Thank you very much for all of your wonderful reviews, faves, and alerts. They're so uplifting. In this chapter, you'll meet a few more friends and find out whether or not Jasper has decided to allow his testicles to descend again.

I apologize for the delay in updating. I've been trying to post this chapter since Friday, but to no avail due to issues with this site. I'm generally very prompt with my updates so it's upsetting to me too.

This story is AU/OOC/OTT.

All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer. No copyright infringement intended.

Mature readers 18+ only please.

Peter's POV

Damn! Oh, hell yeah! Oh my God! I feel like a fucking teenager who just had a live Playboy centerfold thrown naked in his midst. It's been three weeks since Bella woke up and I've been fucking her everyday. In fact, we haven't left this bed in four days. We can't seem to get enough of each other.

"More, Peter, more! Harder!" My mate commanded.

I currently had Bella's hands over her head and tied onto the bed frame. I was pounding into her relentlessly. We were both moaning in pleasure with each thrust I impaled on her sweet pussy.

"Oh God! Peter! Peterrr! Peterrrr! I'm c...c...cummingggg!" Her walls slammed down on my cock just as I released my load deep inside of her. I grabbed her and sunk my teeth straight into her neck, marking her as mine. It was an action I had repeated time and time again in the past three weeks. Bella was my bonded mate and she was mine and mine alone. I was a possessive fucker—well, not so much with my ex-wife—come to think of it. I never marked Char, but with Bella definitely—I marked her whenever I could.

"I love you, Bella." I said as I reluctantly withdrew my cock from her. I don't know when it happened, but over the last three weeks, we had gotten to know each other and fallen in love. She was my world. We had no secrets from each other—she knew everything about me and I knew everything about her.

"I love you, too, Peter." She replied. I kissed her passionately on the lips.

"I love you, too, Peter!" A familiar voice called from outside my house. "Are you gonna let me in, or what?"

I got up off of the bed. The bed thumped to the ground. I, quickly, got dressed and opened the door for my visitor. "Garrett, you fucker! What are you doing here?"

"I thought I'd come to see how my best friend is faring. I can smell that you're doing fine." He sniffed the air around me and grinned. "She smells delicious. Do I get to meet her?"

"Uh, yeah, come on in." I had Garrett follow me into the bedroom and did the introductions. "Garrett—meet my mate, Isabella Marie Swan. Bella this is Garrett Adams, attorney at law and best damn friend a vampire could ask for."

"Hello." Bella said, politely. "It's a pleasure to meet you Garrett."

"I believe the pleasure is definitely all mine." Garrett said. "Absolutely breathtaking."

It was then that I noticed that Bella was still tied to the bed—naked and spread eagled with my jizz running down her inner thighs. I looked over at Garrett and he couldn't take his eyes off of her. He was completely mesmerized.

"Fucker! You have your own mate to eye fuck! Get the hell out of my room so I can untie my mate!" I yelled. That shit didn't sound right at all.

Garrett smirked at me and left the bedroom. I untied Bella, then apologized for leaving her in that position. She took it all in stride and got dressed. "We need a new bed Peter." Bella whispered, looking at the crumpled heap on the floor.

Yeah, we definitely need a new bed. I think I'll purchase an extra one as back up.

"So, Garrett. What brings you here?" I asked. "Where's your mate?"

"She'll be here soon. She dropped me off and ran back down to Walmart. She forgot to pack my socks. I'll tell you one thing, she'll be happy to see you finally mated. She was worried about you after what that doxy did to you." Garrett replied.

Bella started giggling uncontrollably. "Why are you laughing, beautiful?" Garrett asked.

"I just didn't think anyone used the term doxy anymore." She chuckled.

"Forgive me, I was changed in the eighteenth century. How about strumpet? Is that better?"

"Whore or slut will suffice."

"Okay, we'll go with whore then."

"Who the fuck are you calling a whore?" A tinkling voice attached to a beautiful woman asked.

"Ah...it's my wife. Heidi, this is Bella. Peter's finally found his mate." Garrett introduced the two women.

"Finally." Heidi sighed in relief. She eyed Bella with scrutiny.

"Do you have a vision problem?" Bella asked, sarcastically.

Heidi looked up at her with narrowed eyes which Bella promptly returned with a smirk.

"I like her." Heidi declared and pulled a stunned Bella into a hug. "You and I are going to be great friends, I know already!"

"You're not a seer, are you?" Well, that's a strange question from my mate.

"No, why?"

"Oh, it's just that when I first met the psycho elf—those were the exact same lines that she said to me." Bella explained.

"By psycho elf, I'm assuming you mean Alice Cullen?" Heidi asked.

"Bella's had dealings with the Cullens before. Make yourselves at home and I'll tell you all about it." I motioned to the sofa so they could get comfortable.

We chatted for a couple of hours about how we met and fell in love. Then we went over Bella's history with the Cullens. Heidi and Garrett were seething. Garrett actually had to go cull a few trees in the forest. I told him to cull some oak because I needed firewood. He came back lugging a huge uprooted oak tree which he splintered into firewood for me with his bare hand. Gotta love vampirism—it comes in handy sometimes.

"So, what's your beef with the Cullens?" Bella asked Garrett.

"It's not my beef exactly, but how my mate was treated. Heidi used to be with the Volturi. She was their angler. She'd lure innocent prey into the castle as meals for the kings and the guards."

Heidi interrupted. "I'm not proud of the role I once had, but it was something that I had to do. Back then, it was like conscripted service with the Volturi. I was forced into doing something that I hated. Around eight years ago, they enacted a new law stating that guard service was voluntary and many of us were able to leave. They were able to attract many more talented vampires that way. They run the guard similar to the US Military in which you sign on for a set amount of time and get compensated for your services. In the Volturi's case, one tour amounts to a hundred years, which is nothing for vampires. I took the opportunity to leave though."

"I visited my former friend, Carlisle Cullen, after Heidi and I were married and mated. The women in the household treated her like dirt. We overheard some of the women talking about how Heidi was nothing more than a common whore because of her previous job with the Volturi. I took my wife home with me after hearing that." Garrett told Bella.

"Oh my fuck! Those little turds. Who made them judge and jury? Most of them are lazy sacks of shit who do nothing to better themselves. Those...ugh...which gynandromorphic piss ass little bitch was it?"

God, I love her dirty, little mouth. I think I should give it a good cleansing with my cock later.

Heidi, Garrett, and I all started laughing. Bella looked so cute with her nose all scrunched up and her hands on her hips. Her lips were in a big ol' pout. Is it wrong that I have a sudden urge to devour those lips?

"I believe it was the one you referred to as psycho elf speaking at the time. She was talking to Charlotte who pointed out that Carlisle Cullen said that I was nothing, but a Volturi trollop. This coming from the queen of whores herself." Heidi replied. "What the hell does gynandromorphic mean?"

"A gynandromorph is an organism that contains both male and female characteristics." Bella defined for her.

"Bella's a school teacher." I said, proudly.

"Oh, really? You aren't tempted to eat your students? Those runts would bug the fuck out of me. The person who invented those things should be shot." Heidi had a distasteful look on her face.

"Um, I don't know. I haven't taught since becoming a vampire and you've got to meet Vicky. I have a feeling that you two will get along just fine."

Somehow I just knew they'd get along too. "Yoohoo!" Speak of the devil. They're here.

The four of us went outside to greet the newcomers. They had rented a moving truck and were towing Riley's Chevy Silverado. Riley, Vicky, and Bree stepped out of the truck and engulfed us in hugs. Introductions were made and we all settled into the living room to talk.

We explained how we all knew each other and soon the whiskey was flowing and we were all having a good ol' time.

Nine pm soon rolled around and we all sat down to watch our favorite show, True Blood. Apparently, Garrett and Heidi were huge fans too. I must have been living under a rock cause it seemed like I was the only one that knew nothing of the show until I met Bella.

When the show ended, we sat around and talked some more. Garrett said he'd update their documents for them at no charge. He only does that for people he likes. The women were all getting along great—they were all down to earth and definitely on the naughty side.

Heidi wanted to go dancing tomorrow night, but I reminded her that Bella was still a newborn. "I keep forgetting because she's so controlled." Heidi remarked.

We were downing whiskey by the bottle and laughing away when my doorbell rang. By now, it was past eleven pm. Garrett, Riley, and I went to answer it—telling the women to stay put in the living room.

We opened the door to find a vampire that I hadn't seen in years standing on the doorstep with two large duffel bags—one in each hand.

"How can I help you, Jasper?" I asked.

"I need a place to stay." He said, simply.

"Come on in, there's enough room. There are others here, though, I'm just warning you." I said.

"Hello, Jasper." Garrett greeted him. Jasper acknowledged him with a nod.

"Jasper, this is my friend, Riley Biers. He'll be living in the other house on my property with his mate and his maker." I said.

Riley extended his hand out for Jasper to shake. I welcomed him inside, shut the door, and we all entered the living room. His eyes bulged at the sight of Bella and Victoria.

"Peter, can I talk to you for a minute?" Jasper scowled. He motioned for me to go outside. I followed him out.

"What is it?" I may have been a little short with him because I was pissed off about how he sided with his family the last time I saw them.

"The two women there—Victoria and Bella, they need to go." He said. "I know them from Forks. I promised Edward that I wouldn't contact Bella again."

"No, they don't have to leave. One's my mate and the other's her best friend. If you're not comfortable with them then you can just march your vegetarian, Armani suit wearing ass on out of here. I never made any sort of promise to Edward Cullen." I told him, angrily. "This is my home. You don't have the fucking right to come in here and tell me who I can and can't have here."

Jasper looked shocked at my response. Frankly, I was pissed off. He had some fucking nerve showing up all of a sudden after he, more or less, threw me out on my ass when I was at one of the lowest points in my existence just because he now had no place to go. I left him standing on the front porch and made my way back in the house.

I joined my group of friends in the house and we continued our revelries where we left off before Mr. Emotional decided to show up and interrupt. I pulled Bella onto my lap and cuddled her. I needed to feel close to her at the moment. She sensed this and snuggled into my chest.

Jasper trudged back inside and sat in a chair in the far corner. He observed our interactions with scrutiny. "I'm curious." He said, looking at Bella. "How did all of this come about? The last thing I remember, Bella, you broke up with Edward and told him that you didn't want anything to do with our world anymore because I nearly took a bite out of you. Alice told me that you were jumping up for joy when we left. Now, all of a sudden, you're a vampire?"

"I think you've been lied to, Jasper. Edward broke up with me in the forest saying that he wanted to keep me human, that he never loved me, and that my human mind was like a sieve and that I'd soon forget about him. Then, he abandoned me there. I got lost looking for him, got hypothermia, and landed in the hospital for two days because of it."

I felt a sudden surge of anger. The fucking empath was projecting. "Excuse me." Jasper growled.

"Oak trees in the back about three miles. They need firewood!" Garrett yelled.

A few minutes later, I heard the clatter of wood being dropped into a pile then Jasper came back inside. "Bella, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I nearly took a bite out of you. I lack control, I'm weak."

"You're not weak, you're a fucking idiot!" Victoria amonished. "You need to stop denying yourself your natural food source. Part of the reason why you guys have such uncontrolled bloodlust is because you're never fully satisfied. You'd think someone with as much military prowess as you supposedly have would have a little more up in the noggin, but, fuck, you're stupid."

"You'll have to excuse, Vicky. She has a tendency to run her mouth." Bella told Jasper.

Heidi decided to make nice and talk to him. "So, what brings you to Pennsylvania, Jasper? Where's your mate?"

Jasper looked up and sighed. "Turns out she's not my mate. Her mate's name is Jacques Branleur."

Heidi started guffawing. We looked at her quizzically. "Sorry guys, it's his name. Jacques is the equivalent of James in English, but his last name Branleur—it translates to Wanker."

We all started laughing. Bella and Vicky especially couldn't stop giggling.

"I think all guys named James are wankers!" Vicky shouted out. That got Jasper cracking up, too.

"The nomad who bit me in Phoenix—Vicky's shithole ex, his name was James too." Bella explained.

"So, Jasper, why are you really here?" I figured it would be a good time to ask since he seemed to have loosened up a bit.

"They kicked me out of the family. Basically, Char, Edward, Alice, and Carlisle all said that I'd be making Jacques uncomfortable by sticking around. Alice told me that she saw in a vision that I would permanently leave the family. She said that I'm too weak to live with them because I have the least amount of control. She handed me the keys to a brand new Cadillac Escalade that was packed with all of my belongings, Carlisle asked for his black charge card back and gave me a thousand dollars in cash for gas, then they basically sent me away. Oh, and he had the nerve to say that he'd always think of me as his son. I don't even have a fucking cell phone anymore. That fucking little bitch used all of my cash and assets that I earned when I was with Maria."

I was going to say something, but Bella spoke. "First of all, Jasper. You need to pull your head out of your ass and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Man the fuck up and pull your nutsacks out of your groin. I don't know if you noticed, but that veggie vamp coven that you used to call a family has a history of screwing people over and leaving them high and dry. Look around this room and you tell me how many people have been fucked over by the Cullens?"

Jasper looked around and put his face in his hands. I think he just realized that, with the exception of, Riley and Bree who had never met them and Victoria who only met them in passing, everyone else had some kind of issue with the Cullens.

Garrett took a deep breath. He's known Jasper as long as I have and he hated to see him hurting. "Has Alice given you divorce papers yet?"

"No, this all happened a couple of nights ago. I've been driving non-stop so I could get here."

"Don't si..." Garrett was interrupted by my cell phone ringing. Who the fuck is calling me at this time of night?

"Peter, it's Alice. Can I speak to Jasper, please?" Her shrill voice assaulted my eardrums. I put two fingers to my lips warning everyone to keep quiet.

"Why? So you can fuck him over some more? How did you know he was here anyway?" I asked.

"I saw him make a decision to go to you, now can I speak to him?" She snapped. Bitch.

I passed the phone to Jasper. Alice started speaking in her annoying, high-pitched, squeal immediately. "Jazzy, I just wanted to make sure you got to Peter's okay. I still worry about you even though we're no longer mated. Anyhoo, as soon as you got into Farragut, you completely disappeared from my visions. I can't see anything to do with Peter really. It's been that way ever since he made the decision to change his turn signal at Walmart. I got one vision of him shopping at a Walmart with another blonde male purchasing that awful series True Blood that makes a mockery of vampires, a woman's romance novel called the Vampire and the Virgin, a copy of Cosmo Magazine with the article Amazing Anal Play in it, and a tube of heated lubrication. Jazzy, I think your friend may have developed some homosexual tendencies so I would be very careful of your orifices while you're around him. I still care about your well being, you know. I was your mate at one point and I'm still your wife for the time being. Besides, you have to uphold the image of once having been mated to me for my sake. Speaking of which, I'm mailing some paperwork to you that I need you to fill out and sign immediately. Anyway, be very careful, I can't see you in my visions while you're there. Just put in a call to me every now and then so I know what you're up to. Oh, and sign the papers. They're all set for you—you don't even have to read them. I saw in a vision that you won't. Good luck, I'm sure we'll run into each other sometime."

As soon as the call ended, we all burst laughing. Garrett asked me if I really bought the stuff that Alice mentioned.

"Yeah, I did. She saw me with Riley. We ran down to Walmart to get copies of True Blood on DVD and called the girls to ask if they needed anything. Bella wanted to read Cosmo, Bree wanted a vampire romance book, and Vicky asked for the tube of lube. The fucking cashier insisted we were gay—we couldn't convince her otherwise."

"Hell, even I'd think you're a fag and I'm dressed like one right now." Jasper pointed out. I took a good look at Jasper, and, yep, he was dressed to the nines in some kind of designer men's outfit complete with a shimmery silk shirt. He looked like Euro trash.

"You know, the age of disco ended in 1979. I know, I was there for Disco Demolition Night at Comiskey Park during the White Sox/Tigers game. James and Laurent were both crying at the loss. In hindsight, I think I was the only one actually there for the baseball game." Vicky mused.

"What's with the bouffant hairdo?" Bella asked, looking at Jasper.

"Um, Alice told me that this is the style that suits me the best." Jasper said sheepishly.

"Well, you look like a freak. Take a good look at the guys around you, they all have normal men's haircuts. You, however, look like Annette Funicello in a vintage Skippy Peanut Butter commercial." Bella pointed out. "Has it ever occurred to you that Alice made you style your hair the way you do because it made her look good?"

"Yeah, I agree with Bella." Heidi said. "Keep in mind also that, unlike the rest of us, she can't grow hair so she's stuck with that fucked up haircut for eternity. I have my shears with me. I'll cut your hair for you."

Heidi worked as a hairdresser by trade. She was actually pretty popular and had tons of high-end clients. She didn't need to work. Garrett made loads of money as an attorney and she had money of her own from her time with the Volturi, but she liked to keep herself busy.

"Thanks, Heidi. Uh, Peter, can I borrow some of your clothes until I can get some of my own? I know for a fact that I don't own any jeans."

I looked over at Bella and she was seething. "If I ever get my hands on that twitchy elfpire, I'm going to...to...ugh...look what she did to Jasper! You said that he was some sort of a major in a vampire army. Jasper! You can't even make a decision for yourself. She did everything for you! She picked your clothes, your hairstyle, she probably even told you when you should or shouldn't jerk off."

Jasper looked down at his toes when Bella said that.

Bella continued with her rant. "She did, didn't she? How could you let her manipulate you like that? Oh, and did it ever occur to you how fucked up that family is? How the fuck can you be someone's mate and suddenly say, 'Oops! You're not my mate anymore. Kindly fuck off so I can play with my new mate.' Jasper, there's no way in hell you and Alice were mates—she wouldn't have been able to throw you away so easily."

She had a point-a very good point and Jasper was just realizing it.

"That miserable, lying, little manipulative whore!" Jasper shouted. "You're right, Bella! How the fuck did I let her control me for so many years! Damn it all to hell!"

"Jasper, when she sends you those divorce papers. Give them to me." Garrett snickered. "I'll get you at least some of your money back. Do you have any receipts or proof of any transactions?"

"I've got them all. I was meticulous with my records. Most of what's in the Escalade are from my office. She didn't want any evidence that I was ever in her life." Jasper said.

"You know, those Cullens seem like a piece of work. Is there any way that we can exact some sort of vengeance on them? I, for one, have a bone to pick with them regarding what they did to Bella." Bree had her fists balled up and her eyes were pitch black with anger.

"I'm going to start looking into various ways to create a legal quagmire for them. Bella, you said that you had to stay in the hospital after Edward abandoned you in the forest. Do you remember the name of the hospital?"

"Yes, I do, it was Forks General, why?"

"I'm going to use that information to help build a case against them." Garrett's mind was spinning in a hundred different directions. He was about to make life for the Cullens a living nightmare.

"What time is it?" Vicky suddenly asked.

"Almost midnight, why?" I said.

"Oh, cause I have to go to work soon." She sighed.

"You found a job already? You just got here." I was a bit shocked.

Before she could answer my question, a cell phone from her backpack started ringing. "Everyone stay quiet! This is work." Vicky pulled a laptop out of her backpack and answered her cell. "This is Pussymart where we have the best hoochies and tastiest tatas to make all your sexual fantasies come true, how may I help you?"

"Um, how much do you charge?" The caller said.

"$4.99 a minute, taxes and fees are extra. We accept Visa and Mastercard." Vicky replied while she booted up her laptop. "What kind of a woman are you looking for."

"I want to speak to someone that reminds me of my aunt." The sick asshole said.

"I have the perfect woman for you, I can take your credit card number and run it through for you." Vicky took the pervert's number and ran it through some program on her computer. "Okay, you're all set. If you run over a half an hour, I'll have to run your card through again. Hold the line please, she's waiting for you."

Vicky came back on the line after twenty seconds and said in a seductive voice, "This is Aunt Jizzie. I heard you wanted to talk to me. Which one of my bad nephews is this?"

"This is Jack."

"Well, Jack, why don't you tell me how I should punish you? Can I strip you down and take a flogger to you?"

We could hear the fucking freak jerking off. "What are you wearing?" Jack asked.

"What do you think I'm wearing, Jack?" Vicky, er Aunt Jizzie, breathed into the phone.

"Leather! Black leather chaps and studs!" Jack moaned.

"That's exactly what I'm wearing baby. I'm flogging your bare ass now. It's all red. Do you feel that?"

"Yes! I feel it, ugh, it hurts!"

"Maybe since you've been such a good boy, I'll let you eat my pussy now."

"Please, yes, I need to. You taste so good!"

"Yes, this pussy's only for you, Jack. Your tongue does things to me. Oh my God! You're a master—your tongue is like velvet." She cried into the phone.

Ten more minutes of this bullshit and Vicky had this Jack dude screaming. "Spank me, Aunty! Spank me some more, I'm going to cu...aaaaggggghhhhhhhhh! Aunt Jizzie!"

He ended the call and Vicky put the charges through on his credit card.

We all sat there staring at Vicky dumbfounded. "What? I kept getting fired so I thought I'd try my hand at my own business. It's actually working out great. I've been averaging over a thousand bucks a night. I can even do this while I'm hunting. I have an app on my iPhone that lets me run credit cards through and with bluetooth I can keep talking."

Sure, I can just picture her having phone sex while she's hunting. "Uh, could you hang on a second please? I just have to break this fucker's neck and drain him—you just continue jerking off."

"Seriously, V? Phone sex?" Bella asked. "Doesn't it gross you out to talk to these repressed fuckers every night just to hear them jerk off?"

"Nah, I don't give a shit. These fuckers don't mean a thing to me. It's just act. Plus, I get to put my training to good use."

"What training is that?" I asked.

"Oh, I was an actress on Broadway when I was changed. I used to be a Rockette, too. I got fired when the director tried to make a move on me and I kicked him in the nuts. I was changed right after that in 1940."

Her cell phone rang and she took another call. This time she pretended to be Asia Tightania. That call took over two hours. She had to keep running the credit card through over and over. Oh boy. Bella sure has some interesting friends.

The rest of us decided to take Bella for a hunt so we could let Vicky work in private.

"Tell me there's a soundproofed office or something where Vicky can take her calls in that second house of yours? Riley asked. "It's been non-stop phone sex for two weeks straight! Bree worked the overnight shift so it was fine for her, but I had to listen to that shit for four hours every night. Layla Luvstosuck was the worst. The perv on the line wanted her to pretend like she was gagging on his cock so she took a dildo, stuffed it in her mouth, and made gagging noises."

"Sounds like Vicky!" Bella started chuckling.

"Alright, who needs to feed other than Bella?" I asked, getting down to business. We were in Pittsburgh looking for a meal.

"Oh! I hear a woman being raped in the southeast direction." Bree keened into her senses. "Thirty-eight blocks—that way!"

We all ran after her. "She's gonna come in handy." Garrett commented.

No shit. No wonder Bella calls her Supergirl. That's some pretty cool power.

When we got there, the poor girl was being raped by four men. I didn't really need to feed, but Bella, being a newborn did. Jasper must have made the decision to take Vicky's advice and change his diet because he took out one fucker immediately. Heidi and Riley each took a rapist too.

Bella looked up at Jasper's new crimson eyes. "You look better that way. Now all we have to do is get rid of the hair."

I don't know what made him do it, but Jasper pulled Bella in for a hug. "Thanks, Bella. You know, I missed feeling all of your emotions after we left Forks." He kissed her on top of her head before letting her go.

By the time we got back, Vicky was done with work for the night. We helped her, Riley, and Bree set up in my second house, then I went with Riley to return the moving truck to Uhaul.

"You know." Jasper said. "I think we can test Bella out in public today. She was fine last night. I didn't feel one ounce of bloodlust coming from her and that girl was bleeding profusely."

I forgot how handy Jasper's gift could be. "Oh, please, Peter? I've been cooped up here for three weeks. What if I go bat-shit crazy and end up like one of the Cullen women? What if my vagina fuses shut and I grow a dick with no balls?"

"I think with all of us with her she'll be fine." Garrett pointed out. "Don't you two need a new bed? The one Bella was tied to naked was half sunken to the floor."

"Why the hell was Bella tied naked to a bed?" Vicky asked, crossing her arms in front of her.

"We were fucking." Bella replied.

"With Garrett?"

"Uh, no. Peter and I were fucking and Garrett and I were just saying hello to each other."

"You fucking perverts!" Vicky yelled at me and Garrett.

"Yeah, sure, this coming from a phone sex operator!" I shouted back.

"There's a difference. I'm a thespian. That was just acting." Vicky replied, nonchalantly.

"I liked being tied to the bed." Bella said, smugly.

"Bells, we've got to discuss your kinky, exhibitionist tendencies. I mean, this isn't the first time you've been a little wild. Remember that wet t-shirt contest you were in during your senior year of college?"

"Hey, I won that."

"Of course you were going to win it. You took your shirt off on stage!"

"I may have been a little drunk." Bella shrugged. "Besides, Paul and Riley were the ones who yelled that I should take my shirt off."

"Oh, we definitely have to go see if you have enough control of your bloodlust. I want to go play with Bella at a bar!" Heidi declared. "Let's go to a furniture store to get you a new bed. You need one with wrought iron slats in the headboard. They hold up better than wood. We'll just bring rope with us and test them out."

I'm such a lucky fucker! I've got a kinky mate on top of all the other great things about her!

"Yeah, fucker, you are lucky. By the way, the seer bitch can't see you because your mate's a shield." Brewmaster decided to pop in just then.

"A shield, really?" I asked Brewmaster.

"Yep, she can keep you guys shielded within a twenty mile radius. Now you guys can really fuck up the Cullens. You just have to make sure you keep her near you."

Well, hot diggity! I am a lucky fucker!

"Guys! My gift just told me Bella's a shield! That's why Alice can't see anything." I announced. I was so happy that I couldn't hold it in any longer.

"That fucking makes sense!" Jasper said with realization. "Edward could never read her mind—even as a human. That's also why she has good control of her bloodlust at only three weeks old. I bet you anything that she's a mental and physical shield."

"Oh, we can really mess with those pretentious Cullens now." Garrett smiled, maliciously. "They won't be able to see a thing. I think between everyone's gifts, our little family may be more powerful than that fucked up veggie coven. We have Peter's little fucker in his head, Bella's shield, Jasper's empathic mojo, Bree's Supergirl senses, my gift of persuasion, Heidi's allure, and are we missing anyone?"

"Vicky has the ability to get us all out of tight spots and Riley can implant false thoughts and memories." Bree informed us.

"Oh, fuck, yeah!" Jasper said excitedly. "We can have some fucking fun with that one!"

"You do realize that our family is virtually indestructible. Every single vampire has a gift and powerful ones at that." Garrett pointed out. "The Cullens can never find out about our abilities. That means we have to work on training Bella and harnessing her shield before we start anything. Heidi, how would you like to move out here? I think it would be safer for everyone and it would be nice for you to have some girlfriends near you."

"I'm all for it, but what about your legal practice and my job?" Heidi asked.

"I do most of my work from home anyway. I can run to Philadelphia in a thirty minutes if I need to so it's not a problem. We'll keep the penthouse there, of course. As for your job, why not open your own salon in Williamsport? You've been wanting to do that for a while now."

"Okay, let's do it." Heidi said with conviction.

So, it was decided that all of us would live together as one big, happy family and band together to make life as miserable as possible for the Cullens. I guess this vampire life isn't too lonely after all.

What do you think of our vampires' superpowers? Do you like Garrett and Heidi? Garrett's introduction to Bella was certainly, um, interesting, wasn't it? Now, as for Jasper-what's your opinion on him? I'd love to hear your thoughts. As always, I promise to reply. XOXO mama4dukes