Song: Take Me Along by Miley Cyrus (not all of it, just some lines)
Summary: Darren reflects on him and Spook and Spook and HER.
The city of angels is lonely at night
Keep myself alight by candlelight
It's not as if you're not there. You're always there, perhaps that's part of the problem.
Every single day, seeing you so happy when I'm dying inside.
I know that my feelings for you will never go away. They used to be unlocked doors – ready to open and discover what's behind them. My love for you used to be something I could explore, new things to work out and enjoy.
Now it's a burden. One I'll never be rid of.
My love that I (still) feel for you is like a heavy rock chained to my ankle (or my heart).
Only you have the key.
So she can love you like I do.
There were always rumours about you and her, one that I used to smile quietly about and laugh on the inside because I knew they couldn't possibly be true.
She's pretty, I'll give you that, but is she really worth losing my love for?
Except you didn't lose my love.
You rejected it.
You didn't want it any more.
You didn't want me.
You wanted her.
It's not that I've got anything against her, I just don't think she's worthy of you.
Maybe I wasn't worthy of you.
Does she hold you when you cry? Does she laugh when you laugh? Does she cry for you? Would she do anything for you? Does she automatically smile whenever she hears your voice? Does she love you?
I held you when you cried (which wasn't very often). I laughed when you laughed. I cried for you. I would do anything for you. I smile (now on the inside) when I hear your voice.
I love you.
Can she love you like I do?
Is it possible for anyone to love you like I do?
Look me in the eyes and say it's true.
You're pinning all your hopes on the fact that she loves you at least half as much as I do.
Because that'll be enough for you. Because you think you don't need me.
You and her. Is it true love?
True love like (I thought) you and me were.
Can you tell me that she loves you?
Can she tell you that she loves you?
I ask myself is this love at all.
With you and me it was love.
Is it love with you and her?
Sure she gives you affection. Well, she is one of the most affectionate people I've ever met.
But you, more of a different type. She gives you affection as a sister would give a cute little brother affection. Almost as a mother would give her first son affection.
But you crave love.
Sweet, passionate love.
Ever since you left me you've craved love. My love.
When I need you most you let me fall.
You always were the better of us two at lying. You used to fend of the questions for me.
But I'm a rubbish liar even though I've managed to keep it a secret for so long.
Don't you know that it's impossible to lie to a mind reader? They found out that I'm into boys.
Though of course they'll never know about us, because you're straight, because you're going out with a girl.
I just fell into a dark pit and I can't get out.
I'm always here at the side of your stage
let you live your life.
Now I'm just down in the pit and I can't interfere with your performance. I have to let you act to your hearts content.
But I'm still there if you really need me. Always at the side of your spotlight.
I'm being good about this aren't I? I'm not begging for you back, or hating you for leaving me.
Sometimes you have to love someone enough to let them go. Seems like that's how much I love you. I love you enough to let you move on.
Pretend I'm okay.
You may not know this but I'm a good actor too. You're probably the only one who knows that my ever present smile is fake.
But you choose to ignore that. Desperately clinging on to the hope that you didn't just lose your first love, you got a better one as well.
I'm happy for you. I honestly am.
But I just realised; even the extras are expected to act. And I'm just an extra in your life.
Don't you know that this is wrong?
How is it that you can be so open about your relationship with her? Yet you were ashamed of anyone knowing about us. It's not fair.
Me and you were actually in love properly. But you and her aren't in love. You never were and you never will be.
You know that.
Maybe when you stop lying to yourself you'll realise that.
Maybe you'll come back to me.
Or maybe I'm seriously disillusioned.
I'll be okay.
Don't worry, I won't fall apart completely.
Coz I know that you'll need me when you do.
Real love lasts Spook.
You and Mia won't.
That was kinda depressing.
Let me know what you think.