Warnings: Smut, historical inaccuracies, other character, manly crying, and not much dialogue.

A/n: The first 3 paragraphs may not match up with the rest of it but I just needed to include what Jeremy was thinking, but I also wanted to tell you guys what happened after they left the Grill.


Jeremy's fingers idly ran over Damon's dog tags. They were silver, old. His boyfriend's name printed in the metal. They reminded Jeremy sometimes of how old Damon was. Damon so old that he partook in a war during the mid 1800s, still having the very tags they would have used to identify his body if needed. It made Jeremy all that more grateful that Damon hadn't needed them during his time serving. At the risk of sounding as girly as his sister, he couldn't think of what it would have been like to have never met Damon Salvatore. He'd be lying if he said that things had always been rosy and wonderful with the vampire. Hell, the night everything between him and Damon started was probably one of the scariest nights of his life. By no means had Damon always been his favorite person, but at any rate, he was now. And for that reason, Jeremy didn't like to think about all of the times Damon could have very well died before gaining his vampiric immortality.

However, Jeremy still wondered about it sometimes. It was something he had never asked Damon before. When he thought about it, he didn't know that much about the man. He knew he loved him, and that Damon returned it. He knew that Damon was no saint and he also knew that Damon had some good in himself. But truth be told, he didn't have any idea what Damon was like before he was turned. Sometimes Jeremy was afraid to ask, he didn't want to dredge up any of Damon's old feelings that he may have had. Feelings not particularly of Katherine but just of his old feelings in general, because Jeremy still remembered from that first night what Damon had said in the peace of the darkness, that he missed his humanity. He didn't want to see any trace of sadness in Damon's beautiful blue eyes, but still – Jeremy often was curious to know about Damon's previous life.

So because of his recent curiosity, Jeremy had planned on asking Damon about his life as a human; perhaps more specifically his time during the war. He figured it'd be an easy place to start, then maybe ease his way into the life Damon had after he became a vampire; his life that recently Jeremy had become such a significant part of.

They had been to the Grill earlier that day. It was when Damon had acted funnier than usual. Jeremy had asked him about it but after Damon smiled at him Jeremy was temporarily put at ease. He figured if Damon had something to tell him, he'd do it in his own time.

Afterwards the two of them headed back to Damon's, relieved to find that the house was empty. Once there Jeremy had made good of the promise he'd given to Damon, the one he'd made silently when he massaged Damon's thigh with his wandering foot underneath the table. He hadn't realized just exactly what it was that he stirred inside of Damon because once he was able to, the vampire nearly attacked Jeremy full force. The younger male found his legs wrapped around Damon's waist as the vampire carried him to his bedroom, his mouth being ravished in the meantime. At one point Jeremy was pressed up against a wall with Damon crowding him, thrusting his tongue inside the younger one's mouth. Lips soft and eager had collided in a frenzy of heat and fervor, mouths already at the open waiting for tongues to slide across each other eliciting moans from both men.

The noise of their kisses and moans filled the house as the two made their way. When finally Damon brought them both to his bedroom he laid Jeremy down gently, his body still clinging to the stronger man's torso. At the Grill Jeremy had hoped for being the dominant one this time (Damon was sweet of him to let Jeremy play the dominant one from time to time, only because he liked being man-handled by Jeremy…shh!) But not now, no – Damon held Jeremy's body so close to him; he dominated the living man out of pure animalistic lust. Thankfully Damon had lent Jeremy his own jeans because the pants Jeremy had been wearing were now torn past visible recognition. Jeremy wondered how in the hell that even happened without Damon mauling his legs in the process. It was as if there were two sides to Damon, the side that was gentle with Jeremy, treating him almost like glass and then this one, the one so desperate to be inside of Jeremy but still held back from hurting him – that, he would never do.

Jeremy kissed Damon's perfect, ivory face. He ran his tongue down Damon's skin, trailing to his jaw where he sucked from there to his neck. It was the only time Damon had slowed down his anxious movements to rid him and Jeremy of their clothes. Damon hovered above Jeremy as he let his human slowly take the control he was desperate for. Jeremy's hands came up and finished removing Damon's shirt that was half way off his body. He made sure to run his warm fingers over Damon's chest, teasing his nipples and gliding his hands down Damon's abs. Jeremy leaned up and sucked on Damon's left nipple, teased it with his tongue the way he knew made Damon's toes curl.

"Jeremy," Damon moaned roughly, his voice thick with lust and arousal.
The way Damon pleaded made Jeremy hum.

Jeremy pushed Damon back so that his legs were resting on either side of Jeremy's body, giving him enough room to remove the shirt he had lent him. Damon took his time taking off the tie, at the moment all he wanted was for the two of them to be naked rutting against each other but there was something about that fucking tie. He really did love it when Jeremy wore them, and the fact that it was his own nearly made him come the minute he put it on his boyfriend's pale, perfect neck; perhaps it was Damon's own way of branding the younger male. No matter the reason, Damon figured he could read into his possessiveness another time, all that matter now was that he have Jeremy in every physical way he could imagine.

Now, with the two of them both naked and already panting, Jeremy leaned up and kissed Damon's lips. His kisses were light, he trailed them downward to Damon's chin and lower to his neck; feeling the vibration on his lips from the movement of Damon's skin from how he growled at the contact of Jeremy's lips on his throat.

Their cocks rubbing relentlessly against each other, Damon helped the friction right along as he grinded down even harder. Jeremy hissed from the feeling, his gut tightening and his dick filling more and more with blood. He thought he was going to burst when he saw Damon suck in two of his own fingers between his perfect lips and into his mouth. Jeremy envisioned those rosy lips around his swollen, aching member, but reasoned that that could wait; all he wanted right now was for Damon to be inside of him, to claim him the way he knew Damon loved to do.

The room was filled with pleased yet hungry moans as Jeremy was penetrated by the first finger, then the second. The noises he was making were purely pornographic, as if Damon wasn't already excruciatingly hard.

Both men shifted, Damon slipped securely between Jeremy's legs as the younger male wrapped them tightly around Damon's torso. The raven haired hell on wheels swooped down for another kiss as he made his way inside Jeremy's taut, scorching entrance.

Had Damon been human, had he not have had nearly a century of practice, he was sure he would have lost all control right then and there as Jeremy clutched his naked shoulder blades and moaned so dirtily that the Pope himself would have probably questioned his sexuality. Jeremy could do wonders with his mouth and making the filthiest of noises was one of his most special talents. As Jeremy's heels dug into Damon's ass Damon thrust into the warm body harder and deeper. Normally Damon liked to take his time with Jeremy. Feel his body out. Make him squirm before he plunged all the way in with torturous pace he knew Jeremy loved. But not now. Something inside of Damon wanted to come out and play, wanted to be inside of Jeremy so much, make the young human never forget what it was like to have Damon atop of him.

And from the claws digging in his back and the song of whimpers and moans Jeremy was letting out, Damon knew Jeremy loved it.

Damon took Jeremy's hands into his own and twined their fingers together as he pinned them down on the bed. His hips slowing down as he took the time to take Jeremy apart piece by piece. Their lips found each other in the darkened room. Tongues glided softly against one another. It was as if the mood took a 180 in an instant. Damon went from erratically having his way with Jeremy, pleasing the human with raw vigor, to sensually worshipping his body. Damon's hands were everywhere all at once after he let go of Jeremy's hands. They were stroking Jeremy's hair, then teasing his nipples, and finally journeyed their way to Jeremy's pulsing cock. He tugged and petted it as he kissed Jeremy's opened mouth. It was bitter sweet because as much as he loved his boyfriend's lips and his sinful tongue, quieting Jeremy and ceasing his pants and moans was almost painful.

Languidly Jeremy ran his hands up and down Damon's warm back, going further south to grasp his firm end. He whimpered softly as the kisses stopped but smiled against Damon's neck as he heard his boyfriend whisper 'I love you' in the dark.

With that combined with the deep thrusts and Damon's grip around his penis, Jeremy came over their bellies. As Damon felt it he sped up his movements, taking all Jeremy was worth and giving it back to him through kisses and moans, he could feel his orgasm taking over his body. In the heat of the moment Damon's fangs elongated and sank effortlessly in Jeremy's pliable neck.

As blood was drawn from his throat Jeremy let out another string of moans, whimpers, and Damon's name in hushed whispers.

As if it were a feast Damon lapped at Jeremy's neck until all the excess blood was gone and hickeys were quickly forming. Damon thought about giving Jeremy his blood. He loved it when he saw Jeremy's lips suckle his skin, drinking his blood like candy. But he thought against it. As he stared at the fang marks and the rest of the marks on Jeremy's neck and chest Damon decided he wanted to leave them there. Of course his bite mark was placed too low for the world to see but what was left on Jeremy's neck wasn't. And Damon wanted people to see the younger man's neck all marked up, all claimed and proud.

The vampire withdrew himself from Jeremy's sated body and gave him another kiss on the lips.

"Well? Was it as good as I promised?" Jeremy slurred as he kissed back lazily.

All Damon did was laugh softly and take hold of his hand.

After that the two of them eventually found themselves lying practically on top of each other as they slept. It was in that position that Jeremy woke up hours later. He found that Damon's body had migrated lower against Jeremy's body; his head resting on the younger's stomach.

Since Jeremy didn't want to wake Damon up he settled on gently carding his fingers through Damon's raven hair. After a while Jeremy began looking around the room. It was simple and elegant with a wisp of mystery. Next to the bed was a dresser made of dark oak and a sleek finish. Out of curiosity and a little boredom Jeremy reached for the top drawer, opened it, and was a little surprised to find Damon's dog tags buried haphazardly among his clothes.

And that was how Jeremy ended up in how he was now. With one of his hands caressing Damon and the other running over the silver plated 'Salvatore'. It was what made him think of the life Damon had before he met Jeremy.

He was pulled from his thoughts by the noises Damon was making as he woke up on top of Jeremy.

"Hey baby," Jeremy said as he smiled down at him. He was sure that he'd be been punished with no sex for a week if he ever told anyone but when Damon first wakes up he looks so adorable. His blue eyes are cloudy and hooded from sleep, his hair is mussed and tousled in the sexiest way, and the way his body stretches… well, that's not adorable as much as it is sexy.

"Hi", he said sleepily. He kissed Jeremy's smooth stomach and nibbled his abs gently.
It took him a moment to fully wake up before he noticed what was in his lover's hands.

And just like that, it was like a bucket of ice water was thrown onto his naked body.

All of his memories came rushing back.

Flashback, 1867

He could hear gunshots. They were all around him yet at that point the noises began to almost become mute. He couldn't breathe. Fear choking him, his body unable to process whether it wanted to take flight or fight. He was taught never to leave a man behind. Never abandon your own. He couldn't do that. Even though his fellow men needed him to fight with them, needed him to cover for them, he found himself fleeing. He swore he'd never leave, he'd never run away. But this time it felt like he had no choice. He was missing someone. How, he wasn't sure. Damon thought he was with him the entire time but when he looked behind him his heart sank. He was nowhere to be found. So in the midst of gun shots and weaponry flying all around them, Damon ran back to where they came from. He wasn't in his right mind anymore. He had to find him; get to him before it was too late.

And that's what he did.

Damon was smart though. He avoided the most dangerous zones if possible. He was thorough in his search yet quick at the same time. He had to keep moving. He had to cover as much ground as he could. A steady target was an easy target and the more time he spent the more likely he could be too late. But he didn't want to be careless. Didn't want to overlook anything in case he didn't see him.

Through the clouds of dust and gunfire Damon kept his eyes peeled for sandy blond hair, for eyes greener than the earth, for the body he was so familiar with. Even in uniform Damon would still know him from anyone else. It's what happened when you spent so much time with someone. He wanted to find him so desperately that Damon swore he developed a sixth sense in that brief period.

Something told him he was close. He could feel it. And after further voyage he could hear it. He could hear the man's voice over all of the chaos. Pained moans and his strained voice were so close to Damon that he knew he was almost there.

In the ground there were holes dug so that soldiers could fit into them, could hide if necessary. Because of all that was going on and how deep the holes were you'd completely look over a body lying there if you weren't looking for it. Luckily Damon was. He scoured the dug up earth, looked and listened for him.

When Damon saw a helmet lay a few meters away from a hole he became frantic. Looked for lightly colored hair and finally, finally he found what he was looking for. May it be a gift from God or sheer determination Damon wasn't sure, but he had found him.

Without even thinking about further Damon dove in. He checked the body, made sure to whom it was. When watery green eyes looked up at him Damon could finally breathe again. He took his dirt covered hand cradled the man's face.

"What happened?" He asked.

The only response he got was more moans of pain. He could see the man lose consciousness. So Damon did the only thing he knew to do. He picked up the limp body, swung it over himself to carry it more efficiently and took off to where he found an abandoned, secluded shack on his way to finding the man now in his arms. Damon had checked beforehand if the man was in it and found that it was completely empty, it was a wonder Damon even found it himself.

Even though his muscles burned and feet ached Damon didn't care. He pushed through the pain and strode the distance until he got to the safest place he could think of. When he did he put the man down as gently as possible. Damon did his best to secure the place, no matter how futile he knew his efforts would be if someone really wanted entrance. When he got back to the still breathing body he was relieved to find open eyes still looking at him.

As bittersweet as it was, Damon allowed himself to smile.

"I thought I'd lost you," he whispered to the man as he began checking his body for injuries.

Surprisingly all Damon found was smeared blood, scrapes and deep scratches, bruises already appearing, and swollen limbs. That isn't to say these injuries didn't matter, it was just that Damon had expected the worst. He thanked whatever deity was out there that his suspicions weren't true.

Damon fished for the container of water he had clipped to his bottoms and started giving the man whatever drop of water he had. After the man nearly choked on it from the new sensation he finally tried to speak.

"Yu 'lrigh?" He slurred, his green eyes scanning Damon's body to make sure he was okay.

Damon laughed humorlessly. "I'm fine. It was you I was worried about."
"How did I lose you?" Damon let the shame overcome him. He couldn't even protect the man before him, couldn't manage not to lose him. What does that say about him?

The man who was lying on the ground, head supported by Damon's lap reached for Damon's hands. He needed to touch Damon, know that he was there. As quickly as desired Damon let his hands be held; he tangled his fingers with that of the other man's.

"It's not your fault." The man said roughly, as if he knew what Damon was thinking.

Damon could feel his cheeks begin to dampen. "But I lost you," he said brokenly.

The man in his arms smiled the best he could while his body was still so sore.
"You found me," he said proudly. He didn't think he'd ever be found. He thought he was going to die in that hole. He had hoped Damon would find him but all he prayed for was that Damon was okay. After he had accepted his fate that's all he hoped for, was that Damon would survive.

He didn't know if he should or not but Damon couldn't stop himself. He leaned down all the way to the man's lips and kissed him softly. He could feel the tears on the other man's face along with his own. When Damon felt the other man apply gentle pressure to his lips Damon's body sagged. He clutched the weak body for dear life, vowing to never lose sight of him again.

Flashback, over

"Where'd you get that?" He questioned, his voice going darker as his eyes zeroed in on the metal Jeremy was holding onto.

"From your dresser. I've never seen these before."




Damon blinked at Jeremy. He didn't need any other evidence. He was sure of it now. He knew, 100% certain that what he smelt in The Grill was what he had thought it was. Was who he had thought it was. He needed those memories to be sure; for his sense memory to be reminded that there was no way he could ever forget that scent, no matter the fact that he was only human when he was last exposed to it. And despite the part of him that refused to believe it, he knew that logically he wasn't wrong.

He was in that restaurant with them.

He was there right where Damon was just hours ago.

Gabriel was alive. And he was in Mystic Falls.


I promise this is still Jeremy/Damon, and I'm also SO sorry that it looked like I abandoned ship. I promise to try and keep writing this as frequently as I can. I would love it if you guys (if I still have any reviewers left) would tell me how you like the flashbacks. Should I stop doing them and get straight to the present?