Just So You Know: I really don't think I need to say this, but I DO NOT own the Doctor, Rose, the TARDIS, the concept, anything. It's kinda fun to say, however, so I said it. I also don't own jam. But alas, how I wish I did. Then, I could eat all the jam I desire=]

Also: This is pure silliness. Very fun to write, too, as I sat in Science class:)


Rose bit her bottom lip, a small scowl on her face, and peered, perplexed, around the center console room. "Umm, Doctor? Where've you gotten to?" To tell no less than the truth, she was beginning to panic. One moment he was here, tinkering with something on the console, and a few later he was nowhere to be seen, almost like a little kid. A clever, genius little kid, who could get into any sort of trouble imaginable. But as things were, where could he have gotten to when the TARDIS's engine was jammed and they were marooned on an island somewhere on Barcelona (the planet, not the city)? "Doctor?" she crooned once more.

While she was fruitlessly lifting up the seat cushions (no Doctor there), she heard a noise, which she quickly recognized as the Doctor's voice. "Eeh-ye-ahh… Down here!" His voice sounded distant and somewhat strained but still full of his normal exuberance and cheer.

Dropping to her hands and knees immediately, Rose pressed her ear to the floor panels. "Doctor?" She heard no reply at first, but went on as if she had. "Thank God, I thought I'd lost you! All I did was go for a bit of a swim in the library… and you'd gone." An entire minute or more passed in silence. The metal floor panel was starting to freeze Rose's cheek. He was ignoring her, and her reasonably-short temper flared for a second. She banged on the floor with a fist, a bit ticked off. "Are you even listening to me?"

"Yes, yes!" The Doctor assured her. "You went for a swim. Pool in the library, isn't it brilliant? You can READ and SWIM at the same time. Knowledge. That's what it is, Rose Tyler. I'm brilliant." A loud clanging followed. "Oh…ahh… didn't see that!"

Rose, lifting her head up, frowned slightly and shifted positions so she was sitting on her knees. "Are you alright down there?" She was beginning to come to the conclusion that he had gone completely mad.

Without warning, something thudded against the panel underneath her. She jumped up and away in surprise. The panel shifted to the left and up came the Doctor. He hoisted himself onto the main floor, allowing his legs to dangle in the hole the misplaced piece of floor created. In his hand, he held an sticky-looking jar of jam.

"Oh, yes! I'm quite clever, actually." The Doctor scraped a bit of jam off the side of the jar with his index finger and looked at it with reverence. His hair was touseled even more than the usual, there was a generous amount of dust and dirt on his favorite brown, pin-striped suit, and his eyes cased a wild sort fascination.

Rose rolled her eyes. "What did you do this time?"

The Doctor sucked the jam off of his finger. "Ooh, it's berry. Marionberry, in fact. Actually I would call that blackberry instead. Well really, if you think about it, it would be mixed berry because I can taste just a hint of raspberry." Rose stared at him incredulously as he sampled another finger-full of the sticky stuff. "More than a hint, maybe. Ok definitely more, maybe half of it is raspberry, or the majority. You know, I think I taste some strawberry too. A lot of it. No, never mind, just a bit. I think I've got it straight, it's…"

He never got to finish. "Doctor! You're rambling again." Rose interrupted sharply.

Smiling, the Doctor restarted. "Sorry, I got a bit carried away. Well maybe more than a bit… What I'm trying to say is I've found the cause of our…err… 'sticky situation'." He made awkward (he was still attempting to hold onto the jam jar) quotations in the air with his sticky fingers. "The engine was jammed, but I removed the jam, and the she's as good as new!"

Rose couldn't help but smiling, inside and out, at her Doctor. When he was around she couldn't be upset or cross. Not for long. "And we can make sandwiches!" She added happily.

The Doctor jumped to his feet, then grabbed Rose's hands and pulled her up after him, with maybe a little too much energy. She went hurtling forward, but the Doctor righted her before she fell. He held onto her hands and looked into her eyes. "Ahhh, I just love sandwiches! Especially the little kind with the toothpicky thingy in the top! Sandwiches on the go, Rose Tyler?"

She laughed and nodded. "I'll get the bread!"

The Doctor released one of her hands and spun her around a few times. "Alright, sounds like a plan. I'll land us somewhere brilliant… I know this one planet with trees made out of jelly… and you get the little toothpicks." He let go of both her hands and looked into her eyes again, positively beaming. "Allons-y!"

Then he spun around to the console and began pushing buttons and pulling levers. Rose, still laughing, and, amazed at this man who was hers, ran to the kitchen to find the sandwich-making stuff. She felt the jolt of the TARDIS taking off before long, but she had enough practice by now to stay upright (well, almost upright).

Clutching the wall with one hand for support, she yelled, "Allons-y!" back at the Doctor. He didn't answer, but she knew he had heard.


Did you strongly dislike it, so much that you'd rather have gotten run over by some freight train in the middle of Antarctica than read it again? Were you like, "Oh my goodness this is the bee's knees, it's better than my Great Aunt Agatha's homemade apple-rhubarb pie!"? Did you not really care either way? Please review! Or not. If you do, I love you. If you don't, I still love you! Have a super sneaky day! XD