing next to him, a hand slapped over his mouth and his eyes wide.
And that's all it takes. Blaine is in tears now. Well, he was in tears before but for the wrong reasons – the syrup burns his eyes. Kurt immediately wraps his arms around Blaine, pulling him close and letting him bury his face in his shoulder as he sobs. Blaine is vaguely aware of the fact that Kurt doesn't mind he's staining his clothes with blue slushie, and that makes him love Kurt even more.
"I shouldn't have let you come in alone today," Kurt whispers, his own voice cracking as he runs a hand through Blaine's hair. "Oh God. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."
Blaine just shakes his head, wiping his face on Kurt's shoulder and kissing the spot under his ear. "It's okay. It's fine. I'm sorry, too."
The door is thrown open and Puck storms in, face flushed red and eyes wild. Finn follows after with towels.
"Who did it?" Puck demands as Blaine pulls away from Kurt and grabs a towel from Finn, wiping his face. Kurt gently pries it from his hands and starts carefully doing the work for him.
"I don't know," he answers, keeping his voice in check around the other two boys. He's pretty sure they realize he's been crying, regardless. "They were hockey players. One was blonde – "
"I got this," Puck says immediately, giving Blaine one of those painful shoulder pats before charging out of the bathroom. Finn drops the towels on the sink and follows.
Kurt silently wets a new towel and uses it to clean off the back of Blaine's neck. He then uses another towel to help dry his hair.
"There's not much I can do for your clothes," he says apologetically, passing a hand over Blaine's chest in an attempt to smooth out the ruined shirt. He then looks down at his own sweater. "But I do have a few extra outfits in my locker – I'm sure something will fit you. And we'll make a run to the dry cleaner's right after classes. Promise."
"Why didn't you want to ride with me to school today?" Blaine suddenly asks.
Kurt cringes. "I was still a little upset and Finn was being his annoying self and trying to take care of me. He didn't even know what we were fighting about, but he insisted on driving me. I think he thought we were going to, like, murder each other." He pauses, spent. "Blaine, this is exactly why I didn't want everyone to know you're my boyfriend."
Kurt cups Blaine's cheek in his palm and Blaine leans into his touch, letting his eyes shut.
"I know," he sighs. "But honestly?" He opens his eyes and looks back up at Kurt. "If anything, they made me want to show us off even more."
Kurt bites down on his bottom lip and presses his forehead against Blaine's, sighing. "I don't want to have to hide it anymore, either," he admits. "Yesterday, I thought a lot about what you said. But I'm not going to stand for you getting hurt."
Blaine takes Kurt's hands in his and tilts his chin up so he can plant a kiss on Kurt's lips. "I'm going to be fine. Besides, Puck and Finn won't let anything happen again. Looks like they've got my back, too."
Kurt smiles softly and returns the kiss. "They're making up for lost time," he says against Blaine's lips. "They've really changed since I first met them."
Blaine steps back, still clinging to Kurt's hands.
"One day we won't need them," he promises before pulling Kurt in again and kissing the tip of his nose.
And Blaine will patiently wait for that day. But until then, they won't be afraid.
When they leave the bathroom, they're still holding hands.