Author's Note: I PROMISE EVERYTHING WILL BE FINISHED XD
Disclaimer: Own nothing.
Dark shadows drifted through the vast infirmary, rows of bodies in various states of disrepair lined the cramped cots, the sounds of wails and the creaking groans of pain filtered through the thick transparent aluminium. Blaster twisted his head away from the despair he witnessed in some of those faces, finding himself staring at the once white and crimson coloured medic, whom was now stained in sticky spread of purple energon and the grey-brown of fluids, the slender shoulders slumped in the horror that lurked just beyond the glass.
The mech turned his back to the bodies, knowing some of the fallen belonged to friends, Prowl, Ratchet, Ironhide, and so many more, just a drop in the ocean of wounded. The expanse of dome overhead no longer shook with the explosives detonating against the weakening shield protecting this last refuge in Iacon.
"First Aid?" Blaster questioned softly, a hand stretched out to lightly touch the medic's shoulder, watching him start after a moment and turn towards him, blue visor dimmed almost to grey and stained with sprays of dried fluids. "How does it look?"
"Most will survive the night as long as they don't begin to bomb us again." Arms wrapped around himself, the slender frame swaying on his pedes, entire frame shaking like a half-cracked joint and could barely keep himself from dropping to the floor. Droplets slipped out from beneath the edge of the visor, glinting for a moment before disappearing into the edge of his blast mask. "Though... I have to admit I miss the sound... it... it muffled the sound of that." A shiver fluttered up the mech's spinal plates, a knuckle guard tapping lightly at the window, a shaking sob almost escaped him. "It is worse than the rage virus... and the damage that did to us all."
"They sit down... shut up... and for once I'm grateful for Hook's bedside manner and Soundwave." Shaking his head slightly, he was filled with a strange sense of disbelief at the thought that not only was he treating Decepticon soldiers, but also working elbow to elbow with them. "I wish Ratchet was here..." First Aid reached upwards to cover his mouth at the admission, before his fingers bumped into his battle mask, his head dipping sharply. "Its been... how many stellar cycles has it been since... since he was here?" Shoulders shuddered ever so slightly, gazing down into the illuminated vastness of the mass infirmary, picking out one of the perfectly still frames hooked up along one wall.
First Aid could barely keep all the soft sounds in. "He's right down there... Right there... life... flickering so dimly... but he's still in there and he was dumped on the Mausoleum... with the others! They all were... alive..." It had been horrifying to find that the new system that he and Wheeljack had originally been working with on Earth had actually worked out in an unexpected way. The spark had been placed in a kind of stasis, keeping them from fleeing from their frames and heading for the Matrix. It was a sickening thing to know that they may have remained like that forever if their bodies had not been recovered. Though right now, First Aid neither had the resources nor time to enact the necessary repairs.
"Yah need ta rest, Aid." Blaster caught the slender shoulder, pulling his friend towards him and just holding him for a long moment, keeping him close and wishing there was something he could do to ease the other mech's pain, even for a moment. It wasn't fair to First Aid to have the weight of fragging Cybertron on his slender shoulders. "Yah been repairin' them for so long... yah servos are startin' ta shake." One of his long-fingered hands reached out to curl around his companion's squeezing them softly. "Rest..."
The medic shook his head fiercely, somehow managing to ease his trembles, his small frame seeming to draw on some last hidden reserve of strength. "I have to get back down there... Thankyou."
"I didn't do anythin'." Blaster blinked sharply at the slender medic, receiving a look that definitely made him think the mech was smiling at him from behind that blast mask.
"You did. You cared. I'm glad that you do... to know that I have someone to look out for me."
"Aid... yah and Ratchet...? Were yah...?" It had always left him wondering, the two of them had always appeared to be close, or as close as a pair of medics could seem without doing something outright and fragging on the nearest medical berth.
"Nosy." The medic managed a small chuckle, brightening a little at the thought of Ratchet, even though the other medic was currently nothing more than a limp pile of something resembling scrap metal with a living spark. "No. No... we weren't, but if the war had ended before... before Megatron's final attack on Earth, then just maybe we would have."
"Yah're lucky, Aid." Blaster quirked a smile, feeling the aching hollowness resound within himself, fingers releasing the slender servo that had still been tucked within them. "Ta have such feelings."
"I'm sure there is someone, Blaster, how can people not like you?" There was a moment of silence, before the medic dipped his head and slipped out the door, appearing a few moments later back amongst the pallets, giving orders to the mechs that had been dragged in from everywhere if they had even the littlest bit of medical training.
Blaster leaned back against the edge of the window, his shoulders slumping as his forehead dipped forwards and pressed against the cool surface, letting his optics clench shut, almost wishing too for the bomb blasts to silence the sounds of the infirmary below.
He almost jolted at the sound of the door hissing open, letting in the tall, dark familiar shape of someone he definitely didn't know how to be around. Soundwave hovered for a moment, taking in Blaster and the obvious lack of jovial cheer the Autobot displayed. Both faced off for a moment, Blaster straightening, lips pressing together and attempting to brush off the fine layer of dust and grime that clung to his frame.
"Autobot." The mech greeted with the same monotone that seemed to permeate every player of the Decepticon's existence, making him appear as if he were nothing but a two dimensional hologram.
"Decepticon." Blaster returned, just looking the mech up and down for a long moment, lips a firm unwavering line, shoulders straightening and clearly not about to show any amount of weakness before Soundwave of all mechs. His fingers twitched, itching to be holding a weapon, anything to give him a feeling of security.
"It is your rest cycle." Firm, stiff and almost questioning, the mouth hidden beneath a battlemask.
"So?" Blaster challenged back slightly, startled by the fact that Soundwave knew that it was his rest period.
"Half an orn on the surface."
"Hey! Yah ain't my carrier." Crossing his arms, he was blinking in surprise at the Decepticon. There was no reason for Soundwave to be here, other than to either drag him back up to the command centre or to tell him there was a message he had missed that called for his attention. However, Soundwave would be quite capable of most of what Blaster was... even though he had to admit quietly to himself that this mech was a match for himself.
"You require rest."
"I do not." Blaster couldn't help an irritated pout, almost flinching away when a hand caught his elbow, preventing him from stepping away completely from the suddenly very near Soundwave. The moment Blaster attempted to step away from the wall and put all his weight on his own pedes, his blue optics flared wide, his legs almost giving out immediately under him, his only support coming from the Decepticon.
"Do not resist." It was a sharp tone, cutting through Blaster's protests, the grip powerful and easily buoying the Autobot up as he was practically 'dragged' towards the doorway, his body swaying and leaning heavily against the powerful frame against his one side, leaning heavily on that hand.
"Didn't think kidnappin' was quite yah style, Decepticon." Well... could this equate to abduction? His frame was willing to follow where it was led, melting against the solid warmth, his cheekplate suddenly bumping against a shoulder. Inhaling sharply, his blue optics shut tightly, trying to imagine this was someone else, that one of his friends had found him... A scowling Ratchet, a stoic Prime or even a grumbling Ironhide, dragging his aft back after a long mission when his energised personality could barely hold his frame up. His olfactory sensors twitched slightly, his face turning of its own accord a little more against that arm, inhaling slightly, catching a thousand different scents clinging to the dark blue surface. It smelt... good.
"You are mistaken." A soft whisper of breath, a hint that the mech was snorting with a flicker of humour, not the nasty rasp of sound that Blaster had heard a few times, but the geniune hint of amusement.
"So... yah are kidnappin' me?"
"Apparently." And optical ridges lifted a hint, the grip on Blaster's elbow gentled a little, supporting but not dragging any longer. "You require constant maintenance and it would appear it is far more efficient to keep you than to merely attempt to direct you verbally."
"Wha?" Blaster's blue optics had shuttered slightly again, just allowing himself to be drawn along, finding that for once he didn't feel the flutter of worry in his spark, the tremble of something deep in his tanks. The treaty was still enforced and First Aid had said Soundwave was enforcing it himself...
"You needed 'a hand'." The human phrase seemed to convey the best connotations to Blaster, not that the Autobot seemed quite willing to protest any longer. "Your apparent lack of care for your own outstanding maintenance troubled me."
"Trouble? I'm trouble with a capital T!" Blaster waved his free hand at a passing shape in the corridor before his vision tilted and the pressure shifted from his elbow to slide around his waist, supporting him more fully and his head was tucked between shoulder and throat. The soft pulse of systems thrummed beneath his audio, pulsing steadily, revealing that under all that armour Soundwave did have a spark after all.
"I do agree with that. You can be quite troublesome indeed..."
"Right... I needed to be trouble for you, since you wanted to take over the world and all..."
"Not precisely." Soundwave gripped the slender waist just a touch more tightly, giving anyone that gave them a second look a sharp scathing glare that managed to send most fleeing and looking anywhere but at them.
The Autobot raised both optical ridges like that, though his thoughts were drifting a little at the warmth of that arm, the wonderful feeling that came with being held securely like that. "Then what are yahr motives?" Lips parted slightly, entire frame shuddering.
"I was merely doing as my obligations demanded of me." Though it sounded strange coming from someone as fundamentally loyal as Soundwave, the mech had become extremely disillusioned with the slow breakdown of Galvatron's sanity, which had been shaky to start with. It had been Cyclonus that had forged the necessary alliance with Optimus Prime, hoping that eventually Megatron would be restored from the broken shell that was Galvatron. Soundwave had remained loyal to Cyclonus and also helped smooth as much as he could over between the furious Decepticons and the doubtful Autobots.
"I don't think yah would consider it like that... yah loved ta plunder and pillage..."
"Loved." There had been a time when he had genuinely enjoyed his position, but with time and with the toll the War took on them all, he no longer found anything enjoyable about his work. His spark had begun longing for peace, for a return to the days of the Golden Age. "I find no pleasure in War." He could not erase what he had done, there was no way to change the reality his actions had created. However, in the here and now he could do something, could ease the tension between the Autobots and Decepticons, give the tentative peace a chance to flourish... that was if they survived the night.
Soundwave stopped before a doorway, his hand lifting to tap in a code, hearing the soft hiss of the release of the lock as the door slipped back, revealing darkness beyond the opening. A pair of crimson optics stared out from within the blackness, a low sound of irritated hissing following as Blaster was swept inside, the door clicking shut behind them.
"Hey... hey! Wait a darn sec'! Where the frag are we?" Blaster struggled fiercely in the strong grip, almost ending up on the floor through his protests and the fact the only thing keeping him currently on his pedes was the powerful arm around his waist.
"Wha's the meanin' of this?"
"It seemed appropriate considering your quarters are on the other side of the complex and you are unable to walk unaided."
Blaster was being drawn in the direction of the berth, the back of it bumping against the mech's knee joints which buckled without hesitation as the mech found himself being twirled slightly, his legs lifted onto the softness of the berth. Soundwave shifting and leaning over the squirming mech whom was still attempting to protest the fact that he was on Soundwave's berth, slender hips arched and wiggled slender limbs tangling themselves in the blankets being slipped up over him.
The same pair of vivid crimson optics were staring from somewhere across the room from Blaster, before closing and the hissing slowly subsiding after some kind of silent reassurance that Blaster was not an enemy. Ravage was suddenly hovering over Blaster, nudging one shoulder in interest for a moment, sniffing slightly before curling up on the other side of the berth just out of reach. The crimson mech stared back, his protests dying in his vocal components when he gazed back at Soundwave.
"Why?" Blaster called at the dark shadow that was suddenly moving away, leaving him curled beneath thermal blankets in the berth that held the deep distinctive scent of the Decepticon. "Why did yah come find me?"
"You are important."
"Ain't that important that the second of Cyclonus would come drag my aft to a berth."
"You are important."
The hidden face turned back towards Blaster, the broad shoulders shrouded by the darkness, but even in the stiffness Blaster could see something... the faintest hint of genuine concern, emotion boiling up just beneath the surface. Was there something more to Soundwave than he had previously assumed? Something just beneath the surface? This was his enemy, yet... Soundwave was...
"To me." Soundwave finished ever so softly, before suddenly something tender and warm brushed a tender caress against Blaster's cheekplate, sweeping slowly from audio to the point of his chin, a thumb sliding lightly over a lower lip in what felt like an intimate caress. "Recharge."
Blaster stared up, optics wide and a vivid blue in the handsome lines of his facial plates, his mouth was open, jaw flapping slightly as if quite wanting to say something but nothing was deciding to come out of it. His denta clicked together as his lips pressed together, swallowing hard around the sudden pulse of his spark attempting to erupt upwards into his mouth at the gesture, which left his spark pounding wildly. This was definitely not happening! And he watched the retreating back, rolling onto his belly when the door hissed shut behind Soundwave and buried his face into the pillow, hugging it tightly. For the first time in a long time, Blaster didn't get out the last word. Whatever he had been expecting... that was not it!
"Frag... the whole universe has lost it!"
The dark frame sat heavily on the medical berth, his powerful shoulders drooped ever so slightly as he gripped tightly at the gaping wound that had been made in his thick armour, fluids dripping through between his digits and slid in dark rivulets down his arm. His head twisted just enough to regard the pretty figure that was suddenly coming through the doorway, calling out the name of the white and red medic that Soundwave had come to see.
Blaster stood there for a long moment, mouth flopping open like that of a fish, just watching the mech that sat on the berth across from the doorway. Not once in his entire existence had he caught even a glimpse of the face beneath the battlemask or the heavy duty visor, never even tried to imagine it, but whatever he could have imagined didn't stack up to the handsome facial plates that greeted him. He had been intent on finding First Aid, hoping that he might be able to get some kind of update on the repair work of several of his friends, knowing that he would be more than likely kicked out of the main Infirmary Hall in what had formally been the main staging area under one of Iacon's broad domes.
Soundwave froze as well, his crimson optics squinting against the harsh light, extremely sensitive to the slightest illumination and the almost blinding white light of the medbay was almost unbearable. "Blaster."
The crimson mech jerked back a step, audios tingling with the sound of his own name spoken by that firm mouth and shivered as a surprising flush of heat bubbled upwards, remembering the warm feeling of those arms curled around his frame, the heady scent of the mech on the fabrics stretched across the berth. It wasn't a monotone! Though it lacked any kind of true inflection, it was smoother and surprisingly musical, lilting pleasantly in its own way.
"My appearance offends."
"Nah... not at all..." A hand waved distractedly at that comment, Blaster's face burying itself into his palm and feeling the flush of heat rising from somewhere it definitely shouldn't be. This was Soundwave. Soundwave! His blue optics flashing through his fingers and for the first time realising that Soundwave was injured. "Hey... what happened ta yah?"
"Cliffjumper took a disliking to my interference in some of his 'affairs'." Soundwave stated matter-of-factly, feeling a little irritated with himself over it, he should have been able to handle the situation, not get himself shot up by the smaller crimson Autobot who clearly didn't like him in the slightest. His lips pressed together slightly, sighing a little and the slight play of muscle cables at the edge of his jaw the only sign that he was in quite debilitating pain.
"Let me guess... he was bangin' a few heads tagether." Blaster was hurrying forwards when his embarrassment was replaced with a strange jolt of concern, this mech had been kind to him, this dude wasn't so bad. "Or pickin' a fight."
"Indeed." Soundwave shifted slightly, feeling the warm fingers slide against his shoulder, brushing against the broken metal around the deep wound. Crimson optics flashed brightly at Blaster for a moment, saying nothing as he just watched the mech inspect the damage and clearly see what he could do until First Aid arrived.
"How can yah...?" That striking blue gaze flickered in a new found respect, his fingers curling tenderly around one elbow joint and carefully tucking the wounded arm up and into the mech's lap to prevent it from bumping against the edge of the berth and jarring the rather nasty wound. "Doesn't it hurt?"
"I do not notice it."
"Liar." The crimson Autobot snorted in gentle mocking, glad he knew how to patch up at least basic wounds, it was after all his duty to the Cassettes when they were with him to be able to tend to any of their damage. Staunching the flow of fluids, he was at least being able to ease the pain that the mech must have been feeling, his thigh lightly bumped against one strong knee, leaning slightly against the warmth and giving the Decepticon a cheeky smile. "So what happened ta Cliffjumper?"
"He is in the charge of Inferno and Red Alert." Thankfully Inferno didn't seem to take a dislike to him, dragging the Autobot warrior off to either the brig or back outside, however he had gotten quite a few frightened glances from Red Alert. "The appropriate action will be taken as it was in the case of the Decepticon troublemaker."
"Can yah tell me... how it's goin'?" A finger gestured upwards, indicating the ships in orbit and the fighting occurring in dispersed pockets out there. "Its all... so far away now..."
"There are some claiming victory already. However, the Quintessons are still holding out on the moons and also in space just beyond the last lunar orbital path." There wasn't as much need for the likes of him out there, the fighting and the scrapping of both Trans-Organics and Sharkticons had been left to those built for heavy combat. "There are patches still here on Cybertron, but not as many as before." His optics shuttered for a long moment, his vision was already almost white, the blurry edges of Blaster all he could make out in the bright light. "There are more injured than not. What is left of our people is here..."
"Yah're worried?" Blaster leaned against one of the Decepticon's knees, his hand resting against the warm thigh and just leaned in, seeking the comfort of another's warmth, the sense that even though he was now relegated like most to remaining within the safety of Iacon, he wasn't alone.
"I am." One hand slimmed along a slender shoulder, thumb brushing against the inside of the slender arm, just sensing the other more than seeing him, the back of his fingertips stroked a tender line up along the heated plating of the elegant neck. Palm spreading across the metal, his digits swept out and across the edges of the mech's sleek helm, feeling the mech draw in a little closer to him in response to the action. "I do not wish for this Treaty to fall apart. I wish for peace."
The Autobot had never felt this particular coil of heat wrap itself around his spark, the bubble of something that was unstoppable as it fluttered upwards, making him lean into the touch against his cheekplate. Blue optics flickered upwards, gazing into the handsome features, sensing the sincerity behind the words, he had to admit he agreed. This war had stolen everything from Cybertron and left it as nothing more than a husk truthfully. Nuzzling his cheekplate into that palm, his hand curled around it, committing it to memory, committing this sensation to the core of his spark. "I understand, 'Wave. I really do."
"Blaster." Soundwave wanted to say something, desperate to be able to get out something that had for quite a long time been silenced in his throat and by the fact that they had been deadly enemies. "Blaster..." His touch gentled even further, caressing across that beautiful face, drawing him in even closer... "I."
"Excuse me." First Aid paused in the doorway, flustering slightly as he glanced between the two Cybertronians, optical ridges lifting behind his visor. Clearing his vocal components, he gave Blaster a rather interested look, before moving forwards, suddenly realising that Soundwave was wounded. "A pair of fools you both are not calling me." He was already nudging Blaster away, catching the look of reluctance that flashed across the Autobot's features, which earned Blaster an almost bemused smile from First Aid.
Palm sliding down across one thigh, his fingers rubbed almost intimately against the seams, feeling the last brushing caress of Soundwave's hand in return. His spark caught again, fluttering wildly as their optics met for a moment, his facial components suddenly feeling like they were badly overheating. What in Primus's name was he doing? This was Soundwave! Yet, his frame still tingled from the delicate touches to it, reminding him of the day before, the feeling of that strong arm drawing him close, the warm feeling that lingered long after the touches had gone.
"I apologise." Soundwave tipped his head slightly, wincing slightly when the medic started poking around inside of the opened shoulder, grumbling over what Cliffjumper had caused. However, his gaze followed Blaster for a moment, quite wanting to finish what he had began to say but saw that Blaster was already half out through the doorway, fleeing from whatever had happened between them, leaving the Decepticon sighing and looking nonplussed.
"I interrupted something, didn't I?" Blue optics peered upwards at Soundwave from behind a protective visor, the light already being dimmed to a comfortable level to prevent Soundwave's optics from shorting out or flickering with black spots that had started to dance before his vision.
"You did not." The mech attempted to reassure the medic, really not quite wanting anyone to know that he was and had for quite a long time carried feelings for Blaster. It was something that was admittedly startling to even Soundwave himself, he had never quite been one for 'loving' people, but there was just something about Blaster that drew him in, even though he didn't know what the mech would say in response to it if he ever did get a chance to say something. At least physically though, there seemed to be a mutual attraction, something that he was forever grateful for.
"Do I have to wheedle it out of you?" First Aid was grateful for the rather intriguing distraction being offered by the Decepticon, whom the medic decided he was fond of and would in the future hopefully be able to consider a friend. Soundwave was the loyal type, something that strangely reminded him of Ironhide, willing to do anything for Optimus Prime, including give his life if he could.
"I would suggest you reserve your wheedling for those more inclined to be wheedled." The crimson optics flickered slightly, shifting uncomfortably on the berth and confusingly wondering if he should indeed talk to the medic. There was no one he had been able to talk to in a particularly long time that he knew he could trust not to use anything he said as leverage to gain something over him. Many Decepticons were unhappy about the treaty but most understood the necessity of it, they had been allowed back on Cybertron, back home after the cold and famine of Charr.
"You are the most agreeable of Decepticons... but I guess even you don't trust us Autobots." The slender white and crimson mech blinked up from the wound, clearly recognising the damage pattern and his hands stilled for a moment. "But I cannot blame you... even when you are the one keeping this Treaty together."
"I doubt I have done that much."
"You understate everything. You've done more than everyone else put together and made my job and that of my fellow medics a great deal safer. Decepticons are not known for their patience or their like of Autobots... but not one of the medics has been hurt since you started at them." The Autobot was grateful for it, carefully injecting a very mild pain killer into the mech's systems, watching the broad shoulders and knotted muscle cables relax a little in response. "You aren't what I expected either."
That made Soundwave almost chuckle, one optical ridge lifting ever so slightly in question.
"Soundwave superior..." First Aid attempted his best rendition of Soundwave's monotone, though failed quite miserably at it, but that only got him another odd look from the Decepticon. "Okay... that wasn't the best... but still... you get the idea, right?"
"I do." The mech agreed softly, lips pressing together in a firm line. "I will simply say I merely wish to be able to keep the peace and quiet."
"Hang on..." First Aid's optics blinked wide and stared at the mech, attempting to work out if the large and formidable Decepticon was either joking or actually meant what he said.
"What is it you honestly wish to know, First Aid?" Both optical ridges lifted slightly in enquiry, gazing down at the medic with a look of mild interest. Relaxing and allowing the medic to continue what he was doing, Soundwave decided he would talk, even if it was a little odd for him to do so.
"You and Blaster..." A long pregnant pause followed, followed by the mech clearing his throat and peering intently at the circuits that he was repairing and in some cases removing to be replaced. "You love him."
"I am obvious?"
"More like... I know the feeling, I know what its like to love someone and well... not know if they realise the way you feel about them..."
A mournful look flittered across the partially hidden face, before trying to give a half-sparked smile at the flutter of remembrance of something that Soundwave was only left to guess at. "I have hopes that I'll be able to revive him... only when there are enough components to go around... everything is stretched as it is." Though he was using what spares he did have for Soundwave, this mech was important and needed to be in prime condition to keep everything together for the medics' sakes. "Maybe then... I'll have more luck, but for now..."
"For now, you can only dream." Soundwave was glad when his shoulder finally stopped throbbing, the plating beneath it being repaired and finally his cracked visor and damaged helm was being carefully fixed. "Do you think...?" The mech glanced at the medic for a long moment, one large hand curling around the slender wrist, holding it still and keeping the Autobot in close to watch his reaction. "Would he accept my advances?"
"I can only say, I hope he does. He needs someone to keep him centred, being without the cassettes, being without friends here... its hard on him, but I think, if you keep trying he will see that you love him." First Aid had had a few talks in his time with Blaster, knowing that the mech had lacked a long term partner since before the war, the mech had never truly had anyone love him and it took its toll, even on Blaster's bright cheerful personality, this war had taken its toll. "I think he would be good for you too, something to hold on to, something to protect."
"You read me well." His grip loosened around that slender wrist, nodding slightly in agreement. "If you ever require anything, First Aid, do not hesitate to ask." Friend. The word echoed through his spark, warming him, giving him a sense of some kind of peace, this was the first true friend he had had since before the war, someone that wouldn't put up with his stiff front, but wasn't going to use what he said against him.
"You're more than welcome, Soundwave. You aren't a Decepticon anymore, see?"
Optical ridges pressed together sharply at that, feeling the light tap against his chest where he used to carry the 'cassette' space inside of his frame, the marks of his faction had worn away over the course of the time he had been on Cybertron and his armour had taken a battering. No longer did he have any distinguishing faction symbol and for once he felt a weight lift off his chassis, something heavy falling away. In this peace... he could renounce the Decepticons. He knew it seemed highly illogical and against all of his loyalties to defect in such a sense as this. Frame worn by fighting and internal conflicts within his faction, spark beaten by the long abuse suffered as he remained loyal to Galvatron until he began to disobey the erratic orders, Soundwave was tired of being a 'warrior'.
"I am not an Autobot either. I am simply, me."
Part one XD I might as well put it up^^ but I WILL get to finishing it ^_^ after this damned plot idea goes away and I finish it! LOOOL its eating me! I haven't disappeared! I promise! I will get to everything.