"Crush"

Season 2

Takes place sometime during the early portion of Season 2. Depicts how Bobby and Lindsay came to be "recreational". Lyrics are from Dave Matthews Band's Crush.

Lightening flashed and thunder shook the building. It was a stormy Thursday night and the only souls left at the office of Donnell and Associates were Bobby and Lindsay. Bobby was working on his latest murder trial with Lindsay as second chair. Bobby stared out from the main office as rain pounded the window pane. He knew it was well past seven and neither had the chance to grab any dinner. However, the storm appeared relentless and so he sighed and walked back into his office.

Lindsay was seated on the dark leather couch with her legs comfortably tucked behind her. Her shoes were off and she sat rubbing her feet as she intently poured over a file. He couldn't help but notice how adorable she looked. Lindsay glanced up just as Bobby was mid-stare. He could feel himself turning crimson as she looked at him questioningly and then asked what was wrong. "Nothing", he said, casually shaking the thought from his mind. "I was just thinking it's late and we're hungry."

"I'm starving, actually." Lindsay stated as she sat up on the couch. She definitely felt a hunger stare from Bobby but something told her it was not food he desired. "I think I've managed to find a way to create reasonable doubt, although it's a stretch." "Can we discuss it after we eat?" asked Bobby. "The rain sounds murderous Linds, do you just want to call for delivery?" "No, I think we should brave it", Lindsay said with a smirk "I might become murderous if we don't leave soon. I need to get out of this office, I've been here all day". "All right" said Bobby "let me finish my beer and we'll head out".

Bobby walked over and sat next to Lindsay. His leg brushed against hers and for a second she felt weak. She felt her pulse rising and all of her senses heightened. He relaxed and sat back comfortably. She turned to face him as he said something she didn't hear. All she could focus on were how blue his eyes looked at the moment. He smiled and stared which made her blush. "Earth to Lindsay? I asked what you were thinking of getting for dinner?" "Oh um I...Chinese?" Bobby chuckled and asked "that hungry huh?" "Yeah" Lindsay replied looking down and feeling stupid. "I actually ordered in last night but never touched the stuff" said Bobby. "We could reheat at my place and work on the case there?" "That works for me." answered Lindsay. She knew she needed to create some sort of barrier between her and Bobby before her mind wandered any further. She always thought he was attractive but tonight she felt something different. Something in his eyes told her he felt the same.

'Crazy how it feels tonight

Crazy how you make it all right love

You crush me with the things you do

I do for you anything too

Sitting, smoking, feeling high

In this moment it feels so right

Lovely lady I am at your feet

God I want you so badly'

Bobby could feel his heart pulsating but he didn't know why. His senses were going crazy and he felt he might have had more to drink than he thought. He looked down at his beer and saw it was half full. The scent of her perfume, the way her hair kept falling into her face, her lips as they curled into a smile; it was all driving him crazy and pushing him closer to her. He sensed she was feeling it too and allowed his leg to remain against hers. Wrong or right, he couldn't comprehend. He leaned over to place his beer on the table placing himself ever so close to Lindsay.

She could smell his cologne and it was intoxicating her to no end. As he leaned back into his place on the couch his hand grazed her thigh. He turned to face her to apologize but instead caught her staring at his mouth. Without thinking he brought his mouth up to meet hers. He pulled back to gauge her reaction but she inched forward and parted his lips with her tongue. He deepened the kiss and pulled her closer to him. Lindsay's body was on fire. She didn't want to stop but she couldn't help the hundreds of thoughts racing through her mind. Mainly the thought of it's wrong but it feels so right. Quickly she pulled away and started apologizing. "Bobby I don't know what came over me. I'm sorry.." "Linds it was my fault. I..." they both looked at each other and started laughing. Neither knew what to say or address what was occurring between them.

"Well how about we brave that storm, it doesn't sound as menacing" , Lindsay quickly changed the subject. They packed up the case files without saying a word. Lindsay's mind was still racing. She was heading to his apartment. This could not be a good idea after what had just happened. 'Maybe I should make an excuse to head home?' she thought to herself. "All set?" Bobby asked, startling her out of her train of thought. "Yep, all set." responded Lindsay. She was going to pretend like everything was fine. They walked out of the office, down the hall and into the elevator. The ride down seemed painstakingly slow as they reached the ground floor. Bobby offered to pull his car around the front so Lindsay wouldn't get wet but she didn't want to be left alone in her thoughts. She agreed to get the car with him. As they stepped outside the rain and wind immediately greeted them. They raced across the street laughing as they were already soaked to the bone. They reached the parking garage and Lindsay glanced down. "Oh great. Perfect day to wear white." Bobby looked over and laughed at the sight. Lindsay's hair was matted down, her mascara was running and he could see her bra through her shirt. "Looks good on you." he said factiously. "Shut up Bobby. Just for that I'm getting into your car soaking wet." Lindsay opened the passenger door and sat down. Despite the fact that it was a relatively warm summer night the dampness made her shiver and she put her arms across her chest. Bobby hopped in and immediately noticed her shivering. He placed his jacket over her shoulders and Lindsay gave him a grateful smile.

As they made their way out into the city of Boston Bobby turned on the radio. Lindsay giggled as "Don't Stop Believin" by Journey came on. "What's so funny?" asked Bobby. "Nothing, I like this song." Lindsay turned up the radio and started singing along trying to get Bobby to sing along with her. "Linds I don't sing" "Oh come on, I'm terrible but it's fun!" "I've noticed." Bobby cheekily responded. A few seconds later he felt a smack on his arm and Lindsay pouted as she turned down the radio. "Linds I was just kidding...'Street lights peopleeee'" Lindsay broke into a big grin and turned the music back up.

'I wonder this

Could tomorrow be

So wondrous as you lay there sleeping

Lets go drive til morning comes

Watch the sun rise to fill our souls up

Drink some wine til we get drunk'

"Well here it is" Bobby stated as he pulled into a spot right in front of the apartment building. Lindsay had never seen his place before and was actually surprised at how nice of a neighborhood he lived in. "I didn't know you had a place in Beacon Hill. For someone who hates blue chip you sure live like one." Lindsay teased. "Yeah, yeah", replied Bobby. They made their way to the apartment entrance and Bobby held the door for Lindsay to get in. Bobby hit the light and immediately went to the refrigerator. "Can I get you a beer?" "Sure, that'd be great." replied Lindsay. She glanced around the apartment. It was small but nice. It definitely felt masculine and sparsely decorated. She imagined he didn't spend much time here anyway with the hours he kept at the office. Bobby handed her a beer and disappeared around the corner. He reappeared two minutes later with big fluffy towels and sweats. "I thought you might want to change out of those wet clothes." "Yeah, thanks Bobby." Bobby directed her toward the bathroom and Lindsay walked in. She immediately gasped when she saw herself in the mirror. "I look like a drowned rat." she laughed to herself. She quickly removed the wet clothes, changed into the sweats and dried her hair with the towel. The clothes smelled like Bobby and it made her smile but a bit nervous. She took a big swig of the beer as she cleaned the make-up off of her face and pulled her hair into a ponytail. Feeling much better she emerged from the bathroom with a smile. Bobby couldn't help but smile at the sight of her in his clothes. She looked too good in them. 'She would look even better out of them' his mind started trailing and he scolded himself. Lindsay caught the disgruntled look on his face and wondered if she had done something. "Food almost hot?" she asked as her stomach growled in anticipation. "Oh right," Bobby said completely forgetting why they had come to his apartment to begin with "Let me just get some plates.." "I can help." Lindsay offered as she walked into the kitchen. She then noticed Bobby had changed his clothes as well. He was wearing an old Red Sox t-shirt with rolled up grey sweat pants. He looked a little scruffy and it made Lindsay want him even more. Bobby caught the way Lindsay was looking at him and it made his body spark. He couldn't hold back anymore. He carefully set the plates back down on the counter and swept her into a deep kiss. Lindsay responded feverishly placing her arms around his neck and pulling him closer. All thoughts of food were forgotten. He picked her up with her legs wrapped around his waist and carried her to his room. Ever so gently he laid her onto the bed carefully keeping his hand behind her head.

'It's crazy I'm thinking

Just knowing that the world is round

Here I'm dancing on the ground

Am I right side up or upside down

Is this real or am I dreaming

Lovely lady let me drink you please

I won't spill a drop I promise you

Lying under this spell you cast on me

Each moment the more I love you

Crush me'

Her body trembled as she allowed him to remove all traces of clothing. He eagerly began kissing the length of her body but she pulled him back to meet her mouth. He stepped back for a second to take in the beauty before him. She lay there feeling vulnerable, excited and hungry. He had fantasized about this so many times before but now there she was. She had pictured it a dozen times in her mind but now here he was. They wasted no time exploring each other for the first time to see if reality matched fantasy.

'Lovely lady I will treat you sweetly

Adore you I mean you crush me

It's times like these when my faith I feel

And I know how I love you

Come on Lady'

An hour later Lindsay found herself entangled with Bobby. Her back to him with his arms around her tightly. Their breathing was still rapid and she could feel her heart pounding in her chest. She began to relax as Bobby stroked her arms. She responded by sweetly kissing his hand. As badly as she wanted to lay there forever her body was letting her know it desperately needed to be fed. Bobby picked up on it as well as he kissed the back of her neck and then got up to heat the food leaving Lindsay in a tangle of sheets on the bed. She rolled over and stared up at the ceiling. 'What just happened?' she wondered to herself. She never let herself go like that with anyone before. It was beyond anything she had imagined. She wasn't sure what it meant to him. 'Surely he couldn't have felt what I was feeling' she thought. A delicious smell started to creep into the room and she realized how ravenous she was. She quickly slipped on Bobby's old t-shirt and walked into the kitchen. Bobby was standing at the microwave in only his underwear. She smiled and sheepishly said "Hey." Bobby sensed her insecurity and tightly wrapped his arms around her. "Hey", he said kissing her on the forehead. She felt a bit better and helped him with the food. They set up their dinner and sat down to eat. Lindsay didn't know what to say. Bobby didn't know what to think. Tonight had hit him like a brick wall. He finally realized what was in front of him the entire time...Lindsay. She was smart, gorgeous, kind, funny...he could go on with all of the many adjectives to describe her. He felt the fluttering sensation in his stomach when he looked at her. A silly grin spread across his face as he realized how natural this all felt. Lindsay didn't catch his grin though. "I don't think this should happen again." Lindsay broke his euphoric thought train. "What?" he blurted out without realizing. Lindsay didn't know what to do. She knew it was wrong. He was her boss! He could never love her. 'Why am I even thinking of love' she thought. She was confused. She was always good at sabotaging anything good that came into her life. She needed to push him away to see if he'd chase after her. "I really enjoyed tonight. I did. But I...just...well.." "Lindsay just say it.." "It isn't right Bobby. We work together. People would think..." "Lindsay I think you're jumping pretty far ahead of yourself. Can we just eat? Tonight just...well...happened. It isn't right or wrong." 'Shit', she thought to herself 'He must think I'm crazy. Here I am talking as if we're entering a relationship and we only JUST slept together'. "I know, you're right. I'm sorry." They finished dinner talking decidedly on the case they were working on. Bobby offered to clean the dishes while Lindsay took a shower. She desperately needed to clear her mind. As he washed the dishes he felt a bit hurt and rejected. 'She doesn't want this to happen again' he wondered to himself. He felt foolish for thinking it meant more than it did.

'Love we'll beat back the pain we've found

You know I mean to tell you all the things

I've been thinking

Deep inside my friend

With each moment

The more I love you

Crush me

Come on

So much you have given love

That I would give you back again and again

Meaning I'll hold you

And please let me always'

Lindsay felt the water cascade down her body. His lips, his touch, his scent...she couldn't shake it off of her. She knew she was in for it. How stupid she felt for caving into her desires. She had just slept with her boss. She had enjoyed it though and she did want it to happen again. They both were adults after all. They could handle something like this. He could never fall in love with her. 'No,', she thought 'I won't allow myself to fall in love with him either'. She finished her shower and slipped into a nice warm towel. The fabric felt so good against her skin. She stood in the bathroom enjoying the steam until she realized she forgot to bring in a change of clothes. She opened the bathroom door and almost walked right into Bobby. "Sorry, I just wanted to bring you these." Bobby handed her the sweats from earlier. He was still in only his underwear. "Bobby I didn't mean for what I said earlier to come out the way it did. You're right. It isn't right or wrong. It just...is." Lindsay stared at him for a reaction. Bobby was prepared to act as if it were a mistake and put it behind them but the way she looked at him told him he shouldn't. He was going to go with his instinct. They had done too much analyzing over the case. He didn't want to think this one through. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into a kiss. "You'll have to stop me then because I can't stop myself." He said as continued to shower her with kisses. Lindsay was in no position to object. She responded to his every touch and they found themselves back in the bedroom. There was no holding back. The rain added the perfect beat to their rhythm. Both were determined to enjoy each other regardless of the consequences it might bring.

Lindsay awoke to an ear piercing beeping sound. She opened one eye and started to panic. Where was she? What time was it? This wasn't her alarm clock. She jumped as a hand reached over her and pacified the noise. Immediately everything came back to her. She relaxed as Bobby pulled her into his body. "Good morning." he said with a smile. "I forgot where I was for a second." she responded. "Oh, I thought the idea of waking up next to me made you jump." Bobby jokingly replied. "Bobby we do need to discuss this. If we're going to continue this we need to make sure no one finds out. Especially no one from the office. It has to be our little secret." Lindsay turned to face Bobby. "I understand Lindsay. So this is some sort of no strings attached thing?" "Well it's completely understandable Bobby. We're both adults working long hours with no time to really go out and meet anyone. We're just saving ourselves the trouble by making it easy. No pressure and no obligations." "I can agree with that. Don't you think we need to draw a few boundaries?" "Well Bobby how about we continue this until one of us finds someone that could be...worth the trouble? You know...like relationship material?" "So you're saying we're not relationship material?" Bobby teased her. "I'm just saying we're making our lives easier by not going down that road." "I know Lindsay I completely agree." "Good. In that case would you mind giving me a ride to my car? Going into work in yesterday's clothes, which I'm sure are still wet, might be a dead giveaway." "Of course." Bobby replied. He layed back and felt a strange sensation. It was if he had entered some sort of contract with her. Not one he was about to complain about but he wondered if it would really work and if he would be able to keep his feelings at bay. Lindsay also wondered whether it was a good idea to have no attachments. She knew herself and she knew she would eventually fall for him. 'Oh well', she thought 'I'll enjoy it while I can'. She smiled thinking how a little crush could turn into so much overnight.