Just another weird thought that ran through my head and begged me to type it out. I hope it is at least mildly entertaining. Reviews would be awesome and a motivator for more chapters. Thanks for checking it out. :)
By the way, I do not own SPN but man, wouldn't that be the coolest?
Son of a bitch. Okay, that thing just spit at me. That's bad. Didn't Sam say something about how the saliva from this bastard can be deadly? God, and it reeks. Maybe they paralyze you with their damn stench first. Pew. Gross. That is beyond nasty. Okay, I see Sam. Be sneaky bro. Shit, did it just hear him? Okay Dean, time to get that damn thing's attention back onto you and not Sammy.
"Really dude, have you never heard of a freakin tic tac? I mean c'mon, just between you and me, you have got some major halitosis going on, and it ain't pretty."
Good. Got it's attention again. C'mon Sammy, c'mon, time to pump this fugly full of lead. Shit. Almost got me that time with another stanky wad of..uh...stank. Man, it is just so gross. Ugh, I am gonna need a steaming hot shower after this. I can almost feel the stench on me. Blah.
"HA! Missed me! AGAIN! Time's running out, you are gonna be so freakin dead in like a second you ugly piece of shit. Any second now."
C'mon Sammy, what's the hold up here?
"Or, maybe NOW!"
Sam, line up the shot bro cuz it's starting to get it's sights on me.
Oh no you don't. Shit. Damn it. That hurts you asshole. The splatter off the fricken tree got me? Are you serious? Did it do that on purpose? This thing, is it actually intelligent? Huh, touche my evil adversary. Touche. Ah well, it just stings, nothing too serious. I mean really, how bad could one or two drops be? I'm still standing right? And you my evil friend are still gonna die. Do it Sammy. Now.
Woah. Good shot. Take that you piece of crap.
"So, how does it feel? Not so good huh? What's a matter? Not so quick on the draw with your pukey spit machine now are ya buddy?"
I'm babbling. Why am I babbling? Frick, does that mean something? Nah, it's good. Just glad to see this mother on his way out. No harm in rubbing it in a bit more.
"What's that, I can't make out what you're saying. Oh right, cuz it must be kinda hard to talk when your head is full of lead."
Cool, I'm a poet...and I didn't even know it. Okay, that was fairly gay dude.
"Bon Voyage slimeball. And I do mean slimeball, like, literally dude."
Okay, so now where is the man of the hour? Sammy, slimeball liquidator? Is he okay? Yeah, just relax man, it's all good, here he comes. Well that's a relief. Huh, that's weird. My legs kinda feel off, wobbly. Well, I did do a lot of running right? Hey, the ground right here against this tree looks comfortable. I'll just sit down right here for a second until Sam gets here. It's always good to give the legs a bit of a rest once in a while right?
Sam, this is a really big tree bro. Wow, I can't even see the top. Cool. There sure are a lot of stars out tonight. Huh.
"Dean! C'mon, focus man. Did it get you? Look at me. DEAN!"
Too loud Sam. Way too fricken loud. Thanks for the instant headache dude. Cripes, just relax, I'm good.
"Sam. Good shot dude. You make your big brother proud."
"Listen to me Dean. Did it get you?"
Huh. There is nothing more awkward than having a grown man start to check you out for phantom injuries.
"Quit touching me dude. It barely got me. Just a couple drops man. Relax."
Shit. I hate that stupid sigh. Why does he always make that sound? I hate it. It means that he doesn't believe me. He thinks I am hurt and hiding something from him. But really, it's just a couple of drops Sammy, no need to worry. Nothing a good shower won't cure.
"Okay Dean. Listen. The fact that only a couple drops got you is good, well, it is the only reason that you are still breathing. But, this shit is bad bro and we need to get you back to Bobby's like now. We need to go. NOW Dean!"
Frick, my head is gonna pop right off. Stop with the screaming bro, you always get too worked up about nothing. I'm fine.
"Shhh..quiet Sammy. Head hurts. I'm fine. Just needed to rest for a minute. And please, stop giving me the eyeball already."
"Let's go Dean."
Okay, so this is kind of unexpected. I can almost hear the I told you so now. I am so damn tired that I can't even push myself up off the ground. I can sense that Sam is getting a bit, shall we say, worked up, so I guess for now I will just admit defeat and get the damn puppy dog eyeballs over and done with.
"Uh, little help here Sam. I can't seem to get up."
I don't know which I hate more. The fact that Sammy doesn't say a word or having to hear that damn sigh again. Either way it makes me think that perhaps I am in a little more trouble than I first thought. Awesome.
TBC... Please let me know what you think and thanks for reading!