Dalton was a place that promised excellence in every course or extra curricular they provided. Money was certainly never a problem in attaining any and all resources needed to achieve that guarantee so the state of the outside campus didn't come as a surprise to anyone.
State of the art equipment littered many of the always pristine green fields along with tracks and bleachers. It was a place that the star athletes and jocks or students wanting to exercise could always be found occupying.
Liam Robertson was not one of those people.
He had never had any desire to ever join a sports team nor attend an over exuberant school pride filled game. Never had he spent more time that wasn't absolutely mandatory sitting in the bleachers or running on the track, so it came as a surprise to everyone when he was seen jogging around the track early in the morning.
Originally, he had planned on going to breakfast on that warm Wednesday morning but he had ultimately changed his plans when he had glanced out the window and saw a sight that both shocked and pleased him.
Sure enough, the boy he had been meaning to find and beat some answers out of was jogging in what had to be the fanciest track suit he had ever seen in his life. His mind was made up in approximately two seconds- he would be skipping breakfast to go see the one and only Kurt Hummel.
He ended up making his way outside about eleven minutes later, having had to go back to his room and change into an acceptable work out outfit. So now, donning a pair of baggy shorts and a loose t shirt, he began his jog to catch up with Kurt.
With his long legs, the task was an easy one, but the smaller boy seemed to be determined today as he visibly pushed himself to keep running even after his cheeks turned red.
"Hummel." Liam breathed out, running up besides the out of breath boy.
Kurt, who up until now, had been seemingly deep in thought and squeaked a little at the word. "Geeze Liam, do you even know how to start a conversation properly without scaring someone?" He bit out, placing his hand on his heart and slowing down his run somewhat.
"What are you doing out here during breakfast?" He asked, keeping pace easily with Kurt.
"And I'm decidedly good looking." The taller boy blinked. "Stop playing games Hummel. Why are you skipping breakfast to run in circles?"
"I'm actually not skipping breakfast. I have a free period this morning so I'll get something to eat then." He told him, sticking his nose up in the air and turning his head to look away from the blonde boy.
Liam just nodded, making a mental note to make sure that Kurt actually did get breakfast sometime this morning. "And where is lover boy at this fine hour?"
Kurt glanced at the school and then back to Liam. "Probably in class, which reminds me. Shouldn't you be inside and in class right now?"
Liam shrugged. "I'll go later. Right now I want to talk to you."
"And what about?"
The taller boy sighed. "I think you know what about, Kurt. You're not that dumb, are you?"
Kurt slowed his run down to a walk and glared up at Liam. "I'm fairly certain of what you would like to speak with me about and I can tell you already that it's none of your business."
"Well, you see, I don't really care what you think." Liam ground out the words. "When you decided to stick your fingers down your throat like an emotional pre teen on my watch, it became my business."
Kurt stopped walking as his eyes hardened and he wrapped his arms around himself. "You are an asshole, Liam. Leave me alone." The words were as harsh as Kurt felt, but the taller boy just stepped closer.
"You need to take a step back and look at your life, Hummel. You need help so get off your high horse and talk to me." Liam's eyes pierced Kurt's cold ones with every word.
"Thanks, but you are the last person I would ever willingly accept help from. Like you said, it was under your watch that this all happened." Each word dripped with acid and cut through Liam's glare.
"You cannot seriously be implying that it was my fault that you got down on your knees in front of a toilet and emptied your stomach!" He scoffed incredulously. "Jesus Christ, Kurt. I basically laid out my crappy life experiences for you to see on the way there. I tried to be your friend and you're telling me that I was part of the reason you did this to yourself?
No, no way. Like it or not, you did this to yourself and now you have to fix it. I just want to help."
Kurt was silent for a minute before peering up at Liam with a pair of watery guarded eyes. "I'm sorry. It's my entire fault that all of this happened. I'm the cause of all these problems. Is this what you wanted to hear?" He stuttered out in a voice that made Liam back track on what he had previously said.
"Wait, Kurt, no! That's not what I-"
"I was just trying to get Blaine and all of this happened. I did this all because I wanted something. I was selfish. Are you happy now!"
Liam floundered for a second before pulling Kurt awkwardly to his chest and patting his head like he was a stray dog that possibly had rabies. "Chill out, okay? I didn't mean it like that." Kurt sighed and counted to ten, calming his breathing.
The brunette pulled away, still looking like someone had thrown his turtle and Liam sighed. "C'mon, we are going to go get some food."
Kurt followed silently behind Liam into the dining hall where a few kids still resided.
The taller boy had been painfully truthful in his confrontation and Kurt couldn't help but run over the conversation in his head on a loop. He had been right; it was his entire fault that this had happened and now he needed to fix it.
You made your bed, now you have to lie in it.
Kurt had accepted that he needed help and was awaiting the news from his dad on the next step they would take with all of this so he took some comfort in the fact that after a while, the constant worrying would lessen up and he would have space to take a breath again.
That was also the reason why he had been outside this morning, jogging away all of the calories he had gained from eating all of the food without ridding himself of it. Now that he was getting help, he couldn't be avoiding food, but he certainly wasn't going to let his weight get out of control again nor was he ready to let go of the feeling he got when he buttoned a smaller size of jeans.
It wasn't until the unlikely pair was sitting at a table that they spoke again.
"Are you getting help?" Liam questioned, taking a sip of the juice he had gotten.
Kurt just nodded. "My dad is looking into clinics around here so I can stay at school."
It was surprising Kurt how good it felt to be talking about this with someone else. He was absolutely not ready to tell everyone else about his issues and problems and have them undoubtedly judge him. But Liam was someone who already knew the situation and wasn't going to judge him seeing as he had quite a few problems of his own.
The weight being lifted of his chest felt good; almost as good as the feeling he got when Blaine told him he loved him or when he kissed him.
"Why did you do it?" The tone was undoubtedly more careful with these words.
Kurt looked down for a moment before speaking and when he did it was in a slow and measured tone. "When I started doing this, it was with the sole goal of being wanted by Blaine. Obviously it helped seeing as Blaine and I are now boyfriends."
"You're a dip shit." Liam stated in a monotone voice and took a bite of his toast, chewing lazily as he watched Kurt's eyes narrow.
"And why is that?"
"Its common knowledge to everyone and their mother that Blaine has been in love with you since you two met." Kurt scoffed loudly, not believing those words in the slightest.
"I'm pretty sure you doing" He motioned to Kurt's stomach. "This to yourself has only hurt him. You should have seen him when I told him." The words were choked out around a mash of food in his mouth.
"Oh yeah, I've been meaning to thank you for that." Kurt but out sarcastically. "Next time you want to tell someone about an issue in my life, do yourself a favor and drink bleach instead." He tore apart a piece of bacon rather violently before looking up to Liam once again.
"How did you even find out what was happening? If my memory serves me right, you were very heavily intoxicated during that chaotic mess you call a party." He shook away the memories of Liam dancing with a faceless partner and the grimy bathroom he had entered.
"My sister was also at the party. She specifically remembers talking to you. I'm sure you remember her. About ye high," He rose his hand to indicate the height. "Stoned out of her mind and as skinny as you?"
And suddenly all Kurt could remember was the claustrophobic feeling of being in the nasty bathroom.
She gave him a toothy smile, revealing her yellow teeth and grabbed his arm, her dirty nails digging into his shirt. "It's okay. We all just want to be perfect." The words came out in a stage whisper of bad breath that assaulted Kurt's senses.
He let out a shuddering breath and tore his eyes away from the table where they had been glued to. "Oh my goodness. Th-that was your sister?"
Liam's eyes were suspiciously dark as he nodded. "She told me all about your little experience. I just passed the information along to your leading man."
Kurt nodded numbly and looked up to the monologue clock on the wall. "I have to go. I have class and all." He rushed out and pushed himself out of the chair. Waving to Liam, he walked briskly out of the large room.
"I missed you this morning." Blaine smiled, dropping down besides Kurt in the senior commons where the boy was currently lounging and typing on his laptop.
"Me too." Kurt admitted softly, looking to his boyfriend and leaning over slightly, careful not to jostle his computer, and pecking him chastely on the lips.
"What were you doing?" He questioned airily, still wearing that charming, swoon worthy smile. Kurt swallowed the urge to roll his eyes as he heard the real meaning behind the question.
Did you have breakfast?
"I had breakfast with Liam." The younger boy told him, ignoring the way his eyebrows furrowed at the words.
Blaine nodded before bumping his shoulder playfully with his own. "What're you doing?" He asked, dragging out the syllable longer than necessary and sounding like a bored child.
"English paper. It's due next week, but I thought I would get an early start on it before I get buried alive with other assignments and you need a shovel to get me out." Kurt sighed, reluctantly willing his fingers to start typing again but not remembering what he had been saying before Blaine came.
"Well, I was doing an English paper," Kurt corrected himself and closed his laptop. "But it seems that you have effectively distracted me from completing my task. Well done, Mr. Anderson." He chuckled.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I guess you'll just have to give me your undivided attention now seeing as you have nothing else to do." He stated mockingly pitifully and shrugged.
Kurt playfully pouted, hiding his laugh. "I suppose you're right."
The older boy chuckled, his eyes sparkling and his dark eyelashes fluttering against his cheeks. He grabbed a hold of Kurt's soft hand, unknowingly sending tingles up his boyfriend's spine.
"Anyway, I came here because I have a proposition for you."
"You mean you didn't come just because you wanted to spend time with your talented and fashionable boyfriend? I have to admit, I'm wounded." Kurt grinned and squeezed the hand in his.
"Well, that too. I always want to spend time with you, but you have to stop distracting me and let me ask you my question."
Kurt nodded, biting his lip to keep from laughing at his boyfriend and motioned for him to speak.
"Okay." He took a deep breath and winked. "Kurt Hummel, will you do me the honor of going out with me on Friday night?" His eyes glinted with a sheen of hope and Kurt couldn't fathom a reason why Blaine would ever think he could reject him.
"Of course I will!" Kurt accepted and pulled Blaine to him once again, bringing their lips together briefly.
"Where are we going?" He asked Blaine after he pulled away, already mentally planning out possible outfits for different scenarios. The darker haired boy opened his mouth to tell him, but closed it when a ringing interrupted him.
"Sorry, it's my dad." Kurt told him, looking down at his phone and answering, holding out a hand to Blaine, telling him to wait a minute.
"Hello, dad." Kurt spoke into the phone, absent mindedly smoothing down his blazer.
"Hi there kiddo! How are you?" Burt's voice filtered loudly into Kurt's ear, causing him to wince and pull his phone slightly away. He sounded happily enthusiastic about something Kurt had yet to find out about.
"I'm fine." He said stonily, rolling his eyes at his knee, knowing full well what his dad was really asking.
Ever since Burt had found out, he had taken to calling Kurt twice a day, inquiring about how he was and what they had served today for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. He would have already snapped if it hadn't been for the fact that he really didn't have any reason to get mad.
As much as it annoyed him, and trust me, it did, it was his fault that his father had to call him so many times a day. He was already probably putting so much unnecessary stress on his heart and starting an argument over his worrying parent would just be stupid.
"What's up?" Kurt asked.
"I uh… I found a great place for you to go and uh, get help." He frowned and stood up, waving for Blaine to stay where he was when he started to get up with a confused look painting his features.
"Really?" He breathed out, squelching the desire to hang up and cry.
Now don't get me wrong, it wasn't that Kurt didn't want the help. No, he had already accepted that this was the best possible thing to do to help everyone and get out of this chaos, but it wasn't like he was going to be totally in love with the idea.
Kurt had always prided himself in being proud of who he was and what he did. His sexuality, his clothes, being in glee club, being bullied; he had always kept his head held high, but now with this, he couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed.
He was going to have to go to a place with strangers that he didn't know and talk about what he had done to people he had never seen in his life.
"Yeah, it's close to Westerville so you can drive there easily. It's even on Friday so you can go and then come home for the weekend after." His dad tried to sound optimistic about the whole thing, but when talking about his son having to go get help for hurting himself; it wasn't the easiest thing in the world.
"Wait, it's on Friday? Dad-"
"Nope, don't complain, Kurt. This was part of the deal. You are going to this thing then coming home for family dinner. If you want, I could just as easily pull you out of boarding and have you come live at home. Would you like that?" His tone gave no room for questioning and Kurt rubbed his eyes while letting out a sigh.
"No, no that's perfect dad." He leaned against a wall and listened to his dad's voice drone on and on about the great things about the clinic he had found.
His dad had ended the phone call after an obscene amount of questions about a minute ago. Kurt knew that he should go back inside and talk to Blaine about everything, but he really didn't want to face him right now.
He knew that Blaine had been looking forward to their date by the way his eyes shone matching the joyful expression that graced his features after he accepted. For as long as they had been together, the couple hadn't had anytime to actually go out on a date.
Thanks to the circumstances in which they had gotten together, more pressing and stressful matters had become the number one priority, putting dates and what not in the back seat. Now, the one time Blaine asked him out, he had to cancel for none other than the same reason they hadn't gone out in the first place.
Needless to say, he felt horrible about it and didn't want to see the way Blaine's face was going to morph into one of a sad puppy all because of him.
Sighing, Kurt pushed himself up off the wall he was leaning against and dragged his feet into the next room.
At the sound of footsteps, Blaine's head had shot up searching the room for Kurt. "What did your dad want?" He asked and patted the seat next to him for Kurt to take.
The taller boy frowned and gently sat down close to his significant other. "I am so sorry, Blaine." Kurt's eyes were filled with guilt and sadness and Blaine swallowed the lump in his throat that had formed at the expression.
"What's wrong?" He asked, grabbing Kurt's hand again and tilting his head forward, closer to Kurt's.
"My dad, he uh… he found an organization with counseling sessions and all that stuff f-for me." He hated the way the words came out in a sad whisper, stuttering over letters and stumbling over words. It made him feel weak, the way he couldn't even control how his sentences came out.
Blaine's lips turned up in a small smile. "That's great, Kurt." He told him, tilting his chin up with his finger and forcing him to look in his eyes. "This is good news." He assured him when he got a look at Kurt's frown on his pink lips.
To the older boy it was great news. For the longest time, all he wanted was for Kurt to get better. Sure, he had agreed to getting help before this point, but the fact that he actually knew what was happening and where he could go made everything more surreal.
It made his heart swell in his chest to think that Kurt would be healthy and okay in an undetermined amount of time.
He knew that this was a problem he would always have to struggle with for years to come after he stopped the nonsense, but right now, it felt like they were making real progress and Blaine couldn't be any happier.
His eyes met Kurt's downcast ones and he frowned. "Why are you so sad about it?" He asked, moving his hand from under his chin to cup his cheek lovingly. "You still want to get help, don't you?" Blaine questioned, his heart already sinking at the possibility of Kurt rebuking his previous notions and deciding to return to his problematic ways.
"Yes, of course I do." Kurt firmly confirmed. "It's just… it's on Fridays after Warbler rehearsal and then I have to drive home for the weekend and-"
"Kurt." Blaine spoke, cutting off his word flow. "Is that what you were worried about? Our date having to be rescheduled?"
The boy in question just nodded, his eyes searching the others face for any sign of disapproval or disappointment of any kind. Surprisingly, the only thing he did find was an expression of incredulity.
"That's ridiculous! Your well being comes before any date we might have, okay?" When Kurt nodded again, Blaine continued speaking. "Now, tell me about this place your dad found."
Kurt was silent for a moment as he looked around to the other boys in the room. Most of which had their heads stuck far in a book, a few others laughing with their friends. He turned back to Blaine, "Can we go talk about this in my dorm?"
In a second, Blaine was up off the couch and grabbing his books. "Let's be on our way then." He smiled and arm out for Kurt to take.
After putting his laptop away in his bag and slinging it on his shoulder, he took Blaine's offered limb with a shy smile and a rosy blush. The boys walked closely together through the halls, bumping shoulders and hips along the way.
The pair opened the door to find Trent, Kurt's roommate, rummaging around under his bed. Having heard the door open, he looked up to see the boys deposit their stuff on the desk and Kurt close the door behind him.
"Hey, Kurt. Blaine." He nodded to each one of them before turning back to Kurt. "Have you seen my bag?" He ran a hand through his hair out of stress.
"Check the bathroom." Kurt smiled, knowing full well how his roommate's items had a habit of ending up in weird places. While the frantic boy searched the bathroom, Kurt pulled Blaine to his bed to sit down.
"Thank you so much, Kurt. You are a life saver." Trent called out as he rushed out of the other room. "Anyway, I best be going, seeing as I'm already-" He paused to look down at his watch and his eyes widened comically at what he saw. "Twenty minutes late? Where does time go?" And with that, he was out the door running.
Silence followed after the door unintentionally slamming.
"I don't know a lot about it." Kurt admitted, breaking the quiet away and leaning back until he was looking up at the ceiling. "My dad just told me where it is and some basic information about the place."
Blaine flopped backwards on the bed so that their shoulders and arms were pressed flush against each other. "Like what?" He edged on.
"It's a group counseling session at the Westerville Recreational Hall." That was the extent of his knowledge about the place he would have to attend on Friday and it scared him. In this case, not knowing was definitely worse than knowing because now he couldn't even fully prepare himself for what he would be getting himself into.
The bed bounced along with Blaines nodding. "I used to swim there. The pool is heated and it has a diving board."
Kurt's lips turned up in a smile, thankful for the rare change of subject and chance he got to have a normal conversation for once. "Don't you have a pool at your house?"
"Yeah, but the one there is heated and I used to be afraid to swim so my mom signed me up for classes there." Blaine said sheepishly.
"Aww, I can just imagine little Blaine learning how to swim for the first time." Kurt cooed affectionately, moving his hand slightly to brush against the other males.
The darker haired boy grabbed and intertwined their hands. "I was twelve."
A giggle erupted through Kurt's lips before he knew it and Blaine couldn't help but smile at the most carefree sound he had heard from him in days. "It's not funny. I was terrified.'" He protested half-heartedly.
"Of what? Drowning in water that you could probably stand in?"
The older boy nudged the others shoulder with a scandalized gasp. "You are mean! I was a small child!"
"Oh yeah, you were probably still so small that the water would have gone over your head." He got out in between breathy laughs.
"Was that a stab at my height?"
"More like the lack of.'"
Blaine laughed along with Kurt, not finding it in himself to be the slightest bit offended. After a while, the giggles quieted to a little pant while Kurt tried to catch his breath.
"Can I take you there at least?" Blaine asked as he rolled onto his side so he could face his boyfriend.
The boy in question mimicked his action and found himself nose to nose with one Blaine Anderson. "Why?" He breathed. Of course he would want Blaine to go with him, but there was a small part of him that didn't want it.
Friday was going to be a mystery to Kurt and he didn't know how he would act. The last thing he wanted to do was lash out on Blaine like he tended to do in stressful situations.
"Because I want to be there for you. Because I want to support you and spend more time with you. Because I want to go see the old building and reminisce about the days I spent as a terrified pre-teen." His tone was somewhat playful, but his eyes were burning deeply with sincerity and a vast amount of hope.
Those eyes were undeniably his weak spot.
"Then I suppose you can escort me and act as my chauffer for the evening." He amended with a gracious smile that was kissed off his lips a moment later.
The day seemed to stretch out for an impossibly long time as every minute turned to an hour inside Kurt's mind.
On one hand he relished in the fact that he still had time before that counseling session tonight, but on the other he just wanted time to pass so he could get it over and done with. The sooner he went to the session, the sooner everybody would leave him alone, and the sooner his life could return to normal.
Every spare moment he got, his phone was in his hand checking the time to see if any significant amount of minutes had passed. Unfortunately he was always disappointed when it never happened.
It seemed as if everybody in the world knew exactly what was going on and where he was going. The glances seemed to be longer and the questions seemed to be even more suspicious and disbelieving than usual. Blaine had told him that he was paranoid and just anxious about that night, but Kurt wasn't sure.
Finally, the last bell of the day had rung signaling freedom for all of the Dalton Academy boys except Kurt Hummel.
Blaine seemed overly eager about the whole situation which was positively not making the situation any better. Starting the car, he had smiled at Kurt and told him that he shouldn't be nervous at all and things would be more than okay.
The doubts of those words were present in his mind, but Kurt didn't voice them. Instead, he smiled shakily at Blaine and rolled down his window a bit. Most of the ride was filled with humming along to the radio and silence, but neither boy minded, each lost in their own thoughts.
Kurt stared out the window and watched as each tree passed by, making him that much closer to the meeting with every inch. He knew he shouldn't feel sorry or scared for this because he had been the one to cause it in the first place, but right now his brain was too frazzled to control his thoughts.
It was just an hour.
One hour and then he would have the whole week to himself. He was a Hummel, he was strong and he knew that he could do this if he tried, but he wasn't sure if he really wanted to.
The car stopped and Blaine turned the key in the ignition until the car turned off. "This is it." He announced quietly.
"I gathered that." Kurt nodded in response, making no move whatsoever to open the door and get out of the car.
"What time are you supposed to be there?" He asked as he pulled out his phone to check the time. Kurt stole a glance and felt his stomach drop. "Now."
"Babe, I know this seems scary right now, but you got to do this. I just know it will help you and that's all I really want right now." He rubbed his hand along Kurt's arm before sliding up to his neck to pull his head down in for a kiss.
He sighed against the lips and nodded. "I love you."
"I love you, too." Blaine told him firmly as Kurt opened the door slowly and stepped out onto the pavement below his feet.
Kurt walked slowly and cautiously from the car, not wanting to get there any faster than he absolutely had to. He knew that Blaine was probably waiting until he got inside to drive away and that fact made him fight the urge to turn around and go home.
If he cried hard enough, Blaine was sure to give in and bring him back to Dalton, but Kurt knew that was selfish. He had to do this if not for himself then for his dad and Blaine.
His pale hand gripped the door handle tightly to stop the subtle shaking his hand had started. The door was heavy as he pulled it open and stepped through, glancing back one last time to see Blaine giving him a sad smile and a small wave.
As the door closed gently behind him, the skinny boy found himself wishing for something he knew he couldn't have. In that moment, the one thing he wanted most in the world was to go home and talk to his mom. She had always had the best advice, the best hugs, and understood him.
To just be held by her and helped by her was something Kurt would give anything for. She would've understood him if he told her about everything.
With a deep breath, he squeezed his eyes shut to clear his mind before he had to move any further.
The sign indicating which direction to take down the hallway was almost comical. Written in big bubble letters and decorated with bright and happy colors, the sign looked like something Brittany would make. It looked just about as out of place as he felt.
Moving on before he could get anymore attached to the ridiculous poster, Kurt arrived in front of what appeared to be the final barrier between him and his new reality. He could see through the little window a group of chars set up, some filled and some vacant and from what he could tell: he was probably the only boy.
Before the pity and sadness could overwhelm him with that situation, he swallowed the nonexistent spit in his parched mouth and pushed on the handle. The creaky door sounded like a gun shot to his perked ears and he slipped through the opening he created to avoid having to open the door anymore, but the sound was enough. Everybody had already looked up and noticed his arrival.
There were six sets of eyes, all looking, all knowing, all watching.
An older woman was the first to break the silence that he had been all too aware of. "Hello there! Come on in, you're just in time." She motioned for the girl she had been talking to before he had come in to take a seat and looked over to Kurt who shuffled over to an empty seat in the corner.
The woman in the front clapped her hands together with a small smile. "Hi everyone. As most of you know, my name is Cindy and I'm your counselor for this evening. Like every other time before, I want to just go around and have everyone introduce themselves and share a little bit if they would like."
Kurt looked over to the right where a table stood covered in a salmon plastic pink table cloth and plates of cookies and chips. It wasn't surprising that the joke of a table was untouched. That was like putting a keg in the middle of an Alcohol Anonymous meeting. No logic whatsoever.
He turned his attention back to the young girl who was speaking at the moment.
"You guys can call me Lana and I'm here because my parents think I have a problem." She rasped out and crossed her bony arms over her visible ribs.
The brunette briefly recognized Cindy and Lana speaking as he inwardly scoffed.
Surely I am not as bad as these girls here. This place is a fucking joke.
It wasn't until someone cleared their throats that he realized the few people were staring towards him expectantly. His mouth worked faster than his brain as he found himself speaking words he hadn't planned on. "I'm Kurt Hummel and this is my first time coming to one of these meetings."
"It's great to have you, Kurt." Cindy hooked her thick hair between her big ears and smiled. "Why don't you tell us a little bit about why you're here?"
"Well, I'm just going to take a guess, but I'm pretty sure everybody is here for the same thing." He snipped, crossing his legs and sliding his butt back against the seat so he was sitting taller. Maybe it wasn't the nicest thing to say and act his first time here, but he didn't know how else to deal with this.
It wasn't like he was going to just start weeping and confessing his inner most feelings to a group of girls he had known for a total of ten minutes. Not going to happen.
Cindy's smile never faltered. "Girls, why don't you take out your journals why I go talk to Kurt here and get him started out with everything?" Her voice sounded nice enough, but it was one of those that you just knew would get tiring after a while and Kurt was not looking forward to that.
She smoothed the back of her long skirt before sitting in the seat next to him and crossing her ankles. "I know that this is really hard, the first time always is, but nothing will get better if you don't try and help it." The words sounded overused but sincere all the same and Kurt turned his head to face the red head better.
"Can you tell me how you ended up here?" She asked while not so subtly scooting her chair and inch closer to his.
"The same as everyone else." Kurt stated coldly. "I have… problems with eating apparently and now I'm here."
Her hair fell in front of her eyes as she nodded and Kurt found himself thinking of all the different styles he could cut it into. His mind was desperately searching for anything to use as a distraction. "You say it like it's not a big deal." She observed.
And this was the part he had been dreading.
Now came the analyzing of the words he said and the solutions to his problems because he supposedly wasn't capable of handling it on his own. Now it was time for Cindy to look at him like a broken little toy that she needed to tape together and fix all of the issues he had.
"And that would be because it isn't." He said breezily, picking a piece of imaginary lint off of his always impeccable shirt.
"That's where you are wrong." Her tone reprimanded gently. "You look like you're into fashion and care about your appearances, am I right?"
He nodded, not bothering to dignify her with an answer as he hadn't any idea where she had planned to take that line of questioning. Not to mention the question was just stupid. If he didn't care about his appearance than he wouldn't have ended up in that room.
"Did you know that you are risking losing your hair and ruining your teeth by doing this to yourself? You see that girl in the front?" She pointed to the back of a head belonging to a blonde in the front row. "Her hair is falling out."
"I appreciate your concern," No I don't. "But I don't have to worry about that anymore seeing as I've already started eating again. I'm only here to please my parents and boyfriend." He continued to stare ahead at the poor blonde's head of thinning hair.
Cindy sighed before reaching down and picking up and standard black and white composition notebook. "This is your journal, Kurt. From now on I want you to write everything you eat down in here along with the number of calories it had. You can also write about your day and/or experiences, but it's not required." She handed him the notebook before continuing on.
"You're allowed to bring someone along with you each meeting if you would like. If you're not writing in your journal or I find that you're lying then I'll call your dad and talk to him about the issue." Pausing for a moment, she patted his knee. "I know it may not seem like it right now, but I really am just trying to help you sort through this and show you that you aren't alone in your struggles."
Once the hour was up and Cindy reluctantly told everyone to wrap up what they were doing, Kurt booked it out of the place leaving the girls and the untouched table full of food in the dust.
He had survived it and although he wasn't remotely happy about having to write down what he wrote in the notebook he had been gifted, he was proud of himself and was sure that everyone else would be too.
Blaine's car was sitting in the same spot that he had been dropped off at and Kurt excitedly made his way to the car so he could show him that he was in fact trying to get better. Hopefully things could start on their journey to getting back to normal.
"Hi." Kurt greeted airily as he closed the car door behind him and leaned over to peck Blaine's cheek.
"Hey, how was it?" He asked, pleasantly surprised at the mood Kurt seemed to be in.
The taller boy buckled his seat belt and placed the notebook in his lap. "It wasn't fun, but I'm proud of myself for doing it."
"So am I." Blaine told him genuinely and started the car. "What's that in your lap? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think you had that when you went in."
Kurt nodded slowly, looking down to the object in his lap. That was his least favorite part of this whole set up. "Yeah, I'm supposed to write down everything that I eat and all the calories which is probably not going to happen."
Getting himself to swallow mouthfuls of food was torture to him. Having Blaine's eyes on him whenever he ate made him feel self-conscious. Writing down everything he ate was not going to help him. It was going to remind him of how much he had eaten that week and how much of his life would just be easier if he got rid of it. Recording the calories and reminding him of how much fat he was putting in his body was surely not going to help his problems.
"Why not? I think it sounds like a really good idea!" Blaine argued, breaking away at his thoughts.
Kurt shrugged. "I just don't see the point." He half-lied. "How is this supposed to make me… better?"
The raven haired boy was silent for a moment before answering. "I have to make a stop on the way back to Lima, okay?"
He nodded in affirmation, confused but nonetheless grateful that Blaine had seemingly dropped the issue and trusted him enough to let him do this and make decisions on his own.
They pulled into a small parking lot before Blaine told him that he would be back in a minute and got out of the car, leaving the keys in so he could listen to the radio. While he was gone, he sent a quick text to his dad telling him that he was on his way home and that he would tell him about his day when he got there. By the time Burt had replied, Blaine was pulling the door open and settling back in the seat, this time accompanied by a plastic shopping bag.
"What is that?" Kurt questioned, grabbing the bag and pulling it to him before Blaine could even find the words to protest his action. Pulling the crinkly and noisy bag away, he found a notebook similar to the one that sat in his lap from his session. "What-?"
"I just thought that maybe we could, you know… do the whole journal thing together. I know you didn't want to, but I thought that if I did it too you might be more comfortable and willing, but it's-"
Kurt silenced his rambling with a hard kiss.
"I love you so much." He told him. "You are the sweetest and most amazing person on this planet and I am so lucky to be able to do this." He finished as he brushed his lips against Blaine's again, this time lingering a little longer.
"So you like it?" He eagerly asked. "Does this mean you're going to do it?"
Kurt nodded. "I love it and I love that you did this for me. Now, let's get home."
I'm back! Does anyone even remember this story?
I finally found my muse again and hopefully I'll start updating again. I have just had the biggest and ugliest case of writers block, but it's sort of gone. Not completely, seeing as I had to force myself to keep writing some of these parts, but it's done. Hopefully it's not too bad and hopefully no one hates me.
I also want to thank every single one of you who had reviewed, messaged me, alerted, and favorited this story. You guys are literally what made me keep from giving up on this and I love you guys.