I'm sure you're confused right now...receiving a letter from me and all...but I couldn't tell you all this face to face.
What I'm trying to say is, I hate you... (WAIT! Finish this letter before you hex me!) I hate you for making me feel safe, loved, happy and whole.
Argh Granger...why is this so hard? There's so many things that I'd like to tell you but...you know what, let me start from the very beginning.
Remember when we first met in my compartment? You came in to ask me whether I've seen Longbottom's toad and I said I haven't. Then we started talking. It was nice to finally have someone INTELLIGENT to talk to (Blaise and I weren't close friends then but you're still smarter than him...shh! Don't tell him that!) Oh how I wished that you were sorted in Slytherin until I found out that you were a muggleborn. It got worse when you started beating me in class. But what bugged me the most was the fact that I thought you we're (and still are) the most beautiful girl I've ever seen...bushy hair and all.
That was the year when I started calling you mudblood. I wasn't proud of it but I was more worried about what my father would do to me if I DIDN'T treat you like scum.
When you were petrified, Merlin was I petrified myself! I know I said 'you'll be next blah blah blah' when the Chamber of Secrets opened but I didn't mean it! Just so you know, I checked on you every night in the Hospital Wing to make sure you were alright.
Three words...Me. Enough said. I was furious at that time...but more at myself than at you because I actually liked it when your hand touched my face (though I'm not saying that I want to be punched by you again!)
You had me worried again when I found out that you were underwater! Believe it or not, I was about to take my clothes off and dive into the water to save you but that Bulgarian Git...I mean Krum got to you first. I started to hate him there and then when I saw him holding you.
It happened again when I saw you coming down the stairs during the Yule Ball. Don't get me wrong, you are beautiful but when I saw you at the Yule Ball, Hermione, you looked like an angel! Then that stupid Krum took you by the arm and the monster in me came did I know then that that feeling was called jealousy.
Umbridge...that toad. My father told me to join her stupid squad and where did that get me? Hexed!
But after the incident at the ministry, my life changed. It was during Arithmacy and you were taking notes. I was staring at you (until Blaise told me to stop drooling. The Slytherins knew about my crush on you but they didn't dwell on it so that the Death Eaters won't come and attack me. The Slytherins were actually fighting for the Light side). ANYWAY, as I was staring at you, you accidently gave yourself a paper cut and that was when I realized that my whole life was a lie.
Your blood was red...like mine and everyone else. It wasn't brown or dirty. It was red.
I found out that everything that my parents had taught me and everything that I believed in all this while...was a lie.
You were and still are the smartest witch of all age. YOU figured out about my 'problem' and YOU were the one who persuaded (well, more like 'force') me to join the Order. It was the best decision of my life. Though I already had the dark mark, that decision managed to save my life. And it was all thanks to you.
I missed you a lot when you didn't come back. Theo and Pansy had to smack my head for pacing around the common room too much. (The new teachers were horrible and I don't mean to brag, but I was the one who told Longbottom to continue Dumbledore's Army. And I'm glad that he did)
Anyway, I was kind of glad to see that you, Potter and Weasel were still alive but I couldn't help feel angry at your stupidity. It pained me to see you tortured by my aunt and I guess my mother saw it too because she distracted my aunt, giving me some time to call Dobby (bless his soul) to help you and your friends escape.
That was the second best decision of my life!
And now let get to the last part shall we?
This letter was actually written a long time ago but I bring it with me wherever I go. If you're reading this letter, than it means the war has finally ended, I'm sitting with the other survivors and am now watching you as you read my letter that you have just received. And I bet you just looked up and saw me looking at you. STOP! Don't get up yet! I have a one more thing to tell you...
I Love you Hermione Jean Granger...I have since the first time I met you in my compartment and I still do. You changed my life for the better. All my life, I've always felt like a part of me was missing. I was right. I AM missing something. My heart which you have been holding on to all this while.
And it's okay if you don't feel the same way Hermione. Just remember that I'll be here for you no matter what.
Hermione smiled as she wiped her small tears. The letter got to her every time she read it even though she read it every night for the last 5 years.
She quietly opened the desk drawer and gently placed the letter inside to be read the following night.
Hermione Malfoy nee Granger got under the covers and snuggled close to her husband as she closed her eyes, her slender fingers gently stroking his blonde hair.
The last think that she thought of before she drifted off to sleep was about HIS letter that had started it all.