He's only really ever wanted her. There's never been any other girls; it's always been her. Alwaysandforever. He told her that's how long they'll be friends for, but that's not really what he was talking about.
He remembers her last boyfriend – which wasn't so long ago that it'd be hard to remember – and he always feels hate fill him. Her last boyfriend was a prat. Her last boyfriend snogged other girls all the time, but she'd never believed it. He'd told her every time, and it caused them to fall apart. She refused to believe him and stopped talking to him.
And now she's dating someone else. Another prat who he often catches with other girls, but he doesn't tell her anymore. She still isn't talking to him. Besides, she won't believe him, so what's the point? There is none.
Except there is. Even if she won't believe him, she'll tell him off, and he'll get to hear her beautiful voice. But he doesn't want to hear it in a rage. Especially not in a rage at him. That's the worst, because it's only recently that she's started ever being mad at him.
So it's a lost cause. A vicious cycle. She breaks up with her current boyfriend, and starts dating another prat that cheats on her. And she never notices. It's tragic. He can't stand it, but he can't do anything. She hates him.
She was his best friend, so now that she's mad at him, he doesn't really have anyone to talk to. He's not going to write in a journal – he's not a pansy – so he keeps it bottled up inside. A fatal mistake.
It's a mistake that leads to his passing. The anguish in his heart, the tears he cried late at night when everyone was fast asleep, the red lines across his pale skin from when he couldn't handle the internal pain anymore. They were all steps on his way to ruin.
The day he dies is the day that she decides that she misses him and wants to be friends again. But she's too late. Isn't that how it always goes? And so she's the one to find him. A good thing, because he left her a note. And it's something not meant for anyone else's eyes.
"L - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. But if you had believed me, then I'd be okay. And maybe my love for you wouldn't have broken me. I'd still be whole, and I'd still be hoping for a day when we could be happy. Together. - L"